Deep Blue Secret (15 page)

I couldn’t believe what I was seeing.

If he read this, that meant he knew everything about me. He knew about the pool party in eighth grade with the boogie board incident and my bathing suit top coming loose. He knew about the football game my freshman year when I accidentally sat on Lindsey’s nachos.

Oh no, I wrote about
him
in there too; about when I met him at the beach. I said he was amazing and I might even love him.
Someone please just shoot me now
, I thought.
Before I die of humiliation
.

My breaths quickened and I tried to calm myself. Maybe there was a chance he didn’t read it. Any decent person knew it was just plain wrong to read someone else’s diary.

I glared at him and spoke in a slow, clear voice. “Please tell me you didn’t read this.”

He looked at me sheepishly and shrugged. “Well, kind of. Please don’t be angry…”

Of course I was angry.

“That’s so not fair,” I said. “Now you know every tiny detail about me and I still know nothing about you. This is so embarrassing. You must think I’m a complete idiot.”

Rayne placed a hand on the side of my arm. My tensed muscles relaxed at his touch. He was skilled in calming my emotions.

“Sadie,” he said, almost holding back a chuckle. “Even your most embarrassing moments are completely charming.”

My words stuck to my throat. “But I…”

What was he saying? He liked that I was an idiot? 

“I just…I don’t understand why you have these,” I said, holding up the identical purple books.

He took one from my grasp. “You hold onto that one and I’ll show you,” he said.

I let the book go reluctantly and watched as he pulled a pen out of his bag. He opened the book and wrote on one of the pages, then clapped it shut.

“Okay, your turn,” he said.

I stared at him. “You want me to write something in my book?”

“No, just look at it,” he said with a grin.

He flipped it right side up in my hand. A light suddenly glowed from the cover. I held it up in surprise. The usually dark rhinestone at the center of the butterfly was illuminated like a tiny purple light bulb. I’d never seen it do that before.

“What did you do?” I said. “How does that work?” I flipped the book around and examined it, not sure what I was looking for.

“Look closer,” he prompted, “at the light.”

I held the light directly in front of my face. A number glowed inside the center of the stone.

“Eighty-seven?” I wondered aloud.

“Page eight-seven,” he added.

“Oh…” I breathed in understanding.

I rummaged through the pages, eager to see what they held in store. I finally read the number eighty-seven on the page and looked up excitedly at Rayne’s thoughtful face, his eyes glowing faint green through the dark.

There was something written at the top of the page. The handwriting was small and neat, printed in all caps:

DEAR SADIE,

I’M SORRY I READ YOUR DIARY. CAN YOU EVER FORGIVE ME? I’LL BEG IF I HAVE TO. PRETTY PLEASE? WITH SUGAR ON TOP?

~RAYNE

I gave him an incredulous glance. “You just wrote something in there,” I pointed to the book in his hand. “And somehow the words instantly appear in this one?”

I held the book closed with just a finger holding my place on the page. As I held it up I noticed the light was gone. I stared at it in examination.

“The light resets after you open the book to the correct page,” he said. He held the pen towards me. “It works the same way with both books. Now you can respond to my message in your own book and I’ll be able to read it here.”

How was it that each time I was with him he found a way to amaze me even more?

“So how does it work?” I said. “Is this some kind of trick with that special liquid again? You used it to make a copy of my diary or something?”

“No, it’s nothing like that,” he said. “It’s called a Twin Document. Advanced technology networks the pages together. I’m not really involved with the technical side of things. Even I don’t know much about it, but they’re very rare.”

I had to admit…that was pretty cool.

I marveled aloud, “Like super-disguised text messaging.”

I forgot about my embarrassment when I realized he was showing me a way to communicate with him while he was gone.

“This pair was made especially for you,” he said. “Well, for me, as an added way to look after you.”

My spirits lifted slightly. I might be able to hear from him while he was gone rather than being left helplessly in the dark.

“So what you’re saying is, you have a copy of my diary so you can spy on me,” I said playfully.

Deep down I knew what it really meant; it meant that, for some reason, great measures were being taken to ensure Rayne could watch over me. I suppressed my fears. It felt easier at the moment to make light of the situation. I wasn’t sure I was ready to accept whatever truth was at the center of it all.

“You
are
pretty fun to spy on,” he said.

I pushed on his arm. “Oh really?”

He smiled but took a step back. “Anyway, now you have a way to get a hold of me while I’m gone.” I wasn’t sure what it was but I felt distance in his tone. Suddenly I was just his assignment again.

“Wouldn’t it be easier if you gave me your number?” I asked. “Don’t you have a cell phone?” It seemed a little dramatic to need some high-tech device to communicate.

“Yes, I have a cell phone, but I’ll be travelling out of signal range for a good part of the time. The book will work pretty much anywhere,” he explained.

Out of signal range? How far away was he planning to go?

“Let me see it,” I said holding out my hand with a grin.

He looked at me hesitantly and didn’t move.

“It’s just a phone.
Please?
” I cooed, fluttering my eyelashes.

He rolled his eyes with an amused grin and handed over his phone. I was surprised he’d given in so easily. I dialed my number onto the device and pulled my own phone out of my pocket which was set to silent. My phone buzzed in my palm at the incoming call.

“There. Now I have your number,” I said. “And you have mine.”

He reached for his phone and put it away. “I already have your number, Sadie.”

My cheeks flushed. “Well, maybe now you’ll actually call me sometime.” I looked at him hopefully.

His face stiffened. “Right now it’s probably better if we stick to using the diary. You shouldn’t dial my number unless it’s an emergency.”

I was mortified. How could I be so stupid? Of course he didn’t want to call me. What he wanted was to do his job, to protect his assignment. How could I read his signals so wrong? But the way he looked at me sometimes, and touched me so gently…

“Sure, of course,” I said, hiding my anxiety.

I leaned against the wall and stared at the streetlights.

He followed me. “Was there something you wanted to tell me earlier? Before I interrupted?”

My eyes darted to the side. There was no way I could ask him to go to the dance with me now. He didn’t even want me to call him on the phone.

“It’s not a big deal,” I said, squirming. “Just forget I mentioned it.”

With a huff I hurried towards the entrance of the metal door.

 “Sadie, wait,” he said, catching up to me, tone apologetic. “Please tell me.”

“It’s a dumb idea. You’ll think it’s stupid.”

I looked to the ground. His hand lifted my chin carefully, searching my eyes with his. His soft touch taunted me, spurring the longing inside me he continued to deny.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered. “I don’t think your ideas are dumb, please tell me.”

My legs rocked forward and back. “I…I was going to ask if you could do me a small favor.”

I couldn’t ask him to be my date. I was too scared. He would reject me. It would just be him doing me a favor.

“A favor? I could probably do that,” he said.

“There’s a dance this Saturday at my school.” I glanced at him and shot my eyes away again. “My friends really want me to go, but it’s girl ask guy and…”

I spouted the words as quickly as possible. “And since I’ve been in the hospital I didn’t have time to find a date, but it doesn’t have to be a date, it would just be a favor, you know, so I don’t have to go alone. We wouldn’t have to tell anyone who you really are, we could just tell them we met at the beach the other night. Of course now you might not even be here in a few days anyway so…”

I finally had the courage to stop and look at him for a response. My heart beat faster than my words rambled.

He stood still and frozen. “You want me to go to a school dance with you?” He was obviously surprised by my request.

My mouth squeaked, questioning my own words. “Yes?”

I wanted to crawl into a hole and hide.

“Uh, Sadie, that’s not…” His voice trailed awkwardly.

My insecurities mounted. “Just…never mind,” I said. Heat pulsed fiercely inside me.

After a few sporadic thumps in my chest he spoke again with a smooth, confident tone. “Actually, on second thought, I will take you to the dance.”

On second thought?
It wasn’t exactly the romantic moment I’d hoped for, but, if my burning ears heard correctly, he said
yes
.

“Wait, you will?” I asked.

“I don’t think I’ll have a problem getting back by then. And if I recall correctly,” he said with a tinge of humor, “the last time you went out alone with a guy you ended up in the emergency room.”

I laughed weakly. “True…”

“I would have to trail you all night anyway, for my own piece of mind. Now that you know about me, it would be easier if I didn’t have to hide in the shadows. At least I would be the one driving.”

Right, of course,
I thought. It would be easier for him to do his job and protect me if he had a reason to be with me all night. But he would be with me all night; that would have to be enough. I had to be near him. I would endure the mixed signals and the rejection. They couldn’t compare to the heartache I would endure if he left me too long.

“Great, then we have a d–”
No, it’s not a date,
I thought stammering. “…a plan.”

Rayne’s gaze shifted to the distance. The night felt colder now; the mystery and romance of the rooftop had slipped away to the night.

“There’s something you have to understand, Sadie.”

“Okay,” I said.

His eyes were serious. “I’m not supposed to get emotionally involved with anyone. It’s a requirement of my job. I’m breaking a lot of rules just talking to you and I can’t take further risks. I need to make sure you understand this. I…I don’t want you to get your feelings hurt.”

Was my heart still thumping in my chest? For a moment I thought it failed me. So it was certain; I didn’t have to wonder anymore. Any small hope I’d held onto was gone.

He didn’t love me.       

Voss tapped impatiently on the steering wheel of his McLaren MP4-12C; the newest edition to his collection of cars. If he had to wait, at least he could do it in style. He lifted his head, eyes closed, and breathed in the smell of civilization…and freedom.

His mind went back to his last conversation. After thirty-six years, Voss still didn’t understand his own son. 

Ash had made such a fuss about involving his little, farm-boy friend,
Rayne
, in Voss’s plans. He never understood why Ash insisted on being friends with such a simpleton in the first place; the boy’s skills and intelligence were certainly no match for anyone in
their
family.

The Hastings came from a long line of Scouts and Council Members; beginning with Sir Thomas Hastings himself. The name meant something once. It seemed like they let just about any old fool into the Academy these days.

Like Rayne Stevens.

Voss mumbled a scoff under his breath. “Stevens.”
Please
, no one important had even heard the name before.

Why couldn’t his son grasp the importance of his own station? Ash knew where his loyalties should lie, yet he always managed to be a disappointment. Why did his son choose to associate himself with such buffoons?

Voss laughed to himself dryly. “Speaking of buffoons…”

Rayne Stevens crossed the lot towards Voss’s parked car.

Now here I am, having to stoop down to the same level
, Voss thought. He slammed the car door behind him and stood sternly in his place never breaking his glare from Rayne’s.
What a weak excuse for a Keeper.

“Mr. Stevens…how good of you to join me,” Voss said.

Rayne’s glare remained intact. “Skip the intros; let’s just get this over with.”

“Fine. I trust Ash made it clear on the phone why I wanted to meet you here.”

Rayne folded his arms with contempt, his tone sarcastic. “
Yeah
. I think I got the gist of it.”

“Good, then I have a message for you to pass on to your dearest Hamlin. Do you think you can handle that or should I find some crayons for you to take notes?”

Rayne gritted his teeth. “Give me one good reason why I shouldn’t take you out right here and now.”

Voss didn’t hesitate, his smile smug. “Because I know about your cute little friend…
Sadie
is it?”

Rayne scowled and leapt forward with a furious fist, but he stopped just before his target.

Voss pulled open his suit coat, flashing a concealed weapon in warning, and glanced across the grass at a playground full of children. “Plus, it would be a shame if you had to rush to the aid of a dying child, hit tragically by a stray bullet.”

“You’re joking, right? Even you wouldn’t stoop that low.”

“I never joke, Mr. Stevens. I do what it takes. You have a choice: the hard way or the easy way.”

“Fine. Just give me the stupid message then.”

Voss smiled and refastened the buttons of his suit. “Tell Hamlin: not only do I know about his precious little secret, but I’m perfectly capable of revealing that information to whomever I want, when I want. If he has any interest in preserving his position and reputation, he will find a way to convince the Council to exonerate me of my crimes and reinstate my position. Otherwise, I can’t make any promises.”

Rayne stared in disbelief. “You know he’ll never comply.”

“Yes, well I’m afraid I’m not interested in your opinion, Mr. Stevens. But if you could just relay the message exactly as I’ve stated it, that will suffice.”

Voss opened his car door with a smirk. “Oh, and don’t try anything…clever.”

His dark eyes turned suddenly fierce. “I’m not working alone this time. I have backups waiting to hear from me. If they don’t hear my voice every twenty-four hours, someone—like maybe a cute little blonde-haired someone—could end up getting hurt.”

Voss continued to glare until he’d made his intentions clear. “Of this you can be sure, Mr. Stevens. We’ll be watching you.”