Do Penguins Have Knees? (46 page)

Read Do Penguins Have Knees? Online

Authors: David Feldman

smell of used

textures of

Traffic control

55 mph speed limit

traffic lights

Traffic flow, clumping of, on highways

Traffic jams, clearing of, on highways

Traffic lights

colors on

timing of, in New York and Washington, D.C.

Traffic noise in U.S., versus other countries

Traffic signal light bulbs, lifespan of

Traffic signs

DONT WALK
, lack of apostrophe on

FALLING ROCK
, purpose of

placement of “Dangerous Curve,”

Trailer parks

tires atop mobile homes in

tornadoes and

Train stations, ceilings of

Trains

backward locomotives in

EXEMPT
signs at railroad crossings

Tread, tire, disappearance of

Treasurer, U.S., gender of

Treasury, printing of new bills by

Treble clefs, dots on

Trees

bark, color of

growth in cities

growth on slopes of

Triton, orbit pattern of

Tropical fish, oxygen in

Trucks

idling of engines of

license plates on

origins of term “semi” and

“Tsk-Tsk,” stroking of index fingers and

Tuba bells, orientation of

Tuesday

release of CDs

U.S. elections and

Tumbleweed, tumbling of

Tuna, cat food, cans of

Tunnels, ceramic tiles in

Tupperware and home parties

“Turkey,” in bowling, origin of term

Turkeys

beards on

white versus dark meat

Turn signals in automobiles, clicking sounds of

TV Guide
, order of listings in

Twenty-four second clock in NBA basketball

Twenty-one as age of majority

Twenty-one gun salute, origins of

“Twenty-three skidoo,”

Twins, identical, DNA and

Twitches during sleep

Twix cookie bars, holes in

“Two bits,” origins of term

Two by fours, measurement of

Two-minute warning, football and

Typewriter keys, location of

 

 

 

“U” in University of Miami football helmets

Ultraviolet and attraction of insects

Umpires and home plate sweeping

“Uncouth,”

Underarm hair, purpose of

Underwear, labels on

Uniforms

painters’ whites

surgeons’, color of

United States Mint and shipment of coin sets

United States Postal System (USPS)

CAR-RT SORT on envelopes

translation of foreign mail and

undeliverable mail

University of Miami

football helmets

“Hurricanes” nickname

University of North Carolina and Tar Heels

University of South Florida, location of

Unleaded gasoline, cost of

Unlisted telephone numbers, charges for

Unscented hair spray, smell of

“Upper crust,”

Upper lips, groove on

UPS

shipment of coin sets

used trucks, nonexistence of

Urinals, ice in

Urination, running water and

Uvula, purpose of

 

 

 

Vaccination marks, hair growth and

Valve stems on fire hydrants, shape of

VCRs, counter numbers on

Vegetable oil, vegetables in

Vegetable oils, vegetables in

Vending machines

bill counting and

freezing of soft drinks in

half dollars and

pennies and

placement of snacks in

“Use Correct Change” light on

Vent windows, side, in automobiles

Vestments

color of Catholic priests’

color of popes’

Videocassette boxes, configuration of

Videocassette recorders

counters on

power surges and

Videotape recorders

“play” and “record” switches on

storms and

Videotape versus audiotape, two sides of

Videotapes, rental, two-tone signals on

Violin bows, white dots on frogs of

Virgin acrylic

Virgin olive oil

Vision

Vitamins, measurement of, in foods

Voices

causes of high and low

elderly versus younger

perception of, own versus others’

Volkswagen Beetles, elimination of

Vomiting and horses

 

 

 

“Waffling,”

Wagon wheels in film, movement of

Waiters’ tips and credit cards

Walking the plank, pirates and

Walking, race, judging of

Wall Street Journal
, lack of photographs in

Warmth and its effect on pain

Warning labels, mattress tag

Warts, frogs and toads and

Washing machine agitators, movement of

Washing machines, top-versus bottom-loading, and detergent

Washington, D.C., “J” Street in

Watch, versus clock, distinctions between

“Watch,” origins of term

Watches and placement on left hand

Water

bottled, expiration dates on

chemical manufacture of

clouds in tap water

color of

Water faucets

bathroom versus kitchen

location of, hot versus cold

Water temperature

effect on stain

versus air temperature, perception of

Water towers

height of

winter and

Water, boiling during home births

Water, cold, kitchen versus bathroom

Watermelon seeds, white versus black

Wax, whereabouts in dripless candles

“Wear his heart on his sleeve,”

“Weasel words,”

Weather

clear days following storms

forecasting of, in different regions

partly cloudy versus partly sunny

smell of impending rain

West coast versus East coast

See also particular conditions
.

Wedding etiquette, congratulations to bride and groom and

Wedding invitations, tissue paper in

Weigh stations, highway, predictable closure of

Wells, roundness of

Wendy’s hamburgers, square shape of

Western Union telegrams

exclamation marks and

periods

Wet noses, dogs and

Wetness, effect of, on color

Whales, sperm, head oil in

Whiplash, delayed reaction of

Whips, cracking sound of

Whistling at sporting events

White Castle hamburgers, holes in

White chocolate, versus brown chocolate

“White elephant,”

White paint on homes

White pepper, source of

White wine, black grapes and

Whitewall tires

bluish tinge on

thickness of

Wigwams near highway

Wind on lakes, effect of different times on

Window cleaning, newspapers and

Window envelopes, use by mass mailers

Windows, rear, of automobiles

Windshield wipers, buses versus automobile

Wine

chianti and straw-covered bottles

dryness of

temperature of serving, red versus white

white, black grapes and

Wine glasses, types of

Wine tasters, drunkenness in

Wing-tip shoes, holes in

Winter, first day of

Wisdom teeth, purpose of

Women

dancing ability

fainting

feelings of coldness

group restroom visits

hair length of aging

leg kicking when kissing

remote control usage

spitting

uncomfortable shoes

Wood, popping noise of, in fires

Woodpeckers, headaches and

Wool

shrinkage of

smell of, when wet

Worms

appearance on sidewalk after rain

as fish food

birds and

in tequila bottles

larvae and

survival during winter

Wrapping

Burger King sandwiches

chewing gum

gift box chocolate

Wrinkles on extremities

Wrists as perfume target

Wristwatches, placement on left hand

 

 

 

X

as symbol for kiss

as symbol in algebra

“X ray,”

“Xmas,” origins of term

X-rated movies, versus XXX-rated movies

“XXX [liquor],”

 

 

 

Yawning, contagiousness of

Yeast in bread, effect of

Yellow, aversion of insects to

Yellow Freight Systems, orange trucks of

Yellow lights, timing of, in traffic lights

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