Enchanted and Desired (45 page)

“What shall we call her? Baby Foster is cute and all, but she deserve a beautiful name.”

“I did have a thought before they put me to sleep. They told me I had a daughter, and I thought Verona was nice, but if you don’t like it we can pick something else.” A slow, genuine smile spreads over his face.

“Verona Foster. I love it.”

“No. Her name is Verona Mantovani.” I have never seen a smile so beautiful, so real, and filled with such all-consuming love.

“You mean it?” I nod my head, delighting in his reaction.

“I don’t know what to say Jess. Thank you baby, thank you so much.” His lips press tender kisses all over my face; every inch caressed by his gentle touch until he reaches my mouth. We share a heartfelt kiss, slow, soft, sensual and emotional. “I love you Jess.”

We spend an hour with Verona, talking to her, looking at her, and just watching her breathe. The nurse came by at one point, and told us she’s doing really well, and they’re feeling positive about her chances. I know it’s still early, and anything could happen, but I can just feel it; I know she’s going to pull through this. She’s a little fighter.

The only reason I agree to leave her and go back to my room is because I’m in a lot of pain after sitting up for that length of time, and Simon insisted. He lifts me back into my bed, and I just want to cling to him and never let go.

“You shouldn’t be lifting me with a broken hand.” He lets out a small chuckle.

“You weigh about sixty pounds Jess. I think I can handle it.” He can always make me laugh, even when every muscle in my body hurts to do so.

“Don’t make me laugh, it hurts.”

“Sorry Jester. No more fun. I promise.”

Once I’m settled in and he’s rearranged my pillows and my covers about ten times he sits down beside me and takes my hand in his.

“Si. I never thanked you.” He looks puzzled.

“For what?”

“For saving my life.” He furrows his brow, obviously uncomfortable thinking about what happened.

“The doctors and nurses told me what you did for me; that if you hadn’t stepped up and refused to give up on me, I wouldn’t be here. There is nothing I will ever be able to do to repay you for that. You gave me the opportunity to meet Verona; to tell her I love her; to tell
you
how much I love you, and how eternally sorry I am for all the heartbreak I’ve caused.” He lifts my hand to his lips and plants a firm kiss on my palm.

“Jess, the fact that you’re alive is all I will ever need. A part of me died when your heart stopped beating. My world became silent in that moment. It became meaningless without you. I never want to feel that way again.”

“I’m so sorry Simon.” He squeezes my hand a little tighter.

“Don’t ever apologize to me Jess.”

“I’ve put you through so much. I pushed you away; I ruined what we had.” His eyes are on fire. His gaze burning into my soul.

“We both said and did a lot of things that were just fucking stupid. When I thought that the last thing I would ever have said to you was that we couldn’t be together, that love wasn’t enough. I was devastated. I don’t care about any of that shit. We have a second chance to be together, to be a family, and to make the most of the time that we have. It’s a gift Jess, and I am not going to squander it. You’re stuck with me.”

“Fine by me. I love you Si. I noticed that all of the doctors and nurses think I’m your wife.” He rolls his eyes at me in a playful way, before his face becomes pensive. He sits for a moment and then reaches into his pocket, pulling something out, holding it tight in his fist. His other hand covered in a cast, holds mine as he speaks. His gaze locked on me.

“Whether you ever get to the point where you let me sign a piece of paper to make it legal, or not, you are already my wife, in every way that matters.” He opens his fist to reveal a huge emerald cut ruby ring, set in platinum. “This isn’t an engagement ring Jess. I’m not asking you to marry me. I’m never going to ask that of you. If you want to make it official at some point down the road, then you’ll need to ask me. As far as I’m concerned, you
are
my wife.”

He slides the stunning ruby onto my ring finger on my left-hand, before kissing the tip of my finger.

“You are mine Jessica Foster, and I’m yours. I vow to be the best non-husband, husband, and the best father I can possibly be. I vow to love and protect you and our precious baby girl with every last breath I have in my body. Nothing and no one will ever tear us apart. We are a family now, you, me and Verona.”

He moves his chair out of the way, dropping down onto one knee.

“I’m here, on my knee, offering you every part of myself Jess. 100% all in. Do you accept that?”

I’m overwhelmed by this amazing man, putting his heart on the line for me…again.

“Yes.” It’s all I can choke past the lump in my throat, but it’s all he needs.

“I love you so much. I swear I’m going to chain you to my fucking side from now on, so I know you’re safe. You okay with that?”

“Chains? You know I love it when you talk dirty to me!” That lightens the mood a bit.

“Even when you’re incapacitated you’re still a hot little minx. I’m going to have the worst case of blue balls by the time I’m allowed anywhere near you again.”

“You’re such a jackass.” I can’t help but laugh at the playful look on his face.

“But I’m your jackass, and you love me.”

“That’s true. I do love you, my non-hubby.” I glance down at my non-engagement, wedding-type-ring.

“When did you buy this ring?”

“Remember when we were in Florence, on the Ponte Vecchio?”

“Oh My God. You’ve had it all this time?” There’s a vulnerability in his smile that completely slays me.

“Yes.”

“You kept it, even when I walked out on you.” My heart breaks at how badly I screwed up.

“Of course. You’re it for me Jess. I held onto it, hoping like a schmuck that you would come back to me.”

“You are the most amazing man I have ever met. Do you know that?”

“I am pretty awesome. You really are a lucky girl.” I slap him in the arm, sending shocks of pain through my aching body as my hand connects with solid muscle.

“Ouch.”

“Be careful Jess. I know you love touching me, and you like it rough, but rein it in for a while will you.” He wiggles his eyebrows at me suggestively, making me laugh, and I curl my arms around my stomach to curb the pain.

“Stop making me laugh.” The playfulness is gone from his face as he gently wraps his arms around me, holding my body against his.

“Sorry baby. I’m just so happy to be here, talking and joking with you. I’ll take better care of you now. I promise.”

The nurse arrives shortly after to administer my pain meds, which I take, gladly. Simon stays with me while I drift in and out, becoming drowsy, before falling asleep, our fingers entwined and our hearts full; grateful to have a second chance together.

SIMON

Verona is such an amazing little girl. My tiny treasure; my Tesorina. I’ve been her daddy now for two weeks, and I can’t remember what my life was like without her in it. She’s a strong little thing. A survivor like her mommy.

I’ve spent every available minute with Jess and Verona, savoring every moment with them. Jess is getting stronger by the day, letting her spend more and more time by Verona’s bedside. Every day I have to force her to go back to her room to rest, and every day she fights me on it.

Verona is improving every day; her breathing is better, and she’s feeding well. She’s charming all of the nurses in the N.I.C.U., having someone sitting talking to her and cooing over her every minute of the day. She definitely gets that from her daddy! I could spend every second of every day just staring at her, marveling at how amazing she is, and I would never tire of it.

Today is the day that I get to take Jess home, as long as her blood results are good. She’s got a long recovery ahead of her, especially after the hysterectomy, but she’s so focused on Verona that it hasn’t really hit her yet. She’s managing the physical pain really well, but I’m worried about the emotional fallout for her. She still hasn’t mentioned the fact that she miscarried once before, and I’m reluctant to bring it up in case it’s just too much for her to handle at this point. All I can do is be here for her, and love her; and when she’s ready, I can listen, and try to help her through it. I just hope she lets me, when the time comes.

I stayed at my place last night rather than the hospital so that I could get Jess’s apartment organized for her coming home. It also gave me the chance to pack up my own essentials, so that I can stay with her until she’s fully recovered. I’m just praying that by then, she’ll have come around to the idea of living with me. I don’t want to be a part time dad. I want to live in the same house as Verona, with Jess. I can’t push her though; I’ve inadvertently done that in the past, and driven her away.

Walking into her apartment last night was like walking into a haunted house. Brandon and Lily took care of getting it professionally cleaned, but in my mind’s eye, I could see the crimson trail of blood in the hallway; I could see Jess lying on the floor, her lips turning blue. I stood and watched it play out, like an out of body experience, watching myself frantically trying to revive her.

I stood frozen to the spot, staring at the floor until I heard a knock on the door behind me. The door was wide open, but I think Brandon and Lily were worried they would startle me. They came to help me get the place ready for Jess, and I was grateful to have the company. We put up welcome home banners, put fresh covers on her bed, and we got a framed picture of Verona to keep her company until we get to bring her home.

I had asked Brandon to get Lily’s old room cleared out over the past few weeks, so I would have a blank canvas to turn into a room for our little princess. We spent hours last night building a crib, painting the walls pink, and filling it with all kinds of furniture and teddies and pictures that Lily picked out for me. It was around 2am by the time we finished. I know it’s going to be a while before Verona will be home with us, but I wanted Jess to see that I’m prepared for anything; that I’m ready for us to be a family. If nothing else, I’m hoping it will distract her from the ghosts that will inevitably haunt her when she walks back in here.

I was happy to get back to my apartment and crawl into my own bed. I don’t relish the idea of staying in Jess’s apartment for the foreseeable future, but I’ll do it, for her. I want her to feel comfortable, surrounded by all of her own stuff.

When I walk into Jess’s room, I’m met with an empty bed. It’s only 9am and I know exactly where she’ll be. I leave the bag I brought in for her, with some clothes to travel home in, and make my way to the N.I.C.U.

Sure enough, when I open the door, I see her sitting in the corner next to Verona’s crib. What I’m not prepared for, is the tiny baby in her arms. I’ve never seen Verona out of the incubator, and the sight of her cradled in her mother’s arms is…transcendent. I have never seen Jess look more beautiful than she does in this moment.

Our baby girl is still hooked up to tubes and machines, but today, she’s also wrapped in a tiny pink blanket, sleeping like an angel. Her little hand is wrapped around Jess’s finger, and as I crouch down beside them, she turns to greet me, her face glowing.