Climbing into my car, I gripped the
steering wheel tightly, trying to calm myself as I realised something else.
Anna and Ashton had to have known about this too – this was probably why they
told me to stay away from her.
I slammed my fist down onto the steering
wheel as the anger built even more. “Son of a bitch!”
I wasn
’
t even sure why I was so angry about it. I
’
d known her for just under three weeks, yet all I could envision
doing was storming in there and ripping that guy
’
s head off just so she
’
d
be single and I could have her to myself.
She
’
d done this on purpose, surely. Did she think it was funny leading
me on and then dropping a bombshell like this on me? Hell, she didn
’
t even drop that bombshell, I
’
d found out by accident! Would she have even
bothered to tell me at all? How long would she have let me continue believing
that she was this perfect, wonderful girl, when all along she was just playing
me?
Gritting my teeth, needing to stop thinking
about it, I started the car. I decided then and there that I would drive to the
nearest bar and pick up a girl. I
’
d
refrained from sex for the last three weeks, waiting for Rosie; well screw it,
if she was just jerking me around then there was no reason for me to go without
for a minute longer. I
’
d go pick
up a random girl and fuck her brains out.
Stopping at the nearest bar, I headed
in, desperate for a drink. My head was spinning with thoughts, and I just
didn’t want to think about that guy’s hand on her back, or how perfect the
three of them looked together. I didn’t want to think about how the little boy
in the bed had the exact same shade of reddish-brown hair that Rosie had.
I just couldn
’
t help but feel angry. Everything about the last three weeks had
been perfect. It was just typical that something had to come along and spoil
it. The one girl I actually really start to like, and it turned out she was a
complete liar and a cheat. It was different when I thought that she was just
cheating on a boyfriend because that kind of thing happened everyday, so it
didn
’
t feel as low. But the
thought of her being married, having a child, and using me for a little
excitement because her life was probably boring, the fact that if this had
carried on I might have broken up a family and home, those thoughts made me
feel a little sick.
The thing that made me feel even worse though,
was that I actually
wanted
to break up her family.
I
wanted to be
the guy that was standing by the side of the bed rubbing her back while the
little boy cried.
I
wanted to be the one that she turned to when she
needed support.
My mind kept going
back
to the little boy in the bed and I couldn
’
t help but worry about what he was there for and if he was seriously
hurt. Every bone in my body was trying to force me to walk back out to my car
and beg her for an explanation, to beg her to make this alright, beg her to
tell me that it was her neighbour
’
s
kid and that guy was her brother or something.
“Hey, what can I get you?”
I jumped a little when I realised that the
barman was talking to me. I was too busy in my own little world to notice that
I was now standing at the edge of the bar. Frowning, I shook my head, trying to
clear all of the thoughts away.
“I
’
ll have a bottle of bud and a whiskey chaser,” I answered, pulling
out my wallet. “Actually, make it a double.” I called, as he turned to make it.
He smiled sympathetically over his
shoulder. When he set the whiskey on the bar I grabbed the glass and downed it
in two gulps, enjoying the feel of the burn as it went down my throat. I pushed
the empty glass towards him.
“Stick another double in there for me.”
After my fourth drink, I was getting even
angrier about it. She
’
d used me;
me, the player who used girls, had been played at his own game! It was just
like Russell had said, Karma really had come back to bite me in the balls. This
was probably payback for all the girls I
’
d screwed over the years and then ignored.
When a blonde-haired, green-eyed girl
walked over to me and smiled, I forced a smile back, letting my eyes rake over
her. She was pretty in a slutty type of way in her short skirt and skin-tight
shirt; she wasn
’
t pretty in the
classy, effortless way that Rosie was.
Damn it, Nate, stop thinking about her!
I scolded.
I turned to the girl and forced my game
smile onto my face. She
’
d do for
tonight. Hopefully a little fooling around would quash this ache that resided
in the pit of my stomach. “Well hi there. You know what? I
’
m glad you came over because my neck was starting to hurt where I
was sneaking sly glances at you when you weren
’
t looking,
” I
flirted.
She smiled and pushed her empty glass towards
me. “
Buy me a drink?
”
I flinched at the screech tone of her
voice. Immediately, I had second thoughts about choosing her to take my mind
off things – after all, did I really want her to scream my name in
that
voice? Rosie, on the other hand, had the sexiest voice I had ever heard, and
the little moans I had already heard from her made the hair on the back of my
neck stand up.
Really, Nate, again? Stop thinking about her already!
“Sure, what do you drink?” I asked, pushing
forward with my original plan. Sex always helped clear my head. When I was down
or thinking about a kill at work, sex always took my mind off it. I just prayed
that this time wasn
’
t any
different; that once I
’
d screwed
someone that I would forget I
’
d
ever heard of the hot little brunette with the sexy smile and cute laugh.
“Are you okay?” the girl asked, putting her
hand on my arm.
I frowned and looked back at her, forcing a
smile. “Yeah sure, why wouldn
’
t I
be? I
’
m talking to the hottest
girl in the bar, of course I
’
m
okay.”
She bit her lip and looked at me through
her eyelashes. “Well are you going to get me a drink then?” she prompted,
nodding at the barman who was looking at me expectantly.
Oh fuck, how long have I been standing
there thinking about Rosie for?
I looked back at
the girl. “Sorry. So what was it that you wanted?”
She laughed. “I said vodka and Coke.”
She
’
d already answered the question? How did I not hear that in her
screechy voice? I had a feeling I would still be able to hear her from outside.
I smiled and nodded to the barman.
“Vodka and Coke for the lady, and I
’
ll have the same again.” I nodded towards my
empty glass and downed the last of my beer.
The girl stepped closer to me. “So what are
you thinking about so hard that it
’
s making you zone out like that?”
Why am I still talking to this girl?
There has to be someone else, anyone else, anyone who doesn
’
t sound like Minnie-freaking-Mouse!
I shook my head. “I really don
’
t want to talk about it.” I said the words but
that didn
’
t stop me from talking
about it though. “I mean…
I just
…
this girl… she… it
’
s been three
weeks and she… oh shit, just forget it.”
I groaned in frustration.
Get a grip,
Nate! Score with the girl, you
’
re losing her!
I plastered my game
smile on.
“Everything
’
s great. I
’
m great. You
’
re great. We
’
re all fucking great,” I sang, trying to sound enthusiastic, but I
think maybe I
’
d put a little too
much effort into it because she frowned and looked a little concerned about my
sanity.
The barman finally graced us with his
presence, setting the drinks down on the counter. As I paid for them quickly, I
picked up my glass, downing the shot. “Actually, dude, hit me again,” I
instructed. Of course, my head was going to hurt tomorrow, but I could still
imagine the smell of Rosie
’
s hair
so, clearly, I was nowhere near drunk enough yet.
The barman frowned. “Do you think that
’
s wise?”
I couldn
’
t help but laugh.
Wise? No, wise would have been listening to my
best friend when he told me to stay away from the hot little married player
girl!
“Sure, why not. If I pass out then just
throw me in a cab would ya?” I joked. He laughed and rolled his eyes before
making me another drink. I turned my attention back to the girl I would bed
tonight. “I didn
’
t catch your
name. Wait, let me guess it… I bet it
’
s Candy; because damn you look good enough to eat,” I lied. I laughed
at my own joke and she blushed. Rosie would have come back with a line there,
she wouldn
’
t have just blushed she
would have come back with something teasing or flirting.
“It
’
s Vicky,” she replied, sipping her drink, her eyes not leaving mine.
“Well it
’
s very nice to meet you Vicky, I
’
m Nate.”
An hour later I was beyond wasted and
was leaning on the bar heavily. “I didn’t know what to do, so I just walked
away. Why do you think she didn’t tell me she was married? Why didn’t she tell
me she had a kid? I mean, if you had a kid you’d tell me, right? Wait, do you
have a kid?” I slurred looking at the blonde.
What is her name again?
I
wondered.
Victoria, Verity, Veronica? Oh, screw it, I’ll just call her
Minnie from now on and see if she notices.
She frowned and shook her head; she looked
a little bored. “Look, Nate, you seem like a nice guy, and you
’
re obviously having a problem with this Rosie
girl. It
’
s pretty obvious that you
’
re still into her, so maybe you should just go
home and sober up. Give her a call in the morning,” she suggested looking a
little disappointed about it.
Call her in the morning? I
’
m not calling her in the morning! The stupid
girl had her chance, and she blew it.
I frowned.
“Why are you still talking about her anyway? I thought we agreed you
’
d drop it ten minutes ago,” I muttered
accusingly. Why had she brought her up again anyway?
The girl laughed and shook her head. “Nate,
we were talking about my job and then you just jumped in with,
‘Rosie
’
s a school teacher
’
, and then proceeded to tell me the same things over and over, like
you have been for the last half an hour.”
She scowled and folded her arms across her
chest – that was when I realised that I hadn
’
t had nearly enough to drink yet because I didn
’
t even glance down to see how her cleavage looked. Before Rosie,
that would have been the first thing I would have done, because when a girl
crossed her arms it made her boobs look hot. I forced myself to look at her
breasts just so I was behaving more like my old self, but I felt nothing. I
didn
’
t even want to bed this girl,
but I had to. I had to move on because I felt sick, I felt physically sick.
Wait,
I really do feel sick… am I actually going to puke?
I pondered it for a few
seconds – my head was spinning a little, but it wasn
’
t too bad. No, I was safe; I wasn
’
t going to vomit quite yet.
“Sorry, Minnie, it
’
s my fault. I
’
ll stop
talking about her now, but you need to stop bringing her up too,” I accused,
waving for the barman again.
She laughed and raised one questioning
eyebrow. “Minnie?”
Ah, fuck it; she noticed my reference to
the screechy cartoon mouse.
I grasped desperately
at something that wasn
’
t to do
with the fact that every time she opened her mouth all the cats in LA sat up
and looked around for their next meal.
Suddenly an idea hit me.
“Yeah Minnie, like the little mouse,” I
confirmed. “Because you
’
re so cute
I just want to pick you up and put you in my pocket and carry you around all
day.” I shrugged, chuckling into my glass, causing whiskey to slop out over the
side and onto the bar.
“Aww, that
’
s kinda sweet. No one
’
s
ever called me that before.” She smiled happily which made me laugh even
harder. She smiled seductively. “So, I was thinking… this girl
’
s hurt you, right?” she asked, stepping closer
to me. I resisted the urge to step back away from her, she was in my personal
space, and I just wanted to run away and crawl into my bed and sleep off the
alcohol that was making my legs a little unsteady.
I scoffed and frowned. Of course Rosie hadn
’
t hurt me, because that would mean I cared
about her, and I didn
’
t. I didn
’
t care about her at all. I wondered if maybe I
kept repeating the words over and over in my head they would actually start to
mean something, instead of just being a jumble of words strung together in a
sentence.
When I didn
’
t say anything, she continued. “How about you come to my place, and
I take your mind off her?” She trailed her hand down my chest until she got to
my belt buckle. “I could make you forget all about this…
Rosie
,” she
said her name like it was a dirty word and one of her fingers slipped inside
the waistband of my jeans as she stepped closer to me, pressing her chest
against mine.