Exposed (Free Falling) (21 page)

“
Yeah.  Third floor.”

“I hear those units are pretty nice.”
 
At least that’s what Jason said.

“I’ll
let you know once I have some furniture in here,” AJ joked. 

I smiled uncontrollably and he hadn’t even said anything substantial.  Just hearing his voice was enough to do the trick. 

“Are you liking the city so far at least?”

He
hesitated and then laughed a little.  “Ehh…It’ll take some getting used to.”

I remembered us discus
sing living here in the past; he wasn’t all that keen on the idea back then either.  “It can be a little overwhelming at times.  Give it a month and you’ll know the streets like the back of your hand.”

He laughed again and replied with a doubtful, “We’ll see.”

“The restaurants are amazing, though, right?  Tell me you haven’t had some of the best food you’ve ever eaten since you moved here.”  I leaned back into the couch and crossed my legs, trying to picture him at home doing whatever it was he was doing when I called.

“I haven’t had the chance to really venture out.  By the time I get off work, I’m beat.  I’m almost embarrassed to tell you what my diet has consisted of lately.”

I smiled again.  “I’ll have to show you where some of my favorite spots are sometime,” I said without thinking, making it known that I had every intention of not only
talking
to him again, but seeing him too.  Realizing what I’d done in this careless stupor he had me tangled in, I fell silent.

“Sounds like a plan,” he replied without hesitation.

My mind wandered and I scrambled for something to say.  “Have you talked to Dee and Karl lately?”

“Actually, no.
  Karl’s been pretty busy with work just like I have.  We always seem to miss each other when we call.  What about you?  Have you talked to Dee?”

I thought back to the last phone call she’d made to me – the one where she told me about AJ’s proposal.  “No, it’s been a few weeks.”

“I’m sure they’ll be here to visit sometime soon,” he added.

“Yeah.
  Probably.”  I remembered that this was just a friendly call and that I should at least
ask
about his….
Kira
.  “Your, um…fiancé, how is she?” 

It burned my
throat like you’d never believe to say those words aloud, but I was trying to be mature about this, wanting him to know that I was going to be respectful of the life he’d made for himself.  I owed him that and
then
some for the way I’d left things.

He hesitated – like,
really
hesitated.  “Good.  She’s good,” was all he said back, sounding a little shocked that I’d even asked.

Should I not have said that?  Did he think I was overstepping my bounds?  I was just trying to –

“And how’s…..what’s his name again?” AJ asked. 

I couldn’t tell if the oversight was made purposely, but either way I found it funny. 
Jason was so far from my mind, I too almost forgot his name.  “Uh – Jason.  He’s fine,” was the only answer I had because I’d ignored every single one of his phone calls for an entire week straight.  All I knew was that he was breathing and still had use of enough of his fingers to dial my number.  I cleared my throat to rid my mind of the lingering negativity that came when I thought about the wife and kid Jason kept hidden in Boston.

Freakin
’ bastard.

“How’re your parents doing?”  AJ asked, i
nterrupting my train of thought.

“
Good!  They’re doing some renovations to the house, so that’s keeping them pretty busy.”  To be polite, I asked, “How about yours?” Honestly, I couldn’t have cared less about his father, but he and Mrs. Hahn were a package deal.

The sound of AJ chuckling softly into the phone almost made me melt off the edge of the couch.  I felt all giddy like I used to
when we first started talking back in high school.  I missed this.  Missed...
him.

“My mother’s fine,” he replied, leaving Mr. Hahn out of the equation.

I had to laugh too, wondering if he’d only done that for
my
benefit, or if they still had the same strained relationship they had back in the day.  His father hated the idea of us being together ever since he discovered that I was black.  He assumed that I wouldn’t be good enough for his son, and caused trouble in our relationship whenever given the chance.  There was another lull in conversation as I drifted deeper into thought. 

AJ
broke the silence with a request.  “Tell me about your life.”

The ambiguity of the question left me scrambling for a starting point.  “Well…I work for an interior design firm.  I’ve been there ever since I interned
for them a couple years ago.  Up until recently, Angel and I were sharing an apartment, but now it’s all mine.” I tried to smile so he wouldn’t sense the air of sadness that came along with acknowledging that she’d moved out.  “Hmm…let’s see.  I’m making her room into a studio,” I added, not sure if that was even interesting enough to share.

“That’s cool.  I always wondered if you still paint
ed or not,” he interjected.

I got stuck on the word
‘always’ –
as in he’s thought about me often over the years.

“Not as much as I’d like to, but that’ll all be changing in the next couple weeks, though.  I should have everything set up by then, so…”  I looked up at the time, fifteen minutes had already passed.  “What about you?  Do you still run
every day?”  I asked.

“Not every day, but sometimes
.  I split my time equally between that and the gym.”

Clearly
.  That explained the notable definition in his arms, back, and chest when I saw him in Boston.  I replied with a casual, “Oh, okay.”

“In fact, I was looking for a good gym I could walk to
from my building.  Got any recommendations?”

I wracked my brain. 
“Mmm….nope.  Sadly, the only ‘gym’ I’m familiar with is ‘Jim’ – the owner of the bakery next door.  That man makes a mean cannoli, too, by the way.”

AJ laughed
, leaving me to swoon at the sound of it.  “Well we can’t all look as good as you do without having to work at it.”

The compliment went over my head at first, but when it came back around and my brain actually registered it, I got chills.  “
Actually, I could stand to get up close and personal with a treadmill, to be quite honest,” I countered, unsure how else to respond.

AJ sighed heavily. 
“I beg to differ…but I’ll leave it at that.”

Another hot flash.
 
Oh, god, please don’t flirt with me.  I’m not as strong as I like to think I am…

Images of him up in my personal space while we danced a few weekends ago hit me square in the face and I could see, smell, and feel him like he was there in the room with me.  I’d almost forgotten that I was on the phone until AJ spoke. 

“You know what?  I haven’t eaten yet and I’m starving,” he announced.  “You hungry?  We should go grab something together – finish our conversation face to face.”

My
chest got tight.  “Um….sure,” I replied, cringing at the sound of my voice going up an octave with excitement.

“There has to be a good pizza place around here,” he added.

I felt that same warm sensation overtake my cheeks as they tightened with a smile.  “I can name twenty without even giving it much thought,” I bragged.  My heart went to racing at the thought of getting to see him tonight.  That was unexpected. 

Already I was trying to think of what I’
d wear.  I was halfway to the bathroom to plug in my ceramic curling iron, thinking I should go ahead and call myself a cab now, when he added, “Mind if I come pick you up?”

A very specific memor
y returned.  I remembered the rush I used to feel sneaking out of the house to run to his car in the middle of the night.  The hours we’d spent together in school never seemed to be enough, leaving us with no choice but to defy our parents’ rules and sneak off to our spot.  Just like it used to do back then, my body nearly overheated and I smiled extremely hard. 

“Sure…I’ll be waiting.”

*****

A strapless, brown and navy
maxi-dress with a denim jacket to cover my arms was what I settled on.  I grabbed my gold hoops and necklace because Angel said gold accessories made the highlights in my hair ‘pop’.  I put on a light layer of bronzer, lip gloss, and gold sandals.  AJ texted about twenty minutes ago acknowledging the address I’d given him to my apartment and I was expecting him to arrive any second. 

When I heard the knock at the door, I froze in place.

‘This isn’t a date, Sam,’
I chanted internally, trying to settle my nerves.  With my hand on the knob, I blew out a breath and then pulled the door open.  There he stood, staring back at me, and I took him all in – his towering height, those smolderingly dark eyes….his body.  I finally looked up at his face again after catching myself blatantly checking him out in his dark jeans and white t-shirt – looking casually sexy just like always.  He looked and smelled absolutely amazing.  When I realized that I’d practically undressed him with my eyes, I cleared my throat.

This felt strange and familiar all at the same time.  Strange because I never imagined that AJ, the man I wrongfully walked away from years ago and left to wonder what had become of me, would ever
speak
to me again, let alone did I expect him to be standing at my door.  However, here he was, in the flesh.

“Ready?”
AJ asked after what felt like a lifetime.

I couldn’t speak, just nodded my head.  I turned to lock the door behind me and adjusted the strap of my purse over my shoulder before following him to the stairw
ell.  We descended in silence and then walked out into the night air where his car sat parked along the curb.  He unlocked it as we approached, stepping forward to open the door for me.  As I passed in front of him, he stared down on me with a familiar look in his eyes.  A look that I knew
very
well.

Lust
.

C
hapte
r
T
welve

AJ

“There’s a place I love a few blocks away.  I think that’s where we should go if you’re looking for good pizza,” Sam suggested, fastening her seatbelt.

“Sounds like a plan.  Just tell me where to go.” 
Watching her as inconspicuously as I could, I pulled out onto the street. 

I knew beforehand that
coming to see her was a bad idea.  In the very least it was disrespectful to Kira, given that I’d just promised her that I wouldn’t have any kind of contact with Sam.  However, for some reason, I didn’t have the will to deny myself another chance to at least
see
her again – not even when I thought of what it’d do to Kira if she ever found out.

Driving over to Sam’s
place, I tried to rationalize my thinking. I didn’t know if this pull toward her had to do with the way I struggled for years, trying to accept the distance between us.  Maybe now that she was so close, I simply wanted to make sure that it
stayed
that way.   But did I have that right?  To want to keep her close?  The answer came before I even finished asking the question –
No. 
I was playing with fire and I knew it.

Sam directed me to hang
two rights followed by a left, before we finally parked again.  We had a little ways to walk, but it was perfect outside so neither of us minded.  Being this close to her shouldn’t have been such a difficult task, but it was so bad that I had to put my hands in my pockets to keep from reaching for her hand or waist out of habit.  She looked at least as uncomfortable as I did.  This was what I meant when I told Terrell that it would be difficult for Sam and I to do the ‘
friends’
thing.  We were accustomed to flirting, touching, and everything else whenever the hell we wanted to without discretion.  Being her friend would mean existing side by side in a state of constant restraint.  Would it be easy? No.  But was I willing to try?  Clearly, yes, hence the reason I was forcing myself to look at the sidewalk instead of at her.

When we approached the entrance
of the small mom-and-pop pizzeria that Sam suggested, I held the door and let her go inside first.  The place wasn’t as crowded as I expected it to be, probably because it was nearly midnight on a Wednesday.  The two people in line before us finished ordering and then Sam moved up.  She asked for two slices and a couple drinks, I paid, and then we took a seat at a table near the window facing the street.

When I
stole a glance at her from across the table, her eyes lingered on mine for a moment and she smiled, something I’d noticed her doing a lot of since arriving at her apartment.  Even though I shouldn’t have – trust me I know it was wrong – but I hoped like hell all the grinning and blushing was because of me.