Falling (Bits and Pieces, Book 1) (10 page)

The next girl up was very nervous. She had a good voice, but definitely wasn’t trained like Grace and Jackie. The song she picked didn’t completely suit her voice, there were some notes she missed that were out of her range. I could tell that she tried her best and she was proud of that. Polite applause came from the audience. Her friends cheered and hugged her when she was done. As mean as it sounded, since she wasn’t
really
good, I had to sound better than her. Please, God, let me be better than her.

No one left after the other girls. Why would they? It was free entertainment for the afternoon. I wish they had. It would have been fewer people to do this in front of.

Mrs. Marshall called my name. I could hear my heart pounding in my chest and I had to remember to breathe. I thought I was going to be sick. I stood at center stage and waited for my music to start. As I looked down into the audience, I noticed Patrick and Becca in the front row. They were sitting with Grace and her friends. Becca rolled her eyes and whispered something to Grace, who laughed.

No, can’t let them distract me. I have to focus. In about four minutes, it will all be over. I took a deep cleansing breath just as “On My Own” from
Les Miserables
began to play.

The song was a blur to me. I don’t remember if I hit every note or if you could hear me at all. I just remember getting lost in the music. I blocked everything and everyone out and just sang. It felt good. I felt relaxed, until I realized where I was and who I was standing in front of. Then I got tense and self-conscious again. There was no loud cheering section of friends for me. That was fine, I could deal with that. But what was unnerving was the momentary silence afterwards. It was eerie. Those couple seconds of silence seemed to last forever. It made me wonder how bad I did, was I on-stage in my underwear or something? Was I so off-key? When I heard the clapping, I was so preoccupied with why there was delay that I couldn’t tell if it was genuine or polite. It seemed okay.

I looked at the clock on the wall and saw the time. I hurried off stage as quickly as I could without tripping. I grabbed my backpack and rushed out the door. I needed to get home. I was supposed to make dinner tonight.

“Hey, wait up!” A voice called out.

I stopped and turned around. Patrick had followed me out.

“You sure you don’t run track? ‘Cause you can be really fast when you want to be.” He teased.

“Sorry.”

“It’s okay.” He smiled. “Why’d you take off like that?”

“I need to get home.” I shrugged. I needed some affirmation that I didn’t look stupid. “I did okay, didn’t I?”

“What do you mean?” His voice was incredulous. “You were
amazing.
” His response seemed authentic.

“Yeah, right.” I scoffed.

“That’s why everyone was speechless. They didn’t see you coming. Didn’t you hear the applause?”

“Yeah, I did.” When I thought about it, it did sound more than polite applause. It was better than the girl I followed. “But I won’t hold my breath. Grace and Jackie were great. If I didn’t sound totally lame compared to them, then I’m happy.”

“Then you should be thrilled.” He was sweet.

“Thanks.” I forced a quarter-smile.

“Hey, I’m not just trying to be nice here. Truth, remember?” His brows scrunched together and raised, trying to remind me of his promise.

“I remember. Thank you.” I relaxed a little and gave him a more appreciative smile.

“No problem.” He beamed.

“I need to get home. I’ll see you tomorrow. 2:00, right?”

“Yeah. 2:00.” He nodded.

As I drove home, I felt pretty good about my audition. I did the best I could. No one laughed, they seemed impressed. I didn’t need to get the solo to feel good about myself. Doing well today and hearing their appreciation for it was validating. I’d be lying to myself if I didn’t admit that it would be nice to get it. If I strived for something, I wanted to be the best at it. Some things you still couldn’t win even if you studied and practiced every hour of every day. That didn’t mean you didn’t want it, but sometimes reality had to sink in so you didn’t get your hopes up. Still, maybe I had a shot.

My parents weren’t home yet, when I pulled into my usual spot in front of my house. There was a man with a clipboard talking to my next door neighbor. Great, he was one of those annoying salespeople or political activists. Either way, I didn’t want anything to do with him.

I quickly grabbed my backpack and hopped out of the car. I was a third of the way to the door when the salesman intercepted me. Great, he had to realize I was a teenager and wasn’t going to buy anything or hire his business to do home repair.

“Elizabeth Mariposa?” The man asked.

How the hell did he know my name? That’s one hell of a sales list. Maybe he did know I couldn’t buy anything. I took several steps backward nervously. “Yes.”

“I have a letter for you.” He pulled an envelope from his clipboard. “Here you go. Have a nice day.” Then he left.

I had completed some scholarship applications. Maybe it was from one of them. I went to my room and heard the garage door open. Crap. My mom was home and I hadn’t started dinner. She was going to wonder why and I wasn’t about to tell her about the audition. I tossed the letter on my desk and ran to the kitchen. I had to get dinner started.

7. CARNIVAL

It was Saturday afternoon. I finished my chores as quickly as possible and got ready for the carnival. My dad went to the store and my mom was working in her garden in the backyard. At 1:55pm, the doorbell rang. I looked through the peephole and saw Patrick and his little brother. I opened the door.

“Hi, Liz.”

“Hi, Patrick. Come in.” I stepped aside to let them enter.

They walked inside. “Liz, this is my brother Andy. Andy, this is my friend Liz.”

“Hi!” Andy extended his hand.

I shook his hand. “It’s nice to meet you Andy.”

He smiled. Andy was a cute little seven-year-old with short sandy brown hair. He looked like a miniature version of Patrick. He seemed like a happy little kid. When I was his age and in a stranger’s house, I couldn’t stand there and smile. It was like he was taking everything in as an adventure.

“Would you mind saying ‘hi’ to my mom?” I asked.

“No. Of course not.” I didn’t think he would mind, he was far too polite.

“Thanks.” I led them to the backyard.

“Mom?” I called out.

“Yes,
Elizabeth
.” I heard her respond off to the side yard, near my room.

I led them over to the side of the house. My mom was watering the plants. I loved the location of my room. I had some lavender azaleas and rhododendrons hanging near my window and there was night-blooming jasmine just across from it near the fence. In the day, I would see hummingbirds come by to drink nectar from the hanging plants. In the evening, if I left my window open just a crack, the scent of the jasmine would carry into my room. If I had a bad day, it would usually make me feel a little better.

“Mom, Patrick and his brother are here.” I tried to keep my voice light but I could feel my heart starting to race in anxiety.

She turned to look at them, but kept watering. “Hello.
Elizabeth
, open your windows before you leave. I already watered those plants.” She pointed to the pots.

“Mom. This is Patrick and Andy.”

 
“Good afternoon, Mrs. Mariposa, it’s a pleasure to meet you.” He reached out to shake her hand.

She switched the hose from her right hand to her left and shook his hand. “Nice to meet you. You’re driving?”

“Yes, ma’am.” He stood there smiling with his arm around Andy.

She stared at him. I had a sinking feeling in my stomach, I knew that look in her eyes. “I think it’s nice that you are taking your brother to the carnival.”

“Thank you.”

She addressed Andy. “Is he a good big brother?”

“Yes, he is.” Andy beamed.

“Watches out for you?” She continued her interrogation. Good thing little kids were oblivious to such things.

“Yeah, all the time.” He proudly nodded. I could tell he adored Patrick.

She looked back at Patrick. “I trust you’ll watch out for
Elizabeth
like you do for your brother.”

And there it was. I was mortified. “Mom…”

Patrick simply answered, “Yes, ma’am.” Still polite and gentlemanly.

“Okay. Then you guys have fun.” That ended her interrogation of him. “
Elizabeth
, do you have enough money?”

“Yes, Mom.”

She reached into her pocket and handed me money. “Here.” She never listens to me, but when it comes to money, I’d gladly shut up and just take it. It was the least I deserved.

“Thanks.” I shoved the money into my pocket. “Bye.”

“Good-bye, Mrs. Mariposa. Don’t worry, Liz will be fine.” Patrick told her.

She nodded and turned back to tend to the plants. “Be at Leenie’s by 9:00pm. You need to at least make an appearance. Don’t forget to open your window. Let the air inside, or it will be stuffy in the house later.”

We walked back through the house. I couldn’t believe my mom questioned a second grader about Patrick’s responsibility. Then, she essentially told Patrick that he had to look after me like a little kid. Well, I guess I really wasn’t surprised. It was what I was dreading would happen.

“I’ll be right back.” I ran to my bedroom and opened the window. I hurried back to Patrick and Andy in the family room. I picked up my bag and sweatshirt. “Sorry about that. My mom…”

“Don’t worry about it. It’s okay.” He smiled. His hand moved downward as if he was swatting the air. “Forget about it.”

“Easier said than done.” I whispered as I locked the door behind us.

We got to Patrick’s car. He opened the front passenger door for me and I got in and sat down.

He started his car, “So, who’s ready for fun?”

“I am!” Andy shouted from the back seat. It startled me. I wasn’t expecting such an enthusiastic response.

“What about you, Liz?” Andy asked.

“Huh? Oh, yeah. I’m ready.” I forced a smile. Fun. That which continues to elude me. Maybe the energetic seven-year-old in the back could teach me something.

“Now, Andy…Can you believe that Liz has never been to a carnival before?”

“Never?” Andy was so surprised. You’d think he’d just heard that I’d never tried chocolate.

“No, I haven’t.” I shook my head.

“So, it’ll be up to us to show her how much fun it is.” Patrick’s voice was filled with brotherly love.

“Do you think you’re up to it, Andy?” I challenged him.

“Oh yeah!” Andy was excited.

I wondered where his enthusiasm would take us first. “Okay, so what’s the first thing we should do when we get there?”

“Umm…” A mischievous grin appeared on Andy’s face. “The bumper cars!”

“How did I know you’d pick that?” Patrick teased him.

“’Cause it’s my favorite!”