Fever (12 page)
ELLA
Watching
Dirty Dancing
with Cole was the best. I didn’t know why it was better than any other time in particular, but I loved having him there. I kept sneaking glances at him, loving the way his lips twitched with a grin. His eyes were totally transfixed on the final dance...the best end to a movie ever.
As the credits rolled, he turned my way. “You know, when my mom used to watch this, she'd always rewind the end and watch the dance again.”
“Well, it's
Dirty Dancing
, that's what you're supposed to do.”
With a quiet chuckle, he reached for the remote and did just that. When Patrick Swayze walked into the room, Cole's head whipped toward me, his right eyebrow arching.
“No one puts Baby in the corner,” he said in a deep voice.
A loud laugh exploded from my lips, giggles rippling through my body. They kind of hurt, but I couldn't help it. Cole was so easy to be around. I didn’t like being around people I barely knew when I felt this sick, but Cole was so relaxed and easy to be with. The movie came to an end, and I pressed my lips together, resisting the urge to sing.
“So what other kinds of movies do you like?” Cole patted my leg.
I wanted him to rest his hand there; it felt like the natural thing to do, but he moved it, and I had to look away so he wouldn't spot my disappointment. “Everything. I love movies...except horror or any realistic torture or anything like that.”
“A softie. I thought so.” He winked at me.
“How about you?”
“Yep, love them. I'll watch anything. My dad was a total movie freak; he had the biggest collection of DVDs. We used to do Friday movie night...every Friday. Mom would make the popcorn, Dad and I would shift the living room around, put a big mattress on the floor with a ton of pillows. It was awesome.” His voice grew soft and distant, and then he took in a deep breath and smiled at me. “It was one thing I really held on to. I was moved from one place to another and my best friends were my computer and Dad's massive box of DVDs. I just used to hide in my room and watch whenever I was home.”
“I'm guessing that's a lot of screen time.”
“Yeah, Nina put an end to that pretty quickly.” He chuckled. “I hated her for it at first, but she told me she was doing it because she really cared about me. I remember screaming at her about family movie night and just going ballistic before storming out of the house.”
“You ran away?”
“Yeah, but the cops brought me back that night. Found me sitting on a street corner. A fourteen-year-old little shit with attitude to burn.”
My heart squeezed, imagining the pain he must have been going through.
“But...” Cole lightly slapped his knee. “That Friday when I got home from school, Nina was down in the bar setting up the chairs in rows. They were facing this big screen at the back of the room.” He grinned. “For the next three years, Quigg's had a movie night every Friday, and I was allowed to pick the movie...every week.”
My eyes were glistening when he turned to face me. His smile was broad and heartfelt.
“Those two saved my life, you know.”
“Just like Morgan and Jody saved mine.”
“I guess we are among the lucky, aren't we?”
“As far as orphans go, I suppose.”
My melancholy comment dropped an awkward silence into the room that I had to remedy. Cole's distracting presence was the perfect antidote to my stomach pain, and I really didn't want him to go.
Sitting up, I nestled the pillow behind my back and hugged my knees to my chest. “Top Ten Friday night movies. Go.”
His face lit with a smile, before he threw his head back. “I can only choose ten?”
I chuckled. “First ten you think of.”
The next hour whittled away as we talked movies. His Top Ten was pretty awesome and I kept adding to it. It soon became a Top Twenty and then morphed into a Top Fifty. The conversation then veered toward TV and books. Laughter and teasing peppered our chatter, which occasionally grew soft with painful reminders from the past. Talking to him so openly was easy, because I knew he got it. I didn't delve into all my fears or anything, but I could sense he read between the lines when I told him a story or two. I certainly read his book and it told me a lot.
We both jumped when the door jiggled open, and I glanced at the clock. My eyes bulged. Cole had been here for hours.
Morgan stepped in and glanced our way, surprise flickering over her features before she pulled herself together.
“Hey.” Her grin bounced from me to Cole. “You come to get those headphones?” She winked.
Cole blushed.
I frowned.
What was the deal with the headphones?
I shuffled back on the couch, moving away from Cole. I hadn't even noticed when I inched forward. We were practically in each other's laps.
Cole cleared his throat and rose off the cushions, pulling his shirt straight.
“Ah, yeah. Headphones would be great. Thanks, Morgan.”
“Let me grab them for you.” She dumped her purse and clipped into her room.
Cole wouldn't look at me while we waited. Instead he crossed his arms, visibly awkward. I felt the loss keenly, my stomach pains returning with force now that I wasn't distracted.
I grimaced, clutching my waist and hoping Cole wouldn't notice.
Morgan stepped back into the room and he jumped around the couch.
“Here you go.” She held them out, along with a memory stick. “This is the mix I used to listen to.” She laughed.
What were they talking about? I really wanted to know but didn't want to ask. They looked like they were sharing some private joke. Envy spiked through me, making me scowl as I nibbled on my thumbnail.
Cole took the memory stick. “What's on there?”
“Just a mix of
rockbands and stuff. A little Chili Peppers, some Def Leppard, White Stripes.”
“Ah, old school.”
“Yeah,” she chuckled. “But there's also some Green Day, Simple Plan, Good Charlotte, Black Eyed Peas, a little Pitbull. It's a real mix.”
“You've got pretty eclectic tastes.”
Morgan grinned. “Yeah, I love all kinds of music.”
I wanted to pipe up that I did too
, but kept my lips sealed. I wanted Cole to think I was cool, and I hardly thought admitting my love affair with Ella Fitzgerald music was going to help. Morgan always teased me for being born in the wrong era, which was why I'd never told David how much I loved to sing jazz. No, the only person who'd ever heard me do that with confidence was my shower man, who I now had no chance with thanks to my quick dismissal yesterday morning...not that I wanted a chance with him.
Argh! This was so freaking confusing.
I ran my hands through my hair, trying to forget my shower buddy, but the scene before me was hardly a pleasant distraction. Watching Morgan and Cole chuckle over her taste in music stung. I hated that it did. I was so frickin' immature. This spike of jealousy was real, and it bothered the heck out of me.
I was with David. Hello!
How was it possible to like three different guys at the same time?
David. David. David. David.
I crossed my arms tight across my chest, determined to squash my anarchic feelings into submission. This was ridiculous. I had a gorgeous boyfriend who loved me. I made him happy. He needed me...and that was a nice feeling.
Reaching for my phone, I checked the screen. Blank. He was obviously still working. Antsy for a distraction, I stood from the couch, intending to go to my room and read while Cole and Morgan giggled over music. I didn't have to sit here and watch them.
The blanket fell from my knees as I turned to grab my pillow and then my body betrayed me.
Pain seared through my middle, making me buckle over, dots flashing before my eyes. I squeezed my eyes against the fuzz. Oh crap!
“Ella.” Morgan's hand was on my back in an instant. “Sweetie, what's wrong?”
A little whine squeaked from my throat.
“She ate some wheat last night,” Cole said.
“Oh no.” Morgan rubbed my back. “What do you need?”
I groaned. “The bathroom.”
Stumbling past her, I used the couch as a crutch until I ran out of it. Cole's strong arm grabbed me, wrapping around my waist. This was so humiliating.
“I'm okay.” I tried to stand and brush him off, but he wouldn't have it. His arm remained around me all the way down the hall. Morgan walked quietly behind us and I wanted to die.
One, because my stomach was protesting in loud, growling rumbles. Cole knew the second I got into that bathroom, my body was going to erupt, and it wasn't going to be pretty.
Two, his arm felt divine.
Cole swung the door open for me and stepped back.
“I'm good.” I held out my hand when Morgan tried to step in and guide me to a stall. I stumbled my way to the end of the row and shakily locked myself inside, only just making it.
Tears popped from my eyes as I pressed my elbows into my knees. I had to be more careful.
“Side salads, just stick with the side salads,” I whimpered.
Resting my head in my hands, I let out a long, slow sigh and sniffed.
I had to be more careful, and this time, I wasn't thinking about food.
*****
I shuffled back to my room about twenty minutes later. My stomach felt like it'd been put through a blender. Closing the door behind me, I leaned against the wood and shut my eyes.
“You okay, hun?” Morgan looked up from her magazine, giving me a sympathetic smile.
“Is he gone?”
“Yeah, he left as soon as you did.”
“Okay. Good.” I nodded, hunching over and weakly making my way to the couch. I slumped onto it. Morgan's hand gently pushed my shoulder until my head was resting on her knee. I closed my eyes, enjoying the feel of her cool hand on my forehead.
When my eyes crept back open, I noticed that the TV was all cued
up, the first shot from
The Notebook
paused on screen.
“I love you,” I whispered.
“I know.”
She grinned down at me and reached for the remote. Before pressing play, her dark eyes hit me. “You want to talk about Cole?”
“Why would I want to talk about Cole?” I shifted my head on her lap, honing in on the screen so I wouldn't have to look at her.
“Ella, he's a really nice guy who just spent most of the day looking after you.”
I swallowed. “Yeah, he is a really good guy.”
“And David's best friend.” Morgan rubbed her hand over my tense shoulder.
“Which is why I don't want to talk about him.”
“You know—”
“Press play, Morgan.”
She paused. I could feel her gaze on me, but I refused to look away from the screen. After a beat too long, she finally huffed out a soft breath, and whispered, “Pressing play.”
The music swelled as the camera spanned over a quiet estuary, the sun rising in the distance. I loved this movie. I loved that a couple who were destined to be together made it, in spite of everything stacked against them. It was like they were addicted to each other, pulled together by a force outside of themselves. I wondered what a love like that felt like.
It scared me to think that maybe I already knew.
COLE
Everything was now totally messed up.
After making my big decision to get over girls and focus on my business plan, I had to go and spend the day with Ella, who in spite of her obvious pain managed to laugh and talk to me all day. She'd been so easy to chat to, her animated eyes lighting when we spoke about movies. She was a total romantic; I could see that in her right away. Man, I'd love to show her just how romantic I could be.
But I couldn't.
Damn it. It was so frickin' unfair.
I ambled through Millennium Park, glancing at Cloud Gate as I walked by. I didn't stop at the huge
, shiny kidney bean this time, but I couldn't help slowing my pace to admire it. It was pretty cool. Chicago had some awesome artwork displayed for the tourists. People gathered around it, gazing up at their warped reflections. I remembered doing that with Malachi one day. We'd laughed our asses off.
Shoving my hands into my jacket pockets, I kept walking. I had no particular destination this weekend; I just knew I wanted to get out. I wasn't due at Quigg's until this evening, and I didn't want to spend the day hanging around campus.
Since Ella had arrived, David and I had hardly hung out at all, but that was my fault, not his. He kept inviting me to join them, but it was just too damn hard.
It had been a week since I'd sat by Ella's side and talked the day away. I wanted a repeat, but the opportunity had never presented itself and it probably shouldn't anyway. She wasn't mine and never would be
; I just had to face it.
I had managed one quick phone call. I'd actually started with Morgan, checking in with her to see how Ella was doing. I'd spent most of Sunday night stressing about her and the pain flashing over her face as I helped her to the bathroom. Morgan told me she had been fine by the morning but gave me her number anyway. It took me until the afternoon to give Ella a call.
“Hello, Ella speaking.” Her voice was like the pink frosting on a cupcake.
“Hey, it's um, Cole. I hope you don't mind. Morgan gave me your number.”
Her pause made my stomach coil. “No, that's—that's great. How are you?”
I chuckled. “Me? I'm fine. How are you?”
Another pause. This time I could picture her cheeks heating with color as she bit her lower lip. “I'm all good now. Thank you for yesterday. You made it much easier for me to get through.”
“Anytime. I had fun.”
“Me too.”
There was an awkward beat. I thought of a million ways to fill it, but instead pressed my lips together. “Well, I'm glad you're okay. You take care.”
“You too. Thanks for calling, Cole.”
Man, I loved my name on her lips.
“See you 'round, Ella.”
But I hadn't. I hadn't seen her all week and no matter how badly I wanted to call her again, I couldn't.
With a scowl, I hunched my shoulders against the wind and pressed forward, considering the idea of stopping for lunch soon. I thought about heading to Quigg’s to hang out with Frankie. I was very aware he was living alone with Nina and Malachi, and he'd probably enjoy a little younger company for the afternoon. We could have some chow and then chuck a baseball around, or he could beat my ass at that new PS3 game he got for his birthday. Strider or something?
I nodded, liking that idea and turning north. But I couldn't move forward, because a pretty little thing was standing in my line of sight.
A slow smile formed on my face as I changed direction and headed toward Ella. Her delicate fingers were pinching her chin as she looked at her phone and then back up, doing a slow spin.
“You look lost.”
She jerked at my quiet statement and spun around with a chuckle. Rolling her eyes, she shook her head and let out a bashful snicker. “I am. My sense of direction really sucks.”
She was so adorable. I wanted to wrap her in a hug. I knew how she felt against me now, having practically carried her to the bathroom. Man, I'd do anything to experience that again. Not the Ella
-being-sick part, but the me-helping-her-when-she-needed-me, part. My protective instincts had been on overdrive and I kind of liked it.
I cleared my throat and looked at her phone. “Where are you trying to get to?”
She passed me the phone. “Some restaurant that David loves. It's Italian, I think? It's on...”
“Oh yeah, Guiddo's.” I passed the phone back without really having to look at it. “He loves that place. Come on, I'll show you the way.”
“Really? Are you sure?”
“Of course.” I smiled down at her.
She shone me a ray of sunshine and slipped her phone back into her coat pocket. “Thank you. He's having lunch with Mitch and Charlene and invited me last minute.”
Guiddo's wasn't far from Millennium Park, so I didn't hurry. I had been enjoying my ambling pace and with Ella beside me, I was enjoying it even more. The tension seemed to drain from her the second she saw me and I was glad for it
; being lost did suck.
“It's not far from here, about a block away.”
“Okay, so I was sort of close.” She shrugged. “I was trying to save my pennies and use the bus instead of a taxi. I got off a couple of stops too early and then walked this way and just totally didn't know where I was.”
“Don't worry about it. Chicago's a big city
; it's easy to get lost here.”
“You seem to know your way around.”
“I've been living here a tad longer than you. Put me in the middle of L.A. and I'd be lost in two seconds.”
She chuckled. “Put
me
in the middle of L.A. and I'd be lost in two seconds.”
I loved the way she could tease herself, and I had to fight the urge to lean down and kiss her.
She let out a little whine. “I hate that I'm like this, but God just forgot to give me a compass when I was born.”
I smiled down at her. “Let me guess, your mom used to tell you that, right?”
She blushed. “My dad. He was always coming up with stuff like that.”
We fell into silence, and I wanted to slow my pace even more. Guiddo's wasn't far and I wasn't done.
Although I should have been. Hell, I should probably have been walking her there as fast as I could.
“So, what are you planning on doing after you graduate?”
Her question caught me off-guard.
“I, um, have a few ideas.” I shrugged. I didn't really discuss my future plans with anyone other
than Nina and Malachi. There were too many dream-squashers out there, and I didn’t want to be put off.
“What are they?” Ella's keen eyes were so endearing, I broke the rules and turned her left instead of walking straight ahead. I figured I could get away with walking the long way around the block. It'd buy me ten more minutes of her undivided attention, and with her whacky sense of direction…I felt confident she’d remain unaware of my sneaky ploy to spend more time with
her.
“Well…
” I ran my hand through my hair. “I, uh, am quite keen on opening up a pub, kinda like Quigg's, but on the South Side, so I can cater to the UChicago crowd.”
Ella's eyes sparkled and her mouth dropped open. “That is such a cool idea. Will you have bands come and play?”
“Yeah.” I nodded, her enthusiasm making my insides tingle. “I really want it to be a place for indie bands to showcase their work.”
“Music students would love you! You could make it a place for them to perform and buskers, you could have them coming in too, earning a few bucks. They'd love it.” Her hands spread wide, her eyes continuing to dance.
“That's what I was thinking, and then students come and hang out there. It'd be like a watering hole for them.”
“Cafe feel during the day, pub at night.”
“Exactly.”
“I love it.”
I couldn't hide my astonishment. Her reaction to my idea was epic and made me wonder if I should have been telling more people...but not David. The guy was so practical, he'd tear holes through it in a second.
“Can you not mention anything to David
?” I winced.
“Why? Because his practicality would have your amazing dream deflated within about two seconds?” She winked and then grimaced, dropping her gaze. “Sorry, I shouldn't have said that. The world needs practical people.”
“Yes it does, but it also needs encouragers.” I nudged her gently with my elbow.
She looked at me with a blushing smile that did my heart in.
“You know, I'm really glad I told you. I don't often talk about my future plans.”
“I get that. It's hard to make dreams come true.” She swallowed.
“What are your dreams?”
I studied her carefully as her nose scrunched and she bit her lip. A breath shot out of her mouth as she chuckled and shook her head. “I don't...” She shrugged. “David's got lots
of great plans for us. He wants to get his law degree and eventually open up a practice of his own. We'll get a nice house somewhere and have a family.”
“Ye-ah,” I said slowly. “But what do you want? I mean, what do you want to do with your life?”
She wouldn't look at me. Her eyes skimmed the street ahead as her mouth opened and closed. “I don't...” She sighed and finally looked up at me. “I'm studying literature. I guess I'll finish that up and maybe go into teaching or something until I become a mother.” None of those things looked to thrill her, and I couldn't help a frown. “To be honest, I haven't given it much thought. I just tend to focus on one week at a time, not a year in advance, you know what I mean?” Her chuckle was forced.
“Huh.” Her comments worried me. I knew they shouldn't. It was none of my business. David's goals were obviously driving her too, but...
I cleared my throat, unwilling to just let it rest. “Does any of that stuff excite you?”
She shrugged and gave a pitiful nod. I wasn't buying it.
“I just think it's really important to have something that drives you in life...something to look forward to. What kind of stuff makes you zing?”
“Makes me zing?” She tittered.
“Yeah, what makes you happy? Like, really happy. You know, like when your heart just wants to burst out of your chest and fly through the sky.”
Her smile was soft, her gaze enchanted by my words. I locked eyes with her and time froze until her forehead wrinkled and she looked away from me.
“Oh, Guiddo's.” She pointed across the street and I spotted David sitting at one of the front tables by the window.
I tried to hide the sadness swamping me and forced a smile, but she wasn't looking at me anyway. Clearing my throat yet again, I pressed the button on the traffic lights. “David is amazing at analyzing things. He's a smart guy. Maybe I should tell him about my plans.”
“Oh definitely. Yeah, he is.” Ella's gaze popped up and she nodded, pressing her lips together. “Once you have your business plan all set and as hole-proof as possible, you should run it by him.” She smiled at me. “I'll back you up. I think it's awesome.”
“Thank you.”
Her beautiful eyes held me steady as we waited for the lights to change. I could have gazed down at her all day, but the little red man turned green and we were forced to cross.
David saw us coming and jumped from his seat, meeting us at the door.
“I was about to call you.” He wrapped Ella in his arms and kissed her cheek. “Hey, man.” He smiled at me over her shoulder. “Want to join us?”
I knew I should have probably refused and headed to Quigg's, but I didn't want to leave her. Instead I decided to torture myself by following them through the restaurant and pulling out a chair. David's hand rubbed Ella's back as she greeted David's friends, Mitch and Charlene, and then reached for a menu.
I watched her from the corner of my eye. A little frown flickered over her features as she scanned the contents. It wasn't an angry frown; it was more disappointment than anything and I wondered why. Scanning my own menu, I soon figured it out.
Pasta, pizza, bread, flour, wheat, gluten, gluten, gluten.
I shot her a sympathetic smile and she wrinkled her nose, shaking her head slightly.