Figure 8 (8 page)

“What are you thinking?”

“Do you ever stop being a shrink?” I giggle

“Like I said old habits,” he shrugs. “I can usually read people really well but you Isabelle, are a mystery. You close yourself off so much to the outside world that the act you put on appears like the real you. But I know it’s not you.” He must see the confusion in my eyes, as he doesn’t give me the chance to question him. “You act like everything is fine, like you’re the happiest person in the world. I have seen you when you are working, I watched you when you were with your friends, but I know that’s not how you really feel.” It’s a statement not a question.

“I have my up days and I have my down days. Right at this moment in time my happiness is genuine.” I pause and take a deep breath “But yes you are right, I do put on a front, but it’s because I genuinely do want to be happy. Do you think I like being the way I am?” I sigh. “I know I need help, I just hope you can help me and not break my heart?” I look down as I say the last sentence.

“I can’t promise this is going to work, you are still my patient and this shouldn’t have happened.” I go to stand up off the bed “Wait, let me finish.” I sit on the edge of the bed not looking at him. “No, it shouldn’t have happened, but I can’t stay away from you. We can try and make it work that’s all I can promise.” I turn and smile at him, he pulls me down so I am flat on my back and he leans over me, I feel his erection digging into my thigh.

He can’t seriously be ready to go again? The man is insatiable.

“You really are so sexy, you know that right?”

“You’re not too bad yourself,” I laugh. He leans down and kisses me as the tip of his erection teases my entrance. I am so ready for him again. I don’t think I will ever get enough of this man.

I open one eye, squinting as the light shines into the room. My head is pounding like someone took a hammer to it last night. Hmm, last night. It’s amazing how much can change in the space of a week. Last week I was so alone, so frightened, so unhappy and then I met this hunk of a man and my whole world has turned on its axis. It’s like my mood has done a complete one eighty, I feel alive again and it’s Damon that has made me feel this way. He has evoked feelings inside of me that I didn’t even know existed. The multiple orgasms that I achieved over the course of the night obviously had an affect on the way I feel too. I have never had that many orgasms in one night before; actually I don’t think I have had that many orgasms in my life before, even when I was faking them. I look over at sleeping beauty next to me and smile, before slowly getting up so not to wake him. My bladder feels like it’s about to burst if I don’t make it to the bathroom soon. I make my way across the room noticing how deliciously sore I am down below. I grin remembering all the different ways Damon fucked me last night.

I finish up on the toilet and look at myself in the mirror, I look terrible, the man will run a mile when he sees me like this. I head out to the living area to retrieve my bag; I rummage around for a hairbrush and a bit of makeup to make myself look a bit more presentable. I check my phone,
Shit!
I have 12 missed called and 5 text messages, some from Jack and the rest from Jenny. I send a quick reply to them both letting them know that I’m alive and that the maniac psychiatrist has not killed me. Slipping it back into my bag I make my way back to the bathroom, I quickly make myself look slightly better before brushing my teeth with Damon’s toothbrush.

As I head back into the bedroom Damon is sat up in bed staring at me with a grin on his face bigger than the Cheshire cat.

“Good morning,” I smile back with a grin just as big as his.

“Good morning yourself beautiful.” My insides melt at his words.

How can he be real? Maybe you’re having a psychotic episode Izzy!

“Where have you been? Get your sexy little arse back in this bed right this min….” I don’t hesitate one second. I’m across the room and into bed before he can finish his sentence. I lie down and he is on me, feathering kisses all over me. Oh how thankful I am that I brushed my teeth. Morning breath is the worst, but somehow Damon still smells yummy. I just love his smell.

“What are your plans for today?” It’s Sunday, Shit, I have work this afternoon.

“I have to… Ahh… work today.” He continues sucking and biting my breasts as I try to answer him.

“Wrong answer.”

Eh? What’s he mean, wrong answer?

“You’re staying” Bite. “In bed.” Suck. “With me.” Bite. “All day,” he answers my silent thought.

“I would love to…ohh… stay… ahh, but I can’t have more time off work.” I reach for his face grabbing it in both hands and lift it up to look at me. His eyes have a wicked glint to them; he continues circling my nipples with his fingers and gently tugs on them. He gives me his best puppy dog eyes and I let go. He immediately goes back to work on my nipples, moving gradually down my stomach, all the way down to my already wet pussy.

After breakfast, which basically consisted of me, me and more me, Damon finally let me go home. He dropped me off and gave me a lingering kiss, asking if he could see me again tonight. I left, promising to text him when I got a break to let him know my plans. I head into the apartment, hoping that Jenny has already gone to work. I really don’t want the third degree about going home with a stranger, although technically he isn’t really a stranger. I hear noises as soon as I step through the door. I tip toe quietly towards the breakfast bar, place my bag on it and then head into the bathroom. I know these noises, I’ve heard them many times before, and they mean only one thing. Jenny, is not alone.

Yet, I bet she still gives me the third degree about last night.

I smile to myself remembering all the things Damon and I have done over the last 12 hours. I jump in the shower and let the spray take over me. I wash my hair, get out and wrap myself in my bathrobe, wrapping a towel round my head. I head into my bedroom and collapse onto the bed in exhaustion. I have 2 hours before I need to be in work, I should really have a nana nap before then.

It’s so dark.

I can’t see anything.

I start to walk around but my feet won’t move.

I’m stuck.

I feel claustrophobic.

I start to panic.

My breathing is becoming more and more rabid.

A light flickers on and then dims and I see I am up high in a sterile white room, I peer down.

I know this feeling, it has haunted me for years, and I know where I am.

I’m back on the number 8.

I feel paralysed with fear.

I hear footsteps coming towards me.

This is new.

A shadow appears on the walls.

It gets bigger as it gets closer and my throat swells that tiny bit more with each step closer.

I can’t breathe.

I’m suffocating.

Someone help.

Please help me!

“Izzy, Izzy please wake up.” I hear Jenny’s voice, my eyes flicker open and concerned green eyes stare back at me. “Izzy you were screaming and you stopped breathing. You scared me to death.” My throat feels raw. I scramble out of bed and try to get my bearings.

“I had the dream again but it was different this time, there was someone else in the room.” Tears spring from my eyes and I feel them slipping down my cheeks. Jenny, holds me tightly, soothing me.

“Shh babe, it was just a dream.”

“But it felt so real,” I sniff. “I was in such a panic, I was scared and I couldn’t breathe or move. I didn’t see who the person was but I had the feeling that they were there to hurt me.” Jenny knows the routine when I have these dreams, she knows it takes me a while to calm down. But this is the first time I have had it since I was in the hospital and it was so much worse than ever before. She holds me at arm’s length and looks into my eyes.

“It was just a dream, you’re safe, you’re home with me and no one is here to hurt you. Maybe you should speak to the hot shrink when you have your appointment with him tomorrow?”

“Oh god no, I can’t tell him about this, he must already think I’m a freak with the whole suicide shit without piling more crap at him.”

“Seriously, the guy took you home with him last night. I don’t know the sordid details but I’m sure you will divulge later,” she says with a wink. “He knows exactly who you are and what has happened to you, and still he hasn’t run a mile in the other direction. I’m pretty sure a few dreams aren’t going to scare him off,” she laughs lightly. It’s then that I notice that she is completely naked from the bottom up.

“What the hell?” I screech, as I look her up and down. “Why are you half naked?” I burst into laughter at the sight of her. She doesn’t look ashamed in the least.

“Your screaming kinda interrupted my date,” she says with a smirk.

“Jennifer Campbell, you’re such a fucking hussy!” she snorts brazenly.

“Says you,” she looks me up and down. “Purlease don’t try to deny that you didn’t get some last night.” I am pretty sure that my face is now the same shade as a cherry.

“A lady doesn’t kiss and tell,” I say with a wink.

“You, my dear friend are not a lady,” she calls as she leaves the room with a spring in her step. “Catch ya later chick. Loves ya,” She shouts from the hallway. I glance at my clock, oh crap. I have to be in work in half an hour. I quickly rush to the bathroom grateful that I had a shower earlier. I sort my hair and face out, throw my clothes on and I’m out the door in less than fifteen minutes.

Who says it takes a woman forever to get ready?

Work flies by pretty fast and I can’t help but smile my way through my shift. The effects of my dream slowly abate throughout the night and all I can think about is Damon. I am missing him, it’s totally crazy. I’ve known the man for all of five minutes but I want to be near him all of the time. Jack of course harasses me continuously about what happened with Damon but I stay tight lipped. Of course all it takes is for me to ask him about his night and I am completely forgotten about. He tells me all about the man Jen hooked up with and I learn that he has a younger brother who Jack hooked up with. Their names are Jared and Josh, Jared being the younger of the two, and the man that was making the noises in my apartment. Jack informs me that they are all going out for drinks on Tuesday night and invites Damon and I along.

I sent a text to Damon just before my shift started, but I have been so mad busy that I haven’t had chance to check my phone. When I finally get a break, I rush to my locker and grab my bag. After rummaging around for what feels like minutes I locate my phone and breathe a sigh of relief when I see a text message and two missed calls, all from Damon. My insides jump for joy seeing his name light up on my screen
.

Message received 7.50pm

Sender: Damon.

I miss you beautiful, please tell me I can pick you up from work? D xx

My heart literally stops beating for a second.

I write a quick reply.

Message Sent 9.30pm

Sender: Isabelle.

I miss you too. Is that crazy? I will be finished at 11.15 on the dot. Can’t wait to see you. Got to go back to work now. See you soon Iz xx

I shove my phone back into my bag and head back into the packed bar. I hadn’t planned on seeing him tonight but it would seem that I just couldn’t keep away. At 11.10pm, I notice the white Range Rover pull up outside of the bar. My stomach flutters like there are a million tiny butterflies flying around inside it.

“Hey Iz, that hot piece of arse you went home with last night is here,” Jack shouts across the bar. Thankfully the bar is almost empty, only a few of our regulars are left and a couple of the staff. I turn and shoot him my best ‘
you fucking bitch
’ stare, then walk embarrassedly towards the staff room. Sue is sat at the table drinking a coffee and reading something on a sheet of paper.

“Is it okay if I shoot now please, Sue?” It is my clocking off time but I always ask just in case she needs any help locking up.

“Yeah, sure sweetie. Go on home, we can manage from here,” she smiles, looking up from her paperwork. I thank her and tell her I will see her tomorrow afternoon. I grab my bag and coat out of my locker and head out. I give Jack a peck on the cheek as I walk past then punch him in the ribs.

“Hey! What was that for?” he shrieks and bends over feigning pain.

“Nothing more than you deserve,” I wink at him. “See you tomorrow sweet cheeks,” I holler, as I head out of the door.

As I step out into the cool spring air, I hear the choral tones of ‘Adagio for Strings’ pulsing out from the Range Rover. I am instantly aware of Damon watching me, all of the hairs on the back of my neck stand on end and all my nerves start to tingle. I suddenly feel nervous as I open the car door and see his beautiful face beaming at me.

“Hi,” it’s almost a whisper. I see him smile and it’s the most beautiful sight I have seen all night. I jump up into the passenger seat and reach around to get my belt. As I go to turn he grabs me by the arm and pulls me into him. He captures my mouth in a devouring kiss that rocks me to my core. Everything is tingling as I kiss him back with every ounce of passion that I have inside me. When he pulls away I feel wistful. He cups my face in his hands and looks into my eyes.

“I have missed this face.” He kisses my cheek. “I have missed these lips.” He kisses my mouth. “I have missed this neck.” He kisses my neck. “And I have most definitely missed these babies.” He smirks, as he runs his fingers over my nipples. “Let me take you to my place!” It’s not a question, more a statement. I just nod my head unable to find the words to answer him. I blush at his words, it’s amazing how comfortable he is around me. We drive in silence as the CD player skips from one song to another. When Johnny Cash’s ‘Hurt’ comes on Damon flinches before leaning over and turning it off.

“How was work?” he finally speaks.

“Yeah, it was good. It went pretty quick which is always a good thing.”

Are we really making small talk?

He nods as we pull up to the car park of his apartment and for the first time I feel scared. Not scared of Damon, but scared of what will happen to me if he decides he no longer wants to see me. I am fragile enough as it is and I’m not sure that my heart can take any more pain. He gets out of the car and before I can even think about getting out myself, he is around my side opening the door for me. He holds my hand to help me out and keeps tight hold as we walk through the building and into his apartment.

It is just how I remembered it last night.

Was it really only last night? It feels like a lifetime ago.

“Can I take your coat for you?” I slip it off and hand it to him with a grateful smile. “Drink?” he asks as he walks towards the kitchen.

“What do you have?”

“Pepsi, coffee, tea, wine, vodka, water.”

“I will have a wine please.” He pours the wine into two glasses and walks over towards where I have situated myself on one of the sofas.

Why does this feel so awkward when last night it felt so right? And why am I asking so many questions? I need to relax and let it just flow. Everything will be just fine.

He hands me my wine, I take a sip and let the cool crisp liquid run down my throat. My insides warm instantly and I feel more relaxed. I turn towards him as he sits himself down on the sofa next to me.

“I have a question,” I start. “How is this going to work between us? I have an appointment with you tomorrow as my shrink. Don’t you think it’s going to be a bit awkward?” He turns to look me in the eye.

“Isabelle, If you want to speak to someone else then I can recommend a colleague of mine. I won’t be offended, I promise. I will try to remain professional at work. I may be your…lover?” He looks pained when he says the word and I am stunned by this admission. It was a question but he doesn’t wait for me to correct him on what we are. I mean, I don’t even know myself what we are or what any of this is. “But I also help people and at this very moment you’re more important to me than any patient ever has been or will be.” I try to lower my head but he reaches up and clasps my chin to stop me.

“From the first moment I laid eyes on you I felt like all my Christmases and birthdays had come at once. You don’t see it, do you? You don’t see the pureness in your eyes, the beauty of your soul. You don’t see yourself how I see you.
You
see this scared broken young lady that has never had anyone to help fix her. I see a person who has been through hell and who is still standing and still fighting. A person who has lived her life grieving for a parent that she lost way too soon for anyone. But you know what else I see Isabelle?” I can barely breathe as he is making his speech. I gaze into his eyes, totally lost in the moment. “I see someone who is strong, but they don’t know it. I see someone who can live a happy and passionate life. I see beauty and fear etched in those amazing blue eyes. I want to be the person who mends your broken heart. I want to be the person who puts the spark back into those beautiful eyes. I want to be the person who makes your life worth living, so that you never have to feel alone ever again. So that you never get so low that you want to leave this earth. I want to give you life, and I want to be the one to show you how to live it.”

Never have I ever had someone speak to me with such reverence. I open my mouth to reply but nothing comes out. I’m beginning to look like frickin fish as I open and close my mouth. Instead I grab him by the neck and I take his lips. I kiss him like my life depends on it. He slips his tongue inside and I taste it licking and sucking. He moves down my chin, down my neck and kisses that sweet spot just behind my ear.

“I want you to save me,” I breathe. He lifts me up off the sofa in one fluid movement and walks towards the kitchen. He places me onto the worktop and slowly removes my clothes. Lifting my t-shirt up over my head, he stands back and admires my black lace bra, which barely covers my already erect nipples. I shift my bum as he starts pulling my leggings off shuffling until he gets them down revealing the matching black lace knickers. The desire in his eyes is breath taking. Passion oozes off every inch of him and I am instantly ready for him to take me.