Finding Divine (5 page)

Simon drove home feeling content. He couldn’t get his mind off Jessica and how deeply connected he felt with her after such a short acquaintance.  Normally when he went to the shore, he wanted to be alone, to rest and recharge, but with Jessica there he’d be on his toes. Though it was still early he hoped Jessica was receptive to exploring the possibilities of a relationship. Simon was certainly up for it.

While he intended to keep his word and be a complete gentleman if that’s what she wanted, Simon couldn’t help but imagine what her lips tasted like. Would they be as sweet as her? How would she respond to his kisses? Would she softly moan into his mouth as he slid his tongue past her plump lips? Just thinking about it made his dick stir. “Settle down, boy,” he sighed.

His cell phone rang through the blue tooth system in his car. His dashboard displayed blocked number. Against his better judgment, he pressed the button on his dash to answer the call. Maybe it was Pete calling from a phone at the shop. “This is Simon.”

“Son, I hope I’m not catching you at an inconvenient time, but I was just calling to—”

“It’s never a convenient time for you to call. So what’s the emergency?” he asked curtly, cutting his father off. This was his penalty for answering the phone without knowing who the caller was.

A long sigh followed on the other end of the line. “I thought I’d call to see how you’re doing today.”

“That’s hardly an emergency. I would rather you stick to our agreement of not contacting me unless there’s an actual emergency. Obviously I’m fine since I answered the phone. I probably wouldn’t have even done that had I known it was you. But now I know better than to answer a blocked number.”

“Simon, don’t make this harder than it already it,” Harold Lange said with heaviness in his voice.

“Make it easy on you? Kind of how you made it so easy on me most of my life?”

“Your mother would like to see you some time. Whatever you may feel about me, you shouldn’t take it out on her.”

It didn’t go unnoticed how his father managed to sidestep his own misdeeds, and to follow it up with a request took a lot of gall. “Are you serious? Would you by any chance be referring to the same mother who had more love for keeping up appearances and her lifestyle than for her own son? The same mother who stood by and let you run me down for no apparent reason. Uh, I’ll pass on that invitation, thank you.”

“You’re not being fair, Simon. There were things you don’t understand. If you give me the opportunity, I’d like to explain. I owe you that much at least.”

Simon snorted in disgust. “There were many nights I lay awake trying to figure out why the two of you treated me the way you did, but now I no longer care. Your explanation is unnecessary and unwanted.”

“She misses you…I do, too. I think we need each other especially now since…”

“Since you don’t have your golden child to dote on anymore because she’s too far away? Since I turned my life around and made a success of myself despite your many predictions about me coming to a bad end? You know what? This is the absolute worse time you could have called me.”

“I only thought--”

“Pardon my rudeness, but I really don’t give a rat’s ass about what you thought. This conversation is over. I’m driving right now, and I need to concentrate on the road.”

“Wait! Don’t hang up, dammit! How many times do we have to keep apologizing? We’re your parents, for God’s sake.”

“Funny you should remember that now when I don’t need you anymore. We don’t really have anything left to say to each other. Goodbye.”

“Simon—”

“I said goodbye.” He pushed the button to disconnect the call. Angry tears swam to his eyes but he’d be damned if he let them fall. “Fuck!” Simon cursed in frustration slamming his fist against the wheel inadvertently making the horn honk.

Just hearing his father’s voice reduced him to an emotional mess. He should have taken a cue from his sister and moved as far away from them as possible, but when a business opportunity had presented itself, he couldn’t pass it up.

Friends he’d made over the past few years often asked him why he wasn’t close to his parents, but Simon would always brush those questions aside. Even sharing certain information with his therapist had been painful. In his mind, he’d already forgiven them for how they used to treat him, but to him, forgiving didn’t mean forgetting. Trying to forge a normal relationship with them was an entirely different issue.

The last time Simon saw his parents was at Thanksgiving dinner hosted by his Aunt Penelope and Uncle Stu, Pete’s parents. The only reason he’d shown up in the first place was because he’d been informed that his mother and father would be vacationing in Jamaica. To his surprise they were there waiting for him. It had been an ambush. His aunt had been behind the whole charade. He realized she only had the best intentions, but it didn’t stop his anger. It took the better part of an hour for Pete and Uncle Stu to convince him to stay.

It had to be one of the tensest dinners he’d ever sat through. Whenever one of his parents spoke to him, Simon shut down, at times ignoring them, and other instances giving them curt answers. By the time dessert was served he’d had enough and made his excuses to leave.

On his way out the door, his mother stopped him. As usual, she looked immaculate without a hair out of place, her face tight from Botox injections.  “Simon
, wait. Don’t leave like this.”

“Like how?”

“You’ve hardly said a word to your father and me. This is Thanksgiving, and the least you could do is act civil while other people are around.”

Simon laughed humorlessly. “And that’s what’s important to yo
u, right? Keeping up appearances? Thanks, but no thanks. I’m tired of pretending, so get used to it, Ann.”

She gasped, her face going pale. “I’m your mother.”

“Funny, you didn’t act like it when I lived with you.”

“I know I’ve made some mistakes, but can’t you just find it in
your heart to let it go?”

“According to you I have no heart. No, or was that a soul? Yes, that’s right. I have no soul, so how do you expect one like me to go on? Really
, Ann, you can’t have it both ways.”

“I didn’t mean it. I’m so sorry for saying that, but I was so angry and hurt at the time. How long are you going to make us pay for our mistakes?”

“How long have you got?”

She shut her eyes against his harsh words. “You weren’t always like this. You used to be so loving and caring.”

“Oh, I can still be both of those things, but I just decided to stop wasting that side of me on you and Harold. Look, this is a pointless conversation. I have to go.”

She grabbed his arm to stop him from walking out the door, tears glistening in her eyes. “When will we see you again?”

“If I have anything to do with it, never, but this is a small world so I guess we’ll run into each other sooner or later.”

“Is that the way it’s going to be between us for the rest of our lives?”

“This was a decision you two made long before I came to my senses. Now let go of me so I can get out of here.”

His mother dropped his arm as if she’d been scorched. Simon saw the pain in her brown eyes, but ignored it. Good. Let her feel what he’d felt all those years ago.

The ringing of his cell phone brought him back to the present. He decided not to answer. The call with his father had already put him out of sorts and he had no more energy to deal with anyone else.

Meeting Jessica had been the highpoint of his day, but talking to his father brought back all the old hurts. Simon thought he was getting closer to healing, but the pain seemed never ending.

                                 
CHAPTER FIVE

Jessica realized the risk she was taking by going on a trip with Simon. Ellie thought she was crazy spending a week with a practical stranger. Maybe she was crazy after all she didn’t know much about Simon beyond what he’d told her. For once she wanted to trust her instincts and do something a little nuts.

She’d never been big on taking chances, especially after losing Jason, but she was twenty-nine years old, well past time to start taking charge of her life. She looked down at the address he’d given her to confirm this was the right place as she pulled into the driveway next to the Simon’s white SUV.

As she slid out of her car, two large dogs came bounding out of the house, barking. Jessica let out a loud screech and climbed back into her vehicle. Simon had told her he had two black labs, but for all she knew they could have been Cujo’s cousins, and she had no intention of becoming doggy chow.

The dogs threw themselves at her car and clawed at her window. “Dennis, Ramona, get down from there!” Simon stepped out of the house, shooting her an apologetic look. The dogs jumped down obediently and ran to their master with tongues wagging.

As Simon approached the wind blew, tousling his wavy blond hair in the breeze. He looked so handsome Jessica forgot her near-death experience at the hands of the demon dogs. “I’m really sorry about these two. Believe it or not, they were just trying to be friendly, but sometimes their over exuberance can be misconstrued.”

Jessica cautiously opened her car door, eyeing the dogs warily. “They’re so…so big. Are they going to be here with us the entire week?”

“I hope that won’t be a problem. If it is, I can have Pete come and get them, although they look forward to our trips to the beach.”

How could Jessica tell him that his dogs frightened her and she’d rather they not be here without coming off as a total bitch? “I…maybe this wasn’t such a good idea for me to come here after all.”

His dark blond brows knitted together with concern. “Are you allergic to dogs? I should have asked before just assuming that it would be okay with you.”

“No, I’m not. And you didn’t have to ask my permission to bring them. This is your home.”

“Please don’t go. Let me at least take them in the house so you can come out of your car.”

Jessica felt like an idiot. What must Simon be thinking of her? They were just dogs. “No, I’ll get out of the car” She looked over at the two panting dogs; they didn’t seem as big as she’d originally thought. They were actually kind of cute.

Carefully, she eased out of her vehicle, her muscles tense. To her relief the two animals remained by Simon. “You probably think I’m being silly. I remember being knocked over by a big dog as a kid and it’s always stuck with me. I guess I can be a bit neurotic sometimes.”

“I don’t think you’re silly at all. Not everyone is dog person. I realize how intimidating they look, but to be honest, these two are probably more of a liability than anything else.”

“What do you mean?”

“If anyone ever broke into my home, these two lugs would probably play with the intruder rather than guard the house. I still love them, though,” he said with a chuckle, giving each of the dogs an affectionate rub behind the ear. “Let them sniff your hand and I guarantee you’ll have two friends for life.”

Jessica wasn’t sure she wanted to be friends with the two creatures, but if they were as harmless as Simon claimed them to be, she’d give it a shot. Tentatively she stepped forward sticking a shaking hand out in front of the closest dog. It buried its wet nose in her hand before giving it a healthy lick. Eww.

Despite being slightly grossed out, she repeated the motion with the second dog. This one merely nuzzled her hand. Simon nodded approvingly. “See, I told you they were big babies. This here is Dennis to my left, and this gorgeous female is Ramona.”

“They’re Labradors, right?”

“Yep. They’re very loyal and good with kids. Now enough about them, let me help you with your things. You look very nice, by the way.” His dark blue gaze slid down her body with an appreciative gleam.

She felt her cheeks grow hot. Jessica had taken extra care to dress this morning in a pair of white jeans that hugged her hips snugly, and an off the shoulder black top. Her hair was pulled back in a severe bun. Jessica rarely wore make-up but today she’d wore a little tinted gloss, some eye liner and mascara. She felt pretty good about her appearance and was glad to know that Simon seemed to like it too.

“Thank you. I pack light so I don’t have a whole lot of stuff.”

“No matter, I’ll get it for you. Why don’t you go in and make yourself comfortable.”

“Simon, I’d like to thank you again for letting me stay here for the week. This is actually my first real vacation since my family used to take vacations together, so it’s been several years.”

“Well, I’ll definitely make sure to make this a memorable week for you.”

Smiling, she headed toward the house. The man gave her goose bumps without even trying. To her surprise, the dogs followed close on her heel, looking up at her expectantly. She gasped when she stepped inside. It was huge. A large window leading to a balcony showed a beachside view. This seemed to be a lot of room for just one person. Though Simon had been modest about his line of work of creating high-end custom furniture, Jessica had deduced he did quite well with it, from the way he dressed to the car he drove, and this house only confirmed her supposition.

The house was tastefully decorated in blue and cream. It was clean, much cleaner than she would have imagined a house to be with a single guy residing in it. The living room led to a large open kitchen with all the latest gadgets on display. One of the dogs, Ramona she thought it was, barked. “What is it, girl?” The dog rubbed its large body against her leg.

“She just wants you to pet her. Ramona is very affectionate. Dennis is as well, but it just takes him a little longer to warm up to strangers. By the end of the night you’ll have both of them literally eating out of your hands if you let them.” Simon spoke as she came inside. “Follow me and I’ll show you to your room.” Turning to the dog, he ordered, “stay.”

He led her upstairs and showed her to a room at the end of the hallway. Jessica’s eyes widened when she stepped over the threshold. “Simon, it’s gorgeous.” The room had its own private balcony, with a view of the ocean as well. It also had a fireplace, queen size bed, and a huge flat screen television mounted on the wall.

“I’m glad you like it. The door on your right is your private bathroom. And a mini fridge is over here. So if you wanted to stay in your room for the rest of the week you could, but I hope you’ll join me downstairs when you’re up to it.”

Jessica was in awe of this place. When he’d invited her to his beach house she’d never expected it to be quite so luxurious. “I really don’t know what to say. I mean, this is fabulous. I feel like I should give you something for lodging this week. I mean, after all, had I gone to the shore on my own I’d have to pay for a hotel.”

Simon put her suitcases down and strode over to her with purposeful strides. “That’s the last time, I want to hear you even mention paying me to stay here. You’re my guest. Period.”

“But, there’s got to be something I can do to repay you for your kindness.”

“You really want to repay me?”

“I’d feel more comfortable if I contribute something. I’d feel like such a mooch for staying here without contributing to my keep.”

Simon’s eyes darkened, an indiscernible expression entering his eyes. “If you want to repay me, I’ll take that repayment now. I want a kiss.”

Before she could think of a comeback, his arms were already around her, pulling her close. When his lips crashed down on hers, Jessica was too surprised to react at first. In the back of her mind it occurred to her to fight him off, after all, he’d said this would be a no strings attached vacation, yet his arms were wrapped tightly around her.  She’d been here for less than five minutes.

However, the warmth of his mouth moving over hers so deliciously was enough to make her knees grow weak. Her lips parted beneath the insistent pressure of his probing tongue. Simon explored her mouth, with slow seductive motions. The taste of mint clung to his tongue, and the scent of a musky cologne filled her nostrils. He titillated her senses with little effort.  Jessica melted against him, her body heating up with awareness. She cupped the back of his neck as she pressed her breasts against his broad chest.

Her pussy tingled, sending a jolt of pure ecstasy shooting through her body. She’d been kissed before, but nothing had quite prepared her for this. This was not a mere meeting of the mouths—it was more like a meeting of the souls.

Simon ran his hands along her spine, wedging his knee between her thighs. Jessica felt the outline of his cock pressing against him. Not being very experienced, she couldn’t tell whether he was big in that department or not, but it certainly felt like it. “God, you taste delicious,” he muttered against her mouth.

Before she realized what was happening, Jessica was propelled to the bed. She fell backward, with Simon falling on top of her. Before her reason returned, his mouth was on hers again. Thoughts of being careful and taking things slowly flew out the window when he pressed hot ravenous kisses against her face and neck.

“Beautiful, just beautiful,” he chanted again and again.

She shivered when he pushed up her top to reveal her strapless bra. The intensity of his stare made her shiver with anticipation. Simon quickly unfastened the front clasp exposing her naked breasts to his full scrutiny.  Her nipples instantly tightened as cool air hit them. Simon gasped. “They’re just like I pictured them. These beauties look extra sensitive. I’m glad.”

“Why?” she croaked.

“Because it’ll feel good when I do this.” He dipped his head and captured one taut peak between his teeth. Lord have mercy, she was going to cream in her panties right here and now if he kept this up. As though they had a mind of their own, her hands flew up to hold his head against her chest as she arched her back against his mouth.

She was on fire. Simon circled and laved her aching nipple with his tongue. He licked it as though with reverence and worship. Then he sucked on it, sending new waves of sensation coursing through her.  No one had ever done such wonderful things to her body before, and she wasn’t sure how much more of this she’d be able to take.

Simon lifted his head only to transfer his attention to her other breast. “Simon,” she moaned his name for lack of anything better to say. The feel of his hot mouth against her skin was good, but she wanted more. Her inexperience, however, made it difficult for her to verbalize exactly what she wanted him to do.

She wanted to feel his bare skin under her fingertips, wanted it pressed against hers. As though reading her mind, Simon pulled back just enough to rip his shirt over his head in one swift movement before falling back on top of her. He kissed the stretched arch of her neck, hands fumbling with the clasp of her jeans. Raising his head, he looked in to her eyes. She wiggled and squirmed beneath him, barely containing the raging hormones zigzagging through her body.

She slid her hands up and down his tanned, muscular arms, reveling in the contrast their skin made. In the back of her mind, she knew there had been a possibility of this happening when she agreed to spend the week with him, but didn’t think it would happen so soon. Now, her untutored body was under his command and there wasn’t a damn thing she could do about it.

A salacious need filled her. Jessica sighed when Simon pulled off her shoes and kissed her ankles and toes. Unable to help herself, she giggled. He shot her a crooked grin. “Ticklish?”

“Extremely,” she confessed.

“Mmm, I’ll have to keep that in mind. His voice was husky with passion. She offered no protest when he pulled her hip-hugging jeans off, although she wished she weren’t wearing her sensible white granny panties. “Jessica, your body is amazing,” Simon whispered, his tone full of wonder as his eyes devoured her.

She ran her palms over the contours of his well-toned chest. “So is yours.” Wanting to feel his chest crushing her breasts again, Jessica pulled him on top of her until their mouths merged into one. Unlike the hungry kiss from before, this one was tender, and gentle. Simon traced the seam of her lips with the tip of his tongue. “I don’t think I can get enough of you, baby,” he whispered.

She moaned into his mouth, too delirious with passion to respond. Her panties were damp and she pressed her thighs tightly together to relieve the delicious ache within. Simon cradled her breasts in his palms, kneading and shaping them, driving her closer to the edge of insanity. Jessica didn’t know how much more of this she could take before she begged him to fuck her senseless.

Suddenly he raised his head and looked at her in concern, wrinkling his forehead. “I’m so sorry.”

Confusion swept through her. “What…what are you talking about?”

“I swear I didn’t mean things to get this out of hand. I only wanted a kiss and even that was crossing the line. I promised I’d keep my hands to myself unless you asked me not to, and here I am about to ravage you like an animal.  I didn’t invite you here for this, but you looked so beautiful and I couldn’t stop myself.”

Now she understood, and wasn’t quite sure how to respond. For the past twelve years of her life, she’d lived without taking risks, without throwing caution to the wind. Jessica wasn’t sure if that could be called living. Right now, all she could think of was how hot her body was with him pressed so erotically against her, and how she longed for the completion of his lovemaking. Why not? She wanted him, and it was obvious that he desired her as well. “What do you want to do now?” she asked finally finding her voice.