Forbidden Paths
Authors: P. J. Belden
Forbidden Paths
P. J. Belden
© P. J. Belden, 2014
Forbidden Paths (#1 Forbidden Series)
© P. J. Belden 2014
This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are either a product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, business establishments, events, or locale is entirely coincidental.
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the publisher, except by a reviewer who wishes to quote brief passages for review purposes only.
First and Foremost, I want to thank my hubby and my three amazing kids for their amazing support and inspiration. You guys are my heart and I love you with all of it.
Faith, my beautiful amazing sister, I owe you far more than a character named after you, but there really is nothing I could do to show my thanks. I’d be so lost without you and I’m forever grateful for everything you have done for me. Love you lots girl!
Faith
Seventeen years old
Walking the river’s edge, I thought about my life so far. Most kids my age are preparing for college and starting their lives, but not me. No, I wasn’t allowed to think that way. My job, as my parents informed me, was to serve my husband.
Serve my husband, are you kidding me? What century are we living in?
Sometimes, I just wanted to have a normal life with normal expectations. But normal was never meant for me and it never will be. I was stuck in this life, with no choice, no voice, and no happiness.
Dropping down to the ground, I pull my knees up to my chest, wrapping my arms around my legs. Resting my chin on my knees, I sigh heavily. It is these moments that I am able to be a little free.
My parents are gone for a while. My dad has something to go to out of state for and mom always goes everywhere with him. I get these moments once or twice a year. It is nice to just breathe and not be corrected over how I was doing it.
It was like I was stuck in the past. Growing up, I was made to take etiquette classes, sent off to boarding school… For a little while I was among other kids. When boys started taking interest in me, my parents yanked me back home faster than I could blink. I’ve been trapped inside
Harper Manor
for years now. I still write to my best friend Lia. She’s never given up on me. Her upbringing is the same as mine. She wants no part in it, yet telling our parents is unacceptable.
“Are you okay?”
Jumping, I turned around to see a boy around my age standing behind me. He had dirty blonde hair and beautiful green eyes. His eyes carried concern and kindness through their depths and my heart starts to slow its frantic race.
“I’m… I’m fine. You scared me.”
“I didn’t mean to, miss,” he reaches his hand out to help me up. “I’d been talking to you for a bit there and you didn’t respond.”
Reaching out, I take his hand. A jolt starts in my hand and moves its way up my arm and into my chest as I look up and meet his eyes. They weren’t just green. They were emerald, deep emerald, pulling me into their intense depths.
Shaking my head, I step back from him, brushing my hands down my dress. “I’m sorry. I must have been lost in my thoughts.”
He looks at me without saying anything. Smiling, he again extends his hand to me. “My name’s Logan. You look like you could use some company.”
Placing my hand back in his and immediately getting the warmth, I talk in a small voice. “I’m Faith. I was only escaping for a little bit,” looking around. “You know this is private property. How’d you get in here?”
Holding up his other hand, he feigns innocent. “Hey I’m not trying to get in any trouble. Just want to escape for a little bit like you.”
All the while, he still holds my hand in his. His thumb gently running back and forth over the top of my hand, our eyes meet again. We are held almost captive it seems.
What the hell is this feeling?
Pulling my hand free, I tuck my hair behind my ear. Well, I would have been tucking my hair behind my ear if it was down. My parents just left and when they were around I was not allowed to have my hair down. It wasn’t proper. Or so I’m told.
“Um, well, uh, Mr. Logan, I’ll leave you be to escape,” I say nervously as I start to walk away.
“No, wait,” he grabs my hand and I jerk my head around to look at him. “Wait please.”
All I can do is stare at him. The feelings that come over me every time he touches me is confusing and exhilarating. I’ve been locked away, hidden from the world for so long, I don’t know what all this stuff is anymore.
“What?”
“Please sit with me. Have a conversation with me. I’m guessing that you have a life similar to mine.”
Sitting down, I look up at him, “What kind of life do you have?”
He sits down next to me and smiles. “Well, how much do you want to know?”
“Everything. Anything,” I smile eager for what life is like outside these walls.
“Well, I’m nineteen. I’m raising my four younger siblings. I lost my mother to cancer when I was younger and my father died in an industrial accident. It left me to be the man of the house. They depend on me, need me to help teach them. So I grew up quickly. My days are spent focusing on them. I was following the creek and, well, I found you.”
“I’m so sorry.” Tears welled in my eyes at the unbelievably painful life he’s had. Not only did he watch both his parents pass away, but he was raising his siblings when he was only a child himself.
He shrugs. “We all have our hurdles to jump. Some are just higher than the others.”
“How long have you been on your own?”
“Since I was fifteen. My grandparents were supposed to raise us, but they never cared about us. We were on our own. I had no choice, but to step up. When I was sixteen, I petitioned the courts for full custody of my siblings. It took another year, but I won and we moved out immediately.” He shakes his head with a smile on his face. “I’ve never told anyone this.”
“Please continue. Tell me whatever you want me to know. Please.”
His story captured me. It pulled me in and held me as if we’ve been friends forever. Hearing his story gave me the sense that I’ve known him all my life and we were just getting together for another day. The tears danced at the edge of my eyes, begging to be set free.
“Well, um, I had to drop out of school so I could get a full time job to support my siblings. I took night classes to earn my GED. Now, I’m taking night classes to earn my business degree. Though they’re a pain in my butt most days, I love my siblings and I’ll do anything for them. We aren’t well off financially wise, but we aren’t struggling either. I make a decent living as a contractor. The only time it really gets to me is when it’s parent night at their schools. My parents would have loved to have gone. They would have been the most embarrassing parents in the bunch,” he laughs sadly.
Before I could even think about what I was doing, I fling myself in his arms and hug him. His hesitation is immediately noticeable as his hands touch my back and off again before he wrapped me in his arms. The feeling that spread through me shook me and I pull away from him.
“I’m sorry,” I mumble looking down at my hands.
“Don’t be sorry,” he says softly. “Please.”
“Um, maybe, um, I should go,” I say nervously, turning to run away from my embarrassment.
Logan grabs my hand softly, but firmly in his and stops me. “Don’t go. Stay and talk with me. Please.”
“I…”
How can I explain to him that I’ve never really talked to people before, that I don’t know how to act around people? Sure I’ve attended several events with my parents, but I hardly consider smiling and nodding interaction. Logan probably has friends that he regularly hangs around. At the very least he has his siblings to talk, joke, play, interact with. I don’t even have my parents to count.
Hell, I’ve talked to the maids and cooks more than I’ve talked to them. If I had to guess the conversations I’ve had in the seventeen years of my life I’d have to say five, maybe six conversations. If you really want to know, I can even tell you the conversations. That’s how little I talk with them.
I’m not a daughter. Never have been and never will be. All I am to them is property. A trophy. Something for them to brag about and help extend their legacy.
“Faith?”
Looking up at him, he is looking at me oddly. “This is… You are… I don’t know how to do this,” I sigh in embarrassment.
“You don’t know how to do what?”
“This. Talking, being friends.”
“You don’t have friends?” Logan sounds almost shocked.
Hey, could I blame him? What teenager do you know that doesn’t have at least three screaming friends to vent to or gossip?
“Kind of hard to have friends when you’re not allowed outside the property,” I said sadly.
“Wow, so you have no one to talk to? Do you at least have siblings?”
I shook my head, sadly. Just then the sound of the guard looking for me filled the strained silence between us. Looking behind me to see where he was, I turn back around to face Logan.
“I have to go. It was nice meeting you Logan. Thanks for sitting around talking to me.”
Not waiting for his response, I turn around and run toward the guard. When I approached him, he looked at me as if I were in trouble.
“Where have you been Miss?”
“I was walking in the garden. I’m allowed to be outside the house, you know?” I snap.
“I know Miss,” Beau sounded almost sad.
Three days…
It’s been three days since I’ve been able to get back down to the river. I made sure I told Beau where I was going so he didn’t come looking for me again. Not that I expected Logan to be there, but I did hope he would be.
Over the past few days, I have not been able to push him out of my mind. His eyes were there when I closed mine. I could feel his arms around me as we hugged. It wasn’t just because he was there when no one else was. The maids’ sons have all tried to come on to me. I may be confined, but I’m not stupid. Three of the sons and I even made out. Not all at once obviously, but that was as far as I’d let it go. I’m not a slut. It was simply curiosity and honestly it wasn’t great.
But then you have Logan, who in a single look lights my whole body on fire. Absolutely insanely drives me wild. My hands began to shake the closer I got to the river. As hard as I try not to get my hopes up, they still were. There’s nothing I want more than for him to be there by the river waiting for me.
With the river finally coming into view, my heart falls in my chest. He’s not there. Why did I even think he would be? After all, I basically told him I was a loser before running away. It was a blip in my otherwise life meant for misery. A moment that someone cared.
“Faith?”
I spun around so fast, I lost my footing and start to fall backward toward the water. Logan moves faster than I can register and is by my side catching me. The situation was almost as if I was in slow motion, but Logan was in regular speed.
Logan holds me firmly against his chest. I wasn’t complaining. His touch brings out something in me, I want to figure out what that is. Slowly leaning back, I look up at him.
“Thank you,” I whisper.
Logan’s face is so close to my own. Swallowing hard, my eyes drop to his lips before meeting his eyes again. There was an intensity in his eyes that none of those other boys I’ve made out with have had. Leaning down slowly, his eyes bounce between mine and my mouth, as if he was asking permission to kiss me.
“Yes,” slips from my lips on a whisper before his lips finally seal over mine.
His lips are soft and gentle on mine, as if savoring the taste. My hands move around his waist as his tangle in my hair. The kiss deepens further. Slowly, I move my hands from around his waist and move up his chest. As my hands smoothed over his torso, I could feel the well-defined muscles of a man not afraid to work. His tongue touches mine as my arms wrap around his neck. A low growl rumbles in his chest and he slowly moves his hands from my hair down my back.
Wrapping them around my waist, our tongues dance a dance I’ve never danced before. Nothing compares to this moment. This was… Well, it was… I don’t even have words to describe this moment.
Logan moves his hands lower to my ass pulling me into his erection. It was time to put a stop to one enjoyable kiss. Pulling back a little, he rests his forehead to mine. Neither of us say a word. With my eyes closed, I try to get my breathing under control.
“I was worried about you,” Logan breaks the silence.
Opening my eyes, I look into his. “Why?”
“I’ve been here every night waiting for you, but you’ve never showed.”
“Sorry. I don’t always come out here. I’m glad you’re here.”
Three months later…
“Logan,” I call as soon as the river comes in view.
He turns and smiles at me. This man was everything to me. Everything. I don’t know where I’d be without him. Logan’s all I ever think about, dream about, see. In the last three months, I’ve fallen helplessly in love with him. He was my forever, I could just feel it.
“Faith,” he breathes before cupping my face and kissing me like there was no tomorrow.
My arms wind around his neck and I pull him closer to me. The urge was there. It was screaming at me. I pull away from the kiss slightly.
“Do you know how worried I was? You were supposed to meet me here last night. After all that trouble you were having with your father…” Logan says.
My father is on some kick about marrying me off. He and I have been butting heads over it so much lately that two days ago, he actually hit me for the first time. Logan has wanted me to run away ever since.
“They didn’t leave last night like they were supposed to, but they did leave this morning.”
“Baby, I love you. Honestly, I think I have since I first laid eyes on you, but definitely knew it when we kissed for the first time. I love you,” he breathes before taking my lips with his.