Authors: P. J. Belden
“What’s the sense of being a boss if you don’t take a vacation every now and again? Trust me… You’ll be glad we requested your vacation once you see what we have for you,” he grins big.
Groaning, I grab my keys and follow behind him out the door. Why do I suddenly have a feeling in the pit of my stomach that I’m not going to be the same after tonight?
My brothers have never been known for being tactful or even considerate, not when it came to fun. Don’t get me wrong. I love them all and as I said before they’ve grown into respectful men and I couldn’t be prouder of them, but then you have their carefree sides… I shake my head and just pray it’s a good thing and not a bad thing.
# # #
Leif
Walking further behind Logan, he is grumbling about hating surprises. Honestly, I have to laugh at him. He was like a five year old when it came to this stuff. But my brother was the most selfless man I’ve ever met. He never thought of himself. It was only ever us.
That was until he met Faith. When he was with Faith, he lived. She gave my brother something that my brothers and I have been trying to give him for years. A reason to smile.
He smiles and he’s ‘happy’, but he’s not fulfilled. She gave that to him. But just as quick as it seems she appeared, she left him broken. I wanted to hunt her down myself and drag her back to my brother. If anyone deserves to be happy, it’s Logan.
“Be right back. I’m going to go grab something real quick.” I say before hurrying over a couple aisles away.
Pulling out my phone, I peek around the end to make sure he didn’t follow before calling the woman I can’t get off my mind, but can never have.
“Hello?”
“Hey beautiful,” I say and truly mean it.
Lia was by far the most beautiful woman that has ever graced my line of sight. I’ve been head over heels in love with her from the first day I met her. The problem was she never saw me that way. So I’ve been forced to give up hope and move on.
That’s when I met Tami. Tami was an amazing woman. She worked with a friend of mine. We met at a work function and really hit it off. There was a connection between us, but it just wasn’t the same way I felt as when I just heard Lia’s voice.
Tami had short black hair, whereas Lia has long blonde hair. Tami has brown eyes and Lia has bright blue intoxicating eyes. Is it wrong of me to be with Tami when Lia has always held my heart? Maybe so, but I do care about Tami and we are happy together.
It’s just a matter of accepting the truth and moving forward. The fact of the matter is that Lia only sees me as a friend regardless of how I feel. She’s never let on that she’s felt any differently.
“Always the charmer, Leif. What do I owe the honor of your call today?”
“Honor, huh?” I joke.
“You know I love you,” she says almost breathlessly.
My heart stutters in my chest. For a moment I am completely stunned. To hear those words come out of her mouth was indescribable. I just wish she meant them the way I long for her too. Still even though I know it wasn’t real, my mouth spews the words out anyway.
“I love you too, Lia.”
It was breathless and as close as I’ll ever get to sharing that moment with her. Shaking my head to clear my thoughts, I hear her intake of breath. There is a long pause where neither of us say anything. I wonder if maybe she’s feeling the same thing I am.
“So, uh, what did you call for?” Lia asks almost sounding choked up.
“What did I call for… Oh yeah,” feeling stupid. “I wanted to find out if you’ve been able to do what I asked for Friday?”
“Yeah, I’ve got it all set up. What time should we arrive?”
“Can you be there around say four? We’re kind of busy tonight and I want Logan to have a
full
night of enjoyment out of this.”
“You got him a girl?”
“Kind of,” I laugh.
“You didn’t buy him a girl?”
“I did and I’m hoping she stays all night.”
“You know that co…”
“I’m fully aware of what that means and his happiness is worth it.”
“Okay,” she replies almost sounding hurt. “I was just warning you.”
“I’m sorry, Lia. I didn’t mean to bite your head off. I’m just so tired of seeing my brother unhappy.”
“And what about you, Leif? What are you waiting for? You deserve happiness too.”
“Have you ever fallen for someone you can’t have?” I whisper.
“Yeah, it’s the reason I won’t date. Not fair to only give a part of myself when the other gives their whole self.”
Nodding as if she can see me. “Well, I thought the same thing until I realized that if someone can love that part of me that’s left enough it might be able to make me happy. So I’m trying that.”
“You’ve never stepped forward with the person you’ve fallen for and told them?”
Why was she so damn curious all of a sudden?
“I’ve hinted at it, but there’s too much to lose if she doesn’t feel the same.”
“Maybe she feels the same way you do and won’t speak up?”
“Lia are you tr…”
“Did you get whatever you needed in the…” he looks around with a smirk on his face. “In the baby aisle?”
Looking around, it was the first time I register any of my surroundings.
Shit!
“I’ve got to go. I’ll see you at four tomorrow.”
Hanging up the phone, I look at a laughing Logan. It was good to see him laugh even if it was at my expense.
“Okay so I needed to make a phone call that you couldn’t hear,” I confess.
“I was about to ask what you and Tami have been up to,” he laughs.
“Hardy har har… bastard. Let’s just go. Do we have everything?” I grumble.
“Wow, somebody’s good mood has vanished,” Logan observes.
Shaking my head and the mood that phone call puts me in, I smile at him. “Let’s go brother. We’ve got company coming soon.”
Faith
This was my last time.
Wow…
I will finally be set free.
Well, I’m free from selling my body to men to get even with my family. I’ve been in the paper so many times. Every time it became three against one.
“Read this!” My father yells throwing the paper at me.
Picking the paper up from the floor, I flip it over to see the front page news.
‘Heiress Faith Harper at it again. Seen exiting a hotel with two smiling men.’
All I could do was laugh. This was the exact reaction I hoped to get from them. Even knowing what was going to come from both my antics and my laughter, I still couldn’t stop the swell of ‘take that’ in my chest.
Even as I watched Tony stalk toward me, the smile was still plastered on my face. I just didn’t care anymore. If he kills me today then I wouldn’t complain. Maybe there is some sadistic part of me that longed for my death. Only in my death would I be able to be free from all that haunts me.
“You find this funny do you? You’re making a joke of yourself.”
“No,” I shake my head, still smiling. “I’m making a joke of you. Read the article. They’re happy to see me embracing my youth,” I laugh.
He smacks me. Even the pain throbbing in my head right now, didn’t stop the smile from staying on my face. I was getting what I wanted.
“You’re a whore,” he hisses.
“You made me that way,” I hiss right back.
I see out of the corner of my eye, him ball his fist up.
Please hit me you sick, fucking bastard,
I scream inside my head.
“Hit me you fucking coward. Hit me! I can see from your fists you want to. Hit me! Nothing’s ever stopped you for hitting or raping me before.”
He laughs. “You call that rape? You’re mine.”
“I’m not yours. Never have been yours. And yes I call that rape. It was not a consensual act.”
“You’re reaching…”
“And you’re a rapist,” I hiss.
It was after that he left claiming a business trip. My father tried to lock me in my room, but when all the staff there hated all of them, it didn’t take long for me to get out. I’ve been away from the house for two weeks now.
Lia has been so nice to let me crash with her. It’s a construction site. Most rooms were under renovation leaving only one bedroom usable at the moment, but we share the bed no problem… Well, until she starts playing with herself in her sleep. Yeah, I high tail it out of there and sleep on the couch. My guess is it’s the mystery guy she’s hooked on.
Thankfully, Lia has also been coming with me to my appointments because being alone for these is a scary thought. I’m now twelve weeks along. Lia has yet to tell me the name of the guy. She said after this.
“Lia!” I call. “You home?”
“Yeah. In your new bedroom.”
I walk in the direction her voice is coming from to find Lia going through clothes. “What are you doing?”
“Trying to find something sexy, but will hide that slight bump you have going on,” she nods to my belly.
Looking down, I run my hands over it. “You can hardly tell. Unless you know what you’re looking for.”
“Trust me a man will notice right away.”
“So, what time is it?”
“In two hours. We need to hurry because I still need to swing by and pick up Hazel.”
We begin a mad dash to get ready for tonight. Tonight’s theme is
Masked Choice
basically we start out in masks and as the night progresses we choose whether to stay masked or reveal ourselves to our partners.
Like the masked party we did a couple months ago, we have been assigned letters to correspond with our partner. She has hosted eight of these since my first, but thankfully I hadn’t been included in any of them but this one.
My last one.
It’s as we are headed for Hazel’s, we were talking about how my appointment went, that she lays the bomb on me.
“It’s what!” I stare at her in shock.
“It’s the same guys from the last masked party we had.”
“You mean the one where I got pregnant,” I hiss.
“Yes, I figure if you want to tell him you can do it tonight. I’ve assigned you guys together, again.”
Closing my eyes, I try to count to ten and calm down. But since I’ve been pregnant, calming down has been slim to none lately.
“You didn’t think to tell me this before now. You’ve known about this for how long now?” I force out through clenched teeth.
“Oh, I thought about it, but then I figured it’d be best done like this. You’d have less time to freak out like you always do. You want to be mad at me, but you know it’s true. Besides the guy requested you.”
Well, that knocks the wind out of my angry sails. “He did?”
“Yeah according to the other guy that booked the party, he can’t shut up about you.”
A small smile forms on my lips. He can’t stop talking about me. Maybe there’s hope here yet?
Before long we had Hazel in the car and headed in the direction of the ‘party’. Hazel often attends the same parties as I do. She’s beautiful. She’s older than both Lia and I, but not too old. She longs to meet Mr. Right and believes she’ll find him and have her family that she’s always dreamed of.
Many times Hazel would lecture me about Logan. She’d tell me that if I ever got the chance to meet Logan again, to grasp it for all it’s worth.
Hazel’s story breaks my heart. She got into performing private parties after she was abused by her ex-husband. He beat her so bad that she was in a coma for three months, leaving her family unsure if she’d live or die.
When she woke from her coma, her recovery was long and hard. Because of the work that went into her recovery all her family turned against her and walked away without looking back. She’s been trying to pick up the pieces of her life since that moment.
I pray that she’ll find her true love because if anyone deserves a happily ever after she did. Hazel was the kindest person I’ve ever met, but no one seems to see the heart she has beneath the skin they ravage and pay for.
“How’d your appointment go?” She hugs me.
“Uh, good I think. I’m measuring well and I’ve gained ten pounds already,” I shudder.
Hazel laughs, her eyes sad. “That’s great. I’m going to make my guess and say it’s a girl,” she teases.
“What? No way! It’s a boy,” Lia objects.
Laughing, I close my eyes to hide the panic. “We’ll know in a couple months, if I find out. I may make you guys wait until he or she is born.”
“You would be that cruel,” Lia mutters.
“So Lia, is it the same guys from last time,” Hazel asks, changing the subject.
“Yes. You’ll have A again. Apparently they all enjoyed themselves immensely last time.”
“Ah, so did I. That A made me feel things I’ve never felt before,” she sighs.
I turn in my seat and look back at her. “Do you think he could be your one?”
“Oh honey, I’ve given up that hope. Maybe I was made to be shared,” she smirks.
Lia and I laugh, but deep down I really believe she thinks she’s not worthy. Well, I may have to intervene with that one. She deserves to be cherished, treasured and desired by someone that see’s past a release. Even if it isn’t this A character, I’ll find her someone.
We pull up outside the two story country house. It’s white with green shutters and door. A small porch, big enough for a porch swing and two chairs and a side table, greets you at the end of a long cobble stone path. It was serene out here. Private.
Nerves plague me and I can’t get myself to move out of the car. Lia exits and moves around to my side. Squatting down, she takes my hands in hers.
“You can do this. Remember you are in full control of what you say and what you show. If you don’t want him to know then don’t remove the mask. Okay?”
I nod my head. Sliding on my mask, I take a deep breath and climb from the car. “The only other time I’ve felt the way I did with him was with Logan. To lose two men that have given me that feeling…”
“It’s going to be just fine, sweets.”
“What makes you so sure?” I look at her, pleadingly.
“Hey, it’s me. When have I ever been wrong?”
I laugh despite the overwhelming urge I have to run. Not run because of something bad, but because of starting a family with someone other than Logan. That is what kills me the most. The love I have for Logan will never dissipate. It will always be there. This guy that I’m about to let know he’s going to be a father, though he brings my body alive like no one else has aside from Logan, he’ll never have the full me because my heart will forever remain with Logan.
“Let’s do this,” Hazel says, trying to energize us like she always does.
I swallow the lump in my throat and put one shaky foot in front of the other. Lia is the one that knocks this time. I stand behind her and try to get my bearings. I hear rumbles of voices inside before I hear the door open. I stop breathing.
“Well hello again, Miss BB and Miss AA and… oh,” I almost hear a sad tone to his voice.
Lia steps out of the way and I’m instantly drawn to his eyes again. A smile erupts on his face.
“Miss CC, you’ve made it,” he grins at me.
My whole body warms at the pure sexiness of his smile.
Damn!
He was sex personified.
“I did. Did you not want me here? I can leave,” I say suddenly nervous.
Lia and Hazel have already gone inside leaving me in the awkwardness of this meeting.
He quickly grabs my hand. “No, please stay. I want you here.”
Mr. C steps forward and pulls me the rest of the distance between us. He leans slowly down and kisses me. It’s soft and tender, taking me by complete surprise.
“Do you want to go upstairs or go for a walk?” He asks quietly, his head resting on mine.
Too scared to be out of earshot when I tell him he’s going to be a dad, I opt for the bedroom.
“Upstairs please,” I squeak out.
He takes my hand and we slowly walk through the house. I notice that all pictures have been taken down off the walls. I guess that makes sense. What would be the point in the mask if you left pictures of yourself hanging around the house?
The closer we get to the stairs the more my heart begins to pound. I’m pretty sure he can feel my unease because he keeps turning and looking at me. Each step took me closer and closer to revealing the truth… or maybe Lia’s right maybe I don’t have to. Maybe I could just leave the same way I did the last time?
We walk into his room and the click of the door being shut echoes in my head. I wring my hands in front of me.
“So I have a question for you?” He asks.
Turning around, I face him trying to keep my nerves in check. “A question?”
“Yes, you know that thing where you hopefully give me an answer so I can stop thinking about it,” he smirks.
Wow!
“Well that’s a novel idea, but what if it’s an unanswerable question?”
“Hmm,” he pretends to think as he sits on the edge of his bed. “Well the only way to find out is ask right?” He pats the bed next to him.
“I suppose you’re right,” I say quietly as I move to sit next to him.
His face turns serious, all trace of humor gone. “Why did you leave last time?”
“Um,” I start, but unsure how to answer.