Forever and Always (17 page)

“Both our husbands were stubborn, controlling men who treated us more like servants than wives. Why should I feel liberated when my mother feels lost?”

“Because you're stronger and smarter,” Naomi said.

At the moment, Sibyl didn't feel strong or smart. The futures of so many people depended on her. She wondered if she could handle such a responsibility without Logan's help.

“I'll take your mother home with me,” Mae offered. “She needs something to occupy her mind. She can't help you with the bank, but she can work with me in the dress shop. No one knows more about hats or clothes than your mother. She's been critiquing what all of us wear for as long as I can remember.”

Relief washed over Sibyl. “I don't know how to thank you. It's just that I have so much to do right now.”

“Don't apologize. Everybody knows you've undergone your own tragedy. You take care of yourself and your daughter. I'll take care of your mother. I never liked how she forced you to marry Norman, but she is my cousin. I suppose I should forgive her now.”

Sibyl wondered if she'd truly forgiven her mother.

* * *

Logan was ill at ease. He'd been invited to Jared's home for supper. He'd tried to beg off, but neither Jared nor Steve would leave his campsite until he'd agreed. He wondered if Jared's insistence that Laurie and their children wanted to see him hadn't been what changed his mind. He didn't know why children had become so important to him, but getting to know Kitty and the others had been a revelation.

Steve had come to get him. He said he wanted to make sure Logan knew the way to their ranch. Logan suspected they feared he would change his mind at the last minute, something he'd considered at least once an hour since the invitation.

“Is your dog coming?” Steve asked when he noticed a dog trailing them at a distance.

“He goes everywhere with me,” Logan explained.

“Laurie doesn't allow dogs in the house.”

“Trusty stays well out of sight of people he doesn't know. He wouldn't go inside the house if I asked him.”

“The house is new,” Steve told Logan as they rode into the ranch yard. “There was hardly enough space for two people in the old one.” He pointed to a small house sitting some distance away and closer to the river. “Jared turned it into a bunkhouse. He ripped out the floor of the old bunkhouse and made it a barn and henhouse. Coyotes ate the chickens, and everything wanted to eat the pigs.”

“I didn't know ranchers bothered with pigs.”

“Laurie grew up in Kentucky where everybody had their own fresh milk, eggs, and pork. She said she didn't see any reason why she couldn't have them here, too. As long as she cooks like she does, Jared will do anything she wants.”

“The way to a man's stomach…”

“My stomach, too.” Steve stood about six feet with wide shoulders, but he was whipcord thin. “I nearly starved before she came to work for us. I would have married her myself if I'd been older.”

Logan couldn't remember being interested in girls at Steve's age. Looking back, it seemed his whole life had been about work. That was because his father's life had been about work, and Logan had done everything he could to be close to his father, to win his praise as well as his love. He supposed that came from being adopted and feeling he had to earn his father's love, but he had been too young to see that, and it was too late to worry about it now.

“It's a big house,” Steve said, “but Laurie said she wants lots of children.” He laughed. “She only has two, but I think it's enough. I love both of them, but one or the other always needs something. Laurie hardly has time to do anything besides cook and take care of them.” He laughed again. “I think Jared misses the time before they were born.”

The house could have been set just about anywhere in the eastern half of the United States. It was a big rectangle made of wood with a porch across the front and a second story. Jared was waiting at the bottom of the steps. Logan noticed the buggy tied to the hitching post. He supposed it could have been for Laurie's use, but Logan was certain he'd seen it before.

When he and Sibyl went to Camp Verde.

“Glad you didn't change your mind,” Jared said as he came down the steps to greet Logan. “Laurie would have been very disappointed.”

“Is that why you sent Steve to get me? I appreciate the invitation, but a man in my condition is not the ideal guest.”

“I know about your condition, and I don't care. Now come inside. Laurie is anxious to see you again.”

Logan was relieved when Jared didn't offer to help him up the steps, but he got a firm grip on the railing. He was not feeling his best, but he was determined he would do nothing to embarrass himself.

The interior of the house wouldn't cause any excitement in Chicago, but Logan thought it was sensible as well as attractive. The rooms were large and airy with big windows and high ceilings. The wallpaper in the broad hall was decorated with a pattern of green ferns on a white background. The paper in the parlor was covered with bouquets of blue and pink flowers. Not the kind of room he would have expected for a ranch house, but exactly what he would have expected of the woman who rose to greet him. If a woman could be said to exude sexuality, Laurie Smith was a prime example. It in no way changed his preference for Sibyl—who he was not surprised to see sitting across the room—but he'd have had to be dead not to be affected by the lushness of her figure, the sensual mouth, and skin that could cause a peach to cry from envy.

“I'm so glad Jared was able to convince you to come. I've been anxious to see you again.”

If velvet had been able to speak, it would have spoken with Laurie's voice.

“I'm pleased to see you again, too, but I'm afraid I'm going to have to be rude and sit down. I don't travel very well.”

“Do whatever makes you comfortable. Could I get you something to drink?”

“No. I just need to sit. You have a very nice home. Not quite what I expected.”

Laurie laughed. “Jared wanted something smaller, but I was determined to spend as much of my first husband's money as possible.”

“He was Norman Spencer's brother, wasn't he?”

“Yes, and neither one of them thought women could be trusted with money.” She laughed again. “Norman would turn over in his grave if he knew Sibyl was sitting in
his
chair behind
his
desk in
his
bank.”

“You don't have to talk about me like I'm not here,” Sibyl said. “And the only reason I'm doing well is that I have Logan to help me.”

Logan knew Laurie and Sibyl were cousins, but he was sure she'd been invited for him. Did Laurie or her husband have any idea of his feelings for Sibyl? They must not because they couldn't possibly approve.

“Considering Norman never wanted you even to enter the bank, you'd be doing well if you could only handle a deposit or withdrawal,” Laurie said.

Sibyl laughed. “I don't have to do anything as complicated as that. Cassie draws the customers in, and Horace handles their transactions. All I have to do is come up with ideas, which Logan transforms from the far-fetched to the practical.”

Logan was uncomfortable being given so much credit. “That may have been true in the first few days, but not any longer. You should have seen her talk the Camp Verde commander into letting her set up a bank there. He was practically ready to hand over the whole payroll.”

Now it was Sibyl's turn to appear uncomfortable. “You give me too much credit. It was you who talked Jared into dividing his business between the two banks.”

“It seemed a good idea,” Jared said. “To keep peace in the family.”

Everyone laughed but Logan and Steve. Logan didn't know whether he contributed to or against peace in the family, and Steve was distracted by Kitty entering the room while leading Jere.

“You were supposed to keep him in the playroom,” Laurie said.

“I wanted him to meet Logan,” Kitty explained. “He's my friend.”

Logan stiffened. The little boy was hardly more than a baby. He toddled across the room on short, stubby legs. Logan had no idea how the child would react to his face. If the boy was frightened or cried, it would bother his parents more than it would Logan.

“He's not quite two,” Jared said. “I can't understand a thing he says.”

“You don't have to understand,” Laurie said, “because I can.”

Jared rolled his eyes.

“I can't make out most of his words,” Laurie confessed, “but I usually know what he means.”

Jared held out his arms to his son, but Kitty steered him toward Logan. When the child came to a stop, he peered up at Logan and made a sound that no one appeared to understand.

“He wants to talk to you,” Kitty said, “but you're too high up.”

Logan was completely out of his depth. He could understand why the child would want him on his own level. It was something he'd never considered, but he eased out of the chair and settled down on his knees.

“You don't have to do that,” Jared protested.

Logan ignored him. “Is this better?” he asked the boy.

Jere came a step closer. The child had his mother's eyes and his father's hair. It was a toss-up as to who his chubby features would favor when he grew up. To the chagrin of his parents, he reached out and pushed Logan's nose with his stubby index finger. Then he giggled.

“He likes you,” Kitty said.

How she figured that was a mystery to Logan.

“Say something to him.”

Logan had rarely been around children of any age. If he hadn't been able to tell stories, he didn't know what he would have had to say to Kitty and her friends. But what did you say to a child still shy of his second birthday? His tongue lay like a stone in his mouth.

“Ask him what his name is,” Kitty prompted.

Logan did, but the response he got could only be interpreted as
Jere
by someone as besotted as his mother. Jere promptly poked Logan's nose again and giggled.

Laurie got to her feet. “That's enough. I won't have my child poking my guest then laughing about it.”

“I don't mind,” Logan said.

“That's as may be, but I mind very much. It's time he was put to bed. Please excuse me. I need to check the baby, too. Do you want to help me?” she said to Kitty.

“Can I hold the baby?” Kitty asked.

“Of course.” With that assurance, Kitty followed her aunt from the room.

Feeling a little guilty for causing the child to be put to bed early, Logan pushed himself up and back into his seat.

“Don't let it bother you,” Jared said. “I don't know what to say to him, either, so I just pretend he understands me and talk to him like I talk to everyone else.”

“You ought to hear them,” Steve said with a laugh. “Both jabbering away and neither having the vaguest idea what the other is talking about.”

“He makes about as much sense as you half the time,” Jared said to his nephew.

Logan listened, slightly shocked as the men traded insults with all the enjoyment of two children. Logan had loved his father and had enjoyed a close relationship, but they had never done anything like this. He couldn't even imagine it happening.

“They don't mean a word they're saying,” Sibyl whispered. “They couldn't love each other more if they'd been brothers.”

Odd. They were saying very much the kind of things Logan's father and uncle had said to each other, and they fought all the time.

“Stop it,” Sibyl said to Jared. “You're giving Logan a very odd idea of our family.”

“Sorry,” Jared said to Logan. “Laurie says we act like children.”

As it happened, that exchange set the tone for the evening. It seemed everyone had a funny story to tell about the others. Even the characters of Norman and Noah Spencer served as fodder for laughter. Events that must have been difficult to live through took on entirely different aspects as everyone seemed to find humor in just about anything. By the time the evening was over, Logan had probably laughed more than he had in his whole life. An added benefit was that he'd managed to forget his illness for much of the time. He almost felt normal again.

But there was something else, something barely perceived. In some way, they'd managed to make him feel like a part of their community. Despite being a virtual stranger, despite his illness and being disfigured, he belonged. More important, he
felt
like he belonged. How different from Chicago.

The evening came to an end when Laurie rose and said it was time for her to go to bed. “I have to get up and feed the baby while everybody else gets to sleep.” Sibyl and Kitty were going to spend the night, but they had to get up early because it was a long ride into town. “They can't return tonight because it's too far for Jared to make the round trip, and it's not safe for them to make the drive alone at night.”

There was nothing left except for Logan to take his leave. To his surprise, he was reluctant to go. He hadn't felt this good for this long in months.

“Thanks for the invitation,” he said to Laurie. “I was reluctant to come, but I don't know when I've had a more enjoyable evening.”

“I can ride to your camp with you,” Steve offered.

“Thanks, but you have to be in the saddle tomorrow. All I have to do is sit at a desk.”

“You don't have to do that if you don't feel like it,” Sibyl reminded him.

“I'm fine. I'll see you tomorrow.”

“Do you have time for a drink?” Jared asked. “I have a nice bottle of Napoleon brandy I think you'll enjoy.”

Logan had drunk nothing but water once he got ill, but it hadn't made any difference. And he did enjoy a good brandy. “That sounds good.”

They moved to what must be Jared's office, a room that was dominated by dark wood and leather. Logan smiled to himself, thinking how much his father would have enjoyed such a room. He settled into a deep chair even though he might need help getting out of it. The brandy Jared handed him had a deep golden color. He breathed in the heady aroma, letting it arouse his taste buds. Next he took a sip, rolled it around on his tongue, and sighed. “I've missed this.”