From Ashes (16 page)

“Um, I’m just going to put these away . . . ?”

Gage stood up so fast, he had to catch the chair before it toppled to the floor, and he hurried to the kitchen with me to help me put away the groceries. He didn’t say a word as we did it, though more than a few times I caught him looking at me from the corner of his eye. His weird silence confused and unnerved me, so instead of taking Jackie’s advice right then and there, I did the cowardly thing and headed for my room.

“I’m just going to take a shower,” I mumbled as I headed away. When I reached my door I chanced a glance back at him to find him walking slowly toward his own room, his head down and a hand rubbing the back of his neck. “Gage?”

He turned quickly, his green eyes shifting through a range of emotions while his face stayed impassive.

Before I could talk myself out of it again, I walked quickly over to him, rose up on the balls of my feet, wrapped my hands around his head, and brought it down to mine. His arms pulled me into a tight embrace and he smiled through our kiss. It was long and slow and oh so perfect.

“You’re not leaving?” he whispered against my lips.

“I can’t.” I shrugged, hoping he’d understand exactly what that meant.

Gage pressed his lips to mine again and lightly brushed my tongue with his. “God, I was afraid I’d never get to experience that again,” he confessed when we separated.

“Wait, then why were you so distant this morning and when I got back?”

“I’m not Tyler, darlin’, I’ll never push you. I’m taking all my cues from you. But can you please tell me what happened when we got home last night?”

So he
was
waiting for me to do something? God, Jackie was brilliant. “Gage, I was humiliated. Still am, actually.” He wasn’t getting it. “You rejected me, only to remind me soon after that I’ve never been with anyone. It makes sense that you wouldn’t want to be with me because of that, but that doesn’t make it hurt any less.”

“Whoa, wait . . . what? How did you even come up with that?” I opened my mouth to respond but he continued. “Cassidy, you being a virgin doesn’t make me
not
want to be with you. If anything it makes me want you more, so I could claim you as mine. All I want is for your first time to be perfect, and my truck in a parking lot at your friend’s wedding is anything but perfect.”

“I really screwed last night up, didn’t I?”

He laughed and wrapped his arms around me. “I’m just glad you stayed.” He peppered my cheeks and lips with soft kisses.

“Gage, did you really just say you wanted to claim me?”

His husky laugh went all the way to my toes. “I’ve wanted nothing else since you spilled your beer on me.”

“Oh God, we’re back to that again? Are you ever going to let me live that down?”

“Never.” He grinned wickedly as he bent down to kiss me again.

“Gage?” I asked through a breathy moan when he placed an openmouthed kiss on that spot behind my ear. “I’m in control with what we do?”

He brought his head up to look me in the eye. “Completely, Cass, do you want me to stop?”

“No, but if I do want to stop—”

“Then we stop. No questions asked.”

I nodded and sucked my bottom lip into my mouth, thinking about finally making my dreams of him a reality . . . well, some of them anyway.

“Come on, let’s just watch a movie.” He mistook my silence and grabbed my hand, towing me to the couches.

Before we got to the couch, I tugged on his arm and slowly backed up toward his room.

His eyes darkened and he looked quickly between me and his bedroom door. “Cassidy, don’t do this for me.”

“I’m not,” I said softly. “Did you already forget about last night?” I asked with a sly grin.

“You’ll let me know—”

“I’ll tell you when to stop, Gage,” I assured him.

With that, he put his hands on the back of my thighs and picked me up, and walked us to his room, his mouth never leaving mine. He gently laid us down on his bed and kept most of his weight off me while still pressing his body to mine. Bringing his knees up, he put his weight on them and unzipped my thin hoodie before peeling it off me and covering my body with his again. My hands went to the bottom of his shirt and I pulled up until he helped me get it off, depositing it on top of my hoodie on the floor. I traced the contours of his shoulders, chest, and stomach while letting my eyes memorize every square inch of his upper body. He had an amazing body—I already knew that—but to be able to freely touch it, and have the weight of it pressing down on me . . . I couldn’t help but smile as I lifted my head off the pillows to kiss him again. He met my kiss greedily and soon I was shivering when he moved lower and his teeth lightly grazed my throat. Arching my back to press my chest into him, I silently willed him to touch me. His kisses alone were making my insides heat, but I wanted more. It took me another minute to realize he wouldn’t do anything until I told him. I still couldn’t believe he was putting me in control.

“Gage,” I said around his mouth, and he just moved it to kiss along my jaw.

“Tell me what you want, darlin’.”

“Undress me.”

I was expecting him to rip my clothes off, but God, what he did was so. Much. Better. The first to go was my shirt, and as he slid it up inch by inch, his mouth and tongue followed the hem of my shirt. When it was finally off, he captured my mouth with his and kissed me until I was completely breathless. Then he tortured me the exact same way with my jeans, placing hot, openmouthed kisses all the way down my hips, thighs, calves, and feet. I knew I should have been at the very least a little embarrassed by the way I was writhing beneath him, but I just couldn’t bring myself to care right now. He hadn’t even touched me yet and already I was shuddering with pleasure. He retraced his way up my body and, without lifting his head from my upper stomach, brought his hands under my back and unhooked my bra, slid the straps off my shoulders, and pulled it from my body.

Placing a hand on either side of me, he lifted himself off me and shamelessly studied every inch of me. One hand came up slowly and touched down on my lower stomach toward my hip. As soon as the tips of his fingers were on my skin I knew where they were, what he was looking at, and my body instantly locked up. I’d never let anyone other than Tyler purposefully see my scars, but I didn’t exactly have a choice since he was the one who always took care of me. How could I have forgotten about the hideous lines marking my body?
Especially
at a time like this. I didn’t want Gage to see this part of me.
God, I should have waited until it was completely dark in the room!
He’d seen the bruises for a brief moment when I moved here, but I’m sure he hadn’t even noticed these the night I walked here from Tyler’s. I preferred it that way. There were only two outcomes to this: disgust and pity. Neither of which I could live with coming from him. My hands blurred as one tried to push him away and the other stupidly tried to cover the biggest scar on my torso.

“Stop.” Gage’s voice came out so softly I almost didn’t hear it.

“Please let me put a shirt on,” I begged shakily.

“No, babe.” He gently but effectively pinned my hands against the bed. “I want to see you.”

“Gage—” I sucked in a deep breath as he dipped his head and gently placed his lips on the right side of the large scar and slowly made his way to the left.

Without looking back up at me, he broke the contact with my skin until he came upon another, slightly smaller scar and bent to kiss there as well. Over and over, Gage kissed my stomach, thighs, arms, and shoulders until every scar on my front made by my mom and stepdad had been covered. When he was done, he resumed his earlier study. Gage said something I couldn’t make out, and after another minute looked directly into my eyes, his green ones dark and full of want. “You’re perfect, Cassidy.”

G
AGE

OH MY GOD, how is she mine?
I couldn’t have taken my eyes away from her even if I wanted to, which I definitely didn’t. Her small body lay there; the only part moving was her chest, which was rapidly rising and falling as she watched me look at her. “So beautiful,” I muttered, and she was. Every part of her, scars and all, was absolutely beautiful.

My eyes raked over her perfectly curved hips and flat stomach leading up to a tiny waist and perfect breasts.
Perfect.
There was no other word for this girl lying underneath me. How could I have wasted a second of my time on any other woman than her? And yet, I’d never paid a tenth of the attention to them that I was giving to Cassidy. Every other woman had been a means to the end result, but I could have spent the rest of the night simply looking at Cassidy, and it wouldn’t have been long enough. My jeans were uncomfortably tight, but I resisted the urge to let them join the rest of the clothes on the floor and continued my visual exploration of her. I glanced over her small shoulders, dipping into her neck and up her throat before looking at her full lips, swollen from kissing and partially open. And finally, finally, I reached her gold eyes, bright with unshed tears.
Mine.
This beautiful girl is mine.

“You’re perfect, Cassidy.”

A sound that was a mix between a laugh and a sob left her and she tore her arms from under my hands and threw them around my neck, burying her head in the crook of my neck. She was shaking slightly and I ran my hand through her long, thick hair.

“Are you okay?” I asked when she still didn’t let me go.

Her face flashed before mine for only a second before disappearing again down my chest, where she began to place damn near torturous openmouthed kisses. But that second was enough; her eyes were still wet but she had the softest, most beautiful smile I’d ever seen on her. It was more than just my smile, and I wanted to see it again.

With a gentle tug of her hair, I brought her lips back to mine. They moved against each other for a short time and I about thanked God out loud when she arched her back and guided my head to her chest. Her hands moved to the top of my jeans when I brought my mouth to the swell of her breast and I groaned against her skin at the extra space she’d given me by undoing my jeans and pulling them down slightly.

“Touch me,” she urged, and I once again forced myself to move slowly.

My fingers had just glided over the soft cotton of her underwear and curled around the top, ready to push them down, when the doorbell rang quickly three times. “Ignore it,” I growled against her breast.

“ ’Kay.” Her voice was low and breathy and a shiver went up her body when my fingers trailed over her heat as I pulled down her underwear. The bell sounded again and her body locked up. “The guys are coming for the game and dinner!”

I almost told her that they would get the hint when I remembered I’d given Adam a key after the whole Popsicle Cassidy incident.
Shit.
“Adam has a key,” I said in a rush just as I heard the front door open and voices enter the house. With a frustrated growl, I kissed her hard one more time, jumped off her, and had my shirt back on in a few seconds. Adjusting my painfully hard erection and buttoning up my pants again, I looked back to see a flushed and frustrated Cassidy watching me from the bed. “I’ll tell them to go.”

“No, it’s fine. They’ll be gone later tonight.” There was so much promise in that last sentence; I knew it’d have to be enough to get me through the game.

I nodded and opened the door slightly so I could slip out without anyone seeing in if they were near the hall. Glad I did, because Ethan was just starting to walk down it.

“Hey, man, we thought you guys weren’t here.”

“Nah, I was just busy. Anyone want a beer?” I called as I walked uncomfortably into the kitchen, hoping to get their focus away from my bedroom door. It was a futile attempt though, because as soon as a fully clothed Cassidy stepped out with her somewhat messed-up hair and red cheeks, the living room went completely silent.

My beautiful girl straightened her shoulders and walked confidently into the kitchen, keeping her eyes on me the entire time. “Any requests for dinner tonight?” she asked when she finally looked at them. I saw her cheeks flush even darker, but she kept her chin up as they all gawked at her.

Ethan glanced at me with a sly grin and mouthed,
Fucking finally,
before looking back at Cass. “Uh, can you make your inside-out burgers?”

“Sure.” She glanced at the rest of the guys, who still weren’t talking, but Adam was smiling at her. Trying to avoid the stares, she set about getting out a massive amount of snacks for us. When she pulled all the ingredients out of the fridge for the burgers and put them on the counter, I stepped up behind her and put a hand on each side of her.

“You okay, darlin’?” If the guys didn’t start talking soon,
I
was going to get uncomfortable.

“I’m great.” Her head tilted back and she smiled widely at me; her hand came up around my neck and brought my head down for a slow kiss in front of everyone. Knowing how much she hated showing affection with Ty in front of anyone, that kiss meant the damn world.

I smiled down at her and kissed her softly once more before straightening up and facing the guys and a gleefully happy Dana and Jackie, who must have come in sometime after I’d pinned Cassidy against the counter. They shuffled past me toward the kitchen and I grabbed the remote out of Jake’s hand and turned on the TV.

Tossing the remote back at his stomach, I said, loud enough for him and Grant to hear me, “You come over to watch the game or stare at my girl? ’Cause if it’s the latter, y’all can leave.”

“You and Cassi?” Jake finally asked with raised brows.

“Yeah, me and Cass. If you have a problem with it, you can take that as another invitation to get the hell out.”

“I’m good,” he said, and I looked up at Grant, who had just pulled his eyes away from Cassidy and given me a satisfied smirk before settling into one of the couches.

I
FINISHED SAYING
bye to Grant and Jake after practically throwing them out of the house. Everyone else had left an hour before, and I wasn’t dumb enough to not realize they were staying to piss me off. I’d had a hard-on practically the entire night and I couldn’t stop touching Cassidy in some way or another. We’d been anxiously waiting for everyone to leave, and those two settled in further and started flipping through the guide on my TV when the game was done. Trying to give them a hint, Cass and I had done the dishes and stood in the kitchen talking after we were done. When I realized they weren’t going on their own, I made sure to let them know their time was up.