Guarded Heart (Dubicki's) (4 page)

“Hey, Jesse, can you do me a favor?” asked Kelsey while she
busily bused the empty glasses from the bar in an effort to clean up. It was
almost closing time.

“Sure, Kelsey, what’s up?”

“See that girl with long hair in the high heels over there.
I think she’s had a couple too many drinks and may need help outside,” Kelsey
said, pouring old beer from some abandoned pint glasses. “I asked all the
servers what they gave her, assuming one had over-served her, but no one seems
to remember. It’s been a busy night. I know you’re not on duty tonight,
technically, but my other bouncers are busy and I need you. Anyway, she seems a
bit unsteady on her feet. I’m surprised she hasn’t toppled over yet in those
shoes.”

Jesse had worked as a bouncer on and off at Dubicki’s for
the last few years. He could pinch hit any position in the bar, but, because of
his size, he was most frequently asked to do the duty of bouncer. He didn’t
mind helping. He turned around to follow his sister’s gaze to the girl that
needed help and blinked in surprise when he saw it was Carissa.
This should
prove interesting
, he thought as he made his way toward her.

***

Carissa couldn’t believe it. She must be drunk.
How did
that happen?
She liked to be in control, and she’d only allowed herself to
have a little bit of fun.

Right before she left Dubicki’s, she accidentally smacked
the glass of some random stranger off his table on the way to the ladies room.
She quickly apologized to him and decided go home before she got sick or
embarrassed herself any more. She could barely make her way to the bathroom
without tripping and figured she’d better head home after she splashed some
water on her face. Hopefully, the fresh air would make her nausea go away.

“Hi,” said a deep but gentle voice from behind her as she
stumbled out the door and into the parking lot.

She jumped in surprise and turned around, losing her footing
as she did it. They were under a bright light in the parking lot, and she went
to shield her eyes as if from the sun as she took in the person that was behind
her. It was him. Jesse. The hottie she’d met at the bar earlier.
Oh, God
.
She was mortified. She probably looked like a complete mess, and she wished she
could disappear, but her rolling belly wouldn’t let her.

“Hi,” Carissa said as she hiccupped. She covered her mouth
with her hand and tried unsuccessfully to suppress a giggle of embarrassment.

“You look like you could use some help. Can I help you,
Carissa?”

Carissa blew the bangs out of her face as she haphazardly
fought to keep her composure.

“I’m fine, thank you,” she said in a very staccato tone as
she swayed a little more with each syllable.

“Actually, Carissa, it’s my job to help you,” he softly said
to her as he lowered himself to sit next to her on the cement step in the bar
parking lot. Carissa had shifted herself there after she’d fallen.

“What do you mean it’s your job to help me?” Carissa asked
him.

“My name is Jesse. Jesse Dubicki. My family owns this bar,
and I have been a bouncer on and off here for a while. My sister Kelsey is at
the bar tonight and noticed you seemed you were having trouble. Her other
bouncers were busy, so she asked me.”

“Oh.”

“How did you get here, Carissa? I need to make sure you get
home okay.”

“Thanks for the offer, Jesse. I don’t live far and can walk
home by myself just fine.”

“At least let me walk you?” Jesse asked, although it was
more of a statement.

“Thanks for the offer, Jesse but like I said--I don’t even
know you,” she said as she struggled to her feet and turned to walk away.

“Carissa, wait. I know you don’t know me, but I’m not only
doing this because I work here sometimes,” Jesse said hesitantly. “I know you
caught me looking at you a few times tonight because I find you attractive. I’d
like you to think about letting me get to know you a little; maybe not tonight
because I know you are a little bit out of it. But I hope you will at least let
me start with a walk home tonight. Don’t get me wrong. I’m a gentleman. I do
things the right way, and I would never take advantage of you. I just want to
make sure you’re safe.”

Carissa’s mind was racing, or at least trying to. Her
thoughts felt murkier with each moment that passed.
He likes me. Shit.

“Jesse, I appreciate your offer, but I can take care of
myself.”
Hiccup.

“What about my offer to get to know each other? Will you at
least think about it? And Carissa, I mean this in the nicest way, but I have to
make sure you get home safe. So I’m going to walk you or I’m going to drive you
or call a cab for you. The choice is yours.”

“Fine,” she said, her speech audibly slurred while silently
fighting to maintain her balance in her high heels.

Carissa turned in an effort to walk away, internally hoping
she’d lose him. He might be a hottie, but no good ever came of her
relationships with men. Within a few steps later, her heel got caught in the
sidewalk, and she tripped. She groaned as she fell to the sidewalk which she
came into contact with hard and fast. Her stomach was not responding well to
all the activity, and suddenly she felt sick. Very sick. The last thing she
remembered was heaving in the grass on her hands and knees. Then everything
went black.

***

She woke in the pitch black, and her head was spinning. She
let out a sound that was somewhere between a groan and a mewling noise. Then
she felt someone stir beside her and screamed as she tried to gain ground by
moving herself away from whatever or whoever it was. Having a stranger in her
bed brought back memories. Bad ones. She used to have night terrors and did not
want anyone near her when that happened. It hadn’t happened in years, or so she
thought. She didn’t want the night they resurfaced to be tonight.

“Carissa, it’s me, Jesse. I’m sorry to scare you,” he said
as he reached out to place a hand on her forearm to assure her she was safe and
he was there.

Her heart started to race with the realization that she was
in a stranger’s home. Suddenly the previous night’s events started to replay in
her mind right up until she fell on the grass. She couldn’t remember anything
after that. She suddenly felt ashamed and sick. She wanted to be in her own
bed, in her own home.

“What the hell am I doing here, Jesse?” she said, the pitch
of her voice rising as she wiped her eyes in disbelief.

“Carissa, try to calm down. You were sick and passed out. I
didn’t exactly know where you live, so I brought you back to my place. I live
in the apartment just above Dubicki’s, so it’s not like we traveled far.”

Her head started to pound as she began to digest her
irresponsible behavior. To add to it, now she felt a bit violated. Her mouth
started to taste sour, and she nearly choked as the memories of her past rose
to the surface. She didn’t want to get sick again.

“Carissa, how well did you know that guy that bought you
drinks at the bar?”

“What?” Carissa’s head felt fuzzy. Why was he asking her
questions?

“My sister Kelsey was at the bar all night. She thought
you’d had too much to drink. She asked the staff to see if someone had
over-served you and found that you only had one beer after the first round of
shots. That means two drinks. That’s not normally enough to make anyone black
out. We think you may have been roofied.”

Oh, God. Could this night get any worse?
She had to
get out of there. She felt ashamed, sick and alone. She’d have to put being
grateful that this guy likely saved her from more than just passing out in the
street for later.

It was sweet of Jesse Dubicki to have voiced his interest.
It wasn’t going to happen, though. Now he’d seen her at her worst. Just because
he looked out for her the night before didn’t mean he would always be a good
guy. Men that started out as good men still ended up being abusers. No way was
she going to find out if he was one of the good guys. Guys like the one he was
appearing to be only existed in movies.
No, thank you.
She decided to
try to salvage whatever dignity she had left and get the hell out of there.

Carissa jumped out of bed and quickly searched around for
her things. A thought suddenly occurred to her.

“Did we…?”

“No. Don’t worry. I have enough respect for a woman never to
take advantage of her like that, not that I can say the same for that asshole
that drugged you. He better hope that I never see him again,” Jesse said,
slamming his closed fist into his hand. “I realized when I took you up here you
may not react well, but it felt like my only choice at the time.”

Carissa fumbled around for her things and couldn’t find one
of her earrings, but at that point she didn’t care. She had to get out of
there.

“I appreciate what you did for me, Jesse. I do. I just have
to go.”

She quickly grabbed her purse and ran towards the door.

“Carissa, wait!” he yelled and ran after her.

She continued to run, but as he got closer to her she
quickly turned around and glared at him with her fists balled at her side.

“Jesse Dubicki, I didn’t ask you to rescue me. I’m a big
girl, and I can take care of myself. I would have been just fine if you would
not have gone all caveman on me and carried me up here like I was some sort of
helpless piece of trash,” Carissa said, opening the door. “What did you think?
That I was going to roll over and want to sleep with you in exchange for you
being my savior? I mean, come on, dude. I’m not that kind of girl. I appreciate
what you did for me, but whatever else you have in mind, I’m not interested in.
Get over yourself and LEAVE ME ALONE!”

Carissa stormed down the stairs and out onto the sidewalk.
She started running and didn’t stop until she was half-way to her apartment on
foot.

She took a moment and bent forward to rest her hands on her
knees as she caught her breath. Her cheeks burned with shame as she thought of
what she must have looked like the night before. She wasn’t entirely sure if
her anger was at Jesse or herself or the guy that drugged her, but she’d be
damned if she was going to give Jesse the time of day after what had
transpired. She’d had enough of men trying to take advantage of her in her life
and was not going to let that start happening then. Her mind was running out of
space to process anymore abuse. The fact that she’d gotten lucky that
apparently no one had tried to rape her meant she dodged a bullet.

Hopefully, I’ll never see him again,
she thought as
she tried to run again. In reality, she hobbled down the street awkwardly on
what was now one pair of high-heeled shoes with one broken heel. She tried to
regain some semblance of decorum as she dug for the lip gloss in her little
purse. Carissa always felt better when she had her lipstick on. Every crisis in
life required lipstick or lip gloss, no matter a girl’s outward appearance. She
held her head high and squared her shoulders--it was the principle of it
all--and hobbled her way back home.

Chapter 6

“Good job, Jesse. Let’s transition to takedowns.”

Jesse had been working out all morning, and it was time to work
with sparring partners.

Pablo rubbed the back of his neck as he paced outside the
practice ring. They were really hitting it hard since Jesse’s fight with Damon
Velasquez was getting closer. Jesse was doing really well in his division, but
they could never be too prepared.

Damon Velasquez was also a top fighter, but most of his
matches were on the West Coast. He was expanding to other areas of the country
in an effort to elevate his status from the Champion of the West to being an
overall champion. He was good at winning and was known for fighting dirty. Not
dirty enough to break the rules, but he had ways of crawling under his opponent’s
skin both inside and outside the ring.

Pablo got the distinct feeling that Velasquez was one of
those guys who probably tortured small animals as a kid. He’d probably find a
way to kill people regardless, and, in MMA, it was somewhat legal if done within
the parameters of the regulations of the game. In interviews, Velasquez
constantly bragged about how he was determined to beat his opponents into
submission. He made it his mission to make them feel like they wanted to die;
every time he spoke about it, he followed it with a small cackle that sounded
like it was laced with a hint of evil.

Later on in the locker room, Pablo said, “Jesse, what’s been
eating at you man? You seem like you’re distracted lately. Not only am I
concerned for you as a friend, but we can’t afford this with this match coming
up.”

Jesse sighed.

“A couple of days ago at Dubicki’s, Kelsey was at the bar
and saw this girl that seemed to be having a problem walking. Kelsey asked me
to help her. I had felt drawn to the girl all night, and it was an awkward way
of meeting her, but hey, whatever works, right?”

Pablo shook his head as Jesse continued.

“Well, she ended up pretty much passing out in the street
outside of Dubicki’s, so I put her over my shoulder and carried her upstairs to
my place. While she was passed out, Kelsey came up to tell me that she had
deduced that the girl had probably been roofied. When the girl woke up, I
almost felt like she accused me of violating her in some way. I mean, I saved
her from God knows what.”

Jesse took a breath and wondered if telling Pablo all of
this was going to help him or hurt him.

“I had also told her I was interested in her earlier in the
night. It was disappointing. I didn’t expect her to run into my arms, but I
liked her. I thought I could forget about it, but it’s been weighing on me. I
want to see her again, but I’m scared she doesn’t want anything to do with me.
Plus, there’s the small detail that I have no idea what her last name is or how
to get a hold of her.”

Pablo paced the floor outside of the ring. He muttered to
himself in Spanish. Jesse knew if Pablo was muttering to himself in Spanish
that he was about to find out what those words meant in English.
Fuck.

Pablo walked up to the ring and placed his hands on his
hips, authoritatively. “Man, Jesse, of all times…. Really! Get over it, dude.
She’s just a woman. They are a dime a dozen. You are not in a position to be in
a relationship right now. It would just interfere with your current goals of
becoming a champion and potentially going pro.”

“I know what my goals are, Pablo. You don’t have to be a
dick about it. You asked.”

Jesse slammed his locker shut and headed for the door.

Pablo walked over to the speed bag, pounding it in
frustration. As Jesse was walking out, Pablo yelled, “Well, if it’s so damn
important to you, Dubicki, then go find her and let’s get back to work!”

Right.
That would be a great idea if he had any idea
of what her last name was. Or where to find her.