Guarded Heart (Dubicki's) (9 page)

Jesse moved a bit closer to her and put his hand on her back
as she rocked herself.

“I’m glad you feel like you can trust me. I’m glad you
didn’t run from me again. I care about you, Carissa. You have brought something
to the surface in me that I had forgotten even existed. I put the possibility
of romance on the backburner until I saw you. And, somehow, everything has
changed for me. I want to be in your life, and I want you in mine. I am yours,
if you want me.”

Carissa looked up at him with tears in her eyes and climbed
onto his lap. “I don’t know what the hell you see in me, but of course I want
you.”

She leaned her face down to him, and they kissed and cuddled
for a while.

Finally, he stood and said he should go.

“Stay with me,” she said, and he followed her back to the
bedroom. “Will you just lay with me? I know it sounds silly, but I just really
want to be held right now.”

She looked so fragile to him. He climbed into bed next to
her and just held her and stroked her hair as she quietly wept against his
chest. He knew that she needed this, and he cradled his newfound treasure to
his chest, silently praying that she had somehow found a way to make peace with
her past.

Chapter 14

Carissa dabbed on her last bit of lipstick and put on an
armful of bangle bracelets. She had a date with Jesse to go over to his place
and spend some time with him before they went downstairs to Dubicki’s. That
night he was going to meet Dana, who was bringing her boyfriend Kyle, and they
were all going to have a double date of sorts.

She still couldn’t believe that she had a boyfriend. She
looked back now and saw that her life had been a constant state of damage
control, trying to keep away from all men so they never could hurt her again. She
realized that may not have been wise, but it was what she had to do at the
time.

She was proud of herself. The first sign of intimacy in the
past would have almost certainly meant failure because she would have run
before she would have let anyone see her vulnerable again. Not this time. Jesse
Dubicki was worth her taking a risk. He’d been such a gentleman to her; she
couldn’t believe she’d been stupid enough to consider never wanting to see him
again. She was glad they’d been given a second chance.

She was falling for him. She never thought she’d fall in
love, really, but she was starting to feel like that was what was going on. He
was occupying space in her head, and she liked it that way. The way he cared
for her and didn’t judge her past. The way that he told her he’d wait for her
to be ready. The way he kissed her and didn’t pressure her for anything more.
She wasn’t sure what she had done to deserve it, but, thanks to Dana’s many pep
talks, she was starting to realize that it was possible to have good things
happen without something bad happening. All her life, she’d thought that if
something good happened, then something bad was just around the corner to even
out the scales. She was learning to let go of that mentality and just enjoy the
moment.

Not only did he want to get to know her friend that was
really the only family she had, he wanted to be near her and with her as much
as she was willing. He had another fight next week, and she was looking forward
to his first match that she was his girlfriend. He told her he’d get her a
custom made jersey for her to wear that said
Jesse “The Patriot” Dubicki
on it. She’d never been one to wear sports jerseys, but just thinking of his
name on her chest woke her senses enough for her to notice the heat rising from
her core that was becoming more common since she met Jesse. She couldn’t wait
until after their date. The anticipation of him touching her body, whether it
was that day or soon, was driving her mad.

She pulled up to Dubicki’s, and Jesse was waiting at the top
of the stairs for her.
God, he is gorgeous.
Just the site of him drove
her senses wild. She nearly sprinted up the stairs to close the gap between
them.

“Hi,” she said as he pulled her close to kiss her.

“Hi, gorgeous,” he said as he looked down at her, his face
inches from hers.

“Hi, handsome,” she said, her eyes darkening with her desire
with him.

“What do you want to do for the next hour before Dana and
her boyfriend get here?”

“Hmmm, I don’t know,” she said, and he laughed.

He quickly pulled her in the door, and they took off to his
room like they were in a race.

When they reached his room, they were both laughing, and he
caught her from behind as if she were as light as a feather; to him, she was.
Suddenly, the energy shifted, as did the laughter, as he turned her around and
kissed her, and he lifted her in the air above him. He gently placed her on the
bed. He slowly sat down beside her and placed his open hand against her cheek
and just caressed her face and her hair. She smiled sweetly at him and leaned
over to kiss his hand. He lowered his head to hers, still sitting beside her as
she lay in the bed, and touched his lips lightly to hers. A small song of
desire came from the back of her throat as she lifted her body in an effort to
be closer to him.

“Do you want something, Carissa?” he asked her.

“You, Jesse. I want you. To touch me.”

“Where?” he asked.

“Here,” she said as she looked down at her chest and played
with the top button of her blouse.

He answered by lowering his head to her chest. He let his
face linger outside her clothing. He loved the smell of her, loved feeling her
desire for him. As he rubbed his cheeks and face against her blouse, he felt
her hard nipples through her clothing and reached his hand up to gently touch
her outside her shirt. When she started to moan with impatience, he decided to
make her wait a little longer. He liked seeing her excited and wanting him,
but, most of all, he didn’t want to rush her.

“Carissa, are you sure you’re ready for this?” he gently
asked her.

She gently bit her bottom lip and nodded her consent. Next,
she unbuttoned her blouse all the way and completely exposed her bra. He felt
so honored that she would expose herself to him and allow herself to be
vulnerable to giving this a chance. He wanted to treasure every moment.

“Jesse, what are you waiting for?” she gently pressed him.

“I don’t mean to make you wait. I just want to treasure
every moment of this, Carissa. You’re beautiful,” he said as he lowered his
mouth to the chest that she’d just exposed to him.

She wore a bra that was so thin it was nearly see-through,
and it turned him on to see her beautiful breasts nearly exposed to him. Her
nipples were so hard that they nearly broke through the fabric. He lowered his
mouth to one of her nipples and started to lick it outside the fabric. When
they both could take no more, he gently eased the bra to the side and took her
breast in his mouth. He gently suckled each of her breasts and felt his cock
grow so hard that it was ready to erupt from his shorts.

Still, he wanted to take his time with her. He raised
himself up on his arm above her chest and just looked at her. He could get lost
in her eyes and felt like he could be content just watching her. She was
looking back at him, her eyes shining with emotion. He lowered his mouth to
hers and let himself kiss her. She responded with all the emotion he thought he
had seen in her eyes.

When they finally pulled themselves from the kiss, Jesse
took his hand and gently caressed her face. He kissed his way along her jawline
to her ear. He gently licked and nipped at her ear. The sounds she made told
him she liked it. He kissed his way down to her neck, stopping to lick her neck
gently on the way down to her chest.

When he got to her chest, he gave more attention to her
breasts, gently suckling each one before he moved on, trailing kisses down her
belly. She gently moaned in anticipation of what was to come.

When he finally arrived near her sex, he removed her pants
and panties. When he did, he could see her glistening mound and wanted to taste
her so badly. He wasn’t going to without her telling him she wanted it, though.

“Carissa, do you like this?”

“Yes,” she moaned.

“What do you want me to do next, Carissa?”

“I want you to taste me.”

“Where do you want me to taste you?” he said to her, looking
down at her sex, a smile in his eyes.

She trailed her hand down to her wet entrance and parted it
slightly for him. He’d never wanted anything so badly. He lowered himself to
her mound and just savored the musky and sweet scent of her before he kissed
her just outside of her sweet spot. She moaned in anticipation.

He put his tongue inside of her sweet mound; she gripped her
hand on his head in encouragement. He let his tongue find her sweet clit and
taste every inch of it. She was writhing in excitement, bucking in frustration
at the patience he was using in getting to her center.

When he was satisfied with tasting her, he settled into her
sex and rhythmically licked her center. She responded with a high-pitched
sound, telling him she was close. He wanted to taste her cum and increased the
pressure of his tongue on her clit just lightly. It nearly unhinged her. She
called his name as she exploded for him. He could taste every bit of her, and
he loved it.

He crawled back up to be near her as she came down from the
high of her climax.

“Jesse, that was amazing.”

He put his arms around her and was content at the thought
that she was satisfied. As if she read his mind, she said, “I hope you’re not
done yet.”

“Are you sure, Carissa? I wanted to take it slow with you. I
know you haven’t always been treated right.”

She silenced him by placing her finger on his lips. She
lifted her hips in anticipation of wanting him inside of her. He stood up to
undress, and, while he did, he welcomed the opportunity to take a moment to
look at her. She was so beautiful with her naked body exposed to him, wanting
him. He wondered how he got so lucky.

Before he let his jeans drop to the floor, he pulled a
condom out of his pocket and put it on. He saw Carissa watching him with
anticipation and finally joined her on the bed. He lowered his mouth to hers
and kissed her playfully before positioning himself over her. He rubbed his
hard length over her wet folds and teased her a bit; somehow, he couldn’t
resist. He didn’t know how long he was going to last that first time, but he
was going to do his best to make sure they both enjoyed it. She made such
delicious sounds in anticipation of him, and he loved every second of it.
Finally, he allowed his cock to slide into her slowly. She was so tight around
him, and he knew that if he moved too quickly, it would be over too quickly to
truly satisfy either one of them.

She reached her hands down between their legs. She touched
him as he was in her, and then she touched herself. She let her fingers slowly
drift to her swollen clit while he slowly moved in and out of her. He wouldn’t
be able to hold on much longer if she kept doing that. As if she read his
thoughts, she took the finger that had been on her clit and moved it up to his
mouth. He was mesmerized as he suckled the finger that had been on her sweet
center. His thrust became quicker, and she let out a yell as her body convulsed
as she came. He lost himself as her wetness tensed around him and called her name
as he found his release.

***

A little while later, they were on their way downstairs to
Dubicki’s. They walked into the bar hand-in-hand and greeted the locals and
staff that Jesse knew. His sister was off that night, but Adam was there
working a late shift for someone that had called in sick.

“Hey, Adam,” Jesse said to his brother as they made their
way through the bar.

“Hey, guys. What’s going on tonight?” Adam said as he poured
a beer for one of the servers.

“Not too much. We came down here to meet up with one of
Carissa’s friends and her boyfriend,” Jesse said.

“Ah, a double date. It sounds like you two are getting
serious,” Adam said with a hint of mischief in his eye.

“Whatever, dude. We both know that you knew it was serious
the minute I introduced her to my family. Give Steph and the baby my love,”
Jesse said as he tugged Carissa’s hand behind him to get away.

The two brothers had always butted heads; Carissa remembered
him saying that. She’d often wished she’d had siblings and, even though they had
their moments, was envious of the clear bond between the siblings in the
Dubicki family.

“Bye, Adam!” she called and waved back at him with her free
hand.

He waved at her and said goodbye as they surged on in their
quest to find her friends. After searching the bar unsuccessfully for Dana,
Carissa remembered that Dana’s new guy Kyle smoked the last time she’d seen
them together. Dubicki’s had just had a patio put in that year because so many
competing businesses had them. The bar was on the Mississippi River; it may not
have been much to look at, but it was a water view, and Kelsey had convinced
Adam to make the investment. The tables outside quickly became popular in the
summer and nicer weather. The new patio tables were on the opposite side of
Jesse’s stairway and apartment, but he still caught some extra noise from the
patio when it was nice out.

“Come on, Jesse, they might be outside,” she said as she
took the lead and led him to the patio.

As she suspected, they quickly spotted Dana with her new
boyfriend, who was smoking a cigarette as they approached their table. Their
table was essentially a brown picnic table with an umbrella.

“Hey, woman!” Dana waved and hollered to her as she jumped
up to hug Carissa and Jesse.

“Hi, Kyle. Nice to see you again,” Carissa said to Dana’s
new boyfriend.

“Yeah, you too, Carissa,” he said with the cigarette butt
dangling from his mouth as he held out his hand to shake hers.

She shook his hand, and then turned to introduce Jesse.

“This is Jesse. Jesse, this is Dana and Kyle,” Carissa said
as they all shook hands.

Jesse gave her a priceless look when he shook hands with
Kyle, and it looked as if his cigarette ash was so long it might drop off into
Jesse’s palm. Carissa tried not to giggle and averted her eyes to avoid laughing.

Jesse and Carissa sat together on the opposite side of the
table from Dana and Kyle, and they all decided to order a round of drinks. Dana
suggested that since they were at Dubicki’s, they should all order a signature
drink. Dubicki’s had five of them: the Sharp Tongue, the Tongue & Cheek,
the Loose Tongue, the Tongue Twister, and a shot called the Tongue Piercing.
They all ordered one, and Kyle ordered two so they could have all five. He also
voiced that he liked the idea of double-fisting his drinks.

Dana and Kyle kissed, and it turned into what seemed like a
little make-out session right across the table from them.
Awkward.
Carissa smiled at Jesse apologetically. Jesse made a funny face at her while
the couple continued kissing, and she laughed. The other two didn’t flinch, so
Jesse brought his face to hers and said, “If ya can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em.”