His Ever After (Love Square) (32 page)

“You see a therapist?” She says in shock.

“Yeah. I don’t make a habit of telling people about her, but she’s really helped me get past what happened with Brooke, letting go of Sam and working through my feelings for you. I think you’d like her. We can even go together, if it would make you feel better.”

“Wow. You’re really serious about this, aren’t you?”

“I am. You are the most important thing to me. And I just want to say that this is the last time we talk about shit like Brooke and Sam in this bed. From this point forward, it’s just you and me. Yeah?”

“Yeah. I love you, Jacob Matthews,” Kara whispers against my lips, wrapping her body around mine. Her head rests on my chest, and I feel my heart swell with happiness.

“I love you, too, Kara Andrews.” I reach over and turn off the light. It isn’t long before Kara’s weight settles into me. Once it does, I close my eyes and fall asleep with a smile on my face.

Chapter Twenty-three

Kara

I stretch and arch my body before snuggling into the warmth behind me. Jacob’s arm wraps around my middle and pulls me closer. His head buries in my hair and sniffs. I laugh at how obsessed he is with my hair and lace my fingers with his.

“Good morning,” I murmur contentedly.

“Mmm, that it is.” His lips move whisper soft across my neck, almost like a light breeze.

I would love nothing more than to make love to him right now. I’m just afraid that I’ll freeze up again. Jacob’s therapist, Dr. Spears, told me that it’s natural to feel this way, and I’ll know when I’m ready to move forward. I just hope it’s soon. I miss having that connection with Jacob. I know he is encouraging me to go at my own pace, but I’m afraid he will start looking elsewhere for affection if it takes much longer.

The rational side of my brain tells me that I’m crazy for thinking that way. But the other half of my brain continually taunts me with the knowledge that men are sexual creatures by nature and will seek it out, sometimes even unconsciously. Dr. Spears says that rationale stems from watching my parents be in an open marriage for so long. That my psyche thinks that if love and commitment weren’t enough for them, then it won’t be enough for Jacob. She even attributed those feelings as to why I’ve been so selective with my lovers. She claims I’ve been trying to behave opposite of how my parents did when I was in my formative years. God, I hate when shrinks know best.

Watching my parents have a revolving door of lovers between them over the years really did a number on me. I didn’t want that for myself when I grew up. I wanted someone who would want me and only me. Of course, the first relationship I finally opened myself up to was exactly like my parents. I cringe remembering how foolish I was back then.

I also try not to remember what a man whore Jacob was early on in our so called relationship. He basically sent me away after sex, went on to have a smorgasbord of lovers, offered me a threesome, and then hit on me when he still smelled of sex from another woman. Sometimes I wonder if I’m crazy to still be with him. I just try to believe that we are meant to be and put the rest aside. It’s just really hard to do sometimes.

I’ve been seeing Dr. Spears for almost two months now. Jacob has even sat in a few sessions with me. I think it’s important for him to hear my thoughts and fears. While I still keep some stuff for myself, I want to make sure that we know where each other are coming from. I don’t want a repeat of our last disaster. I was honestly ready to leave him for what turned out to be no reason at all. If I had just voiced my concerns, the rift between us wouldn’t have gotten that big.
Lesson learned.

“I can’t believe tonight is Brad and Sophie’s engagement party.” I turn into his arms and wrap mine around his shoulders, pulling his body into me.

“I know. It’s about time the sorry ass put a ring on her finger. We should probably get up and get moving. I promised Brad we’d be early. I have a feeling they are asking people to stand up in the wedding before everyone else gets there.” He kisses my nose and executes a pushup to get out of bed. I watch in fascination as he walks across the room towards the bathroom. He is one fine male specimen. The way each muscle moves with him and the grace with which his body moves could all be written as poetry.

I mentally sigh and try to stifle my wayward thoughts. There is nothing worse than being turned on and not being able to climax. I curl up to Jacob’s pillow and close my eyes, enjoying the smell of him as it fills my nostrils.

I must have dozed off, because I awake when I hear a throat clearing. I look up and find Jacob standing in the bathroom doorway in nothing but a pair of dark, denim jeans with a black belt. They ride low on his hips, showcasing the sexy ‘V’ that I love to run my fingers over. He laughs when he catches me staring at it. My face blushes with embarrassment, and I look down to see his bare feet. How did I not notice before how sexy they are? Geez… even his feet can turn me on.

“You better stop looking at me like that, Sunshine. I have to run down to the station for a bit. Why don’t you get in the shower, seeing as how it takes you three years to get ready.” He walks over and slaps my butt, before digging in his dresser for a shirt.

“Fine,” I mutter while pulling the covers off me. I’m halfway to the bathroom when strong arms clamp around my waist.

“Don’t I get a kiss?” He asks while nibbling from my neck down to my shoulder. That feels really nice. So very, very nice.

I pull my willpower together long enough to give him a long, deep, wet kiss. When he ends the kiss, I head into the bathroom and slouch against the closed door. I really hope I can get over being so gun shy about having sex with Jacob. I’m like a live wire, every nerve ending is on and firing. I need his body to slake this lust. I just don’t know how much more of this I can take.

***

Brad and Sophie’s engagement party is a success. The restaurant is elegant, the food is delicious and the crowd consists of several dozen of the happy couple’s family and close friends.

As Jacob suspected, we were asked to meet at the restaurant early so that they could ask people to be in the bridal party. Of course, Jacob was asked to be a groomsman since Brad’s brother, Scott, is serving as his best man. What I didn’t see coming was Sophie asking me to be a bridesmaid. I was touched and may have gotten a tad bit emotional when accepting, but hey, I’m a girl and this is the first wedding I’ve ever had the chance to stand up in.

I’m standing with Jacob at the edge of the dance floor watching Brad and Sophie dance, when I see the exotic beauty from that night at Murphy’s making her way towards us. What the hell does she want? Her eyes light up when she is a few feet in front of us. She wraps her arm around Jacob and kisses his cheek. I’m seconds from slapping her face, when she turns to me and does the same. Um, what? Did I miss something here?

“I’m delighted to see you two are finally together! I told you that it would happen! You two look so perfect together!” She says enthusiastically looking between us. I feel like I’ve just stepped into an alternate universe where this is acceptable behavior. I’m not at all comfortable having the last woman who slept with my boyfriend, touch me.

“Thank you, Simone. Pleasure to see you again,” Jacob says before giving her a smile and leading us away.

When we get a few feet from her, I let out a little giggle and put my arms around his neck. “Did that just happen?” I ask disbelievingly.

“I think so,” he answers dryly. We both look over to see Simone watching us with a look of confusion on her face. It’s hard to hate a person who is so utterly clueless.

“Come on. Let’s go get a drink.” Jacob grabs my hand and leads me across the room to the private bar set up for tonight’s event. There are a half dozen people in line ahead of us.

“I have to go to the ladies’ room. I’ll take a white wine if I’m not back in time.” I lean up on my toes and kiss his cheek before heading down the hall to the left of the bar, where the bathrooms are.

I make short work of relieving my bladder and washing my hands. I take the opportunity to touch up my lipstick and smooth back a few flyaways from my low ponytail. I smooth down my red, cocktail dress and walk out the door.

As I near the doorway by the bar, I see a woman with her arms around Jacob’s neck. She has long, blonde hair and killer legs. Her black dress falls almost indecently high on her thighs. I watch in horror as she kisses him on the mouth. His hands are on her waist, and I feel like throwing up as I witness this heinous scene.

Jacob sets her away from him and wipes his mouth. He looks disgusted at the woman and the fist squeezing my heart loosens its hold a little. I take a step forward, attempting to hear their conversation.

“But Jake, I can give you what you want. Not that mousy thing I saw you with earlier. Let me make you feel good, baby.” Her hand trails down his chest and hooks in his belt.

“You’re crazy, Adriana. We were together one time and it was a long time ago.” He unhooks her finger from his belt.

“It was twice and you told me it was the best. Give me another chance. Let’s go find a quiet corner and I’ll show you what you’ve been missing,” she purrs seductively at him.

“You need to get a grip. I’m with Kara. I love her and there is no way I’m going to ruin that for a quick, meaningless fuck. I might have said you were the best at the time, but I’ve had better. Kara is a queen in the bedroom and she has far more class than you.”

I smile at his words. Maybe I’ve been worried for no reason. I feel special knowing he would walk away from a sure thing, even though I can’t offer that to him right now.

With a conviction that I have no idea where it came from, I walk out of the hallway and insert myself between Jacob and Adriana. I wrap my arm around his waist and rest my head on his chest. “Did I miss something?” I ask sweetly.

Adriana’s face reddens and she storms away, acting indignantly. Some people have an awful lot of nerve.

“It’s not what you think.” Jacob immediately begins defending himself.

“I know. I heard what you said. Thank you.” I grab a napkin off the nearby bar and wipe the lipstick from his mouth. “What do you say we go dance?”

“You’re too good to be true,” he whispers against my lips before leading me to the dance floor. All thoughts of Adriana leave my head when Jacob presses his body against mine and moves us with slow, sensual glides along the dance floor. It’s the same way he moves us when we’re alone in bed. Tingles radiate along my body and my nipples harden. I pull him closer and bury my head in his neck.

This is my man. I couldn’t be any happier than I am right now. The only thing that could make this better is if I can completely let go of the last of my insecurities and make love to him again.

***

Jacob

I stare out the window in our bedroom at the city skyline. My mind is lost in thoughts about that crazy bitch, Adriana, and how she could have potentially screwed things up with Kara. I didn’t tell Kara this, but that room was a who’s who of people I fucked. Thank God Adriana was the only one stupid enough to say anything.

My cock couldn’t have gotten hard with Adriana even if I wanted it to. It knows who it’s mistress is. He’s been wrapped up in the finest silk, polyester is no substitute after that.

I watch in the reflection from the window as Kara turns on her iPod and slinks her way to me. I turn around and watch in silence, while the sultry sounds of “Sure Thing,” by Miguel plays in the background. She runs her hands up my chest, under my suit coat and pushes it off my shoulders. There is something different about her right now. There is a confidence radiating from her that wasn’t there before.

She slowly unbuttons my shirt, while peppering kisses on my neck and down my chest. Her tongue stops to circle each nipple. It’s taking all my strength to remain still right now. I can tell by the determination in her face that she needs to do this. She needs to overcome her fears. So, I clench my muscles and stay still in a show of support.

Who am I kidding? I’m enjoying myself too. She’s driving me wild right now.

When my shirt is open, she lifts each hand to take out my cuff links. She kisses each palm gently before releasing them. Her hands mimic the action she did earlier and pushes my shirt off my shoulders. Next, she runs her hands over my chest, leaning in to kiss my lips. I let her lead. She keeps it soft and gentle. Her tongue barely breaches my lips. It’s the most erotic kiss I’ve ever had.

I watch in silence as she reaches out and unzips her sexy, red dress. It’s tight and lower cut, just the way I like it. The thing I like most about how she dresses though, is that she leaves a lot to the imagination. She doesn’t need to dress slutty to grab your attention. She’s classy and alluring in her own way.

Her dress falls to the floor, and she steps out of it. My mouth dries seeing that she is wearing absolutely nothing underneath it. No bra. No thong. Nothing. If I had known that earlier, I would have either made an ass out of myself or spent the night with a painful erection. As it is, my cock is straining against my zipper, wanting to be free of its confinement.

Kara drops to her knees in front of me and slowly undoes my belt and opens my dress pants. She eases them down my leg and repeats the process with my boxers. Once they’re both at my feet, I step out of them and kick them away, returning to my place in front of her.

She hesitantly reaches out and wraps her fingers around my cock. It jumps in her hand, grateful for her attention. When her mouth closes over the tip, and she sucks me into her hot, wet mouth, I have no choice but to clench my hands into fists to keep from burying them in her hair. My eyes roll into the back of my head, and I allow myself to enjoy her tongue sweeping over the head, her throat swallowing around my length and her teeth grazing lightly along my shaft.