Authors: Ana Layne
Hilary
Seeing my mom and dad is the highlight of my day. Hugging them made me never want to let them go. They both begin asking where I’ve been. Mom asks why Travis hasn’t been around. I can see Lance cringe from the corner of my eye, and I immediately change the subject. I’m not ready to have that conversation, but I know that’s the main reason I’m here right now.
“Sweetie, you got a letter here saying you withdrew from school. What is that about? Were you having trouble in your classes? You know you could have come to your father and me,” Mom says grabbing hold of my hand.
I have no clue what to do or say. The truth needs to come out and it needs to come out now. I glance over to Lance who is on the other side of me, and he nods. I take in a deep breath as I sort out the words again in my head.
“My relationship with Travis wasn’t all I expected it to be,” I began. “He, uh…he controlled my every move and it was a living hell. I couldn’t show my face around you two. I was scared you would be ashamed of me. I dropped out of school for the time being, but I will go back.”
“What do you mean controlled?” my dad asks. His voice is bitter and harsh. No father wants to hear their daughter has been mistreated.
“It’s in the past, Dad. It’s over and I’d like to leave it at that. He’s just nowhere near the man I thought he was. And there’s something else I need to tell you and Mom. I’m terrified, so…please…can you remember how much you love me?”
“Of course we love you, Hilary. You know you can tell us anything.” Maybe I’m seeing things, but Mom’s gaze roams down to my stomach like she already knows something. It’s got to be that damn mother’s intuition.
I close my eyes and reach for Lance’s hand. He squeezes it tightly, giving me the courage to finally spit out this harsh truth. I hate saying these words out loud, and hopefully this is the last time I’ll use his name in this sentence. “I-I’m pregnant with his baby.”
Mom gasps and Dad lowers his head. I’m awaiting the backlash. I’m expecting them to tell me to get the hell out of their house and never come back. Deep in the back of my mind, I know this is the reaction I’m going to receive. I refuse to let go of Lance’s hand. He’s my protection right now. My eyes are filling with tears as I sit there amidst the awkward silence.
“Shit,” Dad says, breaking the silence. He immediately eyeballs Lance. “It’s not yours?”
“No sir.” Lance speaks confidently. “I have no problem telling you that I have never touched your daughter in that way. I respect her.”
He’s being honest. We’ve only kissed.
“If you don’t mind me asking, why are you here Lance?” Dad asks.
“With all due respect, sir, I really like your daughter and I told her I will do everything possible to help take care of her and this baby.”
“Does Travis know you’re pregnant?” Mom asks quietly.
“No, Mom. And I don’t want him to know. I never want him to have a part in this baby’s life. Ever.”
“That’s a bold statement, Hilary. Make sure that’s what you really want.”
“I’m one hundred percent positive, Mom. I refuse to see him again after what he did to me.”
“If that’s your decision, then I respect it, sweetheart.” I love my Mom for how supportive she is. Of all people, I expected her to crack down harder on me, but it’s Dad who’s drilling into Lance instead.
“Taking care of a baby that isn’t yours is a big step to take, especially when you aren’t even dating my daughter,” Dad interrupts, changing the subject again. “It takes commitment and love between two people to raise a baby.”
Lance gently squeezes my hand. “I’m fully committed, Mr. Vaughan.”
“Dad, I trust Lance. It’s my fault I shoved him away the first time and he’s willing to forgive me and take on a role he shouldn’t have to. I know this must sound crazy but I hope you can respect this decision of mine. I may not like the father of this baby, and what he put me through, but I want to keep the baby.”
For the first time since this conversation started, Dad’s lips curl upward into a smile. “For what you just said, I do respect your decision. Lance, I respect your decision to step up. I just want you two to realize this won’t be easy.”
“I know it won’t,” I admit. “Frankly, I’m terrified that Travis will find out, but I can only hope I never see him again.”
“Oh, honey,” Mom whispers, grabbing my other hand. “Everything will be okay. I can help you get your appointments set up.”
“I’d love that, Mom.” Their acceptance is all I wanted, and now that I have it, I don’t care about anything else.
“Lance, will you please join us for dinner?” Dad asks. Lance nods his head, and excitement eludes me. This seems like such a dream but this is as real as it gets. If everything else goes just as well, I’ll be a happy girl.
We sit through dinner, otherwise known as cartons of Chinese food. I guess we arrived at an awkward time. That’s okay with me. I am a sucker for sesame chicken and egg rolls. Lance and Dad converse, and it’s almost like Mom and I don’t exist but that’s just fine. She’s so excited to talk about babies. We discuss everything from potential nursery themes to names.
I stifle a yawn. Lance looks over at me and winks. Oh, how he makes me swoon. My heart flutters every time he looks at me, and I love it. “If you’re tired, babe, I can head out.”
I really want to tell him I don’t want him to leave. I want to spend more time with him, but I know I need some decent sleep. Besides last night, I haven’t really gotten any, and my body is craving it. My bottom lip pushes out and I begin pouting like a kid. Waking up to him this morning was amazing. Now I can only count down the days until I can do it again. He stands and thanks my parents for dinner and I offer to walk him out to his truck. Outside, I lean against his door and he stands in front of me.
“I’m sorry. I really don’t want you to leave,” I tell him.
“It’s okay, Hil, you’re tired. I don’t blame you. It’s been a long two days and you need your rest. I promise I will see you tomorrow.”
“You mean it?”
“I mean everything when it comes to you.” He leans down to kiss me. His lips are soft and inviting. I wrap my arms around his waist, pulling him closer. The heat between my thighs is intense. He moans, deepening the kiss, and I almost have to remind myself we are outside. I’d love to rip his shirt off of him. His hands rest against my shirt. The wind blows enough to lift the edge and when his hand touches my skin, I shudder.
He breaks the kiss. “I don’t want to be disrespectful with your parents inside.”
“I know. Thank you for being here today. They took it way better than I thought they would.”
He reaches up to brush my hair behind my ear. “You’re very welcome, sweetheart. I told you everything would be just fine.”
He’s right. I think I knew he was right from the beginning, and that allowed me to fully trust him. He pulls me in for a hug, holding me tight. I wish I didn’t have to let him leave. Tomorrow can’t come fast enough.
I move out of the way so he can climb into his truck. He gives me one more kiss before starting the engine. I watch as he drives off before walking back inside my house. I talk with my parents a little longer. I know they are concerned about the role Lance is stepping into, but I am persistent that this is what I want. Their concern at least shows me they truly care. Mom even admits Lance is quite a looker.
To have their approval makes all the bad things suddenly seem better. When I finally retire to my room, it doesn’t take much for me to pass out. First, I text Lance once more and thank him again for everything he’s doing for me.
Lance
I look back in my rearview mirror as I drive away from Hilary’s house. Part of me is thrilled that her parents are as understanding as I’d hope they would be, but another part of me is selfish. The selfish part of me wishes she was sitting with me. I want to spend another night with her. That’s not too much to ask, right?
It’s not that late, and I don’t want to go home just yet. Dad is going to ask questions, and while I won’t hesitate to tell him the entire truth, I just want to postpone it a little longer. Another reason is I don’t want to end up in my room staring at the four walls so soon. No way in hell am I going to the bar. At the rate I’m going, I’m done with the bar scene. There is nothing that place holds for me anymore unless Hilary is coming with me. With a baby on the way, that won’t be for a very long time.
I keep driving until I reach Raegan and Garrett’s apartment. I look to see if any lights are on, and when the beacon of hope shines through the window, I park my truck. I knock and wait patiently for one of them to open the door for me. It takes a minute or two before Raegan opens it up. She glances at me with her eyebrow raised.
“It’s getting late, why are you here?” she asks with her hand on her hip. From the looks of her and her attitude, I blame the pregnancy hormones.
“Well, nice to see you too. Can I come in?”
“Garrett isn’t going out with you if that’s what you want.”
I throw my hands up in defeat. “I’m not going out, I just wanted to stop by, but if this is a bad time I can go.”
“Raegan, let him in,” Garrett calls from inside the house.
She sighs and steps back, giving me barely enough room to walk inside. She follows me closely to the couch hardly giving me room to breathe and sits beside me. She continues to watch me, and it’s starting to freak me out.
“Sorry to just pop up,” I tell Garrett, even though I turn to stare at Raegan. My voice turns to a slight whisper next which drives Raegan absolutely insane because I have to remember, she doesn’t know about the baby. “She talked to her parents and everything is good.”
“That’s awesome, man, I’m glad to hear that.”
Raegan fidgets in her seat. It’s driving her completely nuts, and I’m sort of reveling in her misfortune.
“What are ya’ll talking about?” she asks sweetly. I gawk at her like she wasn’t just showing two heads a moment ago. She’s suddenly back to herself. I glance at Garrett and he just shrugs his shoulders, basically telling me to go with it.
“I’m gonna tell her, man,” I decide.
“I swear I’m going to go crazy if someone doesn’t tell me what’s going on.” The annoyance in her voice is back. I’m beginning to feel sorry for Garrett, but he’s the one who knocked her up.
“Chill, woman, I’m telling you. You have to promise not to freak out, and please don’t call Hilary and make a big deal about this because hardly anyone knows.”
“Garrett knows,” she says, turning to stick her tongue out at him.
“Hilary is pregnant with Travis’s baby.”
Her eyes widen so much I think one of them may actually pop out of the socket. “She did not tell me this. I’m so sorry, Lance, I feel like I set you up for failure.” Her eyes begin to fill with tears but I put my hand up.
“No crying. He doesn’t know about the baby, okay? I got a hotel room for us last night and helped her go talk to her parents. I told her I’ll take responsibility for her and the baby even though I don’t have to.”
“You did what? Lance, are you sure?”
“You sound just like her parents.” I smirk.
“That’s just a huge responsibility. Are you sure she isn’t going to tell him he’s the father and go back to him?”
The question sits in the back of my mind. I don’t want to admit I’m afraid of that.
“She said she wants nothing more to do with him. He really did a number on her, Raegan.”
Raegan’s eyes fill with tears, and this time they don’t stop. I know she’s hormonal and I probably shouldn’t have had this conversation with her right now, but she was going to find out one day. “Where is Hilary now?”
“She’s at home. I told her I’d see her tomorrow.”
“I’m happy for you. Look, our babies can grow up together! My little Lance is growing up.”
Everyone seems to be saying I’m growing up. I’ve been grown up, I’m just maturing more.
“I think you’ve officially lost your mind, Raegan.” I laugh. She doesn’t find it too funny. In fact, she scoffs and crosses her arms over her chest. Garrett glares at me for my comment. I want to laugh because I’ll be leaving after a few, and he’ll be stuck here to deal with my aftermath. “I’m kidding, chill out. But that is what’s going on right now so if you see her, please just act normal and don’t go all baby mama.”
“What do you mean
all baby mama
?”
“Don’t start gushing about my decision to take care of her baby. Let her tell you when she’s ready.”
“Of course. Do I look crazy?”
I don’t answer her, because I don’t think she’s going to like my answer at all. I wonder if Garrett and I will be good fathers, like Howard is to Randi Lynn? Will Raegan and Hilary be good mothers?
A child’s life will be in our hands. Not too long ago, I wasn’t even sure I could take care of myself, let alone another human being. I also didn’t think I would ever change for a woman, but I’ve certainly proved myself wrong on that one.