In Your Honor (40 page)

She frowned but nodded, not wanting to
question anything when there was so much happening she didn't
understand. “I'll get my shoes on.”

A weird buzzing started in the back of her
skull and she drank a glass of water before joining him in the hall
a minute later. The group of people were watching them and
whispering.

“
Welcome to Hollywood,”
Blake muttered to her as he put on his aviators and shoved his
hands in his pockets. They entered the elevator and after the doors
closed he released a chuckle.

“
I don't understand.” Lucy
felt her body start to rise in temperature unexpectedly and the
buzzing increased in intensity.

“
The band I'm in is kind
of a big deal, Lucky.” He arched an eyebrow at her and she felt her
face turn hot. She couldn't tell if it was from embarrassment
or...

“
I know that,” she
defended, her voice not sounding like her own.

“
That's why I didn't go
into your room, people would think the exact wrong thing. And it
would be on TMZ by morning.”

“
Oh,” was all she could
think to say. She really didn't understand this side of the
industry or why the air in the elevator had gotten so
dense.

“
The media is starting to
take notice of you too, you know,” he added as they made a slow
descent. The elevator seemed to be crawling to its destination. It
was going so much slower than the ride up earlier with
Lenny.

“
That's absurd,” she
scoffed, her eyes fixed on the ugly, busy hotel carpet.

“
When you make your debut
with Shane tomorrow night, it'll be a lot harder for you to
hide.”

“
I don't know what you're
talking about.” Her throat was starting to constrict and she
blinked hard to clear her head. Where the hell was that buzzing
coming from?

“
Shane is a celebrity in
his own right, and you guys coming out as an official couple
tomorrow is going to draw a lot of attention. You really hadn't
thought about it, had you?”

She shook her head dumbly, the movement
causing her to tighten her grip on the rail against the wall that
she hadn't realized she'd been holding on to.

“
That's one of the reasons
I've always loved you, you live in the moment.” He chuckled as the
lift doors opened and he stepped out into the lobby where the rest
of their group was waiting.

But Lucy's feet refused to move. Did Blake
say he loved her? He must have meant as a friend. Right? Yeah, that
had to be it. He loved her like how she loved Chad. No, not like
Chad. She didn't want to be Blake's Chad. Did that thought even
make sense?

Her head was spinning and she blinked hard,
trying to focus. Her vision shrank to the size of a pinhole.

She took a step, then another. She heard
voices, exclamations. Someone caught her under her arms and helped
her stand back up.

“
When was the last time
you ate?” Blake's face was inches from hers and she heard his words
but couldn't form a reply.

“
Maybe we should get her
to a doctor.” Chad was speaking now. Silly Chad, always
overreacting.

Lucy worked some moisture back into her
mouth. “No, I'm okay.” A half a dozen pairs of eyes looked at her
skeptically and she tried to smile. “I think I'm just hungry.”

***

Blake's jaw was working furiously as he
debated whether or not to believe her and continue on with their
night, or force her to get checked out by a physician.

She hadn't had a panic attack since they
were kids but he could recognize the onset of one. He should have
picked up on the cues in the elevator. How he wished Shane were
here to make his job easier.

“
Okay, let's get you a
bottle of water and we'll fill you up on a bunch of red meat.
You'll be fine in no time.” She smiled gratefully and he motioned
for Chad to stand on her opposite side. He refused to let her go
and he didn't give a shit what anyone thought of that. He'd turn
her over to Brookings when he arrived, but until then, she was
under his protection.

She seemed to snap out of it during dinner
and Blake breathed a sigh of relief. He suspected that the unusual
territory and expectations had her on edge. But it was still so
unlike her. It's not like there had been a singular event or
altercation that could have caused that much anxiety. He knew she
was nervous about the awards show, but she usually embraced the
complex and exciting.

Maybe she was sick. They had been traveling
all over the country, it was possible she had picked up a bug along
the way. He reached out and laid his palm on her forehead, checking
for fever.

Everyone stopped talking and stared at
him.

“
Sorry, I was checking for
fever,” he explained, his voice clipped and tense.

“
I think it was lack of
nutrients.” Lucy smiled, her ears red. “I'm feeling better
already.”

Blake leaned back in his seat. Her brown
eyes pleaded with him to let it go. She wanted him to believe her,
that was obvious. But he couldn't let it go.

Something was wrong.

Blake slipped his phone out of his pocket
and discreetly texted Shane. It was probably none of his business,
he was probably overstepping the bounds of friendship, but he
didn't care. Lucy was all he cared about.

***

Lucy managed to make it through dinner
without another episode but it was close. She had to pretend like
Blake wasn't sitting six inches to her right with his old school
jeans pressed up against her thigh all night long and staring holes
into her. Every time she so much as glanced in his direction, green
eyes were studying her face way too closely.

He knew something was wrong. She truly hoped
he didn't ask her about it, she was a terrible liar. Besides that,
she didn't even know what was wrong, so how was she supposed to
explain it?

When Shane showed up at the restaurant she
was certain she saw some sort of nonverbal exchange between him and
Blake. But she didn't have time to analyze it because Shane whisked
her back to the hotel. Like the knight in shining armor that he
was.

Ten minutes alone with him and she was
completely relaxed and calm again. Her thoughts were back to
normal. No more jeans with the missing belt loops, no more
threadbare t-shirt that hugged tattooed biceps and connected to
worried green eyes.

She sat on the edge of the bed and took her
shoes off as he told her about his flight and the drive over to the
restaurant.

“
How are you feeling?” he
asked tenderly, changing the subject and laying a hand on her
knee.

She looked into his concerned expression and
knew someone had told on her. “Who was it? Lenny?” She tried to
force a smile.

“
It doesn't matter who
told.” He rubbed her knee with his thumb. “Are you
okay?”

Lucy sighed deeply, “Yeah, I'm okay. Mostly
embarrassed.”

“
We don't have to go
tomorrow.” He was guessing, and almost correctly, that she was
nervous about the VMAs. His confident manner eased her immediately
and she knew that as long as he was around, she would be fine. She
could focus on Shane and the rest of the world would leave her
alone. “We can stay in the hotel all day and order room
service.”

“
Lenny bought me a
freaking dress,” Lucy reminded him, thinking of the obnoxious price
tag hanging a few feet away.

“
So? I'll reimburse her.”
He touched her chin. “It doesn't matter. All that matters to me is
you.”

She smiled at him, unsure how to answer. She
knew he meant it, he was crazy about her. She had no doubts.

“
I want to go,” she said
simply. How was she supposed to tell him that it wasn't the awards
show, it was only her own inner misgivings about her feelings that
was making her crazy? She'd never doubted her heart before and now
she was doing everything in her power to suffocate it. “I'll need
your help with the walking,” she continued as she leaned into his
side, hoping to soak up some his strength.

“
I'll use any excuse to
hold onto you.” He wrapped an arm around her and she closed her
eyes. “But you let me know the moment you want to leave and we're
out of there. Okay?”

“
Okay.”

***

The VMAs were all the insanity they looked
like on TV. Cameras, celebrities, screaming fans, all of it.

The dress, shoes and hair transformed Lucy
into something resembling a starlet and she was confident she at
least fit in. Lenny's stylist had done wonders with Lucy's wild
hair. He twisted and curled and pinned it all into a swooping up-do
that looked sophisticated, but still let Lucy feel like herself by
letting a few curls go free. The makeup was a whole new experience.
She got to have her face done by a professional and the false
eyelashes were her favorite part. Who knew she liked getting
fancied up?

She would have been overwhelmed if it
weren't for the solid and sturdy presence of Shane at her side.
Clad in Armani, he had been true to his word and had kept his arm
firmly locked around her all night. She didn't stumble or get
nervous once. He was her rock. Her very well-dressed and super hot
rock.

Lenny and Luke lit up the red carpet. Lenny
wore a short black dress and dripped with elegance while Luke wore
a black suit and silver tie. He looked more like a movie star than
a rock legend. Cameras flashed and people called to Luke to come
over and say a few words to different labels of media. He was the
definition of classy, and Lucy was proud to be associated with him
and his band.

The rest of DBS wore similar suits to Luke's
but Blake was the biggest shock for her. She'd never seen him in
anything but jeans. His face was shaved smooth and he'd combed his
hair back properly. The dark suit and crisp white shirt made him
look respectable, and she knew she stared a little longer than she
should have when they all met in the hotel lobby to wait for the
limos. But she was pretty sure that he had taken his time looking
at her too. And shouldn't they notice these things about each
other? They'd been friends for too long to pretend that this was a
normal experience. He had given her a slight nod before getting in
the second limo while Shane directed her to the first one.

Luke hadn't been exaggerating when he said
that certain artists would make fools of themselves. Some of the
disasters were simply clothing-related while some individuals had
to be removed by security. And everyone seemed to be drinking
heavily.

The highlight of the night was the DBS
performance. With the guys' smart suits looking classy as hell,
they played one of their iconic hits and it struck Lucy for the
first time how famous Blake had really become. He'd taken his
talent and had really turned it into something to be proud of. This
is how it should have worked out. It was good that he had left all
those years ago, she would only have held him back. And he was
amazing. He needed to be allowed to shine.

The presenters that night included Ashton
James, the infamous ex of Luke Casey. Coincidentally, her seat was
very near Lucy's and she had a hard time not staring at the
ravishing brunette. She'd heard all about the trouble Ashton had
caused on last year's tour and was having a hard time believing
someone so beautiful could be that bitchy.

Before the show started to wrap up, their
group decided to head over to one of the wrap parties. They
wouldn't be able to party too late since they had to get back on
the road first thing in the morning.

“
You sure you're okay with
this?” Shane had one arm locked around her waist as he spoke loudly
in her ear. She grinned at him in reply, her voice would have been
lost in the loud music anyway. Her anxiety from the previous
twenty-four hours had been completely chased away by Shane's
powerful presence.

They proceeded to dance and mingle all
night. Shane seemed to know everyone in the room and introduced her
to more celebrities than she could count. She was starting to
understand what Blake had said about people taking notice of her.
More people knew who she was than she thought possible.

Out of the corner of her eye she saw Blake
chatting up a long-legged girl in a very short dress. She was
surprised at the surge of jealousy that went through her and she
shook her head, trying to clear it.

“
You all right?” Shane
asked her, concern coloring his features.

“
Yeah, I'm gonna use the
restroom.” She smiled and patted his arm reassuringly before making
a beeline for the ladies' room.

When she was finished with the facilities
and stepped back into the pulsing party, she had a very clear shot
of Blake and his female companion.

Ashton James.

Lucy's false sense of security dissolved and
her limbs went stiff with shock. She took a deep breath and then
another. The lead butterflies tried to make a comeback, but they
were frozen in the pit of her stomach as she fought to come to
terms with what she was seeing.

Blake's mouth was whispering something into
Ashton's ear that was making her laugh. Her long, manicured nails
stroked his tie seductively and she leaned her body against
his.

Suddenly, all Lucy wanted was to be home.
Safe in her hometown, her regular life back. Oblivious to Blake's
life as a rock star. Because this... it was too much. She knew that
in the years that Blake had been on the road to fame, things like
this happened all the time. He'd been linked to more than a handful
of beautiful starlets, but Lucy had been able to keep that in a
portion of her mind reserved for nightmares and things she refused
to think about willingly.