And I had. My master was both kind and cruel. A lethal combination for the girl looking for a hero and the woman I’d been forced to become.
Chapter 1
Zain
“Did you think I’d let you get away with what you’ve done? All those girls, dead, broken.”
The smell of sweat, sex, and expensive liquor assaulted my senses, making the hate I had for my uncle come to a boiling point in my veins. My fist tightened in his hair and I pushed the tip of the angled blade deeper into the top of his neck. He was silent, but I didn’t expect him to beg for his life. He had too much pride for that. Instead, a grunt followed as he turned his body to try to break my hold.
“Your father will know it was you. You won’t get away with this. He’ll kill you like he did your whore mother.”
Blood soaked into the collar of his robe and I pushed in deeper. He spoke Arabic. I refused to in the moment. English had always been my primary and although I could speak four different languages, I stuck to what spoke of home. Of America. A land that had been stolen from me at the tender age of eight. Stolen, kidnapped to live with my real father. Not the one my mother had married and tried to pass off as my dad. Maybe I’d always known Jeff wasn’t my blood, but I loved him as if he had been. Their deaths had broken my childhood. Turned me from an innocent little boy into an angry kid who longed for revenge. My rebirth landed me in years of beatings and training. I took everything, embraced the evil man I’d been made into, letting the horrors I saw become ammunition for the day I could put an end to it all.
Amir saw me as his successor and I allowed it.
“My mother was smart to hide from that bastard. If you think I’m going to let him get away with what he did, what he’s
done
, you’re stupider than I thought. Taking me and turning me in to his own personal killer was the biggest mistake he ever made.”
“Wrong.” Another sound came from his mouth as he tried to pull his head further away from my knife. “He wanted what was best for you. You’re blood, Zain. You’re an Amari. You can’t escape that.”
“Watch me.” His blood poured over my hand as I drove the blade home and let his lifeless body fall to the floor, not far from the slave he’d raped and beaten to death. Shuffling outside his room didn’t give me time to contemplate what I should do. The flight back to the US would allow me to process my next move. Right now, I had to get back to San Francisco. Back to Lily and the life I’d created outside of the one I was trying to cut ties with. If…I ever could. Even if I killed my other two uncles and my father, there were still people who knew who I was. I might never be safe. Not without some sort of inside help.
Knocking on the door had my head snapping in that direction. I eased through the window, onto the roof, being sure to keep my steps light. The security was lacking and I knew I could take care of myself when it came to any of his four guards, but I didn’t want to waste the time on having to.
More knocking faded into the background as I kept low and eased from the roof. The mile run back to my car didn’t take long when all I had was my slave in my thoughts. Lily consumed me, made me ache to be by her side. It was almost impossible to focus on driving when all I could see were flashes of her eyes. Of her lips. I missed her more than I could even begin to describe and I was here for her. For the promise I’d made so long ago. Had I been able to, I would have taken care of my past months prior. Years, even. But death didn’t sit well with my family and the first caused more problems than I could handle on my own. Now that my time had come, I was left with little choice. Safety was key, and I was trying like hell to make it back alive.
Ringing filled the interior just as I pulled into the parking area of the airport. My mouth twisted as I looked down at my phone. I was so close. My father’s name on the Caller ID had me reaching for it. It was crucial that I answered, regardless of whether I wanted to.
“Hello, Father.” I kept my tone bored, neutral like I always did concerning Amir.
“You haven’t left yet.”
I took in the clunker I was sitting in. I knew the car wasn’t being tracked. “Not yet. I’m waiting for my plane now. Why, what’s going on?”
“Tel called. Your uncle is dead.”
“Dead? How?”
Silence. I cringed at not asking which uncle. Had he caught that?
“They’re going to get back to me.” He let out a deep breath. “First your uncle Samir, now…this. I don’t like it. After you finish the finalization of the next shipment, you’re coming home. That’s an order.” I wanted so badly to ask if Adul or Saul would be there when I returned. Adul was a given, but Saul wasn’t. He came and went as he pleased. I’d half expected to see him when I’d arrived at my father’s to go over the details of the new shipment, but he evaded me. Knew, whether or I gave any indication or not, that I wanted him dead. Had Adul not been at my father’s side the entire time, I would have killed him today, too.
I let his last words filter back through.
You’re coming home. That’s an order
. Home. Because he knew I could figure this mystery out, or so he could kill me himself?
“Absolutely. It shouldn’t take long. Maybe a week. Two, tops.”
“A week. Make it happen.”
The line disconnected and I closed my eyes. If I were smart, I’d go back now and finish them all off. But it wasn’t that easy. My father’s house was locked down tighter than Fort Knox. Even if I did make it in, Saul wasn’t there. I’d only get to kill my father and Adul. Plus, I’d never make it out alive. And I had to if I ever wanted to get back the only thing that had ever been mine. Lily.
God, I was so fucking close. All I needed was the right moment to slip in and she’d be mine again. Then I could finish my father and uncles off for good. We’d be safe, set in the new life I had planned for us. It had to work. The guards that protected her were getting too comfortable. Last month it dropped from three to two. At her insistence, so said her brother, Slade. Although he didn’t know I overheard that piece of information.
A smile pulled at my lips as I grabbed my bag from the back seat and walked toward the entrance of the airport at a fast pace.
Slade. He had no idea who I was. Not really. To him, I was some guy he’d met at one of his fancy parties. Someone whose face he’d recognize and maybe make small talk with, but not one he’d invite over for dinner. At least, not yet. I made sure to pop back into his life at random moments. Let him know enough about me to sate his curiosity and gain his trust. To him, I was Zane Collins, unlike the Zain Cook I had been born into. Unlike the Zain Amari my Arabic family knew me as. Slade was my only link to Lily. The key would be getting past all the blockades he set in my path.
I’d spent the first year hating him, wanting nothing more than to spill his blood and that of his men for taking my gift away from me. Then reality sunk in and I let the facts play out. The world I lived in was different than everyone else’s. Concerning the sex trafficking, I was a criminal by association. My knowledge damned me, regardless of whether I was a part of it. I hated it with a passion. My dealings consisted of money transactions and being the muscle when things went wrong. Until last month, when I needed an excuse to continue to stay in the states. Now, it was up to me to handle the next shipment of girls, and little did my father know, there wouldn’t be any. Not anymore.
Voices echoed throughout the airport from so many people. I kept my head down as I made my way to the gate. I boarded without incident and the flight was uneventful. I had a first class row to myself, but I didn’t let myself relax until I was arriving in San Francisco. The cool air had me taking in a deep breath. Even though I was only gone a short amount of time, I missed the place I now considered home. Three years of worming my way into Lily and Slade’s life and I’d embraced San Francisco. But it was almost time to say goodbye.
The long term parking sign hung ahead. As I approached, I slowed, glancing at my BMW in the exact same spot I left it in. Although I kept a steady pace, I observed everything. A woman in an older SUV was pulling out of a space at the end. A man was waiting for the elevator on the far side of the garage. I grabbed my keys, unlocking the car. The lights flashed and I hit the button for the trunk, throwing my bag in at my approach. The feel of being watched was real. I knew it. Lived it. Had been on the other side. Someone definitely had their eye on me. Question was, who?
Again, I scanned the area, searching for some sign that would trigger me. Nothing. “Son of a bitch.” I climbed in, starting the car and heading out of the garage, watching the rear view mirror almost the entire time. Everything seemed as normal as it could be. Maybe I was overreacting. My slip up with my father could have been playing a role, but I wasn’t sure.
The sun was beginning to rise and I contemplated whether I should go forward with my routine. I couldn’t have timed my arrival any more perfectly. I’d have just enough time to stop by my place, shower, change, and pick up some coffee before I headed to Lily’s building. She’d be at the office early. She was always the first one there and the last to leave. Knowing her personality like I did, I wouldn’t expect anything less. But should I?
My hands tightened around the steering wheel as I surveyed behind me one last time — nothing. I let thoughts of her overwhelm me. It took a good year after the trial for her to emerge, but she’d done it so bravely. Just like she’d stayed strong before and after she was taken from my arms. Facing her rapists without me, when I promised her I’d kill them myself…it destroyed me. The murder, the trial, the mental facility, all the appointments and treatments she’d gone to afterward…I had so much fixing to do within my poor Lily. But would she let me? From what I’d seen, glimpsing her from afar, she’d all but forgotten about what we shared. Forgotten
me
.
Fuck, I couldn’t think about it. If I did, I’d say to hell with my plan and take her now. Kill anyone who got in my way. That was dangerous, not only for her, but me. So why was I fingering the button to the console where my gun was hidden?
Time. It was driving me crazy. Years, I’d waited. I couldn’t do it anymore. My slave had shown me a world I never thought existed. Shown me what love could do to a man who’d all but cursed the emotion. Now I was desperate to get both back. What would she do if she saw me? Got the briefest glimpse? Would she come looking for me or would it scare her off? Would the security get tighter and ruin any chance I had of taking her?
I sighed as I battled with traffic. So many scenarios, yet none of them were putting me at ease. I just wanted her back in my arms. To run my fingers down the side of her face until I reached her throat, letting her pulse reassure me that what we shared was real. But who was I kidding? My gift would run. Fight me just as hard as she ever had. Probably even harder.
I was going to have to put her back in her place and convince her that what we shared was right and meant to be. We’d be able to connect all over again. Just the way it was before, but away from the rest of the trouble that had surrounded us.
My heart raced as I turned onto our road.
Our
road, because I made sure to get a place not far from hers. Diagonally across the street and directly above her floor so I could see through her glass windows perfectly, to be precise. Penthouse for penthouse. It had worked out better than I could have dreamed. But it came with a price. Her sadness turned mine into fury. The tears she shed while she looked off into the distance were equivalent to razorblades over my skin. She needed me, and fuck if I didn’t need her, too. Soon, I’d stop all the pain and replace it with the kind I knew she enjoyed. Lily would be crying, but only for release.
Chapter 2
Lily
If there was one thing I’d learned on my journey, it was to shut myself off. The numbness left me cold. Distant from everyone around me. It worked with the position I held at Slade Industries. People were scared of me, and for the first time, it wasn’t because of who my brother was. They truly feared the killer that walked their halls. Their silence may have prevented the truth from being said, but panic couldn’t stay hidden from the depths of their eyes when they had to face me —especially alone. Both men and women fled when I appeared. When they were called into my office, they cowered. That sort of power corrupted the weak, made them hungry for more. With me, it left me feeling dirtier than I already was. But I didn’t balk from my job and I didn’t show weakness. I couldn’t afford to if I was going to stay in control of this new stranger lurking inside my body.
Who was I?
“Ms. Roberts, you have more flowers. Would you like me to bring them into your office?”
My eyes flickered to the clock on the wall. Eleven thirty-two. They always appeared around the same time. Who they were from, I had no idea.
I hit the button on the phone to answer. “Bring them in.”
On instinct, my stare went back my inbox. Still, no news from Slade on whether he wanted me to go after Kingston Corp. Not having anything to do left me jittery. Boredom brought dangerous thoughts. Ones I couldn’t let linger for too long.
The door opened and I glanced up, expecting more white roses in a light pink vase. The red petals had my eyes flashing wide and me easing to stand.
“What is this?”
Patrice shrugged, a smile coming to her face. “I was surprised, too. Seems your secret admirer wanted to change things up. Three weeks, Monday through Friday, and only now he decides to send flowers with some color to them. About time.”
I frowned, walking over. “There’s a card.” The surprise was etched deep in my words and I regretted it almost instantly. I didn’t want to sound like I was intrigued by the daily ritual. I’d always pretended to be annoyed by their presence. Somehow, I’d come to depend on them, even if the gesture was something as simple as flowers. Their arrival was becoming my one bit of happiness for the day. Stability of the comforting kind.
“Look at that. You’re right.” Her hand reached forward before she seemed to catch herself. “I’m sorry, Ms. Roberts, I’ll leave you.”
I nodded, already walking closer to the large bouquet of roses mixed with lilies. The card was perched at the top in a plastic stand and for the life of me, I couldn’t reach forward with Patrice still in the room. As the door closed behind her, my fingers moved. Would it say who it was from? Would it be empty? Or would a signature be present so I could finally discover who this mystery person was?
The door eased shut only to swing back open. The space was almost completely filled with my brother’s towering frame as he barged through. My hand drew into a fist and I stepped away from the flowers.
“Slade. I was just waiting for your email. I didn’t know you were back in San Francisco. What has it been, over a year?”
The dark suit clung to his wide shoulders as his eyes cut over to mine, but he continued toward the desk.
“Couldn’t be helped. Mary needed off the yacht.”
“Off?” My arms crossed over my chest. The suit jacket I wore hugged to my back and I shifted at the exposure to my wrists. Even now, I couldn’t take my scars showing in public. Behind closed doors, the crescents and claw marks didn’t bother me in the least, but they were mine to see, no one else. They told my story. My gruesome life of witnessing the horrors of beaten and broken slaves. Ones who died in my arms and others who suffered from fractured bones and internal injuries. I was there for them through the worst. The only one who was there for them. Of course, I couldn’t have been if it weren’t for the permission of my Master.
I sighed as Slade pulled out the chair and began messing with the computer.
“Mary’s pregnant. She can’t take the motion anymore. She’s sick and I can’t stand it. I feel so damn helpless.”
“Pregnant?” The excitement sounded so alien that I wasn’t even aware it was me who had spoken the word. Confusion had my brow drawing in before I could stop it.
“That’s right. Eight weeks.” His gray eyes rose to mine. “What do you think about being an aunt?”
I could see my brother’s smile wanting to surface and it pulled mine out, until I could feel my teeth become exposed. “I couldn’t be happier. Congratulations.” Slade stood as I rushed over, throwing my arms around him. I couldn’t remember the last time I had any sort of contact with another person. My skin prickled and I tried not to flinch at the discomfort. How had we drifted so far apart? Slade practically raised me. Sure, we weren’t super close as we grew older, but I couldn’t remember being this withdrawn.
“Is Mary excited?” I pulled back, distancing myself.
“Elated,” he breathed out, sitting back down. “We weren’t trying, but we weren’t opposed to it either. Months went by and it just…happened. Amazing, really. I’ve never been able to picture myself as a father.” He smiled, again. “I think I like it.”
“You’re going to be great. You’ll see, it’ll come natural.”
Typing sounds filled the air and he paused to look up. “Listen to you. You sound so grown up. Full of wisdom. What do you know about babies?”
My smile melted. “Nothing. I just…” What I knew, he’d never know. There was no way I could tell him that one of the slaves who’d been there long before me went through a birth not weeks before I had been physically removed. How she thought she’d hate the baby because of who it was from, but loved it at first sight. Or how I almost…
“It’s just what I hear. Your fatherly instincts will kick in and things will play out just as they’re supposed to.”
“Didn’t work out for ours so much.” His eyebrow cocked and I rolled my eyes.
“He’s the exception. You’re nothing like our father.”
More typing. “No, I’m not. I’ll love my children. They’ll always be protected.”
“I believe that.” And I did. Slade was as ruthless as he was possessive. But he cherished what was his. Mary was loved by him more than I could put into words. It made me miss that feeling. I once felt protected. Cared for.
“Shit,” Slade said, under his breath. “Where in the hell did I put those documents?”
My head shook as I neared. “Probably in
your
computer. My folders are set up differently than yours and it’s not like we share the same ones, anyway.”
“My computer?” Slade looked around, as if seeing the room he was in for the first time. “This is my
old
office.”
“Yes,” I breathed out. “I took it over last year before you left. You,” I said, pointing toward the door, “are three rooms over, corner office. You said you liked the view better, remember?”
He stood. “I’m sorry, Lily. I’m not in my right mind today. Things have been…crazy lately.”
“You never even came back after you passed over the reins here. I’m the one in complete control. What is it you’re looking for? Maybe I can help.”
A twitch in his cheek flashed only a second before he rounded the desk. My heart exploded as I followed him to the roses.
“You have a boyfriend?” The glance he threw me had me nearly stumbling. I knew the rules. Or, the
rule
. Slade made me promise when he left me his penthouse and set me up with a job that I’d inform him when I decided to date. I knew he wanted to run a full check. Make sure I wasn’t dating a psycho or some deadbeat.
“I’m not seeing anyone. I don’t even know who those are from.”
The look he threw me was full of uncertainty. “Let’s see, then.” He grabbed the card, inspecting the envelope before he handed it over. “Open it. Let’s see who has an interest in my little sister.”
There was a playfulness there, but I knew better than to buy into the act he was projecting. In his eyes, my abduction and everything that had come along with it was his fault. He was still trying to make up for the damage he believed he caused by his absence—the penthouse, the job, a bank account with a small fortune in it. I knew he believed I wouldn’t have been taken if he had been keeping a better eye on me, but that’s where our opinions differed. We were both stubborn. I would have helped the girl who I now knew as Mary’s sister, Bethany, regardless. Being sold into sex slavery was no one’s fault but mine and the ones responsible for my abduction. All of them were dead, but two. Bethany and her husband. As for the ones who bought me, I knew I was powerless to put an end to their lives. I wasn’t even sure where to begin looking, aside from the country itself.
“Go on,” he said, leaning forward.
“I’m going, jeez.” My hand shook as I broke the seal. Anxiety surged and I wasn’t sure why I was so nervous. It’s not like I knew the person. I never went out anywhere. Not even shopping for groceries. They were delivered like everything else I wanted or needed.
I pressed my lips together as I pulled out the small card. The one word had me crumbling it in my hand before my brother could see.
“Well?” Slade’s head cocked to the side. “What did it say?”
“Nothing.” I forced a smile and stepped back, clenching my fist even tighter. At his step forward, I could so easily see the brother in front of me and not the boss. He’d try to get that card any way he could and I had every intention of trying my best not to let that happen.
“Lily, let me see it.”
My head shook and I felt the pins holding my hair up, loosen. “No. It’s gibberish, really.”
“Lily.” The way his tone deepened, I knew this was my last chance before he’d physically remove it from my hand. Fuck, I hated how overbearing he was at times. But I couldn’t deny how much he’d helped me. Hell, continued to help. I was safe because of my brother. Back here…because of him. Would he understand what the card said?
No. Even as I watched him take another step, I knew my guilt was making me overreact. Besides, maybe
I
was misunderstanding the meaning.
“Fine. Here.” The small ball of paper that sat in my palm was picked up and unfolded. As I watched my brother concentrate, I knew he was trying like hell to decipher the same message I had.
Red.
It could be the color of the flowers. Passion.
The code word for when I wanted the pain to cease.
No. That was ridiculous. Zain was history. He didn’t exist anymore. What we had died in Afghanistan and all the memories I carried over were forbidden to resurface here. He was the enemy. He’d brainwashed me into thinking I loved him. And I had allowed it.
“You want to explain?” Slade asked the question, but his attention was focused on the card.
“Color of the flowers? It would make sense. They’re usually white.”
That got his attention. His head snapped up. “Usually? I wasn’t told you were getting flowers.”
I shrugged, trying to brush it off. “Maybe they’re from Brace. Maybe that’s why he neglected to mention it.”
He tilted his head, even angrier, and I forced a laugh to cover my unease.
“Calm, Slade, they’re not from your guard. He probably doesn’t even know they’re for me, if he’s seen them delivered at all. Your men stay downstairs now, at my request. The flowers could have been for anyone on this floor. Besides, they’ve been coming every work day for three weeks or so. They’re not a big deal. Today was the first day they were red or held any sort of card. They’re harmless, I’m sure.”
“They’re flowers. They arrive
every
work day. They are not harmless.”
I rolled my eyes. “Let’s drop it. Tell me more about Mary. Where is she? Is she at the penthouse?”
“Hotel. And we’re not just going to push this to the side, Lilian.” He tossed the card to the shelf the flowers were sitting on and pulled out his phone. “The insignia is from a shop not two blocks away. I want to know who sent these.” At his back turning to me and the phone rising to his ear, I made my way back to the desk. Still, I couldn’t stop the shaking.
“Marcio, I need some information. Lily has been getting flowers for the last few weeks. They’re coming from Betty’s Flowers. Figure out who they’re from. I want an address of where this person lives and a telephone number.” He hung up, but I didn’t miss the anger behind his stare before he softened. Slade might try to hide who he really was, but I’d seen that look before. I knew what he was capable of.
The chair squeaked as I sat down. “So, what do you plan to do once you find out who my secret admirer is? Gouge his eyes out for being interested in me? Remove his brain so he can never think of me again?”
My patience was gone. Something about my brother mixing in anything possibly having to do with Zain left me in a weird place. I knew my guess was probably way off. I doubted my Master even remembered my name, but I couldn’t help but get defensive on his behalf. And that only had my temper spiking even more. I shouldn’t try to protect the worst kind of criminal known to man.
“Removing his brain or eyes because he has an interest in you is a little extreme. Even for me. What I will do is make it a point to meet this man and see what his intentions are. Why hasn’t he contacted you? You said it’s been three weeks. That’s plenty of time.”