Mary’s fingers pressed over her lips. “Nine girls. Between four men?”
“I thought Zain had four uncles and then there was the father?” Slade asked.
“That’s right,” I agreed. “But one didn’t live there for long, and the other...well, he did, but Saul moved out. It’s a long, complicated story.”
The two of them got quiet, only for Slade to shift his feet. “Maybe someday you can tell me everything that happened. When you’re ready. I’ve never asked, but I’d really like to know.” I could tell he was holding something back.
“Maybe someday.” Even as I said it, I’d already taken a step back.
“Lilian, I’m sorry, but I can’t help but ask. With all this talk of babies and knowing that things were far from great there…”
Another step back.
“Obviously you didn’t get pregnant or at least.” He paused. “I mean, did you? Or I guess what I’m trying to ask is—”
“Slade,” Mary hissed, “you can’t ask her that.”
“Well, if she was pregnant and one of the fuckers did something, I have a right to know. She just seems to know too much.” He turned back to me. “Did they hurt you? Were you ever pregnant?”
The door clicking closed had my eyes jerking to the doorway. I couldn’t contain my panic and it only grew as Zain walked forward with a surprised, yet hurt, expression on his face.
“You told them without me?”
My head shook and I wasn’t sure what he’d heard, but my Master’s presence and acknowledgement left my walls crumbling. It left the memories raw, real, as if I faced my loss all over again.
“So, it’s true? Who?” Slade roared. “Start talking. This should have been something I knew when you returned. Lilian, I could have helped you. Or…Jesus.”
My lips wouldn’t move. All I could do was hug myself tighter to fight the emptiness I felt every time I remembered. Sorrow overtook me as I watched a tear fall to the floor. Frustration mixed with sadness as he spun toward Zain. “You got her pregnant? Yes?”
I looked up to see Zain press his lips together, his face turning hard as he came to my side. Instead of answering Slade immediately, he angled my face up and cupped my cheek. The strength I clung to within myself flickered and pain overtook the cold stature I wore like a life vest. More tears escaped while he lowered and placed his forehead against mine. “I’m here now. Shh. No more crying. Hold me.”
As he spoke the words, I was already wrapping my arms around him. The barrier I’d made over my heart for protection against anymore hurt was gone, replaced with a wall of power I trusted more than my own. Zain pulled me directly in front of him and I let my chest merge with his. He wanted to protect me and I was upset enough to let him.
“That’s right. I got Lily pregnant. It wasn’t planned, but it happened. We were…happy when we found out.”
“Continue.”
Slade lost some of his anger as Mary’s voice broke through. “You have no right,” she said, quietly. “I know you’re protective of your sister, but you’re crossing the line. Can you not see it hurts her to relive this pain? Let it go. If she wants to tell you when she’s ready, allow her that. She has Zain to protect her now. Look at them. Look at him. He’s doing that.”
“I want to know who was responsible.” His tone was demanding, but a gentleness laced his words. “I have to know. Please. I feel like I don’t even know you anymore. You’re my sister, Lily. Your pain is mine. Just tell me what happened.”
Zain’s arms tightened and I turned to face Slade.
“I can’t.” I barely got the words out. That night had been the worst of all I could remember. The words that were spoken. The evil I’d seen come from behind his uncle’s eyes as his rage was unleashed on me and my unborn child was something I was sure I’d never recover from. Even now, I was trembling so badly I could barely stand.
“My uncle, Saul. Lily was almost ten weeks when…” He paused. “I didn’t think Lilian was going to make it. She was unconscious and barely breathing when I found her. I wasn’t there when it happened or else he’d be dead right now. He was smart enough to be gone when I got home and stayed away until recently. Now he’s back under my father’s roof and I have every intention of making him pay for what he did. You don’t have to worry about that. I don’t forgive and I sure as hell don’t forget. He’ll pay with his life, you have my word.”
Slade’s head lowered to stare at the floor. His face was like stone, his frame stiff with anger. When his eyes rose to mine, the mask he wore so well slid into place.
“I’m sorry about your loss. Even more sorry that I couldn’t comfort my sister when she needed it the most. That ends today. No more distance, Lilian. No more pulling away. We’re a family and from here on out, we stick together.” He turned his attention to Zain. “That goes for you, too. You’re one of us now. Anything you need.
Anything
. All you have to do is ask. Family?” His hand extended and Zain walked us forward as he reached over and shook it.
“Brothers.”
Chapter 26
Zain
The flight was mostly silent. Lily and I were both lost in our thoughts and the only comfort I got from the memories was the fact that she was curled into my side. As the scenes played out, I barely recalled how the mountains turned to hills and then became mountains again. The large estate brought me back to reality as we lowered to the helipad. Even the exit from the helicopter seemed surreal. It was as if I was still stuck in some dream state. The last few weeks had been more than what most people could take, and although I liked to think of myself as a strong person, the events had taken their toll. All I longed for was the one who I held close to my side as we entered the large mansion. Statues and large paintings decorated the space. My fingers pushed into her bicep as I led her past the entrance to greet the staff lined up before us.
“Ms. Roberts, it’s good to see you again. Mr. Collins, it’s a pleasure to meet you. I’m Harold and I’m in charge of the staff. This is Mrs. Evans. She’s the main housekeeper.” He gestured to a short, older woman with gray hair. She reminded me of a grandmother, if I had ever had one. I liked her instantly. Her eyes sparkled as she smiled.
No one seemed to bat an eyelash at the fact that my slave’s face was immensely bruised. It was odd, but I pushed it away as Harold went over meal times and excused the rest of the staff.
“Ms. Robert’s last visit was to the East Wing, so we have everything already made up. There’s a tray of refreshments waiting.”
“Thank you, Harold. We’ll be heading there now. I feel like I could use a nap before dinner.”
Lily yawned as I led her up the grand staircase and I couldn’t help but worry as we made it to the top. A door stood a good twenty feet ahead and two halls broke off to the left and right. As she turned us left, I weaved my fingers through her hair just above her ear and drew her head to rest on the side of my chest.
“Straight ahead?” I really didn’t need to ask where her room was. My guess was it was bigger than the rest. That meant at the end.
“Yes,” she said, quietly. “But I’ve only ever been here once, a few years back.”
I turned the door knob and pushed open the barrier. An off-white comforter covered a massive bed centered in the middle of the room. There was a setup to the right with a black loveseat, facing a fireplace. My head shook while I tried to take it all in. The penthouse was one thing. The luxury I’d seen her in had grown on me. But this? My head tilted back to look at the large crystal chandelier above. When I brought my gaze down, I spotted French doors that led to a balcony.
“Your brother…”
“Is Slade,” she finished. “He has quite the taste.” Lilian broke from me, shrugged off the black, knee-length trench coat, and tossed it on the foot of the bed. When she turned to face me, my heart began to race. There was so much emotion playing on her face. I was smart to worry. Tears shown in her eyes and her lip quivered. For the first time, we were alone, safe, and not having to hide who we were. The impact was like a fist to my gut.
Lily rushed forward, collapsing to her knees at my feet. She hugged tightly around my legs, sobbing as if she were a child. She’d been so strong and I had known it would only be a matter of time before this happened. The girl who left me over three years ago had overcome odds few people in their right mind would have been able to handle. After three years of putting on a mask, it was falling, breaking, right at my very feet.
“Oh, slave.” My fingers gripped her hair, holding her to me while she squeezed even harder. It was as if she was scared I’d disappear without the connection. Truth be told, I was almost weary myself. This seemed too good to be true.
“I was so afraid I’d lost you,” she rushed out. “All that time with Jonathon, I didn’t want to believe it, but I feared you were dead. Now this,” she sobbed even harder. “Is this really happening?” Tears rolled down her cheeks as she looked up. “I can be with you? For good?”
“Forever,” I said, sternly.
I wanted her to know I wasn’t going anywhere. That she never had to worry about losing me again. But I still had to go back to Afghanistan. That thought had me reaching down for her and pulling her small frame into me. I couldn’t think about that now. If I contemplated what might happen, I’d never be able to leave her, and I had to. Had to make my uncles pay for their crimes.
“I want you to look past these last few weeks and I want your head clear. I’ll be asking you this question throughout the course of our stay.” My hand stroked her face as I made her look at me. Before I spoke, I wiped away the tears. “I’ve told you once, and I’ll say it again, with me, it’s forever or never. You have my heart, Lilian. I want no one but you. Do you feel the same, as of right now?”
“Well…yes.” She looked confused. “Of course I do. Right now? I don’t like how you say that.”
My tongue traced my lips while I tried to gather my thoughts in a way she’d grasp. “You love what you know of me. What we shared. But things are going to be different this time, slave. I’m still your Master, but you may not like what comes with that, here, in the real world. We had four months together before you were taken. The first couple of weeks, I took it easy on you, letting you adjust to your new life. Then, you were pregnant. You never experienced who I truly am.”
Lilian’s eyebrows drew in while she watched me speak. I could imagine how fast her mind was turning over my words.
“You’re on birth control, correct?” I knew she was, but I wanted to hear her say it.
“The shot.”
I nodded. “You’ll stay on it for quite some time. A couple of years, at least. I want you strong and healthy when we decide to have another child. And we will, Lilian. At least two.”
“Children.” It wasn’t a question, but something she appeared to have to say. As if testing the word out loud.
“That’s right. You do want children, don’t you?”
Her head shook. “I don’t know. I haven’t really thought about it. I suppose…someday.”
“Good. It’s nothing we need to go into now. As long as I know you’re open to it, that’s all that matters.”
My fingers trailed up the back of her dress until I came to the top where the zipper rested. As I worked it down, Lily shivered and her breathing deepened.
“Until then, your body will belong to me. Completely. You have to grasp the definition of what I’m saying. When I want you, you will present yourself to me. Anytime. Anywhere. It doesn’t matter the location, slave. This,” I said, pushing her dress over her shoulders and letting it fall to the floor, “belongs to me. Your body is no longer yours.”
Her mouth opened, only to close. The black stockings were paired with black and white patterned, lace panties, with a matching bra. Her curves had my cock hardening instantly.
“You will take care of it. Treasure every inch of yourself with the upmost value. Why? Because you serve me. Seeing you flourish, makes me happy. Tasting you,” I said, nipping at her neck, “is what I crave.” My hands grasped both sides of her ribs and I raked my nails down to her hips with just enough pressure to make her gasp. “And fucking you is my pleasure,” I stressed. “That is the true way of a Master and slave. I will protect you, love you, honor and cherish who you are. But if you want me to be your Master, you will obey my rules. Every single one. Can you do that, Lilian?”
I pulled back enough to take in her expression. There was one hell of an internal battle happening inside her head. It showed by the way she bit her lip as her eyes scanned the surroundings off to our side. She’d been in control for so long. Could she just let it go all of a sudden? It wasn’t part of the new person she’d become.
“Work?”
Her high pitched tone dropped at the end and I couldn’t stop my lips from setting.
“Definitely at work. Not noticeably so. I wouldn’t jeopardize your status, slave. But there will be times when we’re able to be alone. During those times, you drop being the boss and yield to the true one.”
She got quiet. “My brother has cameras in the office, though.”
“I know. You let me take care of that. No more worrying. No more questioning. That’s what I’m here for. Just submit to me one hundred percent. Can you do that? Right now?”
“There you go again with that ‘right now’. If I say yes, my mind is not going to change.”
My hands moved to her breasts and I squeezed the generous amount with a steady pressure. “It might. I still haven’t shown you who I am to the magnitude that you need to experience. You might not like who you see. Maybe you’ll come to realize that the man you thought you loved isn’t someone you want to spend your life with. Our time here will determine that for sure. Because once we leave this house, there’s no turning back, slave. Ever.”
“And if we don’t work out?”
The fear that clouded her eyes had the gray almost turning silver. I paused, caught in the amazing color. My words formed in my head and I could have cursed with what I was about to say. I hated it and wasn’t even sure I’d be able to comply with them.
“I’ll always be here for you, Lily. I love you, regardless of how you end up feeling for me. That’ll never go away. We’ve gone through so much. We’ve conceived a child together. Went through a loss, just the same. There’s nothing I wouldn’t do for you. If it’s helping you move on.” My jaw clenched. “To break from me once and for all and discover who you are, I’ll do that, too. Anything to see you at your happiest.”
Dark hair pooled around her shoulders as I took out each pin. The moment they were free, she lowered and rested her head against my chest. If I could have, I would have held her in that moment forever. It was our limbo — the moment before we started the testing, and the one place we were still in love with each other. Our illusion was real. But it was just that. An illusion. We weren’t who we truly were in the moment and to see if we’d make it, we’d have to spend more than a few hours here and there together. We’d have to experience everything, and the moment Lilian was rested, we’d begin.