“I think I’m okay, thank you. You do look tired though.” A thought ran through her head and she had to voice it. “God, I hope that isn’t the result of my meltdown last night.”
Jason just shook his head and took her hand. “Let’s not have this conversation here, Heather. We’ll go down and talk over breakfast. We have a lot to discuss.”
She felt safe when his big hand swallowed hers. The sensation still confused her, as did her disappointment at the missing kiss, but she couldn’t deny either. Yesterday his kisses had startled her and now, less than twenty-four hours later she found herself expecting them. Her mind was all over the place. How was she supposed to decide what to do if her thoughts and emotions changed from one moment to the next?
The journey down in the elevator felt a lot longer than it could possibly be. She couldn’t stop herself from staring at Jason, who looked back at her in silence. Something in his face had changed. Yesterday he’d been delighted to see her again, happy to have her here and eager to work with her. Now she couldn’t escape the feeling that just the sight of her hurt him in some way. She guessed she’d scared him off with all her drama last night. Who wanted to hire a party planner who couldn’t control her emotions? The last thing he needed while throwing a party that would make or break his business was somebody who couldn’t hold it together.
At least it meant she could stop agonizing. Cleary he’d decided she was not what he needed. They’d have breakfast, he’d break the news to her in as kind a way as possible and she’d be on her way.
Sadness engulfed Heather. Staying was obviously no longer an option and the thought hurt far more than she’d expected.
The restaurant had been transformed overnight. It might as well have been a different room. The light, bright and airy space in front of her barely resembled the dim environment they’d dined in. A huge breakfast buffet had been set up against one of the walls and on the opposite side, two large double doors opened to what appeared to be a patio area.
Jason’s hand on the small of her back felt good as he steered her toward the food. The layout was beautiful, the choices endless and both were wasted on her since she had no appetite whatsoever. Jason appeared to be feeling much the same. As she followed him along the long table, she noticed he was as disinclined to put food on his plate as she was. He ended up with a child-sized portion of the full Irish breakfast, which was better than she managed. A spoonful of scrambled egg and one slice of toast could hardly be called a hearty start to the day. Still, she’d be surprised if she managed to eat at all.
“Coffee for me, please. Heather, what would you like to drink?”
The question brought her back to her surroundings. Lost in her thoughts, she hadn’t even seen the waitress approach.
“Coffee would be great, Jason. Thank you.” She smiled at the young woman taking their order before following Jason as he led her through the double doors to a table on the far side of the patio.
The beautiful surroundings took her breath away. There was color everywhere. The garden was in full bloom and grew right up to the patio. Pathways twisted their way through the flowers in what appeared to be a random fashion. In the distance she could see water, a pond or small lake, surrounded by grass and deck chairs. For the first time since waking up, she smiled.
“It’s good to see you smiling, Heather. What’s so funny?”
Maybe it was safer to start off like this, on an easy subject. God knew the Irish were champions when it came to talking about the weather.
“I can’t help wondering how often you have the opportunity to put those chairs out.” She couldn’t stop herself from smiling again. “The West Coast of Ireland is not known for its beautiful weather.”
It was such a relief to hear Jason laugh, to see his face relax, even if it was only for a few moments.
“No, it isn’t. In fact those chairs are brand new. When the weather stayed warm and sunny for three consecutive days and the forecasts announced continuing high pressure, I decided I’d better provide some outdoor seating.”
The grin appearing on his face lifted Heather’s heart.
“Nudity allowed of course, although not required.”
She grinned back and sat down. She still didn’t have much of an appetite and started with her coffee. She couldn’t put this off for much longer. “Jason, listen…”
“Heather, I…”
She forced a smile. This was much harder than she’d expected. The realization she didn’t want to leave this place or this man at all took her by surprise. But it was for the best. He’d obviously made up his mind. If she had to leave she’d rather it was her decision.
“Just let me finish please.”
His nod was reluctant.
“I’m so sorry about last night. If I’d known how badly I would react I would never have gone to watch the demonstration with you.” She could see he was about to interrupt again and put her hand on his to stop him. “Don’t deny it, Jason, my reaction freaked you out.”
“Yes, but…”
“No buts, Jason. My behavior last night was over the top and out of proportion. I’m not new to this world. I didn’t agree to go there with you all blue-eyed innocence. I knew what to expect.” She took a deep breath. Getting all worked up about this wouldn’t help, after all, the hard part was still to come. “I completely understand you no longer want to work with me. I couldn’t have been more unprofessional if I’d tried.” She gave it her best but couldn’t quite keep the disappointment out of her voice. “Consider our contract terminated. I’ll pack and leave after breakfast.”
Eating would be easier than looking at Jason, so Heather picked up her fork and stabbed at the unappetizing pile of eggs on her plate. When he still hadn’t said a word after she’d worked her way through three forkfuls she dared to look up at the man across the table. Whatever she’d expected, it wasn’t the open-mouthed wonder on Jason’s face as he looked at her.
“Jason?”
“Excuse me? Master Jay, Mrs. Staunton, may I have a word?”
Heather looked up into the face of the beautiful young woman she’d watched the previous night. The redhead had been gorgeous in the dim lights, all flushed with desire. If possible, she looked even more fabulous in daylight. The sun lit up her hair, turning it into a wild flame. Heather glanced at the thin silver collar around the woman’s neck. Darren had never felt the need to collar her. She glanced at her left hand and the golden band on her ring finger. Of course there was more than one way of claiming your partner.
A frown appeared on Jason’s face. “Good morning, Amber. Everything okay?” His eyes shifted to hers. “I’m sorry. Heather, this is Amber Somerville. Amber, you know who Mrs. Staunton is.”
“Heather, please call me Heather.”
With nerves and regret already coursing through her system, Jason’s stiff formality only added to her apprehension.
“Pleased to meet you Mrs… Heather.”
The girl’s smile managed to be both open and shy.
“Everything is fine, Master Jay. My Master sent me down to invite the two of you for dinner tonight.”
A small stab of pain hit Heather. No matter how much this couple had reminded her of Darren and herself, or maybe because they did, she would have loved to get to know them better.
“That’s so kind of you, Amber. I’m so sorry it won’t be possible. I’ll be leav—”
“We’d be delighted to join you two tonight, Amber. Thank you, and don’t forget to thank Hector as well.”
As the young sub walked away, Jason shifted his attention back to Heather and registered the shock on her face.
“Jason, I just told you I’ll be leaving. I thought you’d be relieved. Isn’t that what you wanted?”
“No, Heather, it’s not.”
“Don’t lie to me. Don’t be polite. I saw your face this morning. I know I ruined it last night, I…”
“Heather, listen to me.”
He almost didn’t recognize his own voice. It had been a while since he’d used that tone with anyone. Heather’s gaze dropped instantly. Her simple but immediate reaction to his change of tone stirred feelings in Jason he didn’t want to examine too closely.
“My face and mood this morning had nothing to do with me wanting you to leave. Quite the opposite, in fact.”
He watched Heather for a reaction while she refused to look up from her plate with the unfinished, now cold, eggs. He reached out and gently lifted her chin.
“I want you to stay. I need you for this party. But it’s more than that.” He stopped himself. Now wasn’t the time to have that particular conversation, if ever. “I was worried you’d want to leave. I was sure I’d scared you away and wasn’t sure how to fix it.”
Fear gripped him. What if he was wrong? Maybe she really wanted to go and had only used his face or reaction as an excuse. “I don’t want you to go unless it’s what you want. I can’t ask you to stay if it’s only going to cause you pain. But please don’t leave because you think that’s what I want.” He hadn’t really been aware he’d been stroking her cheek. When she leaned her face into his touch, some of the tension he’d been holding evaporated.
“You sure you’re not just saying that because you’re feeling sorry for me? I don’t want or need your sympathy.”
He could see the conflict on her face. She wanted to give in, enjoy his touch, accept his offer but couldn’t allow herself to trust his motives. It didn’t matter. He’d convince her. She wanted to stay. His failure hadn’t scared her away. He’d get his second chance to get it right.
“You’ll always have my sympathy, Heather.” He watched her eyes as they heated up, glaring at him. “That’s not the reason I want you to stay though. I would like you to stay because you’re good at what you do and I need your help. I want to get to know you again. I like spending time with you.”
Decisions, decisions
. How far did he want to take this honesty?
“You’ve returned something to me I thought I’d lost forever. I want you to stay, even if you don’t want to be involved in the party.”
When her hand reached up to touch his, he held his breath. Would she remove it, reject his touch? His sigh was audible when her fingers stroked his and a small smile relaxed her anxious face.
“If you’re sure.”
This time she didn’t avoid his eyes and apparently found the confirmation she needed there.
“I’d love to stay and help you with your weekend.” Her small smile turned into a huge grin. “It’s going to be the best BDSM party Ireland has ever seen by the time we’re finished with it.”
He wanted to shout, punch the air, and couldn’t believe the prickling sensation in his eyes. Heather would be staying. He’d no idea how things would develop from here, but if she stayed, there would be opportunities to find out. He needed to know. He needed her here. He needed her too much.
Jason took a deep breath and thought for a moment. Last night and this morning had been emotional and difficult for both of them. Heather needed time to think about something else besides her job and all the other obstacles she might be running into. And he, he just wanted to spend some uncomplicated time with the woman he found himself more attracted to by the minute.
Her face was soft under his touch and the way she leaned into it warmed his heart. “Listen, I know we can’t postpone work indefinitely, but let’s ignore it for now. There’s a magical place nearby I would love to show you. We’ll get down to business in the afternoon.”
“Works for me, Jason.”
The last signs of tension left her body. It was good to see her face completely free of stress. There was no sign of worry, fear or strain. She should always look relaxed. A frown didn’t suit her. He would do whatever it took to keep her looking like this.
“I don’t know about you”—he smiled, feeling relaxed for the first time since waking up—“but I need another go at the buffet first though. I’m suddenly starving.”
Chapter Eight
He watched her come down the stairs and wondered if she had something against elevators or just enjoyed the exercise. She’d paid attention to his words. Jeans, a T-shirt and what appeared to be a waterproof coat over her arm.
God, she’d been made to wear jeans. Strike that, she looked edible in everything she wore, but these tight jeans were something special—not to mention the instant effect they had on him and his groin. The sensation reassured him as much as it worried him. Every time his body reacted to her, it filled him with gratitude. A part of him he’d thought had died turned out to be alive and happy to make its presence known. He couldn’t, shouldn’t, act on it though. Much as his mind and body were screaming at him to make a move, Heather had some way to go before she would be ready for everything his reaction to her implied.
“Good girl.”
Jaysus, where had that come from?
He bent toward her and gave her the kiss he’d denied both of them earlier, while relishing her reaction to his words. A small smile, a quick drop of her gaze, followed by a light return of his kiss. The perfect response, if only he hadn’t sworn he wouldn’t indulge that part of himself again. He couldn’t be trusted to get it right and Heather was too fragile to take chances with.
Jason forced himself to abandon that line of thought as he settled Heather in his Range Rover before getting in himself and driving toward the gates.
“Have you ever seen a blowhole, Heather?”
“Something called a blowhole actually exists?” Heather grinned. “I thought the name was a reference to either the amount of chimneys on your roof or some form of kink I haven’t yet encountered.”
Jason couldn’t help returning her grin. A relaxed Heather was delightful company. “Yes, blowholes are a real and rather magnificent natural phenomena. You’ll love it.”
“I’m curious now, tell me more.”
“It’s not easy to explain. You’ll understand better when you see it.” He thought for a moment. “A blowhole is a deep opening in the ground a short distance away from the shore. There’s an underground connection between the sea and the hole where water gathers. Every so often the water erupts. It is a powerful sight when a huge column of water shoots straight up into the air, only to disappear again.”