Authors: Hannah Foster
Popping open the locket, Nathalie stared at the tiny picture
of a 3 month old Jack. It was the only photo she had left, everything else had been destroyed. On the other side, tucked in behind the protective glass was a four leaf clover. Eric had found it during a trip to Dublin for a conference. He had given it to her over dinner and told her that it was clearly a sign from
the gods that they were meant to be. She had long carried it in her wallet as a sign of their love. Now she carried it in hopes it would protect her from anything else going wrong.
Snapping the locket shut, she shook her head. "It's the
past and he doesn't need to be bothered with it."
Mylea sighed heavily. "Nathalie, one of these days you are either going to have to tell that man the whole story or let him go. What
you are doing to him - holding him at arm's length - is almost cruel. He pretends to be satisfied with what you give him because he believes if he hangs in long enough you will eventually give him more. But if you aren't going to
give him more then you need to let him go."
Her green eyes blazed angrily. "I don't have more to give him" she retorted. "I'm giving him all I have and I'm sorry if that doesn't meet your expectations of how I should be treating him."
Unfazed by the outburst, the nurse simply shrugged. "That is all you have to give him because your heart belongs to someone else."
"Yes it does" she answered tightly. "It
belongs to my son."
"No, it belongs to the man you left behind. You are still in love with him."
Nathalie returned to folding her clothes and placing them inside her suitcase. She let Mylea's words hang in the air, refusing to respond
to them. There was little point in her even trying as she could not lie to her friend.
"I need you to keep a close eye on Baakir" she said, changing the subject. "He is refusing to take his meds and hides
them when he thinks no one is looking. We will never get him well if his infection does not clear up."
Mylea nodded as she got to her feet. "You concentrate on getting well" she said softly, "and we will worry about the
patients here."
Nathalie smiled sadly. It was always easiest to take out your frustrations and fears on those closest to you and her friend had certainly borne a significant brunt of both of those. She hugged her friend
tightly.
"And I will miss you" she told her. "Very much. It will be strange to wake up some place and not see you."
Mylea took both of her hands in hers and squeezed them.
"Nathalie, the universe is not random. Do not let opportunities to rebuild those bridges pass you by." Seeing the protest form on her lips, she hugged her again. "Be well my friend and we will see each other
soon."
As she slipped out the door she headed straight for her office. There was a number she had tucked away there and it was time for her to use it. Sometimes people needed help to rebuild.
#
Andrew let out a low whistle as he read over the chart.
"While the tumor is interesting," he remarked to Eric, "the medical history is even more so. This Doctor," flipping over the chart, he read the name. "This Doctor Thabo sure has been through the ringer. Burns,
breaks and now a tumor."
Eric nodded as he looked at the films. "Yeah. There were micro-fractures to the spine that I assume happened at the same time of the burns on their back. Leave it to Freidman to give me the case so he can get
in an extra week of golf."
"Guess this patient isn't one for the journals or there is no way he'd let you run with it."
"I'm kind of glad," Eric admitted. "I'd like
to talk to them about their work in Africa. I still....there are days I still think I'd like to go there."
The wistful look on his face was unmistakable and he paused for a moment before shaking his head. "Anyways, the sooner we can start
treatment the better. Based on the placement of the tumor," he said looking back at the film, "the headaches must be excruciating."
Looking over his shoulder at the films, Andrew agreed.
"The chart said something about seizures as well. Not surprising but I would imagine it's pretty hard to see to your patients if you're constantly worried about seizing."
"Yeah." Eric glanced at his watch. The patient was
scheduled to arrive in an hour and he wanted some quiet time with the chart and the films to be as well prepared as possible. "Hey Drew?"
Recognizing the look on his friend's face, Andrew put the
chart down and grinned. "I know, I know. Princess needs her space to get in this zone."
Andrew ran for the door, closing it behind him as Eric chucked a pen at him. With his shift almost over he headed to the cafeteria in
search of one more cup of coffee to see him through. He was sent reeling as a petite woman careened into him.
Reaching out he righted the woman. "Watch where you're....Sarah?"
Her eyes were almost wild with fear. Her normally meticulous
appearance had been replaced with some kind of homage to dishevelment.
"Where is Eric?" Her breathing was ragged as she dragged her hand through her hair.
"Why? Here to spread your special brand of humorless
cheer?"
"Shut up," she hissed angrily. "Where is he? I need to see him."
Bristling at her words, he pulled himself to his full height
and studied her carefully. "Is something wrong with Jack?"
She shook her head wordlessly.
"Then what is it?"
"Where is he?"
Exasperated at her unwillingness to answer his question he
exhaled slowly. "He's with a patient."
"Who?" She bit out as she reached out to grasp his arm for emphasis.
Shocked by her touch, Andrew glanced down to her hand
grasping his forearm and was struck, not for the first time, by the contrast of her fair skin against his own deep olive tone.
"Drew, who is Eric's patient?" Her grip on his arm
got tighter.
"Sarah, why does it matter who he is with? It is none of your business and if it isn't about Jack then you need to go. He doesn't need your sanctimonious, self-righteous, 'I am the keeper of all knowledge' crap. What he needs is-"
"It's Nathalie" she blurted.
Andrew said little for a moment as he tried to process what she had just said. "Wh-what? What do you mean it's Nathalie?"
"I mean his patient. His patient is Nathalie and I need
to get to him....to her...to them before they see each other"
He shook his head. "His patient is some doctor from Africa whose name is definitely not Nathalie Grant."
"Is it Thabo?" she asked urgently.
He blanched. "How do you know that?"
"Because that's her doctor's name. Nathalie is...was...in Africa. She was sent here for treatment."
"Eric has no idea what he's about to walk into" Andrew said as much to himself as he did to her.
"Neither does Nat. Andrew....they can't just meet like
this. Not after all these years, not after all that's happened."
Though his friend pretended he was tough he knew better than anyone that Nathalie was like kryptonite to him. The memory of her could still bring him to his knees; seeing her when he had no clue would be so much worse.
Grabbing hold of Sarah's hand, he tugged her along. "Let's go!"
#
Nathalie pulled at the hospital gown in a feeble attempt to
ward off the chill. She was exhausted and incredibly cranky after her long flight and the unnaturally chilly air floating down from the vent was not helping her mood. All she had wanted to do when they landed was to check into the hotel and sleep off the jet lag. She had been non-plussed to discover
Doctor Thabo had booked an appointment for her that very same day. Fearing she was going to say something to Keith she could not take back and just needing some time to herself, she had asked him to fill out the insurance paperwork for
her.
She could see the small tremor in her leg and knew a seizure was bubbling up.. Between the headaches and the seizures she had reached the point where at least half of every day was spent trying to recover from or ward
off an episode. She had dosed up on pain medication for the flight over but it did little to relieve the ever present headaches.
Keith, ever the investigative journalist, had researched almost every aspect of Doctor Freidman's career. He pulled journal articles,
research awards and media announcements about his advances. He told her he felt confident she would be in good hands. He was taking such good care of her - or at least taking as much care of her as she would allow - and she felt terrible
about it.
Her conversation with Mylea played over and over in her mind and she knew she was right. Her heart could never belong to Keith, no matter how much he wanted it to, because she was still in love with Eric. Knowing they
could never - would never - be together did little to diminish her feelings for him. She needed to have that conversation with Keith. She needed to set him free for to allow him to hang on any longer was indeed cruel. As she looked
down at her twitching foot she realized the conversation would have to wait for a few days.
A knock at the door pulled her from her thoughts and she looked up expectantly.
"Good afternoon Doctor Thabo, I'm Doctor Smitherman and
I'm-"
The words died on Eric's lips as his jaw dropped open. Pressing himself against the wall, he simply stared.
It was hard to tell who had the bigger shock. Nathalie blinked in silent surprise as she came face to face with the man who still had
her heart; certain that his presence in front of her was not real but merely a side effect of the tumor. She attempted to clear her vision but he remained in front of her, a stunned look plastered across his face.
"It's not p-p-possible," Eric stammered as the chart tumbled from his hands.
"Wh-what are you doing here?" she asked, dumbfounded.
"Me? Wh-what....how....it's not really you. How can it
be you?" His voice shook as he took a few tentative steps toward her.
The twitch in her foot became stronger and she pulled more tightly on the gown. "Eric" she whispered, unable to say anything
further.
The door to the exam room flew open with Andrew and Sarah rushing in stopping short behind Eric. "Nathalie!" Sarah cried, seeing her sister for the first time in seven years.
Nathalie looked from her sister to Andrew to Eric and realized she had been right. Her past couldn't swallow her whole but it could crush her. Opening her mouth to speak she found her tongue fat and uncooperative . Her entire body trembled as she tried to slide off of the exam
table. Whether she was going to fall into Sarah's arms or make a run for it she wasn't sure.
"Nat, I got the forms but who are listing as next of kin?" Keith paused in the doorway of the exam room and looked at the four
people all staring mutely at each other. "Nat?" he asked, brushing past Eric to get to her.
It was all too much. Her head pounded and her body shook and the last sound she heard before the seizure took hold was Eric calling her name
Feeling the fog from around her brain slowly lift, Nathalie gingerly touched her hand to her cheek and winced as she felt the bruise. If the tumor wasn't removed soon she was going to be black and blue from all the seizures. Carefully opening her eyes she sucked in a sharp breath as her past
and her present collided in front of her.
"Nat?" Keith called to her, touching her hand. "Nathalie, say something."
But she couldn't speak. She was hyperaware of Eric's
presence by her bed and she didn't need to look at him to know the contempt he felt for her. Glancing at Andrew, and the disdain she saw reflected in his eyes, she looked away quickly until her eyes landed on her sister.
Nathalie exhaled at the kindness reflected in her sister's clear, blue eyes. Sarah looked older but stylish as always. Whereas Nathalie had always been a jeans and t-shirt kind of girl, her sister had long ago developed a taste for fine clothes which seemed to serve as her version of
armor. Even in her worried state Sarah still looked like the model of business elegance.
"Sarah," she croaked
"Okay, everybody out" Sarah ordered.
The two doctors looked at her in shock. "Sarah, you aren't a doctor-" Eric began.
"You're right, I'm not. I'm her sister and I'm kicking all of you out until I have a chance to speak with her." She glanced over
at Keith who was staring at her in surprise. "You too."
He shook his head and looked back at Nathalie. "You never told me you had a sister."
"Nathalie likes to keep a lot of details to
herself," Eric said bitterly. "Doesn't want to burden anyone with them."
Her cheeks burned with humiliation and regret. She looked to her sister and silently pleaded with her for help. The walls were closing in on
her. Sarah grabbed Andrew by the arm and urged him towards the door; she gave Eric a look demanding he do the same.
Keith gave Nathalie's hand a squeeze and headed out of the room. Sarah pushed the door closed, took a deep breath and turned back to her
sister.
"Natty," she said softly.
Hot, angry tears tumbled down Nathalie's face as she hung her head in shame. "Sarah, I'm scared."
Crossing the room the normally restrained lawyer enveloped her sister in a tight, reassuring embrace as she had many times when Nathalie had been frightened or sad after their parents had passed away. "I'm here Natty, I'm here." Sarah whispered.
Nathalie let herself be warmed in her sister's arms for several minutes before gently pulling away and wiping at her tear-stained face. "Never....never in my worst nightmares did I think this would happen," she said, smiling weakly.
"Is it really a nightmare?" Sarah asked unable to hide the hint of hurt in her voice. "Seeing me - even seeing Eric - is it really so bad? Because I've missed you Nathalie. You are my only sister and
seeing you is more like a dream than a nightmare."