“My brothers don’t know about my past. They know I did something when I was gone for a few years, but I never told them anything about it. It was safer that way.” Why couldn’t anyone understand that Chase was only trying to protect the ones he cared about? His brothers never asked, which Chase greatly appreciated, but not telling his mates was becoming harder and harder as time wore on. Chase knew that he was either going to have to claim them or leave the two the hell alone. He just wished his wolf got the message.
“Does Reece know?” Joe asked, referring to Chase’s former alpha.
“He knows, as does your father. I felt it was only right to warn them what they were getting into when they accepted me into their packs. They both told me that as long as I was out of that kind of work, that it didn’t matter to them.”
“Are you?”
“Oh yeah.” Chase chuckled nervously. “I gave up that type of work ages before I even joined Reece’s pack. I thought I had left it behind, but since I called in some favors to rescue the Teacher’s pupils, I’ve heard some rumblings through the grapevine.”
Joe suddenly seemed very serious as he sat forward again. “Is this anything I need to know about?”
“Not yet. I’ve been keeping pretty low key, and so far, no one has found me. I’m kind of hoping that they don’t.” Chase held up his hand when Joe’s mouth opened. “And before you ask, the moment I heard rumblings, I told your father.”
Joe whistled, his eyes going wide. “Man, you do know how to do things with style, don’t you?”
Chase shrugged. “It’s a gift.” It was actually a curse, but Joe didn’t need to know that.
“Now you sound like Nate.” Joe shook his head, looking like he was trying to put the pieces of a puzzle together. “Do you have any idea who might be after you?”
“It’s better if you don’t ask.”
Joe held up his hands. “If that’s the way you want it, man. But I expect you to tell me if there’s going to be trouble. It’s my job to keep this pack and this town safe, and I can’t do that unless I know if there’s going to be trouble.”
Chase nodded. He knew he could agree to Joe’s request, especially since Joe wasn’t asking the deeper questions—at the moment. He wasn’t stupid enough to think they wouldn’t come at some point.
“Well, you’d better get to work before we both get fired.”
“Thanks, Joe,” Chase said as he stood and started for the door.
“Hey, Chase?”
“Yeah?” Chase paused at the door and glanced over his shoulder at Joe.
“Just a word of advice. Get whatever you need to figure out figured out before you lose whatever chance you have with Justin and Taylor. They won’t wait forever.”
“Yeah, I know.” As much as it hurt Chase to say it, he did know that Justin and Taylor wouldn’t wait forever for him. They were already getting fed up with him. It wouldn’t be too much longer before they were through with him altogether. “Maybe that would be better for them if they did give up on me. Safer, too.”
* * * *
Chase groaned and slapped at his nightstand until the loud blaring noise stopped. He rolled over and tucked the pillow under his head and tried to go back to sleep. When the blaring started up again, he reached behind him and smacked at his cell phone again.
He wanted the noise to stop.
He was so tired. He had barely gotten any sleep the previous night. Instead of being in bed where he should have been, he hadn’t been able to stop himself from shifting and going to sit in the trees just beyond Justin and Taylor’s back patio, hoping for sign of Justin.
There had been no sign of Justin or Taylor, but a light had been on upstairs all night long. It wasn’t until the wee hours of the morning that it finally went out. Chase had finally dragged himself home and fallen into bed.
As the blaring began again, he was positive that he had just climbed into bed five minutes ago. And the blaring wouldn’t stop. Chase grunted and rolled over, grabbing his cell phone. He flipped it open and brought it to his ear.
“What?” he growled.
“Chase, this is Joe Nash. I need you to come over to my house.”
Chase glanced at his alarm clock. The neon green LED lights read five thirty-three in the morning. “Are you out of your mind? Do you know what time it is?”
“Justin is missing.”
Taylor paced back and forth in front of the back door of Joe’s house, wringing his hands together and then shaking them out when they started to cramp. Justin was gone. Justin was gone. Justin was fucking gone.
He had just left. No word. No note. No message. No phone call. Justin had just packed a small bag, said he was going out to run some errands, and he had never come back. And Taylor was going out of his mind.
He had spent the better part of the last three years insuring that Justin was safe, and now he couldn’t even do that because the man had left. This was almost worse than when the Teacher had them. At least then, Taylor was assured that Justin would continue to receive his medication as long as Taylor played ball with the Teacher.
With Justin out in the world on his own, Taylor couldn’t be assured of anything. He didn’t know if Justin was taking his medication, when he would need more, if he was eating okay, or even if he had a warm place to sleep.
He was clueless.
And he was in agony. He couldn’t believe that Justin would just leave him like this. He had thought that they had something special together. Now, he was beginning to wonder if it had all been in his own head.
Maybe Justin didn’t want him now that he had a chance at freedom without someone like Taylor. Taylor had done things, bad things, and he knew it. But he had done them to keep Justin safe. Surely Justin saw that? Didn’t he?
Right about now Taylor wasn’t sure of anything. Doubts he never had before began to creep into his mind. Insecurities were taking hold. Why would Justin just up and leave him? Didn’t Justin treasure the relationship they shared as much as Taylor did?
The sound of a vehicle pulling up the driveway caught Taylor’s attention. With his heart pounding in his chest, Taylor rushed to the edge of the yard, hoping that Justin was coming back to him.
It was Chase.
Taylor had no idea what suddenly overtook him, but he was so angry, and he just knew this whole situation was all Chase’s fault. If Chase had just accepted him and Taylor, then none of this misery would be happening.
Taylor felt the need to make Chase hurt as much as he did. He rushed across the driveway as Chase pulled his truck to a stop. He had the door open before the engine even died. He started hitting at Chase, screaming at him.
“You did this!” Taylor shouted as he pounded his fists into Chase’s wide chest, barely noticing that Chase didn’t try to stop him. “Justin would still be here if you hadn’t been such a bastard.”
“Taylor—”
“Bring him back! I want Justin back!”
“Taylor—”
“I hate you!” Taylor’s shouts slowly turned into sobs as he stopped hitting at Chase and slumped against him. “I hate you,” he cried. “You made Justin leave.”
“Sshhh, baby,” Chase whispered as his arms wrapped around Taylor. “I’ll find Justin, and I’ll bring him back to you. I promise.”
“He…he needs me. He doesn’t have anyone to make sure he gets his medication or to make sure he eats right. He forgets these things. He forgets to eat.”
“I know, baby.”
Deep sobs racked Taylor’s body. His chest felt like a huge weight sat on it. He couldn’t seem to draw in enough air. Not even the feeling of Chase’s hands stroking up and down his back made Taylor feel better, and he had wanted that for weeks.
“Calm down, Taylor,” Chase said. “Deep breaths, baby.”
Taylor slammed his fist into Chase’s chest again, angry at the man’s simple endearment when it took losing Justin to hear it, but then his hand curled into the fabric of Chase’s shirt and he turned his face into Chase’s chest.
“He’s out there all alone, Chase. Justin can’t be alone. There’s no one to take care of him.” Just saying the words brought fresh tears to Taylor’s eyes. Justin was his world. He had been ready to make Chase his world as well, but he knew the man didn’t want that.
Chase didn’t want them.
That thought pounded into Taylor’s head. Taylor pushed himself away from Chase and wiped the tears off his cheeks. Chase might be able to say the appropriate words, but they both knew how the man really felt. Justin did, too, and Taylor had no doubt that was why his lover left.
Justin had hinted at leaving. Taylor didn’t think he was serious. He had wanted to give Chase just one more chance. He wanted what he thought the powerful man had to offer him and Justin. He wanted to share some of his burden with someone else. He didn’t want to have to be the strong one all of the time.
But that wasn’t going to happen.
So be it.
Taylor could do this without Chase. Justin couldn’t have gotten that far. He didn’t even take the car. Either he was on foot or he had caught a ride with someone. No one could miss Justin’s bright-red hair. Taylor could find him. And he didn’t need Chase to do it.
“Why are you here?” Taylor asked as he stepped out of Chase’s arms.
“Joe called me.”
“Justin’s gone, and it’s your fault.” Taylor wagged his finger at Chase, so angry at the man for denying him that spots danced before his eyes. “Is there anything else you need to know, Chase?”
Chase’s face darkened as he frowned. “Taylor, don’t—”
“Don’t what?” Taylor shouted. “Don’t blame you? Why not? It’s your fault Justin is gone. Justin wanted you so much, and you just had to deny him, didn’t you? What? Wasn’t he good enough for the big bad wolf? Is it because he’s sick? Is that it?”
Chases expression went through a metamorphous of emotions before settling on anger. His eyes narrowed and his lips thinned, but Taylor didn’t care. He didn’t care what Chase felt at the moment.
The only thing he cared about was getting Justin back.
“You have no right to blame me. I’m doing this for—” Chase clamped his lips shut, but his eyes still held the fire that was blazing like a furnace. Taylor slammed his fist into Chase’s chest and then backed away.
“Go fuck yourself, Chase. I don’t need your help. You’ve done enough.” He turned on his heel, heading for the house. He was going to find Justin if it was the last thing he did. It was up to Taylor to find his lover. He had to be the strong one in all of this. All Chase was doing was giving him excuses.
Taylor didn’t want excuses.
He wanted Justin.
He wanted Chase as well, but the man had proved time and again that he didn’t want Taylor, or Justin.
Taylor had tried reaching out with his telepathic link to find Justin, but the man was closing him out. He wouldn’t answer Taylor. And that worried him the most. Justin had never closed Taylor out before. Something had to be wrong if Justin wasn’t answering him.
Justin always answered him.
“Taylor, wait!”
Taylor glanced over his shoulder to see Chase catching up to him. He quickened his steps. He didn’t want Chase here because the wolf felt sorry for either of them. That wasn’t acceptable. He wanted Chase to want them, not pity them.
“Go away, Chase.” Taylor reached the door, ready to slam it in Chase’s face when the wolf caught the door, stopping it from closing.
“No,” he practically growled. “I’m helping whether you want it or not.”
“I don’t,” Taylor said as he tried to wrestle the door free, but Chase’s grip was solid and unyielding. “Will you let the damn door go?”
Not only did Chase release his grip, he pushed past Taylor and walked inside. Taylor stood frozen for a moment, unsure of what to do. Chase was too damn big to pick up and toss out.
“I told you yesterday that he was acting strange. Do you know where he would have gone?”
“Oh,” Taylor began, a stinging bite to his voice, “so you are trying to lay this at my feet? Get out, Chase!”
Taylor was near tears, and he wasn’t going to cry in front of Chase again. The man didn’t deserve to know just how distraught Taylor was over Justin’s absence. He didn’t deserve to be let into that private little circle.
The man hadn’t cared enough to claim them. So why should Taylor comfort Chase’s guilt? He wasn’t going to. He was too damned freaked out about Justin being gone to even consider making amends with Chase long enough to gain the man’s help.
Chase could take his help and shove it up his ass.
“Look, Taylor, we can argue about this later. Let’s find Justin first.”
“Why do you care?” Taylor snapped. “I’d think this would make things just that much easier on you. Justin isn’t here to bother you anymore or ask why you won’t claim us.” Taylor gave Chase his most scathing look. He felt the urge to spit at the man’s feet, but Nate would kill him for spitting on his kitchen floor. “You should be very happy.”
“Taylor!”
Chase looked shocked at Taylor’s words, but Taylor didn’t care. He blamed this entire mess on the tall man. If Chase had just accepted him and Justin, none of this would have ever happened. Taylor would have been happy if Chase had just accepted Justin.