But he had no choice if he didn’t want them hurt.
“Fine,” Taylor said as he slung his arms out to his sides, breaking Chase’s hold. “We’ll find Justin together. And after that, I never want to see your face again, Chase.”
Chase knew he would always remember the exact moment his heart died. It was right here, right now, in this very kitchen as Taylor’s words sank in and he stared at Chase with so much hate in his pale-blue eyes that Chase’s very soul shattered.
“Then we need to go.” Chase turned, walking out of the kitchen and feeling as if he would never be warm again.
His mate hated him.
It was what he deserved after everything he had put them through, and it was all in the name of protecting them. He headed for the front door, praying he could find Justin, and praying he wouldn’t curl up somewhere and die from the pain in his heart right now.
He slid into his truck and started the motor, watching as Taylor stiffly walked around the truck and got into the passenger’s side, not saying a word as he buckled himself into place. This was going to be one frosty-ass ride. His mate’s eyes were narrowed in anger, but Chase could see the underlying hurt in them as well.
“Where should we start?” Chase asked.
Taylor gazed out of the window for so long that Chase wasn’t sure the man was going to answer him. He finally shrugged. “I don’t know. I guess we could start with the bus terminals or the train station.”
“He would leave town?” Chase asked.
“I’m not sure what’s going on in Justin’s head right now. He won’t let me in.”
Chase nodded as he tossed his arm over the back of the seat and pulled the truck from the driveway. He put it in gear and headed down to the bus terminal. When he pulled into the parking lot of the bus terminal, Taylor jumped out before Chase even brought the truck to a complete stop.
“Taylor!” Chase shouted as he turned the engine off and then jumped out of the truck and took off after the man. He caught up with Taylor just as the man reached the main doors. “Taylor, damn it, slow the fuck down.”
“You fucking slow down,” Taylor snapped as he yanked his arm free and stormed into the bus depot.
Chase rolled his eyes and followed. He could see the middle ground was going to be somewhere in the arctic from the way Taylor was acting. He was being so cold that Chase was getting frostbite.
At least when they got inside, Taylor seemed to be willing to work as a team. He took one side of the room while Chase took the other. The checked the entire main room, the bathrooms, and a utility closet. They searched the food court and the vending area. They even checked the outside of the terminal where the buses parked.
Nothing.
No one had seen Justin.
Chase waited by the main doors as Taylor caught up with him. “Train station?”
Taylor shrugged and headed out, looking more downtrodden with every step. Chase’s heart went out to the man. He knew exactly what it felt like to lose someone close to him. He had lost both of his mates in his quiet campaign to keep them safe.
“We’ll find him, Taylor.” Chase tried to reassure his mate. He hated to see Taylor look so distraught.
“Will we?” Taylor asked in a deadpan voice. “How? He’s fallen off the face of the earth, Chase. It’s like he just disappeared. There’s no sign of him. If he did indeed leave of his own free will, then where in the hell is he? He couldn’t have gone far without someone seeing him. And it’s not like he is easily overlooked. He’s too beautiful to be missed.”
Yes, he was. Justin was breathtaking, but so was Taylor. Chase just couldn’t understand how Taylor couldn’t see that. Both men were gorgeous in Chase’s eyes.
“If we can’t find him by looking tonight, I have a few favors I can call in.”
“Favors?” Taylor’s head swung around as his eyes narrowed to tiny slits. “You can call in help and you haven’t already? What in the hell is wrong with you? Justin is out there all alone. We need to find him anyway that we can.”
“Taylor, it’s not that simple.”
“The hell it’s not!”
Chase sighed deeply. “You don’t understand.”
“I’m getting really fucking tired of you saying that.”
“And I’m getting really fucking tired of you yelling at me all of the time!” Chase knew that was the wrong thing to say almost instantly when Taylor’s eyes narrowed. Or maybe it was the wrong tone. He had shouted it at Taylor. But he was getting fucking tired of being yelled at. There were things at play here that neither Justin or Taylor understood.
“Look, Taylor, there are things about me that you don’t understand.” Chase ignored the small snort that came from Taylor. “And I’m not in a position where I can explain them to you. Needless to say, both you and Justin would be in grave danger if word got out that you were my mates. I can only use these favors as a last resort, and believe me, the second I feel I need to, I will. But I’m hoping we find Justin first.”
“Wouldn’t it just be easier to cut out the drama and call in some favors now and find Justin?”
Chase chuckled, although he felt anything but amused. “You would think so, wouldn’t you? But no, once I call in these favors, it will start the wheels turning on something I can’t stop.”
“Can you for once just stop speaking in riddles?”
Chase growled as he turned to face Taylor. The man was standing there with his hands clenched into fists, his face wrinkled with anger lines. Chase sighed and rubbed his hand over his face, and then started walking toward the truck.
There was no way he could explain to Taylor what was going on. He really didn’t think the man would understand. He suspected that the second he gave his secret away, Justin and Taylor would demand that he claim them despite the danger.
Or they would look at him like a monster and demand he get the hell away from them and never speak to either man again. He wasn’t sure at the moment which outcome he would prefer. Chase just knew he was becoming bone weary trying to keep his secrets from his mates. They just didn’t understand how great the danger was.
Chase hoped they never did.
Even if that made him out to be a complete asshole. As long as Taylor and Justin were safe, nothing else mattered. Except Justin wasn’t safe, and Chase didn’t know if the man had left on his own or had been kidnapped. And that scared Chase almost as much as the idea of never having the two sweet men as his own.
Chase climbed into his truck and slammed the door closed, anger over his inability to claim the two men riding him hard. He went to turn on the engine but let his hand fall as he leaned back in the seat and stared out the front window. He was sunk so deep right now that maybe it didn’t matter if his enemies knew where he was.
Chase knew the second he called for help, certain people with a grudge would get wind of his location. Maybe, just maybe, if he timed things right, he could call for help, find Justin, and get the hell out of town before shit came down on the heads of the people he cared for.
It was a plan anyway.
It was a better plan than idly sitting by and watching his mates grow to hate him.
Chase reached for his phone and dialed a number he knew by heart. It wasn’t in any phone book or registry. It was a phone connected to a secret satellite orbiting the earth. Only those who had the number could even access it. And it couldn’t be traced, not even by the government—any government.
“Chase Morgan, access node 57834. Code name: Ankle Biter.” Chase rolled his eyes as he repeated the code name that Marc had dubbed him with. He hated being called
Ankle Biter
. Marc thought it was hilarious. On the up side, no one would ever think of it.
“Accessing,” a bland, monotone computer voice replied.
Chase waited, hearing a series of beeps. He knew that the computer was analyzing his voice pattern and checking his location. Unless he passed the security protocol, he would never be connected to Marc, and this was the only way to get a hold of the man. Marc didn’t have an address.
“Access granted.”
Chase waited for a moment, and then he heard the phone give a series of clicks just about the time Taylor opened the passenger door and climbed into the truck. Chase glanced over to Taylor and then back out the front window when Marc came on the line.
“Chase, man, what kind of trouble are you in this time?”
“My mate is missing.”
* * * *
Taylor was so tired that his feet were cramping. They had searched almost every inch of Wolf Creek Valley, the town, the alleyways, the bars and restaurants, even the tow yard. There had been no sign of Justin anywhere. No one had even seen him.
Chase had even checked the hospital and morgue, places Taylor didn’t even want to think about but knew were a possibility. Thank fuck those avenues came up empty.
The more they searched, the more worried Taylor grew. He was starting to wonder if they would ever find his lover. Chase had assured him that if anyone could find Justin, his friend Marc could. But Chase had talked to Marc hours ago, and there had been no word from the man.
Taylor was starting to lose hope.
When Chase pulled into the parking lot of a roadside motel, Taylor turned to look at him. “Why are we stopping?” They had to keep looking.
“Taylor, it’s three o’clock in the morning. We need to rest. You need to rest. We can catch a few hours’ sleep here and get some grub, start out again at first light. But you’re dead on your feet.”
“I’m fine,” Taylor snapped, but he felt the weariness in his bones. He knew Chase was right, but he wanted to keep looking. His eyes were burning, and he was so damn tired that he could fall asleep right there in the truck, but he felt guilty for stopping their search.
Chase sighed and turned off the engine. “If you don’t get some rest, you’re going to be no good to me or to Justin. He needs you to be strong. And I need you rested so you can help me look for him.”
“I—”
“Taylor,” Chase said as he grabbed one of Taylor’s hands. “You need rest, baby. You’re not some sort of super soldier. You’re tired, upset, and frankly, you could use a bath.”
Taylor pressed his lips together to keep his chuckle locked behind his lips, but it did him no good. It slipped out anyway, which, Taylor was sure, was what Chase was hoping for. Taylor rolled his eyes.
“Fine, but we get a room with two beds.” There was no way in hell that he was going to spend the night in the same bed with Chase. His nerves were frayed enough. Sleeping next to Chase’s sexy body would send him right over the edge.
A grim look crossed over Chase’s face, pulling his eyebrows down low and pressing his lips together, but the man nodded. “If that’s what you want.”
It wasn’t, but that was the way it had to be. Chase had made his position more than clear, and Taylor refused to give in to the need he had for the bigger man, no matter how much he wanted to.
Chase didn’t want him for a mate, and that meant Taylor couldn’t give in to his feeling for the man. He wanted to mean something to someone long term, not as a one-night stand, and that was all he and Chase could ever have. Chase didn’t want more than that, and Taylor would never voice his need, and that left them in two separate beds.
Taylor sat in the truck while Chase ran inside and rented them a motel room for the night. When the man came out, he jumped into the truck and drove through the parking lot before parking in front of one of the rooms.
Taylor followed Chase out of the truck and upstairs to the second door down from the stairs. He waited while Chase unlocked the door and then followed him inside, looking around.
The room wasn’t fantastic, but at least it seemed clean. Taylor just wished he had remembered to pack a bag so he would have something clean to change into after a quick shower and something to sleep in.
“If you want to jump in the shower, I’ll run down to that fast-food joint we passed a couple of blocks back and grab us something to eat.”
Taylor nodded and started for the bathroom.
“Is there something specific you’d like to eat?”
Taylor shook his head, and then stopped, glancing over his shoulder at Chase. “French fries. I’d love some hot French fries.” With Justin’s diabetes, he had to watch his diet. And since Taylor took care of Justin, that meant he mostly ate what Justin ate. He missed French fries.
“French fries it is.”
The moment the door shut behind Chase, Taylor walked into the bathroom and started undressing. His shower was fast, just a quick scrub down and shampoo. He was so tried that his eyes burned and his head throbbed. He just wanted to eat, climb into bed, and pass out—and no necessarily in that order.
As the hot water pounded his weary body, Taylor wondered if Chase would try anything or let Taylor sleep in peace. He wasn’t sure which one he wanted the most. He was exhausted, afraid for Justin, and too tired to argue with Chase. His anger from earlier had dissipated, and all Taylor wanted right now was to find Justin and go home.
Never in his life had a day lasted this long. He had spent nearly twenty-four hours with Chase, the longest the man had ever been around him, and Taylor had to admit that he liked being with Chase—even if it was to hunt for Justin.