Marrying Kate (25 page)

A quietness settled over the house once they had left. Darlene took Dani upstairs and put her down for her nap before returning to visit with Kate.

"Are you tired?" Darlene asked as she poured another cup of coffee. "Do you need to go upstairs and rest?"

"I’m fine," Kate replied with a reassuring smile. "I got plenty of rest in the hospital. And it’s not like I’m doing anything super strenuous here."

"And you won’t be, if I have anything to say about it. I’m here to do all that kind of stuff. You just rest and recover."

"Well I won’t argue about the cooking since you
out cook me by far, but I’d like to be able to help out in some way."

Darlene shook her head. "You need to recover. Being shot is not a minor thing and you were very fortunate that that bullet missed all the important stuff."

"I guess God wanted me around for a little while longer," Kate said it lightly, but in her heart she wondered why she hadn’t been killed. Why that bullet had been so close but had not hit anything vital? A miracle, the doctor had said and Kate wasn’t in any position to argue with him.

"I think the good Lord knew the kids and Jared still needed you. They would have been devastated to have lost you."

The words she’d uttered to the man in the cabin came back to her.  At the time, pain had been clouding her feelings and had fueled the words she’d said. Now she wouldn’t say them, or believe them, but still a part of her wondered if they really would have been devastated if she’d been…killed. Not even a year after their parents’ death the kids were doing better than she would have thought. She hadn’t even been in their lives that long. Would it have taken much time to get over her? Another loss would have been difficult but most likely not unbearable. And Jared. Well, he probably wouldn’t have grieved too long.

"Don’t you be thinking otherwise, Kate," Darlene said, correctly interpreting her thoughts. "They need you. All of them, even Jared. Especially Jared. I know you all came together in a non-traditional way but you’ve become a strong family and if something had happened to you, it would have been very difficult for all of them."

Kate reflected on Darlene’s words. They were a family, and this last rough patch had drawn them even closer together. She hoped that it was the last rough patch for quite a while. They didn’t need another crisis like this one.

"You just sit right there," Darlene said as she stood to clear off the table. "Keep me company while I clean and don’t even think of helping."

Kate smiled at the woman who had become a close friend. "I won’t argue with you. You might feed me liver and onions for dinner instead of something scrumptious like fried chicken."

"You’re right about that!" Darlene returned her smile. "And Jared would send me packing if he found out I’d let you lift even a finger."

"Thank you for helping out," Kate said in all seriousness. "I don’t know what we would have done without you."

Darlene’s hands stilled in the dishwater and she turned to face Kate. "It is my pleasure to be here. I don’t like the circumstances that brought me. I don’t like that you’re hurting and came so close to death
, but I’m glad to be here to help out. I want to be here, Kate. Don’t ever think I’m here under duress or because I couldn’t say no. I love you, Jared and the kids as if you were my own family."

Emotion thickened the air. Kate swallowed hard and blinked rapidly to hold the tears at bay. "I appreciate it more than words can say. You’ve become like family to me, to us, too. I never knew my mother that well
before she passed away, and then Dad married Stephanie and we were just never close like mother and daughter should be. I’d like to think that my mom would have been like you had she lived."

Darlene dried her hands and came to embrace Kate. They had just ended their emotional embrace when Jared arrived home. He walked into the kitchen and stopped, looking from one woman to the other.

"Something wrong?" he asked, clearly nervous about the emotion on their faces.

Darlene gave him a pat on the arm as she headed back to her sink full of dishes. "We’re just fine."

Relief flooded Jared’s face. "I’m glad to hear that. You had me worried there for a minute." He turned to Kate. "Do you want to go upstairs and lay down for a while?"

Kate shook her head. "I’ve been laying down too much lately. I’d like to go sit outside for a bit if that’s okay."

Jared came and helped her to stand and together they walked out the sliding doors to the patio. Kate’s gaze immediately fell on her garden. The plants she’d torn up that dreadful night were gone and the earth smoothed back into place. She regretted now taking her anger and emotion out on her plants.

"I want to sit near the garden." Kate began to walk slowly
toward it.

Jared didn’t argue but followed close behind and then helped her settle on the grass at the edge of the garden. Kate burrowed her fingers into dirt, glorying in the feel of its nourishing moistness on her hand.

Kate closed her eyes and lifted her face to the warm sunlight. There had been a few moments that night in the cabin when she’d wondered if she’d ever feel the sunlight on her face again. And to be honest, there had been a few times when she’d even wondered if she wanted to. The sunlight would not have shone as brightly or warmed her as well if it had existed in a world where she was alone.

"Why did you rip up your plants?" Jared’s voice broke through her thoughts, drawing her from the sun back to the earth.

She lowered her head and opened her eyes. He had settled in front of her, his long, denim-clad legs stretched out. Kate’s gaze traveled over his tanned, muscular arms as they supported his reclining frame.

"
Kate?" She jerked her gaze up to meet his and saw the unanswered question there.

"It’s kind of hard to explain." Kate looked over to the now barren patch of garden.

"Can you try?" Jared asked.

Kate nodded, not really understanding why it was so important to Jared. "I had such hopes for this garden and similar hopes for our marriage, our family. That night after my... conflicts with you and Bry, I felt like I’d failed on both counts. It hurt to come out and see the garden flourishing in spite of everything. It seemed to mock me with
its beauty and growth." Kate reached out and touched the leaf of a nearby plant. "This garden was the one thing I had succeeded at and it was the most insignificant of all."

"You’ve succeeded at more than just this garden,
Kate," Jared told her. "You’ve gotten four children through what has probably been, and will most likely be, the worst time in their lives. You’ve helped me adjust to parenting and marriage. Those are the major points, but there are a lot of other things you’ve succeeded at."

Kate smiled slightly. "I appreciate your saying that. Things are clearer now, in the light of day so to speak, than they were the night I ripped up those plants."

"I’m sorry about the plants. That I drove you to do something like that."

"It’s all right. I still have nine other tomato plants. I think we’ll not lack for them this summer."

"Good thing I like tomatoes then, I guess."

They shared a smile and Kate felt a warmth that came not from the sun but deep within blossom to life in her heart. This was the silver lining around a very dark cloud, she thought. And slowly the cloud would fade but hopefully the silver lining would stay.

Neither spoke as they spent a few more minutes in the sun. Sharing silence was as intimate as sharing words. When Kate finally indicated that she was ready to go back into the house, Jared stood and helped her to her feet.

Despite her protests, Kate knew she needed a little rest. With Jared’s help, she made it up the stairs to their room. Not long after she laid down, she fell asleep.

Children’s voices woke her. Kate sat up, wincing at the pull of the wound on her back. She sat on the edge of the bed for a few minutes until the pain eased. Standing also sent a wave of pain out from the wound and again she waited until it ebbed away, leaving only a dull ache. With slow measured steps she made her way to the bathroom. A few minutes later she slowly walked out of the bedroom. She spotted Amelia and Candy in their room and went to talk with them before they headed downstairs for dinner.

Feeling refreshed from her nap, Kate wasn’t eager to return upstairs once dinner was over. Jared offered to
find a movie for them to watch. Darlene popped a big bowl of popcorn and set out some drinks. By the time Jared had found a suitable movie, they were all ready for an evening of movie viewing.

Dani was the first to drift off so Darlene put her down upstairs and then rejoined them. Candy and Amelia drifted off about the same time and once again Darlene, this time with Jared’s help, took the girls up to their room and tucked them into bed. Bry, proud to have outlasted all three of his sisters, made it to the end of the movie and then he too was sent off to bed.

"Are you ready to go up?" Jared asked once the four kids were down. Darlene was in the kitchen cleaning up the dishes from the popcorn and drinks.

Kate nodded, eager to once again spend the night with her husband by her side. It had been so long since he’d held her in his arms.
It felt like forever, Kate thought, as they climbed the stairs together.

Jared stayed with her, waiting while she changed into her nightgown and brushed her teeth. He even brushed her hair and then spent a few awkward moments braiding it. Kate closed her eyes, reveling in his nearness, the touch of his fingers on the nape of her neck, then between her shoulder blades. The warmth of his body radiated out to her.

She wished they could have stayed that way a while longer, but she eagerly climbed between the covers knowing he would soon join her. Kate knew there would be no physical intimacies that night, but just having him nearby, whispering together in the darkness, would be enough.

Once Kate was settled in the bed, Jared sat on the edge of it. "I’m going to do some work downstairs. If you need me for anything, just talk into the monitor. I’ll hear you on the other end."

Kate glanced in the direction he was pointing and saw a small monitor like the one they used for Dani. She squashed the disappointment that threatened to fill her. He had taken a lot of time off work for her, it was only natural that he’d need to do some catch-up work once the house was quiet and he could concentrate.

Jared leaned forward and brushed a light kiss across her lips. "Sleep well."

"I’ll try. The pills should help."

"If you need more just let me know."

Kate nodded and watched him flick off the lamp on the nightstand before leaving the room. She resolved to stay awake until he came to bed. Kate wasn’t all that tired since she’d napped earlier, she could do it.

The minutes flipped by on the clock next to her bed. Ten o’clock became eleven, which in turn became twelve. Weariness tugged at her eyelids, drawing them downwards as if weighted. Kate tried to fight it, to drag them open again but eventually she didn’t even have the strength to fight it. Instead sleep overtook her and her last thoughts as she slipped into the dark oblivion of sleep were that Jared would be there in the morning to hold her and that maybe they’d have their devotions together.

But when the sunlight streamed through the window the next morning, Kate knew she’d slept alone. Jared’s side of the bed was still made as it had been the night before. There was no indentation on the pillow to show where he’d laid his head, no lingering scent of his cologne teased her senses. Just cold, empty sheets where she’d hoped her husband would be.
 
 

Chapter Thirteen

Jared whistled as he slipped the single rose into the vase he’d found in the cupboard. He put the vase onto the tray and stood looking down at it, wishing he had more skill at putting together a breakfast-in-bed tray. Toast and coffee would have to do for this morning. Darlene would make a bigger breakfast later.

For the past hour he’d been up, listening to the monitor for the faint stirring sounds that would tell him that Kate was awake. He’d finally heard them about five minutes ago and had hurried to put the bread into the toaster and poured coffee into the mugs.

Jared picked up the tray and headed for the stairs. He had so wanted to crawl into bed with Kate last night, to hold her close and cherish her. He’d come so close to losing her that all he’d wanted to do was take her into his arms and never let her go. That would come, in time, but for now he had another plan. To woo and court his wife. The next time they came together, love would also be present.

Praying that he wouldn’t mess anything up, Jared shouldered the door of the bedroom opened and stepped in. He spotted Kate still in bed, facing away from him. He paused, worried that he’d misunderstood the sounds he’d heard.

Silently Jared put the tray on the dresser and moved around the end of the bed so he could see if Kate’s eyes were closed. They weren’t. She stared at the wall, her face drawn. Jared’s heart lurched in alarm. He dropped to his knees beside the bed drawing her gaze to him.

"Are you okay?" Jared brushed back a strand of hair that had escaped his pitiful attempt at braiding. "What’s wrong?"

Kate just stared at him for a long moment almost as if she were trying to figure out if he was real or a figment of her imagination. When she didn’t respond right away, Jared persisted. "Are you in pain?"