Misguided Truths: Part Two (Misjudged #4) (36 page)

“Clearing the dishes,” I smile around at the three of them
, and notice the instant relief crossing into her eyes. I grab my plate, then head around and grab the rest before making my way through to the kitchen.

This isn’t working. I thought that we’d be able to pull this off, but they’re already starting to ask questions, and that’s with us only being here for a couple of hours. We still have two full days here before we go back to how we were before. I really don’t want us to go back to how we
were. Alexis alone in her dorm; me alone in the apartment. I get it. I know I screwed up, but how many more times do I need to explain how much I know I truly fucked everything up before she gives me another chance? Well, at this rate, it seems like it’s gonna take a very long time, if not forever.

“Here, let me take those,” Paul makes his way over and takes the dishes from out of my hands. “Diane and I have a proposition for you and Alex, but it can wait until tomorrow now. Alex looks exhausted
, and you don’t look so far behind. Let me handle clearing these away and you two go and get some sleep.”

“If you’re sure because I don’t min—”

“No arguing. Go and get yourself to bed,” Diane interrupts me as she comes over to join the two of us. “Alex has already gone up.”

“Yes, mom!” I laugh out, and yep, this time she slapped my ass. “Someone’s feeling feisty! Maybe you guys should be the ones getting an early night in, huh?” I laugh har
der, but stop almost abruptly when I see Paul’s eyes widening up, and a deep frown etching over his face. Actually, they’re opening up so wide that I think I need to leave the room now before they pop right out of his head and he tries to sue me for damages or something. “Night!”

Yep. I’m outta here.

Once I make it up to the bedroom, I open up the door and see Alexis picking a few items out from her case, “Hey,” I say, offering her a small smile as I head toward her. “So, dinner was nice.”

“Yeah,” she briefly glances over to me, closes the case back up
, and then turns to face me, not quite managing to make full eye contact. “I’m just going to get changed.” She holds up her pajamas and goes to walk by me, but I put my hand out to block her.

“What? You can’t even get ready for bed in front of me now?” Wow. Things are much worse than I initially thought they were. “I hate this, Alexis.”

“Me too. But, it is what it is,” she shrugs her shoulders, and I let my arm drop so she can get by. “I’ll be right back.” I hear the door click closed, and run a hand through my hair
twice
. Yep. It just got
that
bad.

Searching through my bag
, I pull out some grey joggers and a black tank. Well, it seems highly inappropriate if I sleep in nothing but my shorts. Especially seeing as though Alexis went out of her way to purchase some new nightwear just for this trip. How do I know this? Well, firstly, Alexis likes to wear short nightdresses, either those or nothing at all. And, secondly, they still had the price tags attached to them.

I pull my shirt over my head
, and step out of my pants before folding them and placing them on the window seat. Switching on the table lamps on either side of the bed, I head over and turn the main light off before walking back over to grab the items I chose to wear to bed.

I hear the door click open behind me
, and glance over my shoulder to see Alexis walking back in the room, her eyes roaming over me. She’s never been able to hide it well, “You checking me out again?” I smirk, but I wasn’t expecting what I just said to make her cry.
Shit.
“Hey, I was kidding.”

She shakes her head
, and I can see that she’s trying not to let the tears fall. I don’t understand. She always used to laugh when I said those words to her. Yeah, no. It’s gotta be something else that’s bothering her. I take a couple of steps toward her as she takes a seat by the window. She’s gazing out over the backyard, and I scratch my head while wondering how best to approach this. Do I pull her in my arms, or do I keep my distance? Yeah, since when have I been able to keep away from her?

I take a seat on the opposite side, resting my legs up and beside hers while keeping my eyes on her, “You wanna talk about it?”

She rests her head back and closes her eyes, “This is a lot harder than I thought it was going to be. I always thought that when I had children I’d be set up for life. A good job, a nice house a wonderful husband right there beside me. But, look at me. I’m living in a college dorm, I’m nowhere near graduating, I have no job, and I have no…” Her voice trails, but I don’t think I really need her to finish what she was gonna say.

“I’ve completely fucked up your life.”

“No,” she looks right at me, her eyes red. She’s lying. She can’t lie, and she knows that I know this. “Okay, maybe a little bit, but only the part where you—”

“Please
don’t.” I wince because I don’t need her to remind me of what I did. Have I tried to forget that I betrayed her in one of the worst ways possible? Yep. But, it’s never gonna go away, not until she forgives me. I need her to forgive me for what I did to her. Earlier, I thought that she already had, but now? Not so much. “You look exhausted … um … you should try and get some sleep.” I stand back up and offer my arm out to her, but she breathes a heavy sigh and shakes her head again.

I watch her as she gazes back out the window, and then I turn away to
grab my clothes from off of the bed. Once I’m dressed, I walk around her room a few times before heading over to take a look at her book collection. There’s gotta be at least two hundred books here, “Was this before the Kindle was invented or something?” I tilt my head toward the ceiling to floor bookcase, and smile when I hear her laugh lightly.

“I always used to buy my favorites in hardback or paperback.”

“What? All of them?”
Wow, she likes her books
. I let out a small, low whistle and take a step closer. “You don’t have a specific favorite?” I slide my hands into the side pockets of my joggers and roll back and forth on my heel a couple of times.

When she stands up, her arm brushes with mine as she steps beside me, “Did you want to read one or something?” she asks, and she’s holding a quizzical look in her eyes. “I di
dn’t know you were into books. Okay … here. This one is pretty great.”

She reaches over
, and I see her take one from off of the middle shelf before passing it over to me, “The Whole Ten Inches of … wait a second. You have porn?” This shocks me. Alexis stashes porn.

“Wha
t? No! Do you need glasses?” her voice is filled with shock, and she snatches the book back from me, hits me across the chest with it, and then holds it out in front of me until it’s only a couple of inches away from my face. “The Wonder that is Love, by Jodi Knight and Molly Booth.”

Yep, I was right
, “So, it’s trashy then.” I hear her breathe out an exasperated sigh, and see her starting to shake her head from what I just said.

“Trashy? Are you kidding me? It’s one of the most romantic novels that’s ever been written.” You know what’s good? This. Alexis holdin
g a gleam of excitement within her eyes, and the smile that she’s now wearing across her face. I haven’t seen her this passionate over something for a while. A very long while. “What? Why are you smiling at me like that?”

“It’s just good to see you smiling again, that’s all,” I tell her. Hey, I’m just being honest. “So, do you mind if I take a look?” She eyes me curiously for a second, and then
passes it back over to me. I can feel her gaze burning into my back as I take a seat back at the window. Resting my legs across the cushions, I move closer to the glass while opening up the first pages.

“Are you seriously going to read it?” she sounds surprised. Wow, anyone would think that I couldn’t read or something from the way she’s acting. I nod while keeping my eyes focused on the pages. “Okay …” I wanna laugh from the way she just reacted, but I won’t. Not this time.

She comes to take a seat beside me, bringing her legs up and wrapping her arms around her knees. Leaning over to see the pages, I feel her warm breaths breeze over the right side of my face, “Do you want me to read you a bedtime story?” I muse, but she doesn’t laugh, and instead, she nods her head while letting out a long yawn. “Alright.”

I get through at least three chapters before I feel her head resting on my shoulder, and when I glance down, I see
that she’s already fallen asleep. I bring my right arm up, wrap it around her shoulders, and smile when she nestles into me. By the time I reach the fourth chapter, her eyes are fully closed and her arm is wrapped tightly around my waist.

Closing the book, I place it down beside me and go to move her, but she huddles in some more. If I move her now then I’ll most likely disturb her sleep, so I decide to keep her here in my arms for the rest of the night, holding her by my side, wishing, hoping, and praying to God that this isn’t gonna be the last time we’re this close to each other.

Chapter Thirty-One

 

Alexis’ dad’s proposition?

He bought us a house. Yeah, I know. I didn’t quite believe it myself. In fact, you can hardly even call it a proposition considering he already has the house keys
within his possession.

When we went downstairs for breakfast this morning
. there were two sets already placed in the center of the table. Haven’t they figured out that we’re not together anymore? Nope. It seems that I’m quite good at this whole acting thing myself.

“This is it,” Alexis draws my attention back as she parks the car by the side of the street. I glance up, see that we’re in the suburbs of Seattle, and sitting back from the roadside is a three-story house with a huge front yard.

Honestly? I don’t even know why I’m here. Yeah, they still think we’re a couple, but when he told us about the house then we should’ve fessed up and told the both of them. And, things just got a whole lot more complicated, because at this very moment, they’re parking up behind us.

Both he and Diane insisted that they wanna see our faces when we step inside our new home for the first time. What they don’t yet understand is that it’s not gonna be my home, so the only thing they’re gonna see over my face is a deep frown, and all I’ll be thinking about while we’re taking the tour is ‘what if?’

“Alexis, I’m not so sure about this,” I admit and twist in my seat until I’m fully facing her. “We should tell them.” I immediately feel bad when I see the sorrow in her eyes, and my shoulders slouch down in defeat. “Soon then.”

We won’t be able to keep this up forever. They’re gonna know something’s up when they don’t see any of my things around the place when they come and visit. Yeah, it hurts. I’m not gonna be around. It’ll be like I don’t even exist. Well, okay. It won’t be that bad, but pretty damn fucking close.

“Soon,” she answers before climbing out the driver’s side. Yeah. I’m not so sure I believe her either.

All things considered, the short time we spent together in Salem went pretty well. It was just like how we were before. We talked, we laughed, she snored, I laughed some more, and I was enjoying being there with her. I was looking forward to spending another night alone with her in her room tonight, but because of Paul and Diane’s surprise, we’re not gonna
have the opportunity to do that now. Nope. Tonight I’ll be alone in my room, and she’s gonna be spending the first night in our new place on her own.

They told us they bought th
e house right after they found out that Alexis was expecting, but they didn’t mention anything before now because they wanted to get the place up and together so it would be ready for us to move straight into. It’s an extremely generous gift, and the relief over Alexis’ face when she realized that she no longer needed to worry about where she was gonna live was a really good thing to see. I just wish I was the one who could’ve done this for her, and not only that, I wish I could be here with her like I was always supposed to be.

A tapping sound on the passenger side window brings me out from my thoughts, and I see Diane standing on the other side of the door, wav
ing her hand around impatiently.
Alright, let’s get this over with.

I unfasten my seatbelt and go over to join them on the sidewalk. Alexis throws me a smile, but doesn’t keep the eye contact for long, and we walk side by side behind Diane and Paul as we make our way along the pathway and up onto the porch, “You’re both going to love this!” Diane clasps her hands together excitedly as we step inside.

It’s decorated in neutral colors, and as we walk around the ground floor, I notice that there’s already some furniture and a few finishing touches in each of the rooms. Hell, they even have coffee mugs on the counter top and magnets on the refrigerator, “Well, what do you think?” Alexis’ father wraps his arm around my shoulders. “Could you see yourself living here?”
Not the right question, Paul. Not the right fucking question to be asking me right now.

When I don’t answer right away, I see the look of worry crossing over Alexis’ face, “You know wha
t?” I keep my gaze fully fixed on her the whole time. “I could. I really could.” He pats my shoulder a couple of times before heading over to join Diane in the kitchen. Alexis comes to step beside me and offers me a small, yet sad smile.

“Thank you,” she w
hispers and goes to walk away, but before she has a chance, I reach out and gently grab a hold of her arm. She pauses, and looks right up at me with a questioning look entering her eyes.

“I wasn’t lying,” I answer, my mouth
now forming in a tight line, a seriousness evident within my tone. I drop my hand away from her, but she stays standing beside, studying me for a brief second.

She opens her mouth and goes to speak, but I shake my head and walk back toward the hallway. I think I need
to take a couple of minutes away so I can try and get through this bullshit, “Don’t be sneaking off upstairs without us!”
Awesome. Trust Diane
. “We want to see the look over your face!”
Yeah, we know.

The four of us make our way on to the first floor, and I follow them toward one of the white wooden doors just along from the top step,
“Surprise!” Diane and Paul say in unison while opening up the door. They step to the side to give us room to walk by them, and Alexis walks in first, with me following closely behind her.

Wow. Just. Wow.

“Oh my God,” Alexis says, lifting her hand up to cover her mouth as her eyes dart around the whole room. “This is …”

“Unbelievable,” I mumble
, and slowly walk further inside. Yeah, this room is fully furnished right down to the set of plush toys that have been placed on the shelving over on the opposite wall.

Seeing
everything in its place is starting to make this whole fucking thing so much harder to deal with, and it takes all of my will not to say something. If I do then I know I’m gonna sound like an ungrateful son of a bitch. I’m thankful. I am. But, seeing all of this is just making me feel like the biggest loser in town. Why? Well, that’s easy. I should be the one taking care of her. I’m the one who was supposed to build the crib for our baby. Me. Not them.
Me
. I wanted to be the one to do all of these things.

“There’s a rock
ing chair over in the corner because we thought it would come in useful for when you’re feeding through the night, or day, whichever!” Diane walks in the room and heads straight over to sit down. “The first few weeks will be exhausting, but I’m sure you’ll both do just fine.”

Alexis nods her head slightly, briefly glancing toward me before walking over to gaze out
of the window, “Me and your mom used to take it in turns. I’d do a couple of nights, and then she would do the next two. It worked out well for us that way.”

I take a deep breath and close my eyes. I can’t do this. It’s too much. I’ve gotta get outta here, “I left my cell in the car,” I mumble under my breath, and head out the room and back down to the ground floor.

Alright, I get that they don’t know what our circumstances are, but I couldn’t stay in there and listen to them going on and on and on about all that shit. I just couldn’t.

“What’s wrong?”
Like she really needs to ask me that.
“Brandon?” Alexis walks up behind me when I reach the main door, and rests her hands on my shoulders.

I spin around to face her and she takes a
step away, “I can’t do this, Alexis. I can’t be in the same room as them when they’re saying all of that stuff. I told you I was alright with this, but I’m not. I’ve never been alright with this.” I wave my hand between the two of us.

“I understand that it must be hard for you to pretend—”

“Don’t you get it yet? I’m not! I’m not pretending. I never have been and I never will be!” I grind out in a harsh whisper, and notice that she instantly flinches away. Resting the back of my head against the door, I let out a sigh and close my eyes. “Look, I’m sorry. I just … I wanted to be the one to do all of this for you.”

“No. No, I’m sorry,” she shakes her head
, and then quickly glances over her shoulder before bringing her eyes back to mine. “I’ll tell them that you had to go or something. I’ll say that work called and you had to go and help out.” What she’s suggested will work for today, but what about tomorrow? Or the day after? Or the day after that? I shake my head and push myself off of the door. Once I’ve grabbed a hold of the handle, I glance over my shoulder and see the sadness seeping into her eyes again. “Thank you for trying.” Her voice is small, and she wraps her arms around herself before turning around and heading back toward the stairs.

“Hey, Alexis?” I call after her, and see her pause on the second step before she hesitantly turns back around.

“Yes?”

“I packed one of my shirts inside your bag,” I begin. Nope. I’m not gonna let it lie. “I thought you could smell it before you climb into bed tonight, so you’ll be reminded that I’m not the only one who’s finding this whole thing completely fucked up.”

I don’t wait for her to answer me because I don’t need to. She knows exactly what I’m talking about. Do you remember when she came to pick me up from my apartment and I caught her doing something? Yeah, well, she was clutching one of my shirts in both of her hands, and holding it up to her face. Yep. She was smelling my shirt. Now go ahead and tell me that she’s not missing me as much as I miss being with her.

“Brandon?” I hear her shout
out to me when I make it through the front gate. “I’ll call you later.” I nod once before heading back toward my apartment
.

She’ll call me.  

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