My Guardian Knight (17 page)

Sebastian's taunts had the desired effect.  Avery's grip loosened and he took a step forward, shoving Amanda aside.  She tried to steady herself, but the prior blows had made her a bit dizzy, and her shoulder slammed into the wall, sliding like a wet noodle to the floor.

Sebastian's eyes narrowed dangerously as he saw the woman he loved treated so callously.  Long years of training prevented him from acting rashly, and he resisted going to her with every fiber of his being, focusing all his attention on Avery.  He knew what the man was capable of and was determined to keep Avery's evil as far from his family as he possibly could.

              "I hear you turned in your badge," Avery mocked. 

"What's the matter, Knight, couldn't handle it?"

"I didn't want to stand around watching you hang innocent people and not be able to do anything about it.  I know what you've done, Higgins."  His deep voice was low and menacing.  "I've given the information to the proper authorities and soon everyone will know what you've done. 

Then, it will be your neck on the line."

Quick as lightning, Avery pulled his gun.  "Drop the weapon, Knight."

              Calmly, Sebastian tossed his gun to the ground, sparing a glance at Amanda.  She was standing by the fireplace, looking down.  When he had a chance to follow her gaze, he understood what she planned to do.

Avery advanced on Sebastian, pointing the gun right between his eyes, smiling coldly.

Standing firmly in place, giving no hint that he felt the slightest bit nervous, Sebastian said, "It doesn't matter what you do to me, the information has already been handed over.  There's nothing you can do now but wait.  Or run, as you've forced Amanda to do for years."

Amanda cried out, causing Avery to turn toward her and, as he did, she swung the hot poker in an arc, catching him across the middle.  Unfortunately, the scalded tip completely missed his body.  Sebastian rushed him, but Avery recovered quickly and both men gripped the gun, which was held between their bodies.  They stumbled backwards and, when Sebastian's back collided against the table, they tumbled over it and landed on the ground with a thud.  

Both men were large and muscular, and neither one could gain the upper hand as they rolled out the door.  Amanda looked on with horror as they fought for control, the gun still held between their bodies, and prayed fervently that Sebastian would be unharmed.  She could think of nothing that she could do to help because, even though she now had access to Sebastian's gun, there was no way she could get a clear shot.  They were tumbling to and fro, each of them gripping the weapon with both hands, but they were too evenly matched.

She wondered where John was, since he was supposed to be watching out for her and she had not seen hide nor hair of him since this morning.  She knew Sebastian would have told him to keep an eye on the house when he left for town, and she thought it was strange that he was nowhere to be seen.

Amanda looked wildly around the cabin, desperately searching for something--anything--that she could use to help Sebastian gain control of Avery, but she could find nothing.  A glimpse out the window showed her that, thankfully, Matthew and Marissa were still safe and sound at Sharon's house.

She returned her attention to Sebastian at the same time as she heard the loud report from the gun, and both male bodies that had been grappling on the ground went perfectly still.  She screamed, running forward, terrified to the very core of her being that the deep red blood that was beginning to stain the ground flowed from Sebastian's body.  She called his name, falling to her knees on the ground beside him, no longer caring about what Avery might do to her.  She smoothed the hair from his forehead, placing soft kisses on his cheeks, tears that streamed from her eyes falling to wet his lips.

              With a sudden bucking motion, Sebastian knocked

Avery's lifeless body off of him and sat up, smiling at Amanda.  She threw herself into his arms and they fell backward to the ground.  She didn't care that Avery's blood stained her dress, all that mattered was that Sebastian had come out of it alive.    He kissed her deeply, tenderly feeling her head to make sure she hadn't sustained any serious injuries.  "Oh, Sebastian, I--"

She was cut off by a noise that sounded like thunder, but there wasn't a cloud in the sky.  They sat up and looked toward the sound, surprised to see what looked like an entire army riding quickly toward them.  

Sebastian stood up, pulling her with him, and placing an arm around her waist to support her.  He smiled at her in reassurance and murmured, "Reinforcements."

Amanda stared in wonder at the dozens of horses that galloped toward them, Avery's lifeless body forgotten.  They stopped a few feet before the house, and a large officer dismounted, stepping up to face Sebastian.  

Sebastian saluted, and his salute was returned.  Then the officer grinned, clapping him on the back.  "By the looks of your clothing, I'd say either you're running a slaughterhouse in your spare time, or Avery Higgins arrived here before us."

              Motioning behind him, Sebastian said, "I did the best

I could.  It was either us or him."

The officer nodded.  "When I think of what that bastard has gotten away with--" he shook his head, apparently able to find no words strong enough to describe the havoc Avery had wreaked upon innocent people.  He shook

Sebastian's hand.  "It's better this way.  Even with the evidence you'd collected against him, there was no way to know whether he would be made to pay or not.  Good work, Knight.

              "My apologies to you, Mrs. Knight, for being unable to prevent such a harrowing experience.  We've been tracking

him for a long time, but he's a slippery fellow."

Amanda nodded, absently scratching at the blood that was drying on her arms.  "I am just relieved it is all over."  She glanced at Sebastian.  "About the warrants out for my arrest--"

              The officer held up a hand.  "Taken care of. 

Sebastian told us everything.  You are a free woman, Mrs.

Knight."

The words rang in her ears like the toll of doom.  Some of the officers slung Avery's body upon a horse and with a wave they headed back from whence they had come. 

Taking her hand, Sebastian gently pulled her toward the house, sitting her at the table.  "Stay here until I get back,"

he said tenderly, "I have to find out what happened to John."

              "I want to come."

His eyes darkened.  "Amanda, I've no idea how I'll find him."

"Still, I want to come.  You may need my help."  He relented, holding her hand as they headed quickly toward the stable.  There they found John, bound and gagged, and fighting angrily to free himself.  When he saw the young couple, and their bedraggled state, he blew out a breath of relief.  When he'd been released, he grabbed them both in a bear hug.  "He caught me off guard, the son-of-a--"

              "It's all over now," Sebastian said.  "Go to Sharon's

and ask her to keep the kids for the evening."

Turning on his heel, he led his lady back to the house, once again sitting her down at the table.  He heated a cup of tea for her, and while she sipped at it, he silently heated water for a bath.  Once the tub was full of steaming water, he helped her undress and eased her down into the warmth.  She stared into the fireplace as he shed his clothes and joined her.  Amanda leaned back against his hard chest, feeling all the fear and mixed emotions she hadn't had time to while she was dealing with Avery.  She laid her head back against his shoulder as he built a soapy lather and gently washed the blood from her tired and aching limbs.  He worked the lather into her hair, firmly massaging her scalp until he felt her beginning to relax.  Then he held her until the steaming water cooled.

Washing himself quickly, he jumped out of the tub and dried off, then lifted Amanda into his arms, seated her in a chair, and buffed her body with a towel until it looked pink and healthy again.  She looked up at him with sad, tired eyes, and he kissed her forehead before carrying her into the bedroom and depositing her under the warm covers.  Even though the sun was just beginning to kiss the horizon, he blew out the candle in the bedroom and climbed in next to her, wrapping his arms protectively about her worn-out body.  She snuggled against him, and his warmth surrounded her, bringing with it the now familiar feeling of safety and peacefulness that his touch always bestowed upon her.  She kissed his bare chest before drifting off into an exhausted slumber.

It had been one week since Avery's death, and the euphoria that they had expected to rush in upon them had yet to come.  Instead, it seemed as if the battle with the corrupt lawman had only accelerated the end of their time together.  Although it hadn't been a year since she'd come to stay with them, Amanda knew with a certainty that made her ill that it was time to move on.  

She had wandered around the house this past week, going through the motions of cooking, cleaning, and caring for her family, all the while knowing that it wouldn't last.  She was near tears constantly.  Every sweet smile from Marissa had her blinking rapidly in an attempt to control her emotions.  How could she live without that child?  And Sebastian, well, she could hardly even bring herself to look at him, so great was the anguish she felt at the thought of leaving.  She couldn't bear the pain any longer.  The anticipation of walking away was driving her mad.  She couldn't eat, couldn't sleep, and couldn't think straight any more. What she needed was to get it over with.  Put this life behind her so she could begin the healing process.

She was standing at the table chopping carrots for stew when she heard Sebastian talking to her from the bedroom door.  Amanda didn't listen to his words, instead letting the sound of his voice wash over her. 
Remember how deep and soothing that voice is, Amanda, you'll be hearing it in your dreams for a long time to come. 
She didn't say anything, just kept chopping.  He walked up behind her, standing but a foot away, making no attempt to touch her.  She didn't turn around.  They said nothing and, for the first time since she'd met him, his presence did not make her feel comforted.

She could hear him breathing behind her, and tears clogged her throat, but she bravely fought them down. 
You'll have the rest of your life to cry over him
, she reasoned,
there's no need to start now.

Sebastian didn't know what to say.  He had absolutely no hope anymore that she might remain with him.  He was afraid that he'd already lost her.  He knew how preoccupied she'd been this week, and he knew that she was thinking it was time to leave.  He'd try his best to convince her to stay, at least for the rest of the year, but he'd be damned if he'd rush the subject.  She was struggling with herself, and he'd just let her struggle and hope that she changed her mind.

              She turned around to face him, her eyes bright. 

"Sebastian--"

He swallowed thickly, turning to leave.  "I have work to do out--"

A touch to his arm stopped him, and reluctantly he looked at her, hoping all the misery he felt wasn't written on his features.  Her eyes were like dark, melted chocolate, swimming with tears and wide with pain.  He could tell she was having a hard time finding the words she needed to say. 

He loved her.  He didn't want to see her suffer.  

"You're leaving," he rasped.

              She nodded, her throat convulsing.

"But you promised to stay a year.  I fulfilled my promise to you, Amanda.  What about your promise to me?" 
I don't want you to go,
he thought.

"Oh, Sebastian," she sighed, "it just didn't take a year.  The entire town knows what a wonderful father you are, and no one would dare take Marissa away from you," her voice cracked at her beloved little girl's name.  She gave him a watery smile.  "Mrs. Amos would never allow it, anyway." 
I love you, Amanda; don't leave me,
he wanted to say. 

So tempting was the thought of dropping to his knees and begging her to marry him that for a moment he could concentrate on nothing but resisting the urge.  He had asked her to stay.  She had refused.  Why, then, did she look so miserable?

              "Are you sure you wouldn't like to stay longer? 

Amanda, I know you are able to make it on your own, but you

are welcome to stay here as long as you like."

His words caused her throat to constrict with tears. 
Tell me you love me,
she begged silently. 
Tell me that
you
don't want me to go and I'll stay with you forever!
 
I need to know that you
want
me.  No one has ever wanted me.

She shook her head, feeling as though it weighed a ton.  "You and I both know it's time.  Both of our promises have been kept.  If there is no reason for me to remain here, I must get on with my life, and you must get on with yours. The longer we put it off the harder it will be--for the children," she added.

He took her hand in his, tracing a path on the palm.  "Amanda," he whispered, looking deep into her eyes and shaking his head, "you're already gone.  You've been moving around here for days, in some sort of trance, and I've known what was going through your mind.  If you think you need to go, then, by all means, do so."  He turned on his heel and strode out the door, letting it slam shut behind him.

Amanda didn't know how long she stood there, staring, thinking it might not be all that bad to stay with a man who didn't love her, but at least, liked her.  

              And then she came to her senses.

That night, after the children were tucked snugly in bed, Sebastian came to Amanda in the bedroom.  They stared at each other for long moments and then, she never even knew how it happened, she was in his arms.  He was kissing her neck, her cheeks, her eyelids, licking her lips lingeringly, nibbling on the soft flesh beneath her ear.  

Amanda clung to him, desperate to have this one last night, hoping against hope that he would suddenly realize that he couldn't live without her.  She ran her fingers through his hair, up and down his muscular back, rained kisses on his hard, solid chest that she so loved. 
I love you
, she repeated over and over again in her mind, praying that, on some level, he would hear her and reciprocate.

Sebastian lifted her in his arms, kissing her deeply, until she felt as if she were a permanent part of him.  Her mind reeled, she could think of nothing but Sebastian and how she would do anything, give
anything
, if only this night would last forever.  If only she could make him fall in love with her.

They fell onto the bed, still locked in a passionate embrace, still lost in a pretend world where anything is possible.  

Still wishing the other might one day fall in love with them.

Still blind to the fact that their one wish had already been granted.

Amanda cried out as he brought her to the very peak of pleasure, holding him as if she never planned to let him go.  And as they spiraled down from the height they had taken each other to, they sought sleep to escape the very depressing depth of reality.

But sleep was as elusive as their dreams.