My Real (2 page)

I packed most of my teacher’s manuals and all of the supplies I’d need to work on curriculum over the summer during lunch, so I don’t have much left to carry to my car. Another coffee mug to add to my growing collection, which is funny since I don’t even drink coffee, and my favorite end of the year gift ever, a huge bag of Hershey Kisses are all that I have left to pack. The kids all know my chocoholic tendencies, especially Kisses. I’m going to need a few of these bags to get me through this summer without Dave.

Ella snaps me out of my daze when she slams her door shut behind her.

I’ve known Ella for the ten years we’ve taught third grade together at Riverdale Elementary. We were hired on the same day and have been best friends ever since.

“I don’t really feel like going out tonight. I’d rather just sit in my hammock in my sweats with a book, drinking chocolate milk, and eating Kisses. I am 33 years old, I have no right to be going out to clubs to pick up guys,” I reply as we walk together to the office to check out.

“Absolutely not Bailey Marie.”

Oh no. She used my middle name. I know I’m in trouble when Ella uses my middle name.

“You’re going out. You’re not going to spend the summer in a chocolate coma. Not after what he did to you. You need to get out there and have fun and date. Besides, I’m starting my hunt for my summer boyfriend tonight so you can finally be my wing girl,” Ella scolds, shaking her head back and forth giving me attitude.

“You’re such a guy,” I say shaking my head back at her. Ella has a tendency to go through guys like I go through underwear. She finds someone new, dates them for a month or two, find something she can’t stand about them, and dumps him like a load of bricks. The weirdest part is she is so lovable she always ends up being friends with them afterward.

“Fine, I’ll go out. But, I’m not being your wing girl. You’re on your own. I’ll have a drink and dance some, but that’s it!” I relent even though there was no doubt that she was going to get me out if I wanted to or not.

“Yeah! We’ll have fun! You’ll see. We haven’t gone out in ages,” Ella exclaims.

After checking out with the principal and saying our goodbyes to our co workers, Ella and I walk out to our cars feeling the freedom that only summer vacation can bring.

“You’re going to come to my house to get ready, right?” Ella asks with a grin on her face.

“No. I’ll pick you up at 7:00. I have to feed Chase and let him out for a little while. The last time I kept him in his crate all night, he didn’t forgive me for days,” I answer as I finish packing my car.

“Bailey, your dog will be fine without you for a few more hours. I forbid you to get ready at your house,” she tells me as she packs her car. “You’ll show up in jeans, your ten year old Dr. Martens, that damn black tank top and your hair in a ponytail. If you’re going to get a man, you need to dress appropriately,” Ella scolds me.

“I met Dave in that exact outfit,” I pout.

“That’s exactly my point! You have twenty minutes to go home, let Chase out, and get to my house before I show up at your door with my bag of makeup,” Ella shouts as she closes her car door.

“Fine. I’ll see you soon.” I give in again knowing I’m not going to get out of it. I get into my car and turning on “Schools Out for Summer,” a ritual I started in high school, and drive home.

I pull up to my driveway and just sit in my car for a minute. This is the house that Dave and I built together. Actually, I did all the work on the house. Dave always said that he was too tired from work to help with the home improvements. Now, I have this big house all to myself. No husband, no kids, no one. Just me and Chase. I open Chase’s crate and he wags his tail happy to see me.

“Hi Baby. Did you miss me?” I ask as I lean down and rub his ears. “I had a really rough day, now Ella is making me go out. Can you believe it?” I say to Chase as I let him out into the backyard.

Great. I’m waiting for my dog to answer me back. Maybe I do need to go out a little more often.

I walk into the kitchen, make myself a chocolate milk, and start unwrapping Hershey Kisses at a rapid pace. I need a minute to unwind and just breathe. It seems like just yesterday Dave and I were in love and living a happy life. Well, then again, maybe it wasn’t always so happy. I’ve been remembering a lot more bad memories than good lately.

I came home during lunch because it was an in-service day and I had an hour and a half to eat instead of just a half hour. I also wanted to let Chase out because Dave said he had to work late. If I let Chase out now, I could get some things done in my classroom after the in-service instead of having to rush home. Dave’s car was in the driveway which was odd. He never came home for lunch. Chase was already in the backyard so I walked into the kitchen and opened the fridge to pull out last night’s leftovers. I heard Dave up in the bedroom so I headed up there to see if he wanted me to heat anything up for him. I should have realized what was going on when I hit the top step, but the reality just never crossed my mind. I walked up to the bedroom door that stood wide open. I was glued to the spot. Dave had his face between his secretary’s legs. I slammed the bedroom door shut left.

I shake the bad memory from my mind. I need to stop feeling sorry for myself. Tonight’s the night I turn my life back around and start having fun again. I cannot let Dave continue to control my life any more. I’ve been the good girl who had done all the right things my whole life. It’s my turn to have fun and do something for myself for one in my life. Tonight the new Bailey is born.

“Ella,” I shout into her house.

“In the bathroom,” she shouts back.

Of course you are. It takes Ella hours to get ready to go to the grocery store. I can’t imagine how long it’s going to take her to get ready to go out.

I walk back to Ella’s bathroom. She has her long brown hair curled and pinned back with a red flower clip. She has on her favorite LBD and red three inch high heels. She is just finishing her make-up when she turns to me with a huge smile.

Oh no!

“I picked out two outfits for you to choose from. Go pick one while I get ready to do your hair,” Ella says as she turns back to the mirror.

I drop my purse by the toilet. I’m going to need my hidden stash of Kisses when Ella starts messing with my hair. Walking down the hall, I’m scared to see what hussy outfits she chose for me. My work outfits consist of khaki pants, a baby t-shirt or polo, and ballet flats. On the weekends I live in yoga pants, flip flops, and tank tops. Jeans, if I must. The last time I dressed up was for my five-year anniversary dinner with Dave and all I did was trade in my baby t-shirt for a blouse. Ella knew this and went to the extreme opposite for tonight’s get ups.

Lying on the bed are my two choices. One is a skin tight, strapless pink sequin dress that would be a little, okay, very short even on me. On the floor under the dress are very high black heels. There are several reasons I wear ballet flats and flip flops, mostly because I am not the world’s most graceful person. I trip over the cracks in the tiles in my classroom on a daily basis. No heels for me. Thank you.

She is out of her mind.

The second, the one I’m going to pick, is a black pencil skirt, a beaded blue tank top, and a pair of low wedges. A much better footwear choice for Sir Trips-A-Lot, still not as good as my flip-flops but she’s not going to let me wear them. I’ll also be bringing flip flops in my purse, just in case. Looking down at the two outfits, I know that Ella only put the first one out so that I wouldn’t complain about the second choice.

I shed my work clothes, throwing them onto the bed. One thing I did have going for me was my underwear. It’s my one guilty pleasure. Tonight, I have on a baby blue lace demi bra and matching lace thong underwear. They must match. Always.

Once my relationship with Dave started going downhill, I started running in hopes that if I lost a little weight, he’d maybe be interested in sleeping with me again. Well, I lost a lot of weight and started wearing thongs again just for him, something I haven’t done since high school. Unfortunately, it did nothing for our love life. It had been a long time since Dave and I made love, and then the divorce papers showed up at the breakfast table.

I start to get dressed when Ella walks into the room.

“Damn girl, you look hot! Maybe I should start running with you,” Ella laughs, swatting my bare butt as she walks by me.

This is funny for two reasons. Ella never got her butt out of bed before she absolutely had to. My 5 am running time is out of the question. Second, Ella’s only idea of exercise is having sex with her current boy toy. She has never run a mile in her life.

After I get dressed, Ella drags me into the bathroom and plops me onto the closed toilet lid. She starts right in by yanking on my long blond hair and curling it. No matter how I try to style my hair, it never turns out like I plan so, I gave up trying a long time ago. I either wear it in a low ponytail or a messy bun.

I start unwrapping more kisses and pop one in my mouth before Ella starts smearing makeup on my face.

“You should wear makeup more often, Bay,” Ella says.

“I do wear makeup,” I answer with a frown.

“Mascara and chap stick do not count as makeup,” Ella says. “You have flawless skin and the bluest eyes I’ve ever seen. If you just wear a little eye shadow, your eyes would really pop. I’ve wanted to give you a makeover for years. This is the perfect excuse.”

I’ve never been a big makeup girl. It really started in high school. My mom was always too busy to teach me how to put it on so I never really learned. And Ella is right, My morning routine is mascara and chap stick. I don’t want to spend the time putting makeup on every morning. I start to wonder if I should have made the effort for Dave. Was I too plain for him?

“Do you think if I would’ve dressed up more and worn make up, Dave would’ve stayed?” I ask looking up at Ella as she finishes my makeup.

“Honey, Dave is an ass. He always was. I’ve never thought he was good enough for you. I’m telling you, Dave leaving is the best thing that has ever happen to you. Now, you need to stop thinking about that asshat and look at yourself in the mirror,” she says as she steps back.

I stand up and step up to the mirror. I am speechless. I don’t recognize the woman looking back at me. My hair is falling down in soft waves around my face. My eyes pop just like Ella told me they would. They look even more blue than usual if that is even possible. I didn’t even look this amazing on my wedding day. My eyes start tearing up.

“Bailey, stop! You’re going to ruin my masterpiece. Now, grab your purse and let’s go find us some hotties to celebrate your Re-bachelorette party,” Ella says as she grabs my hand and steers me toward the door.

We pull up in front of Skye Bar and Grill and I turn to look at Ella.

“This is where we are going tonight? I got dressed up to go to Skye’s? We come here all the time,” I question. I actually had myself excited to go out and have fun.

“Bailey, when is the last time you had a drink?” Ella asks as she gathers her purse, keys, and iPhone.

I follow behind her as she gets out of the car. She knows the last time I got drunk was when Dave served me with divorce papers. I had three Long Island Iced Teas on an empty stomach. It was not a pretty sight. About half way through my second drink, my mood changed from devastated to happy rather quickly. There is a good reason I don’t drink often. When I get drunk, I become a crazy flirt. I think it has something to do with my inner sexy woman trying to get out but I still embarrass myself every time. The night in question, I ended up on a table singing a very bad rendition of “Bennie and the Jets.” Yeah, I thought I was Katherine Heigle in
27 Dresses
. I ended the night in the lap of some guy while he tried to cop a feel. After that night, it’s no wonder why Ella wants to feed me first.

“When we came out a few months ago,” I answer sheepishly.

“Exactly. You need a full stomach before you drink anything stronger than a beer.”