Nerd Haiku (4 page)
Authors: Robb Pearlman
Rage and confusion.
The world is turned upside down.
Hugo Award snub.
The birds are singing
on this great Alderaan day!
Hey, what's that in theâ
Only member of
the Alderaan Optimists
Society.
Sigh.
Like a Romulan
cloaking device covering
my soul, I am shy.
Pocket protector,
you keep my chest safe and warm,
yet my heart grows cold.
I sit on sidelines,
but unlike the quarterback
I rock at
Madden.
I'm not myopic,
and I play football . . . somewhere
in the Multiverse.
You prefer games of
strength and agility. I
prefer
Game of Thrones.
I'm well prepared for
a zombie apocalypse.
Are you, pretty boy?
Tell Ryan Seacrest
January 1st now starts
The New 52.
1, 2, tap-tap-tap.
I'm obsessive compulsive.
1, 2, tap-tap-tap.
5 7 5 hard.
Structure too strict for art form.
Hulk no like haiku.
Teach the children well:
4, 5, 6, 1, 2, 3 is
the way to watch them.
Star Trek
movie rule:
The reboot notwithstanding,
evens are better.
Your fingers are too
fat for small touch screens. Meek shall
inherit the earth.
Feel bad for Pluto.
His master's a mouse, and now
he's not a planet.
2001 was
more Kubrick's
The Shining
than
a space odyssey.
Speech Therapist! To
Dagobah must you come. Bad
syntax do I have.
Red Dead Redemption
and two piece and a biscuit.
Big Saturday night.
“Captain's Log, stardate . . . ” |
totally sounds better than |
“Dear Diary,” right? |
Must keep my nerd cred.
I've never played D&D.
Don't say
anything.
Blue, round, and fast, you're |
a credit to your species, |
Sonic the Hedgehog. |
Allergic to hay,
but Farmville lets me claim that
I am outdoorsy.
My fear of Mott's stems,
over the rainbow, from those
apple trees in Oz.
It's lonely, but it's
better to be feared than loved.
My
World of Warcraft.
Game Stop offered me
a job because I know more
than the current staff.
Workspace was perfect |
until you messed it all up, |
you damn dirty ape. |