Authors: ARUN GUPTA
Western computers troubleshooting Website
User Manual and Project Details
Developed by Connexions, Delhi
Shyam Mehra and Varun Malhotra
(Sam Mason and Victor Mell)
‘Do you have a soft copy that you can email me/’ Bakshi said. ‘Boston
wants it urgently.’
‘Yes sir,’ Vroom said, pointing to his computers, ‘I have it stored here.
I’ll send it to you.’
‘Also, did you dot eh collation, Sam?’
‘Yes sir,’ I said and passed him the ten sets.
‘Excellent. I empowered you, and you delivered the output. Actually, I
have another document, the board meeting invite. Can you help?’
‘What do I have to do?’ I said.
‘Here is a copy,’ Bakshi said and gave me a five-page document. ‘I
didn’t print more this time. Can you Xerox ten copies for me please? My
secretary is off today.’
‘Err. Sure Sir, just Xeroxing right?’
Bakshi nodded.
‘Sir,’ Vroom said, ‘what is the board meeting for?’
‘Nothing, just routine management issues,’ Bakshi said.
‘Are people going to get fired?’ Vroom asked, his direct question making
everyone spring to attention.
‘Err… ‘Bakshi said, at his usual loss for words when asked something
meaningful.
‘There are rumors in the Western Computers main bay. We just want to
know it we will be fine,’ Vroom said.
‘Western Appliances won’t be affected, right/’ Esha said.
Bakshi took a deep breath and said, ‘I can’t say much. All I can say is we
are under pressure to right size ourselves.’
‘Right size?’ Radhika asked in genuine confusion.
‘That means people are getting fired, right?’ Vroom said. Right size
never meant otherwise.
Bakshi did not respond.
‘Sir, we need to increase our sales force to get new clients. Firing
people is not the answer,’ Vroom said, with a boldness that was high even by
his standards.
Bakshi had a smirk on his face as he turned to Vroom. He put his hand
on Vroom’s shoulder. ‘I like your excitement Mr Victor,’ he said, ‘but a
seasoned management has to study all underlying variable and come up with
an optimal solution. It is not so simple.’
‘But sir, we can get more…’ Vroom was saying as Bakshi patted his
shoulder twice and left.
Vroom waited to ensure that Bakshi was out of the room before he
spoke again.
‘this is insanity. Bakshi’s fucked up the place and they are firing
innocent agents he said, his voice at shouting levels.
‘Stay clam,’ I said, and started assembling the sheets.
‘Yes stay calm. Like Mr Xerox Boy here—finds acceptance in everything,’
Priyanka said.
‘Excuse me,’ I said looking up. ‘Are you talking about me?’
Priyanka kept quiet. I felt agitated inside and just had to respond.
‘What is your problem? I come here, make fifteen grand a month and go
home. It shucks that people are being fired, and I am trying to do my best to
save my job. Overall, yes I accept my situation. And Vroom, before I forget,
can you email Bakshi the user manual please?’
‘I’m doing it, Vroom said, as he clicked his mouse, ‘though what is
happening here is still wrong.’
‘Don’t worry. We’ve done the website. We should be safe,’ I said.
‘You have pizza that often?’ Esha said.
‘Isn’t it unhealthy?’ Radhika asked. Despite the SMS argument, she was
back to knitting her scarf. Knitting habits die hard I guess.
‘No way. Pizzas are the ultimate balanced diet. Look at the contents:
grain in the curst, milk protein in the cheese, vegetables and meat as
toppings. It has all the food groups. I read it on the Internet—pizza is good for
you.’
‘You and your Net,’ Esha said. It was true. Vroom got all his information
off the internet—bikes, jobs, politics,, dating tips and, as I had just learnt,
pizza nutrition as well.
‘Pizzas are not healthy. I gain weight so fast if I have a lot of it,’
Priyanka said, ‘especially with my lifestyle. I hardly get time to exercise. On
top of that, I jut sit and work in a confined space.’
‘Priyanka’s last two words made my heart skip a beat. ‘Confined space’
means only one thing to me—that night at the 32nd Milestone disco.
#12
My Past Dates with
Priyanka—III
32nd Miltestone, Gurgaon Highway
Seven months before this night
I should not really call this one a date, since this time it was a group
thing with Vroom and Esha joining us. I argued earlier with Priyanka about
going out with work people, but she told me I should be less anti-social.
Vroom picked 32nd milestone and the girls agreed because the disc had no
door-bitch. According to Priyanka, a door-bitch is the hostess who stands
outside the disco. She screens every girl walking in, and if your waist is more
than twenty-four inches, or if you were not wearing something right out of an
item number, the door-bitch will raise an eyebrow at you like you are a fifty-
year-old aunty.
‘Really? I never noticed those door girls before,’ I said as we took stools
at the bar.
‘It’s a girl to girl thing. They size you up, and unless you are drop dead
gorgeous, you get that mental smirk,’ Priyanka said.
‘So why should you care? You are gorgeous,’ I said. She smiled and
pinched my cheek.
‘Mental smirk? Girls and their coded communication. Anyway, drink
anyone?’ Vroom said.
‘Long Island Ice tea please,’ Esha said and I noticed how stunning she
looked with make-up. She wore a black fitted top and black pants. Her pants
were so tight, she would probably have to roll them down when removing
them.
‘Long Island? Want to get drunk quick or what?’ I said.
‘C’mon. I need to de-stress. I ran around like mad last month chasing
modeling agencies. Besides, I have to wash down last week’s one thousand
calls,’ Esha said.
‘That’s right. Twelve hundred calls for me,’ Vroom said. ‘Let’s all have
Long Islands.’
‘Vodka cran for me please,’ Priyanka said. She wore camel-colored
pants and a pistachio-green sequined kurti. I had given her the kurti as a gift
on her last birthday. She had just a hint of eyeliner and a gift on her last
birthday. I preferred it to Esha’s Asian Paints job.
‘Any luck with modeling assignments?’ I idly asked Esha.
‘Not much. I did meet talent agent. He said he would refer me to some
designers and fashion show producers. I need to be seen in those circles,’
Esha said as she pulled her top down to cover her navel.
Vroom went to the bartender to collect our drinks. I scanned the disc.
The place had two levels: a dance floor on the mezzanine and a lounge bar on
the first floor. A remixed version of
Dil Chahta Hai
played in the background.
As it was Saturday night, the disc had more than three hundred customers.
They were all rich, or at least had rich friends who could afford drinks at over
Rs 300 a cocktail. Our budget was a lavish thousand bucks each: a treat for
making it through the extremely busy summer period at the call center.
I noticed some stick-thin models on the dance floor. Their stomachs
were so flat, If they swallowed a pill you would probably see an outline of it
when it landed inside. Esha’s looks are similar, except she is a bit short.
‘Check it out. She is totally anorexic. I can bet on it,’ Priyanka said,
pointing to a pale-complexioned model on the dance floor. She wore a top
without any sleeves or neck or collar. I guess the girls call it ‘off-shoulder’.
Defying physics, it did not slip off, though most men waited patiently.
The pale-complexioned model turned, displaying a completely bare
back.
‘Wow, I wish I were that thin. But, oh my god, look at what she is
wearing,’ Esha said.
‘I can’t believe she is not wearing a bra, must be totally flat,’ Priyanka
said,
‘Girls’ I said.
‘Yes? Esha and Priyanka turned to me.
‘I’m bored. Can you choose more inclusive conversation topics,’ I
pleaded. I looked for Vroom, he had collected the drinks and was waving
manically at us for help.
‘I’ll go,’ Esha said and went over to Vroom.
Finally, to my relief, it was only Priyanka and I.
‘So,’ she said as she leaned forward to peck at my lips. ‘You’re feeling
left out with our girlie talk?’
‘Well, this was supposed to be a date. I forced myself to come with
them. I haven’t caught up with you in ages.’
‘I told you, Vroom asked me and I didn’t want to be anti-social,’
Priyanka said as she ruffled my hair. ‘But we’ll go out for a walk in a bit. I
want to be alone with you too, you know?’
‘Pleas, let’s go soon.’
‘Sure, but they’re here now,’ Priyanka said as Vroom and Esha arrived.
Vroom passed us our drinks. We said ‘cheers’, and tried to sound lively and
happy, as everyone in a disc always should.
‘Congrats on the website guys. I heard it’s good,’ Esha said as he took a
sip.
‘The website is cool,’ Vroom said. ‘The test customers love it. No more
dialing. And it’s so simple—just right for those spoon-feed-me Americans.’
‘So, promotion finally coming for Mr Shyam here,’; Priyanka said. I
noticed she had finished a third of her drink in just two sips.
‘Now Mr Shyam’s promotion is another story,’ Vroom said. ‘Maybe My
Shyam would like to tell it himself.’
‘Please man. Some other time,’ I said even as Priyanka looked at me
expectantly.
‘Okay, well Bakshi said he is talking to Boston to release headcount. But
it will take a while.’
‘Why can’t you just be firm with him?’ Priyanka said.
‘Like how? How can you be firm with your own boss?’ I said, my voice
loud with irritation.
‘Cool it guys,’ Vroom said. ‘It’s party night and—‘
A big noise interrupted our conversation. We noticed a commotion on
the dance floor as the DJ turned off the music.
‘What’s up?’ Vroom said and we all went towards the dance floor.
A fight had broken out on the floor. A gang of drunken friends had
thought someone had pawed one of the girls with them. They accused that
someone else and grabbed his collar. Soon, Mr Accused’s own gang came to
his defense. As the dance floor was too noisy for vocal arguments, people
expressed themselves only with fists and kicks. The music stopped when
someone knocked one guy flat on the floor. Several others were on top of
each other. Bouncers finally disentangled everyone and restored peace. A
stretcher emerged to carry away the knocked-out guy.
‘Man, I wish it had gone on a bit longer,’ Vroom said.
It’s true. The only thing better than watching beautiful people in a disc
is watching a fight. A fight means the party is totally rocking.
Five minutes later the music was back and occupying the floor again was
the anorexic girl’s brigade.
‘That is what happens to kids with rich dads and too much money,’
Vroom said.
‘C’mon Vroom. I thought you said money is good. That is how we’ll beat
the Americans, right?’ Priyanka said with the confidence that comes after
drinking a Long Island Iced Tea in seven minutes.
‘Yes, doesn’t money pay for your mobile phones, pizzas and discos?’ I
asked.
‘Yes, but the difference is that I’ve earned it. These rich kids, they have
no clue how hard it is to make cash,’ Vroom said and held up his glass. ‘This
drink is three hundred bucks—it takes me almost a full night of two hundred
irritating Americans screaming into my ear to earn it. Then I get this drink.
Which is full of ice-cubes anyway. These kids can’t make that comparison.’
‘Oh, I feel so guilty drinking this now, Priyanka said.