Only the Strongest Survive (32 page)

Emely was indignant. “How can you even think
that? I was so worried that I just couldn’t stay in that hole any
longer.” She could only hope that he would believe this lie.

“
And what if
Ronald had come with his wife and left her here, while he went into
town?”

“
I didn’t
think of that. I thought—”

“
Damn it,
Emely! You must never ever leave your room. I deliberately didn’t
lock you in, but it was a bad idea. You’ve got to stay in there, as
quiet as a mouse, do you understand?”

“
But John
….”

“That’s how it is, there’s no other way.”

She could feel the pressure of tears in her
eyes and found it difficult to keep them back. “There is one other
way,” she said, her voice trembling.

“No, there isn’t.”

The stinging
feeling in her eyes was too strong and big tears began sliding down
her cheeks. “Didn’t you say you’d let me go one day?”

When he saw
her unresisting body and sparkly tears that adorned her face like
the most precious diamonds, he couldn’t help himself. He got up and
embraced her. Kissing her hair, he said, “I’ll let you go, Emely,
I’ll let you go very soon.”

Slowly she
lifted her head and looked into his eyes. She couldn’t believe what
he had just said. He sounded so sincere.

“Will you really let me go?” She gently took
his face in her hands.

“Yes, I promise.”

She kissed
him on the cheek, pressed herself closer to him, and went on
crying. She knew he was thinking about it. She sensed he would
never say something he didn’t mean.

*

In the evening they were both in a much
better mood. John cooked them delicious lasagna and for dessert
there was hazelnut cake.

“The meal was wonderful,” Emely said. “I must
have gained a few pounds during these past few months since I’ve
been your guest,” she joked.

“Your figure is still perfect,” he said while
pouring her some more Dom Perignon.

“Kitty is getting very impatient. Could we
take our glasses outside?”

He nodded and carried the glasses in his left
hand and took the bottle in his right. They sat on the bamboo
chairs on the terrace in front of the house, enjoying the evening
air filled with the scents of the forest.

“It always smells so nice here,” Emely
said.

“Of course, we’re living in paradise.”

Even though
she was his prisoner and should hate this place, deep down she
didn’t. On the contrary, she liked it. She liked all those trees
and bushes around the house. Maybe it was because she spent most of
the day in that stuffy little room.

Every time
she left the house she felt a jolt of energy. She tried to inhale
deeply while looking at the various plants growing all around. The
grass was decorated with white and purple flowers. The wall
surrounding the house was barely visible, it was so overgrown by
ivy. Everything was wild, and Emely liked it that way.

If he really releases me, I’ll buy myself a
house like this somewhere in the middle of the woods.

They clinked
their
twisted-stemmed glasses, laughing.
Meanwhile, Kitty kept sticking her nose in various holes and
wagging her tail.

A short
silence occurred in their conversation and Emely really wanted to
ask him once more if he truly meant what he had said earlier.
Instead, she said, “The price of those Ford shares we bought a week
ago rose by 7 percent.”

“Super.”

She noticed
he was
preoccupied even though he had
been trying to look as if he was in a good mood. She knew him well
enough to be aware of the fact that he was thinking about
something, but she didn’t know what.
Maybe he really will let me go.

When the bottle was empty, John went to get
another. As if incredibly thirsty, they quickly picked up the newly
filled glasses and took a long sip. A few bubbles went up John’s
nose and he had to sneeze. They laughed so much that their voices
carried far away.

When it was just after midnight, Emely got
up, indicating that it was time to go to bed.

John took her hand. “Let’s have another
glass, to empty the bottle.”

“Which bottle?” she joked.

“The second one, I think.”

“
OK,
then.”

She sat down,
her head spinning slightly. In the hope of sobering up a bit, she
took a few deep breaths. While doing this, she leaned toward him
and she caught a whiff of his cologne.

“Mmmm,” she said, “you smell nice.”

“
I’m glad you
like it,” he said warmly, and smiled.

She
straightened up and became serious again.
What am I doing? He’ll think I’m seducing him.
She arranged her hair with her hand. “It’s best
if we go to bed,” she said coldly, looking into the
distance.

She emptied
her glass
quickly and got up. “That’s it,
it’s empty.”

John got up too, and followed her while she
swayed inside. Then he locked up, making sure that Kitty had come
in.

As they were
walking downstairs, Emely felt John watching her. She had a feeling
that he would touch her at any moment. That was what she feared
most. She was still embarrassed about what had happened the night
before and was determined to resist with all her might if he tried
something again.

When they
reached the bottom of the stairs, Emely was embraced by the cold,
musty air. Every time she went toward her room, this smell
irritated her nostrils. She hated damp and moldy buildings. She
thought of the wretched people who ha
d to
live in city sewers, sharing their space with rats, while sewage
traveled past them.
Terrible,
she thought.

Suddenly she felt a hand on her shoulder.
“No!” she hissed as if she had spotted Kitty peeing on the
carpet.

John pulled her closer and began kissing her
neck. His left hand skillfully reached under her top.

“No, John,” she said again.

He was
holding her so tight that it seemed pointless to resist. Her only
weapon was a cold, strict voice, so she repeated, “John, don’t you
understand when I tell you to stop this immediately.” However, her
voice was much less decisive than earlier.

“Yes, I understand,” he said in a
whisper.

When she felt his hand on her stomach and his
hot tongue twirling around her right ear, something began happening
to her. She felt herself relaxing and submitting to his
embrace.

“No, John, let me go immediately,” she said,
but only a second later the first sigh could be heard from her
mouth.

Waves of lust
engulfed her. Only a few moments earlier she could not have
imagined doing it again with him, she was convinced of
this
—she only rarely changed her
decisions. But what she was feeling now was much stronger than her
mind. She knew she should not be doing this, but at the same time
volcanoes were bubbling up inside her, threatening to explode. And
John was the only one who could put these fires out and return her
body to normal functioning.

Why can’t I resist him
?
she asked herself, but
immediately desired him so much that as soon as she could she
turned around to kiss those wonderful lips. The touch of his tongue
made her tingle from head to toe. She submitted to the strong,
skillful hands that caressed her while opening the buttons on her
shirt and undoing her pants. There was a danger that her clothes
would drop to the floor and she would appear in front of him
completely naked. He would be able to do with her whatever he
wanted. There would be no way back.
I have to stop him, I have to interrupt this
curse.

But instead
of pushing him away, she backed toward the bed. John immediately
understood, lifted her in his arms
, and
carried her over like a child. She was naked in his hands, her body
trembling with fear and desire.

“John, this is not a smart decision. Let me
go, we mustn’t do this.”

He put her on
the bed and placed his lips to her breasts, sucking them. At the
same time her removed his T-shirt with one swoop and revealed his
muscular body.

Emely could
last no longer. She turned him over and started kissing him on the
face, neck, and chest. She marveled at his firm body. Like a snake
she wriggled on top of him, pinning him down with her quick, hot
tongue. The more he sighed, the more intent she became. This moment
was hers and she could do what she wanted.

Her
hands
moved along his abdominal muscles
that were clearly separated. She directed her lips toward his
navel, caressing his chest. Just as she was about to undo his pants
and release him from the tight jeans, he flipped her over again.
She was slightly angry at him for not letting her completely
undress him, but soon relinquished her body to his masterful hands
and gentle lips. They played like this until they were both
exhausted and lay on their backs.

He
really is special,
Emely thought just
before her strength left her completely.

John embraced
her gently. He was unable to go to sleep for a long
time
—he wanted to be with her and feel
her soft skin next to his body.

*

In the
morning, Emely woke up first. She slipped out of his embrace and
moved to her side of the bed. John woke up too and looked at her
lovingly, wanting to greet her with a kiss. He
leaned over, but she swiftly moved her head and looked away
with her lips pressed close together. John spent some time looking
at her and then stroked her shoulders, but she would not budge and
continued staring at the wall, tensing her muscles in
anger.

He understood
her silent game and got up without a word,
dressed
, and left the room. Emely could
hear the key turn in the lock—he did not forgot this time. She felt
terrible, regretted everything they had done, and swore this really
was the last time. She didn’t want to have a love affair with
someone whom she hated. She asked herself,
Where is all this leading?

When an hour
and a half later he came back,
carrying a
tray with fresh rolls and coffee, Emely wasted no time.

“
John,
” she said, “we really must
talk.”

“
I don’t have
the time,” he said, and picked up Kitty. “I have things to do at
home. I’ll be back late in the afternoon and I’m taking Kitty with
me.”

“
But
John—”

“We’ll talk at dinner,” he said, already
running up the stairs.

He came back
in a few minutes with some
ham and cheese
sandwiches. Finally, he put a plastic bottle of water on her table.
“Bye!” he said quickly and then he was gone.

“
But
….”

*

Emely kept
repeating in her mind the speech she intended to give in the
evening when he came back.
I’ll tell him in no uncertain terms that I don’t love him
and therefore don’t want to have sex with him.

Impatiently
she moved to the other end of the room with her hands on her
hips.
If he really loves me,
he’ll understand and leave me alone.

She sat on a
chair and tried to direct her attention to the numbers on the
computer screen.
How dare he
mislead me and even climb into my bed? I should be more
decisive.
She was clenching her teeth in
anger.
Damn it, he always
attacks at just the right moment.

She got up
and paced the room.
And he’s
nothing special in bed anyway.
She bit
her bottom lip, knowing this was not true and that she had to
extinguish the arousal brought on by thoughts of their last
meeting.

She looked at
the clock.
When will he
come?
It was nearly two, but it felt like
it was at least seven in the evening. The time was dragging
on.

Once more she
looked at the screen and stared at it for a while. Then she turned
the computer off.
I’m going to
go crazy in this hole.
At the thought
that she was losing it, Emely considered,
It’s not that bad. I must think of all the prisoners
who spend their whole life locked up. If they can stand it, so can
I. If I think like this, it’ll be easier for me.
She sat on the bed with her legs crossed in front of her,
with the intention of meditating. She straightened up and took a
few deep breaths in order to calm down.
It’s easier for prisoners. They know they can’t escape
and become resigned to their fate, but I have false
hopes.

She put both
her hands on her knees and slowly closed her eyes. She began
relaxing her neck by moving her head forward, then to the left and
the right and back again for a minute.
She tried to focus on her mind in an attempt to empty it of
thoughts.
Why didn’t I die in
that grave? Then I wouldn’t have to endure all this.

Her body was
slowly relaxing, but she could still feel tension in her stomach.
She tried to imagine lying on a beach, waves lapping in front of
her. This was supposed to wash away all those pesky thoughts,
but
it didn’t work. She couldn’t imagine
the sea in that basement room.
I hate him. How dare he come to my room at night? How dare
he touch me like that?