Authors: Kelly Hashway
Logan shoots her an annoyed look. “I was trying to help her do just that when you interrupted us.”
“Whoa, down boy,” Rachel said, raising her hands. “So she’s not willing to jump into bed with you again yet. Get over it. And don’t you dare push her, because I
will
come after you.”
“He wouldn’t do that,” I say, although I have no idea how I know that.
Logan brushes his hand against mine. “No, I wouldn’t. You remembered that.”
Did I? Or am I basing my judgment on what I know about Logan now? “I can see how much you care about me. Rachel’s right, though. Pushing me to remember isn’t the answer.”
Logan’s face falls. “You think I’m pushing you?”
“Dude, I swear I’ll rip your balls off if—”
“Stop.” I hold my hand up to Rachel. “Please, Rach. I need to talk to Logan alone.”
“Fine, but call me later and let me know if I need to hurt him. I’ll do some hand strengthening exercises in the meantime, just in case.” She winks at me and then glares at Logan before walking away.
“I used to like her,” Logan says. “I mean as one of your friends,” he quickly adds.
“She’s only looking out for me.”
“I know, but I’m so tired of everyone in this town thinking I’m the bad guy. I’ve never done anything to hurt you, Cara, and that’s not going to change.”
I know I should tell him the truth, tell him he has to stay away from me for both our sake, that I was wrong about us being friends. But the look in his eyes melts my heart.
Damn it. I might fall for him all over again.
Logan
I know I’m getting to her, but it’s happening too slowly for my liking. The urge to kiss her is overwhelming. Maybe Rachel
should
rip my balls off. It might help me keep my mind on something other than the taste of Cara’s lips.
“Walk me home?” Cara asks.
I nod, and as much as I want to take her hand in mine, I let my arms fall at my sides. Being the good guy is so damn hard. When we get to Cara’s house she leads me to the kitchen and motions for me to sit down at the center island. My eyes trail in the direction of the stairs. I want to take her to her room and lose myself in her. If Mom is looking down on me right now, she must be so proud that I’m keeping my hands to myself. Of course, suppressing my urges is damn near killing me inside.
“Hungry?” Cara asks.
Yes, but not for food.
“I’m good.”
She takes two bottles of water from the fridge and places one in front of me, then sits on the stool opposite me.
“Water? What happened to steaming hot tea?”
“I’m feeling a little hotter than usual today.”
I lean toward her. “Remember how we cooled off in my pool?”
She shakes her head and starts picking at the label on her water bottle.
“We were at my house, sitting by the pool, and I brought you an iced tea. We kissed and the next thing I knew, you pulled me into the pool. Now that was hot.”
She blushes and takes a sip of water. “Was I always so…forward?”
“No, but I remember you were really hot to the touch. I think you tried to find ways to cool yourself down so I wouldn’t figure out what you are. Not that I would’ve ever guessed. Not even after you stuck your hands in the bonfire at Nick’s house.”
She shakes her head, clearly unhappy about not remembering any of this. I reach for her hand, which is unbearably hot, and she quickly pulls away.
“Don’t. I might hurt you. I can’t control this right now.”
“I don’t care. You’ve burned me before.”
“What?” Her eyes widen.
“Only once and it wasn’t bad. Relax.” I reach for her again, but she’s not having it. God, I can’t take this anymore. I stand up and walk around the island to her.
“What are you doing?” she asks, her voice full of alarm.
“What I should’ve done right from the start.” Before she can protest, I wrap one arm around her waist and pull her to her feet. Our faces are mere inches apart, and I can feel her heart pounding against my chest. “Tell me you don’t want me to kiss you. Say the words and I’ll stop.”
She looks into my eyes, but doesn’t speak. I lean forward, breathing in her scent. “Last chance, Cara.”
“The Hunters know about me,” she blurts out just before my lips touch hers. “You need to leave, Logan.”
I let go of her, and she’s out of my arms immediately. I turn around, not wanting her to see the hurt on my face. Why does this keep happening? I refuse to believe this is the way it’s supposed to be. “If you really want me to leave, I will.”
“That’s not what I meant.”
I face her again. “What?”
“If the Hunters know about me, then they must know about you, if we were really as close as you say we were.”
“I’m not leaving you to deal with this on your own. I don’t care if there are a hundred Hunters after me. I’m staying.”
She bites her lower lip, and a tear trickles down her cheek.
“Please don’t cry.” I reach up to brush the tear away, but it turns to smoke before I can.
“I don’t doubt your feelings for me. That’s why I’m telling you to go. Leave Ashlan Falls. It’s the only way to keep you safe.”
“So you’re worried for me?”
She nods. “I can’t be the reason you end up…” She chokes on more tears, but they’re coming out as nothing more than smoke.
“With a dagger in my chest?”
Her chest rises but doesn’t fall. She’s holding her breath. To hell with it. I pull her into my arms and hold her tight. She doesn’t resist me, just cries on my shoulder. She might not want to admit it, but she has strong feelings for me. She’s every bit as attracted to me now as she was before. And she’s afraid of losing me. I hug her tighter and stroke her strawberry blonde hair. I swear her red streaks get redder with my touch.
She pulls her head back and looks into my eyes. “I wish I could remember you. I really do.”
Her words hurt because I’ve been convinced she
is
remembering me, at least on some level, but she doesn’t think so.
“It’s okay,” I lie. “I’m not going anywhere. I’ll stay with you until you do remember, and then you’re going to be stuck with me for good.”
My words only make her cry more.
***
When I finally have Cara calmed down and manage to get her to eat something, Jeremy comes home.
“Where’s Linette?” Cara asks him, dropping her spoon into her bowl of cereal.
“She ran home for a minute. She said she needed to get some things.”
“Is she really staying with you?” Cara asks me.
“She’s sleeping in the guest room. Dad doesn’t have a clue. He leaves early in the morning and gets in late at night.”
“And you don’t think he’ll ever figure out you have a live-in housekeeper?”
“He’d have to pay attention to me in order to figure that out. Dad tunes out the second he walks through the front door.”
Cara looks at me sadly. “I’m sorry.”
“I’m not.” I don’t want to talk about it anymore, so I ask Jeremy, “How was Monique’s? Any good specials today?”
Jeremy rubs his stomach and grins. “Tuna BLT wrap. It was so awesome I had two.”
“What are your plans for the rest of the day?” Cara asks, taking her bowl to the sink.
“There’s a meeting this evening, so I’ll be trying to relearn the guitar until then.”
Cara tenses at the mention of the meeting. Apparently, I’m not the only one who’s sick of the damn things.
Jeremy walks by us. “Later.” Before he disappears down the stairs to his room, he glances at me briefly and then addresses Cara. “Let me know if you need me.”
Dick.
If I don’t end up hating everyone in this town besides Cara, it will be a miracle.
Cara returns to the center island. “I guess you’re stuck with me for a little longer.”
“Nowhere I’d rather be stuck.” I flash her a smile.
“Do you flirt with all your friends?”
There’s a definite flirty tone in her voice, which only makes me try harder.
“Only the ones I find irresistible.”
Her face falls, and she pushes back from the island. “I’m sorry. I don’t know why I did that. I shouldn’t have.”
I get up and walk toward her. “You did it because that’s the way we are together. I know your family and friends think it’s the imprint doing this, but they’re wrong. We have chemistry, Cara.”
“I know.” She looks down at the floor, and I gently tilt her chin back up and look into her eyes.
“Why do you say it like it’s a bad thing?”
“That chemistry is what’s putting us both at risk. Let’s say things work out for us.”
I smile. “I like the sound of that.”
“We stay together.”
I step closer to her, one of my legs positioned between hers. “Liking this even more.”
“We can’t grow old together. I won’t age like you will.”
I didn’t think about that. What hot young Phoenix wants to jump in bed with a grandpa?
“Oh.”
“What’s worse is I’ll have three more lives,
if
this all ends well with the Hunters, that is.”
“I won’t let them hurt you.”
“You won’t be alive to protect me. Not in my next life or the one after that or the one after that. That’s the reality of our situation, Logan.”
But I’ll get her for
my
whole life, and I can live with that.
“Won’t you be, like, wickedly powerful by then? You’ll have total control over your abilities, and aren’t older Phoenixes less of a target? Isn’t that what Garret said?”
“Yes, but something else will weaken me and make me an easy target.”
“What?”
“This imprint. The way I feel about you. If I remember you now, it means I’ll remember you then. I’ll love you well after you’re gone, and I’ll be miserable because of it. Just like my mom.”
She mentioned that at the falls, but I forgot. No wonder she doesn’t want to chance remembering me or what we had. What’s a few moments of amazing make-out sessions, sex even, if it means hundreds of years of heartache, one that might lead a Hunter right to her? I step back, not wanting that for her. If one of us has to hurt, I don’t want it to be her.
“I should go,” I say, even though each word feels like a punch to my gut.
“You can’t.” For a moment I’m hopeful that she’s saying to hell with the future, that she wants to be with me, but she says, “Linette isn’t here yet.”
“Right.” I nod, feeling like someone kicked me in the balls.
“Want to watch a movie or something?”
What I want is for things to go back to the way they were, before I knew Phoenixes existed, before there were all these rules and it was only Cara and me. “Sure.”
Cara walks into the living room and turns on the TV. “I have one in from the other night. I wanted to watch it but was too tired and fell asleep.”
“As long as it’s not a romance, that’s fine.” I can’t handle watching other people in love when the girl I need more than air is out of my reach.
“It’s an action adventure. Jeremy said it was pretty good.”
I flop down on the couch, putting my feet up on the coffee table. Cara presses play and sits next to me. The space between us may as well be the Grand Canyon. While I try to focus on the movie and not my broken heart, I catch Cara staring at me.
“What?” I meet her eyes, and she blushes.
“Can I…I thought…I’m sorry. It’s just that my mind and body are at odds right now. I know I should stay away from you, but…” She looks at the space between us.
I slide closer to her. “Better?”
“Almost.” She leans her head on my shoulder. “Is this okay?”
“Yeah, it’s fine.”
She tilts her head up to look at me, and my eyes immediately go to her lips.
“I’m pushing it, aren’t I?” she asks, starting to pull away.
I put my arm around her and hold her against me. “This is more comfortable. You okay with that?”
She leans her head against me again. I spend the movie breathing in her cinnamon scent. At one point, I twirl a red lock of hair around my finger. Cara either doesn’t notice or doesn’t mind, and I pretend, for now, that we’re us again. That I’m holding my girlfriend in my arms and that when the movie ends, we’ll make our own romance.
“Cara!” Jeremy races into the room, and Cara jerks out from under my arm.
I squeeze my hand into a fist and turn to face Jeremy. “What the hell, man?”
He looks back and forth between Cara and me for moment. “What were you—?” He shakes his head. “There’s no time. It’s Linette.”
Cara jumps up, worry all over her face. “What about her?”
“She’s at the hospital with Mom.”
“Jer, what happened?” Cara asks.
Then the panic on Jeremy’s face registers with me. Linette isn’t there visiting. She’s a patient.
“She was attacked. By Hunters.”