Authors: Elizabeth Seckman
Jenna sighed and rolled over. She would never allow that happen. She knew what was best for her son. Correction, their son. Jenna felt the last vestige of sleep slip away and the tension return. She couldn’t make solo decisions anymore. At least not until Tres returned to Raleigh.
The realization of that fact did nothing to cheer her up. She didn’t want Tres to leave. The thought of it left her hollow. And when Tres did go, how would he see Tanner? Would she have to let Tanner travel there by himself? Would she have to divide her son’s time at Christmas like countless unmarried parents?
She sat up in bed and leaned back into the headboard with a thud. She rubbed her swollen eyes and willed herself not to spend another day in tears. But she couldn’t stop the sting thinking of the coming changes. Her life had always been just her and Tanner. He was all she had and now she had to share him. And what if she and Tres never worked things out and he married someone else? Tanner would have a step mom. And Tres would have a new love. And she’d have to be a first hand witness to it.
Brushing away a single hot tear, she decided she would have to do something. Maybe she could fight for him? Make him want to stay with her? But she had never been a flirt, had never intentionally tried to attract a man. How did she even begin? For once she longed to have some of her mother’s genes. Her mother knew how to be enchanting; her allure was like a disease few men were immune from. Maybe she could try….
No, Jenna chastised herself. She was nothing like her mother and would never play games. Tres either loved her or he didn’t. And he did say he loved her on Saturday, and when they made love, it was far beyond physical—it was spiritual. That had to mean something, she assured herself, even if he did turn on her with every bit of venom right afterward. Venom she knew she deserved.
She thought back to yesterday and bit her lip. He seemed pleased to see her, but he didn’t treat her like a lover. He didn’t grab her and greet her with a hug or a kiss. But he was kind, and he asked her to be friends. She closed her eyes and pictured his face hoping to recall some spark to keep her hopes alive, but she remembered nothing. Sadly, she was certain the longing his eyes once held for her was absent. His desire for her had cooled. Her eyes filled with tears. Hadn’t she begged him to forgive her and didn’t he walk away? Irritated by the tears, she shook them off. She took a deep breath and steadied her resolve.
She wouldn’t beg again. She would accept the friendship he offered and they would find an amicable way to raise their son. He’d probably marry her for Tanner’s sake, but that would be insane. And it would be beyond insult. No, she’d deal with it all and she would survive, as usual, as long as she didn’t have to deal with his pity. She could never bear him feeling sorry for her, maintaining a relationship with her because he felt obligated. She might come in last at the game of life repeatedly, but she always kept her pride. It was irrevocably hers, and though it was far from everything, it was something.
Jenna looked out the ruffle-laden window. The light was fading. It wasn’t dawn, it was evening. She gasped, shocked she had slept away an entire day. She jumped out of bed and hurried to the kitchen. Maureen was cleaning up. Seeing Jenna, she smiled, “Evening, dear. Saved you some dinner.”
“I slept all day? Why didn’t you wake me?”
“You needed the rest. Do you feel better?”
“I never felt bad,” Jenna snapped, annoyed with herself. “What about Tanner? Who got him off to school?”
“He dressed himself, ate some eggs I fried up, and Tres drove him to school.”
“Tres?”
“Yes, Tres.”
“I thought he’d go back to Raleigh, and I thought Tanner preferred to ride with Jimmy Durant?”
Maureen shrugged, “Seems he’s sticking around. Tanner seems to be pleased. I think having a man around is going to be good for him. Tres went down and watched his football practice and Tanner appeared right tickled to have someone to talk shop with.” Maureen pulled containers from the refrigerator preparing to make Jenna a plate. “Yes, I believe this will be good for the boy. Teenage years can be so troublesome. Why I wish Jake’s daddy would have been alive. Maybe Jake wouldn’t have had so many trials.” Maureen finished piling the leftover containers on the counter. She looked at Jenna and smiled, “This is such a blessing.”
Jenna crossed her arms over her chest and chewed on her lip, her mind brewed, but she simply said, “I’ll eat later, Maureen. I need to clean up. I’m thoroughly sick of this sweat suit. I plan to burn it after I take it off.”
Maureen laughed, “I’ll take it to the Goodwill for you.” She laughed again, “Gonna burn it.”
“If you want. I know I never want to see it again.”
“There’s a bag in the bathroom with your bath items and a suitcase with your clothes in the closet in the hall.”
“I’m shocked Linsie worked so fast. Must be a big demand to fill it so quick.”
“Mmm, hmm. You should get your first check on Friday.”
Jenna nodded and headed to the shower. She finished up and dressed in jeans and a coral colored tank top. She combed out her hair and twisted it into a sloppy bun at the nape of her neck. She looked herself over in the mirror. She looked as rough as she felt. She dug through her bag for her make-up. She dabbed on some foundation and swept the blush across her cheeks. She stepped back, shook her head, and sighed, “You are so pathetic. He probably won’t even be around.” Coming out of the bathroom, Jenna bumped into Tanner in the hall. He grabbed her and gave her a hug, lifting her off her feet. “Man, I thought I was a late sleeper.”
“You’re in a good mood.”
“I guess I am. Found out tonight I’m going to be moved to first string varsity quarterback. Not too shabby for a freshman, huh?”
“Not too shabby at all. Congratulations.”
“And Tres is fixing up the house and he gave me this check to give to you for his rent and….” Tanner reached into his pocket and pulled out a piece of paper.
“W
h
o
a
, what do you mean fixing the house and paying rent?”
“Tres is staying in our house, and he’s been fixing things up for you. Says he feels bad for all the suffering you must have had being a single mom and all.”
“Suffered? Good lord, I never suffered. You never suffered. This is ridiculous. Where is he?”
“He’s fixing the hole on the roof. He says you really need a new one, but patching it is a start.”
Jenna snatched the check from Tanner’s hand and stormed from the house.
Tanner ran to the kitchen yanking on Maureen’s arm as he tried to drag her to the door. “She’s going to blow, Nanny. She’s going to go out there and send Tres packing. I thought she knew he was staying in the house. You got to stop her.”
Maureen freed her arm and gestured Tanner to be calm. She pressed her finger to her lips. She opened the kitchen window a crack and pulled a chair over where she could watch Jenna in the yard. Tanner squatted beside her just as the front door slammed. Jenna stomped to her front door and knocked. She waited a second and then she heard the pounding of the hammer on her roof. She circled the porch until she had Tres in her line of vision.
“Get down here,” she ordered with her hands on her hips.
He gave her the one minute sign and pulled a nail from his lips and proceeded to pound it in. Jenna bent over and scooped up a handful of gravel and threw one rock after another at the roof. “Get off my roof, Tres Coulter. And get the hell out of my house.” The rocks hit the side of the house and ricocheted in all directions.
Tres sat back on his heels, “Just give me a minute.”
Tanner bounded from the house. Maureen made no move to stop him. The door banged again, then moments later Tanner confronted his mother, “What are you doing?”
“Me?” Jenna asked as she scooped up more gravel. “I’m getting Tres’s attention.” She threw more rocks, not a single one hitting her target. She took Tanner’s hand and placed the ammunition in his palm, “You’re a better aim. Hit him.”
Tanner threw the rocks on the ground, “What’s your problem?”
“My problem?”
“Yeah, your problem. He’s only trying to help.”
“I don’t need his help, dammit. And I don’t need his money. I don’t need anything from him.”
Tanner stared at his mom and shook his head, his eyes glassing with tears. “Don’t blow this. Mom, please.”
Jenna’s heart crashed and her limbs felt weak. Her son turned against her. He blamed her. As she searched for the right words, she was distracted by the sound of a lawn mower. She and Tanner turned toward the sound. Maureen pushed the mower across the front yard.
“Has your Nanny gone crazy?” Jenna asked Tanner. He shrugged and brushed away his tears. “I think you’ve both gone over the edge.”
Jenna walked over to Maureen and took the mower from her releasing the handle and shutting it down. “You can’t mow, Maureen, you’ll aggravate your hip.”
“I can do everything myself. I don’t need help with my yard. Gonna paint the tin on my roof tomorrow.”
“You’re being absurd, Maureen.”
“No, I just want you to respect me.”
“I respect you.”
“No, Jenna. You do everything for yourself. I want to too. I am beginning to see your point in all of this.”
“You’re making fun of me?” Jenna asked Maureen.
“No. I am trying to make a point. Why can you help me, but no one can help you?”
“This isn’t the same, Maureen.” Jenna rubbed her temples.
“Why not? You’d never accept people’s pity and their help. You must think I’m a real load.”
“Of course not, you know I love you.”
“Well, you’
d
love me more if I was more independent.”
“How’s it any different, Mom? You’ve had a bucket under that drip for three years because of that hole. Tres fixes it and you flip out? Why do you hate him so much? Why could you put up with dad drinking all the time and screwing everything that moved, but this guy’s the bad guy? I don’t get it. I don’t get you.”
Jenna’s eyes filled with tears. “I can’t deal with this right now. I need time to think.”
Jenna turned away from them all and took off down the road. Tanner started to follow, but Maureen pulled him back. She went to the house where Tres came down the ladder. “I’m going to give you first crack at our lovable little porcupine, but first I want to tell you some things Sam explained to me after service yesterday. Might make her stubbornness make a little more sense.”
Chapter
20
Tres didn’t want to listen to Maureen as Jenna’s blond head disappeared around the bend in the road. He didn’t want her left alone. What if she stepped in front of a car or walked into the ocean? He needed to catch up with her, not waste time getting lessons from Maureen. “I can’t let her leave like this, Maureen.” He barely made it past the driveway when his attention was drawn to Tanner’s voice, shrill and tight with tension. He stopped and turned his attention to his son.
“Forget about understanding her. I already told you, Nanny,” Tanner pointed out. “I told you she’d ruin everything. What’s wrong with her?”
“There’s nothing wrong with your mom, she just...” Maureen’s voice stayed steady, patient.
“She’s just pig headed.” Tanner concluded. “I think she likes to be miserable. She has no intention of ever being happy. But does she have to drag me down with her? Do I have to be miserable with her?”
“Oh, come now, Tanner. I think you’re being unfair.” Maureen’s voice was firm, but still lacked scolding.
“No, Nanny, I’m sick of it. She’s been broke her whole life. She’s been lonely her whole life. And why?”
Maureen sighed and shook her head.
Tres came back. He gave Tanner’s arm a squeeze. “I’m going to talk to her, Tanner. We’ll get this worked out.”
“No, you won’t. You’ll try– but she’ll get rid of you.”
“That’s not going to happen.”
“Oh, trust me, she prefers to be alone. She could have gotten remarried a long time ago, could have had any man on this island, but would she?”
“Can’t say I’m disappointed,” Tres said quietly.
Tanner turned away, “I didn’t mean...you just don’t know her anymore. She’s completely stuck on being alone. She doesn’t want you or anyone else. I used to feel sorry for her, but I’ve decided she likes to be unhappy. So, I say, we let her pout.”
“She wants to be happy,” Maureen argued. “She’s scared.”
“Ooh, guy comes along and offers to make her life easier and she flips out. That’s a freakin’ crisis!” Tanner spat.
“Smart girls don’t want to be damsels in towers. Maybe she just wants a man to love her, not rescue her.” The three in the yard turned to the new voice. Tres recognized it immediately.
“Mother,” Tres greeted her.
She closed the door to her Mercedes and approached Tres, kissing his cheek lightly. She introduced herself, “I’m Tres’s mother, Barbara Coulter.” She extended a hand to Maureen then turned to Tanner. Her eyes met his only a second before she looked away until she banished her sudden tears. He was her grandson, she knew in an instant. His resemblance struck such a fierce chord of remorse she had to take a deep breath to steady her nerve. He looked like Trip, her youngest son. The blond hair, the warm brown eyes. She never realized her three boys looked so much alike until that moment. Of course, Tres and Craig looked alike, but the blond hair on Trip was enough to prohibit more intense comparison. Later she would make it up to Tanner for her role in this mix up, but for now, she had to set her son on the right track. He’d not win Jenna by patronizing her.