Private Show (The Private Series) (32 page)

The Neptune is full of glamorous gowns and tuxedos. And masks galore. I head for the backstage access area and start to look for my new partner.

I see a woman with long chestnut-colored hair that falls in soft ringlets. Her mask is silver and matches her dress. I introduce myself, and Katherine—who prefers to be called Kate—compliments my work.

“Are you ready to get started? As you know, we would normally interview the band first, but tonight is different.”

I nod.

“Before the show starts why don’t you take a walk around and get some shots of the people in their masks. Just have fun.”

“Is there a place I can stash my bag?”

“Yeah, in the green room, that’s where everyone is keeping their gear.”

“Great, thank you.” I head in the direction of the green room. I keep an eye out for anyone I might recognize and by that I mean Ben. It’s really hard to tell with everyone in masks.

I pass people in very formal wear and more alternative dress wear like myself. I see some guys in leathery like suits, but no sleeves. I know exactly who that is in front of me: Brent Smith, lead singer of Shinedown. There is no way I can talk to him. He walks out of the green room and I have to step to the side to let him through.

He looks at me as he passes, “Nice mask,” he says with a smile. And my knees go weak. Thank God for this mask so he can’t see me blush.

“Thanks,” I tell him.

I set my bag down and set up my camera amid a few other press people. As I’m crouched, I feel a charge of static electricity. A familiar sensation.

I feel Ben’s eyes on me. I am afraid to turn around and look at him, but I can feel him willing me to look him in the eyes. I slowly stand and turn in his direction, which happens to be the doorway.

Fuck. No way of escaping.

I stand in my spot and when my eyes meet his deep heavy eyes, my body feels like it weighs a ton. My heart quickens. He is standing with one arm bent on the door jamb and one hand in his pocket. He is wearing a simple black mask and the string holding it on is hot pink. I know he did that for me.

I have to get going and get to work. I take one step towards him. His face is blank and unable to read. I stop in front of him and I wait for him to move, which of course he doesn’t.

“Excuse me.” I whisper.

“I miss you.”

I can’t let this get to me before the show, before I take on one of the biggest events I am sure I will ever cover. I try to move past him, but he steps in the way.

“You look beautiful.”

“Thank you, but I really need to get to work.”

He drops his head and looks at me through his dark hooded eyes, behind his mask. He is so fucking sexy right now. I clench my thighs together to try and subside my rising need for him. Between his look, his tux, mask and his scent all rolled together with his accent I want to take him here in this room.

“Did you get a piercing?” He leans in even closer.

I don’t say anything; I couldn’t even if I wanted to. I know if I were to try and speak I would just moan.

“I think it’s very sexy.” He runs his nose along my jaw, sending shivers down my body.

I put my hand on his tight chest and I push him back slightly. I get out of the door and I don’t look back. I take a steadying breath as I head to the front of the stage on the floor to start taking photos before the band goes on.

I snap photos left and right of the crowd. It’s kind of funny, seeing people dressed so elegantly for a rock show.

The lights lower and everyone hollers with excitement. Hell, I do too! The drums start on the black stage, then a guitar joins in. When a single light beams straight down the center of the stage Brent is already standing there.

“I want to thank everyone for coming tonight to spread the word on bullying. Too many kids and teens are tormented and tortured day in and day out, for no good reason,” he says. “The reality is there is no reason to bully anyone. We all have either been the subject of a bully or have bullied someone, sometime or another. Words hurt. Actions hurt. The torment can kill. So stand up! Stand up and help spread the word of the victims who have gone through so much and couldn’t find any other escape, but to take their lives. Because…”

The music starts to build, “We don’t have to take this!” The music booms and flames shoot up from both side of the stage as they beat out into their single “Bully.”

They definitely put on a great show and give me more photo opportunities than any other show I have been to.

Each song reminds me of Ben. Everything we have been through.

Almost at the end of the show I feel my phone buzz. It’s Kate texting me.

Head up to the balcony for some high shots
.

You got it
, I reply.

The view from up here is outstanding, between the array of colorful gowns and masks of the people in the crowed, to the constant changing stage lights and pyrotechnics.

Then it goes pitch black. All music stops. People are quiet.

This is eerie.

My favorite Shinedown song, “Miracle,” starts to play. But there’s still no lights or vocals. Then I hear a different voice start to sing.

“
Say it once tell me twice are you certain I’m all right…
”

As I listen, the deep rich Gavin Rossdale sound begins to sound familiar. I am a bit away from the stage so I hold my camera up and zoom in as close as I can get, but it’s still so freaking dark.

Then a single pink light come on when the chorus picks up, and I gasp.

Ben. Ben is on stage singing my song.

I pull my camera from my face and just stare. He looks up at me and points when he belts, “
You are the miracle in me
.” I reach for my mask and I take it off. I can barely breathe; tears flow down my face.

He never stops looking up at me.

The song ends and the lights dim, and he is still on stage. The people on the floor lift up what looks like cell phones and hold them still. Then “I’ll Follow You” starts to play and the phone lights start to sway in unison. But how do they know to do this? At most shows, the singer tells the audience what to do.

Ben starts to sing again and the lights move in a wave pattern, in time to the song. Just after the chorus, Ben stops singing and the lights go off and all the phones drop. The instruments continue to play. A minute later, Brent starts to sing. And I am slightly disappointed.

My eyes are glued to the floor. The cell phones are back up as Brent sings on the dark stage. I see nothing but hundreds of lighted screens. It is like they are synchronized; some drop while other stay up in patterns.

Near the end of the song the lights move. The people are moving in a circle, and then half drop, and the lights spell out “Tess.”

What the hell is going on?

I lean over the balcony slightly in awe. The lights start to move in another circle this time when they stop they read:

Will you marry me?

I am shaking, I take a step backwards and I feel a body behind me, startled I turn around to find Ben on one knee.

I gasp and clutch my hand over my mouth.

He is holding a little black box. He looks up at me. “You are my world. You are my life. You are my permanent. I love you more than what words can describe. Will you please do me the honor of marrying me?”

He opens the box to reveal a princess-cut diamond on a silver band and there are two little pink diamonds on each side. I feel my cheeks warming from all the tears flowing; I am glad I opted for waterproof makeup.

I am speechless.

“Before you say no,” Ben says, “I need to explain something to you.”

My knees are weak and I drop to the floor in front of him. He takes my hand and looks me in the eyes and starts.

“I know you left New York because you saw Nicole. You saw her with her hands all over me and me taking her backstage. I didn’t know she was going to be there, she was supposed to mail it…

“When she kept texting and calling me, she was giving me a hard time about it all. And when you confronted me that night about seeing the texts and missed calls, you drank so much you passed out and forgot about it the next morning. I thought I was in the clear. I didn’t want it to ruin this.”

He motions between us.

“Did you sleep with her Ben?” I have to ask. I need to know.

“No. I would never do that to you, nor would I want to.”

He inches in closer and rest his hand on my cheek, “I did contact her first, though, but not for sex or to try and get back together, which you probably think…”

“I know you went to her place. Why? What happened?” I wanted answers and I am finally getting them.

I see a tear drop from his eye and his voice cracks slightly. “I wanted my Mum’s ring back… She came into Chatz telling me that if I wanted the ring, that I needed to follow her back to her new place here in the city. She seemed like she was giving in and I didn’t think I had to worry. When I got inside she tried to seduce me and I got the hell out of there. Nothing and I mean
nothing
happened.”

My eyes widen and I look back down to the ring he is holding in the box and then back up to him. “Let me get this straight… you called Nicole to get the ring you gave her… back?”

“She wanted me to sleep with her one more time, she thought that, that would change my mind about you and go back crawling to her… It was my Mum’s and she never deserved it. She never deserved me. It took me finding you to realize the man I should be and can be. I have always thought I was never good for anyone, hell, I still have a hard time believing you want me… or is it wanted?” He asks, unsure of my answer to his ultimate question.

Before I can say anything he explains, “The diamond and band are the original setting, but it was too traditional and you are anything but traditional. That is why I had the two pink diamonds added. It is the perfect combination of Mum, who loved my father and he loved her more than anyone, has loved someone… and you. You are the exception, because no one could love someone as much as I love you… and not being able to tell you any of this all this time has been killing me, but I couldn’t ruin this moment.”

I bite my lip. “Yes,” I whisper as I reach his mouth.

“Yes?” he gasps.

I nod and he attacks my mouth and his hands wrap around the back of my neck and my lower back. “God I have missed you so much,” he says between our kisses.

“I missed you too.”

Backing away he pulls the ring out of the box and returns to one knee. “Tess Martin, will you marry me?”

“Yes! A million times yes!”

He slips the ring on me and stands up fast, pulling me up with him, and leads me to the edge of the dimly lit balcony. Soft music plays from the stage.

Leaning over the edge he yells, “She said yes!” And the floor erupts with clapping and catcalls.

“Come, I want you to meet the guys.”

I let Ben lead me downstairs and through the backstage area. A couple of the guys recognize Ben and rush him. One of which is Brent. Oh my.

“So she said yes?” he asks Ben.

Ben holds up my hand to show off my ring, and I blush and try to hide my face with my right hand.

Brent gives me a big hug, and I think I just squeaked. “He is a great guy, Tess. He has told us all about you. He has been planning this for some time now. When he came to me and told me what he wanted to do, of course I had to say yes.”

Huh, Brent is a hopeless romantic. That just makes me love him even more.

“Thank you so much again, man! Obviously it worked.” Ben winks at me.

I tip my head up and kiss him.

“Ahhh, all right, lovebirds, go enjoy the ball. We will catch up later.”

“Ready to party?” Ben asks.

“With you.” I wink at him and I reach behind him and grab his tight British ass. God, I missed touching him. And I am raging right about now.

“Why, Miss Martin, are you trying to seduce me?”

“Yes. Yes I am.”

He leans down and looks me dead in the eyes. “I love you.”

I smile the biggest smile of my life. My butterflies have returned full force, but then again I don’t think they ever left. Instead, I trapped them in a glass jar and put them on a top shelf. High enough to see, but not touch or feel.