It was time to settle things. Somehow. Taking a deep breath, Stacey depressed the plate. To her surprise the door opened. Without pausing she raised her chin and strode into the room, prepared to have it out with the darn man. All thoughts of confrontation slipped from her mind when she saw him. Alex sat on the edge of a couch, a small picture cradled in his hands. He looked up at her entrance and the anguish in his expression pained her. For an endless moment, his despair was there for her to see. Then, in the blink of an eye, it disappeared to be replaced by his usual, neutral mask.
“What is it? What’s wrong? Have you heard something?” Stacey moved deeper into the sitting room with each question.
“No.”
Just one word, no explanation. Typical, arrogant Sullivan. She wondered whether he’d deny the hopelessness she’d seen on his face if she asked him about it point blank. But she knew better than to do that. It would be like prodding the panther with a sharp stick and hoping he didn’t lash out. “Then why are you sitting here like this?” Stacey gestured toward him with her hand.
He gave her a long look and she held her breath, sure he wouldn’t say a word. Then he sighed, sat back in his seat and placed the picture on the table beside him.
“Just thinking,” he finally said.
“About Ravyn.”
Alex didn’t answer, but he didn’t need to. She could see the picture he’d put on the table. In it he wore his Western Alliance uniform and Ravyn wore the CAT uniform. Both were smiling. Stacey recognized it as the photo Ravyn had insisted on having made before she left for Jarved Nine. People commonly carried mementoes, but she would never have pegged the austere man in front of her as one of them.
Stacey sat beside him; she placed a hand on his forearm. She felt his muscles tighten before he relaxed. He didn’t pull away from her touch, but except for that involuntary movement, he didn’t respond either. “You’re playing the ‘what if game,’” Stacey said, keeping her voice low. “What if Ravyn is dead? What if Ravyn is injured? What if her injuries are bad enough that she’s dying as we make our way to Jarved Nine? What if we’re too late?”
His muscles tensed again beneath her hand—heck, his whole body tensed. Stacey knew she’d hit the nail on the head. It explained why he hadn’t come searching for her tonight and why he’d looked so miserable when she’d entered. “What if” could be a dangerous game.
“How about this, Alex: What if Ravyn is fine? What if there is a logical explanation why contact was lost with both the CAT and Spec Ops teams? What if everyone is waiting healthy and whole for the rescue team to arrive?” This was her dearest hope.
He turned his head and studied her. “Not likely,” he said, voice like gravel.
“Wrong. My ’what ifs’ are every bit as likely as the scenarios you’ve been running through your head.” Since she didn’t believe this herself, Stacey had a hard time injecting her words with confidence.
“No, they’re not. I wish to hell they were. I’ve been a soldier for a lot of years. When contact is lost that abruptly and not reestablished it’s never a good sign, Stacey.”
For a moment, she reveled in the sound of her name coming from his lips. He tended to not address her by name at all if he could help it, and when he had to, he usually called her Johnson. She disregarded the pleasant warmth in her chest when he moved away from her and leaned forward again, his forearms braced on his knees. His stoicism didn’t fool her. Even with his face impassive, she knew he’d gone beyond worry. He’d never struck her as someone given to melancholy, and she had to wonder why he chose to wallow in it now. And why he didn’t do a better job of concealing it.
“I think you just want to feel sorry for yourself, Sullivan.” She tossed the words out there like a gauntlet and waited for his response. It didn’t take long to get one. He leaped to his feet as if he’d been zapped with a cattle prod.
He turned, glared at her and said with enough ice to freeze hell, “You don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Oh, yeah?” Stacey got to her feet and squared off against him. “I know you’re sitting all alone in your cabin, thinking about how you’re going to deal with Ravyn’s death. You told me yourself that you trained her. How can you write her off this easily? You’ve held her up as a shining example for me to follow, but when it comes right down to it, you don’t believe in her or her abilities. Makes me wonder why you’re bothering to train me. It won’t make any difference in the outcome, right?”
Alex opened his mouth and shut it without saying a word. His jaw tightened so much, she was surprised it didn’t crack. “Lady,” he finally said, “what the hell did I do to deserve you?”
She knew he didn’t mean it as a compliment, but she said, “I don’t know. I guess the angels are smiling on you.”
His lips quirked in a smile he couldn’t suppress and Stacey let out the breath she’d been holding as she felt his mood lift.
“Alex,” Stacey said, moving closer, “if anyone can take care of herself, it’s Ravyn. And she has an entire Spec Ops team there to dance attendance on her. I hope they’re not so busy protecting her that they forget about the others.”
He laughed, a rich, full sound she felt in every cell of her body. “She does have a way of wrapping the biggest, toughest men around her finger.” Sobering, Alex slipped his hands into the front pockets of his fatigue pants. “I just hope Brody can handle her and the situation.”
Something about the way he said the other man’s name caught Stacey’s attention. “You don’t like him, Brody, do you?”
“No.”
“Come on, Sullivan, I know Ravyn taught you better. One-word responses are unacceptable.
Why
don’t you like him?”
He took his hands out of his pockets, the look in his eyes colder than she’d ever seen it. Nervously, she twisted a strand of hair that had escaped her ponytail and tried to find some of the bravado that had lead her to his cabin. Alex folded his arms over his chest and leaned against the wall. One booted foot crossed the other at the ankle. “A friend of mine from West Point was wounded on a mission during the Third War. It fell to Brody to get him out of enemy territory safely. Brody got Sam out, but not before he was injured further. The injuries were severe enough to end his career.”
“That was Brody’s fault?”
Alex nodded once, sharply. “He made some bad decisions.”
“So,” Stacey said slowly, trying to think while she spoke, “you’re worried that he’ll get Ravyn hurt?”
“No.” Stacey glared at him until he continued. “Brody knows what he’s doing now. Hell, he was little more than a kid when that whole mess transpired.”
“Why do you dislike him then? Obviously he’s competent if you aren’t concerned about his abilities now. You can’t blame him for being inexperienced back then.”
“It’s his fault Sam’s career is over.”
“Does Sam blame him?”
Alex shook his head and straightened. Her laying siege to his shaky logic made him nervous, she decided. That wasn’t her purpose, she just wanted to understand him, but the conversation interested her too much to drop. “Come on, Alex,” she coaxed, “there’s more to it than that. Let’s hear the rest of it.”
His lips tightened stubbornly. He shifted as she came closer, and Stacey shadowed his movements. She couldn’t believe
she
put
him
in a sweat, but for every step she took, he moved away. He didn’t stop until she had him in the corner with no place to go. The rabbit had trapped the panther. Confident now, Stacey moved forward. It was a mistake. She realized it the instant she came within reach. He pounced. Before she had time to react, he had her backed into the same corner he’d been in. His body crowded hers as he loomed over her.
“Why are you really here, Stace?”
She looked up at him, unsure what to say. All she could think about was the heat of his body pressed into hers. The sound of his voice was like hot fudge flowing over ice cream. Smooth and rich and oh, so sinful. She stared into his eyes and knew he had well and truly caught her.
He laughed, not in amusement, but in pleasure. His hands came up to her shoulders before running down her arms and catching her wrists. Alex brought her arms up so that they went around his neck. “Take what you want,” he told her.
She did. She pulled his mouth down to hers and kissed him. She kissed him the way she’d been dreaming of for six years. His lips were warm and incredibly soft for such a hard man. He didn’t try to wrest control from her, but followed where she led. She took the kiss deeper. She knew she’d have to make a decision soon on whether to stop this, but not yet. Not yet. An urgent need seemed to emanate from him and Stacey found herself responding to it, becoming desperate herself. She held on tighter as the mating of their mouths became savage.
Stacey gasped as his callused hands covered her bare breasts. Alex had taken over although she wasn’t sure when it had happened. He had her so lost in sensation that she hadn’t felt him unbutton her blouse or open her bra. He pulled back and looked down. His harsh breathing sounded loud. She followed his gaze and was mesmerized by the sight of his hands on her. She should stop this, she should stop this.
Their eyes met and she read the want in him before he lowered his head and replaced one of his hands with his mouth. Stacey’s head fell back as she arched into him. She heard the rasp of a zipper, then felt the roughness of his fingers as he slid his hand between her legs. He knew just how to touch her, and she couldn’t stop the sounds that escaped her lips. She hit the peak so fast she cried out as much in surprise as in pleasure. The feeling of cool air where his warm hand had been forced her to open her eyes.
Do something, she told herself when she realized he was baring the lower half of her body. Stacey tightened her grip on his shoulders as Alex crouched in front of her and freed a leg from the restriction of her clothes.
As he stood, his hands opened the fly of his fatigues and pushed them down over his hips. Stacey’s eyes widened, but before she could decide what to do, his mouth covered hers again. This time he teased her, and with a sigh, she surrendered. She reached for the buttons on his shirt, opening them with haste. She barely registered the heat of his skin on her fingers before he moved between her thighs and she lost herself in the feel of his hardness sliding against her. There were no words spoken. He led and she followed. When he lifted her, she wrapped her legs around him and guided him home.
Alex slid in slowly and stopped, letting them both get used to the feel of him inside her. He couldn’t help but groan. It felt good. Too damn good. And then he had to move. He meant to be gentle, but he felt his control slipping away. He grabbed for it, but it danced outside his reach. He retained just enough presence of mind to make sure his hard thrusts didn’t hurt Stacey. When it registered that she enjoyed his possession, he let go completely.
The noises she made pushed him closer to the edge, but he’d be damned if he was going over alone. He adjusted her position slightly and continued to stroke into her. It didn’t take long before he felt her entire body tense and then she screamed. The last thread of his restraint snapped, and with a groan that felt torn from his soul, Alex allowed his own climax.
It took him a long time to regain awareness. Her fingers toyed with his hair. Her mouth pressed kisses into his throat, causing little ripples of response throughout his entire body. His arms quivered from holding Stacey’s weight, but he wasn’t ready to pull out yet. He could stay this way forever. The instant the realization registered, he tensed.
Forever?
Alex separated their bodies and eased her down until Stacey’s feet touched the floor, but he couldn’t quite let go of her yet. She’d already made him lose control, something he’d never done before, not even with Lara. Now she had him thinking of forever and he knew better than that. Anger gave him the strength to close the holes she’d made in his wall.
When he pulled back, he was able to keep his face impassive although it wasn’t easy when he got a look at Stacey. He tugged up his pants, tucked himself away and zipped up again. Alex swallowed hard. She stood there alone and disheveled, making no move to cover herself. He felt his body begin to come back to life and even took a step toward her before he stopped himself. Self-preservation came to his rescue. “I’ll see you tomorrow morning for training,” he said with seeming indifference. The stricken look on her face nearly felled him, but he walked away, closing the door to his sleeping area behind him. He fisted his hands against the wall, fighting not to go back to her.
Alex heard her leave a few minutes later. It was only imagination that made him think he’d just made a huge mistake.
*** *** ***
Ravyn padded out of the bathing chamber, her bare feet making no sound on the stone floor. Stopping, she flexed her toes on the smooth surface. It should have been cold or at least cool, but it wasn’t. Like just about everything else in the room, the floor was gray. Only the bursts of bright color throughout the chamber kept it from being depressing.
With a shrug, Ravyn resumed walking. She normally had little interest in how a place was decorated, but she couldn’t seem to stop herself from studying her current surroundings. The carpet that covered most of the floor was a mishmash of pale blue, pink, deep green and gold. Instead of being ugly, it seemed perfect. She knew it had been made to match the obelisks that occupied each corner of the room.
Tired of the dim lighting, Ravyn waved a hand toward the outside wall. Fascinated, and with a bit of surprise, she watched it transform from opaque stone until it was clear as glass. Bright sunshine streamed in and she blinked several times as her eyes adjusted. Unable to stop herself, she went to the wall and reached out a hand. It felt like plain, ordinary stone. Ravyn laughed quietly in delight. This place amazed her. Movement caught her attention and she focused on the grounds beyond the wall. For a moment, she didn’t see anything and then the small lake churned as Damon broke the surface.
Part of her relaxed. She hadn’t been worried about him; they were safe within the walls of the Old City, but she’d gotten accustomed to him being nearby when she woke. You better get used to his absence, she told herself. She knew if they stayed together once they returned to Earth, she’d often be waking up alone. He’d be gone on missions for days, weeks, months at a time. The reminder sobered her.