Reaching Out to the Stars (11 page)

We arrived at the show early, at about six o’clock, to get my program and my eight by ten photo. I had a lot of anxiety because I did not know where Marilyn and Gerome’s seats were located. I wanted to be able to find them so that I could pass off my program and eight by ten photo to them for a possible autograph. I did not know if they would be meeting the idols before or after the show and I knew that if I did not find them that my chances of getting even an autograph would be as good as gone. Getting the autograph meant so much to me because I knew that realistically it would probably be the closest thing I would ever get to meeting him.

As we found our seats, we ran into our friends Jude and Sierra. It was so funny because five years ago the four of us met at the same place for American Idols Live, Season Two. That’s right, that was the year I foolishly thought that on my birthday I would meet Clay Aiken. Insert laughter here!

As we were all having a conversation, I kept looking around for Marilyn and Gerome and now that I am thinking about it, they probably thought I was acting weird or even maybe a bit rude. I was in luck because I finally caught sight of Marilyn and Gerome and I took off like a bullet, again rude. They were actually seated in the same section as us, which by the way were pretty good seats. I remember Bryce saying, “These are the best seats I have ever had at a show.”

I said in response, “They should be for what I paid for them.”

Then he asked, “What? How much did you pay for them?”

My response was, “Never mind.” I was now going to have to prepare myself for the ass ripping I was going to get for the crazy amount of money I spent on the tickets. Gladly, nothing was ever said.

Anyway, I was able to pass off my program and my picture to Marilyn and Gerome, as they were meeting with all of the idols after the show, the luckiest people ever.

As the show began, I was so excited. They started with the number ten contestant and worked their way down, each contestant singing three songs. I thoroughly enjoyed all of them and of course they decided to have an intermission right before my favorite hit the stage. It was alright because I was starving and it gave me a chance to get some food since I skipped dinner to get to the show early. I had so much anxiety waiting in the snack line. It seemed to take forever and if I did not make it back to my seat when the show started back up again, nobody was going to want to be in my way.

I also felt like the break was good because, as it never fails, we had the biggest group of tools sitting in front of us. Through the entire show, they kept getting up for beers and would come back double fisted. They were so loaded and obnoxious and I was getting really irritated. Who the hell gets trashed at an American Idol concert? It’s a family show for cryin’ out loud!

As I did make it back in plenty of time, unfortunately, so did the ensemble in front of us who continued to get up and come back several times for their frequent bathroom breaks after drinking two beers every ten minutes.

I was excited to watch my idol perform but he was a little off that night. I wondered if he was sick or even losing his voice a bit. I felt that although he only performed three songs, it seemed to go by so fast. I regretted not bringing my camera. As in most shows, I could always remember the performances so clearly and could always remember what they were wearing but for some reason it was like a complete blur to me. I think what happened was that I was so focused on his face and so taken by the sound of his voice that I didn’t remember a freakin’ thing.

As runner up, David Archuletta rose up through the stage playing piano and singing John Lennon’s “Imagine.” The crowd erupted. There were tons of Archuletta fans. Bryce and I were laughing because there was a woman who was going absolutely nuts about four rows down from us who was easily in her forties. I thought she was going to come out of her skin. What was even funnier was the forty something year old gentleman who then walked up our aisle with a homemade David Archuletta t-shirt.

The one thing I will never forget was the outstanding performance by David Cook. He was definitely one of the most genuine American Idol winners. I remember watching the show week after week and Simon calling him arrogant. What really bothers me about this is that the judges tell the performers they need to have confidence and then when they have it, all of a sudden they are deemed arrogant. As I mostly agree with Simon’s opinions when it comes to singing, I totally disagreed with this comment.

I also disagreed with his comment about Carly Smithson not dressing well. She was another one of my season seven favorites. Mr. Man Boobs himself, with the black t-shirt he wears on every show, as he should appear in a daily animated cartoon, should not be giving fashion advice to anyone. If I remember correctly, it was him five years ago who said with his English accent, “This is a singing competition!”

As I watched David Cook perform that night, it was obvious that he is just a natural performer. At one point during his performance, he came to the side of the stage that we were sitting on and there were a couple of teenage girls trying to take his picture. When he completely acknowledged them by pointing and smiling at them, they looked at each other, mouths wide open screaming.

It was such a great example of what kind of an overwhelming feeling a fan gets when they are actually acknowledged, individually picked out in the crowd. Although he didn’t know them, he probably made there night more special than he could ever imagine. I will most definitely be purchasing the new David Cook CD when it is released.

When I went home that night, I was so excited. I was anxiously awaiting a phone call in the morning from Marilyn, but at the same time I didn’t want to get my hopes up.

I usually do not have that kind of luck, in a way, I guess I kind of did that night. When Marilyn called, she told me she got me the top five contestants’ autographs along with Michael Johns, who finished eighth in the competition. She also got my eight by ten signed. I was so excited because I did not expect all of those autographs. I was just hoping for the one, hoping that she could get close enough to just get the one.

She also got personal pictures with most of them and she had them made for me. After looking at the pictures, I noticed that my idol was wearing a white denim jacket and jeans. It still did not ring any bells to me other than the hair being tied half back. The truth is that I was so enthralled with just being in the same room with him that night that I don’t think I would have noticed if he was not wearing anything at all. Okay, yes I would!

In truth, I have never been attracted to any man for his body. It is actually always the last thing that I notice. I have always seemed to be attracted to taller thinner men. I always notice a face first. Smile and teeth are always important followed by eyes and hair. To me, there is nothing sexier than a man who can sing. Playing an instrument is another plus. The most important things, of course, are sense of humor and personality because without that, none of the other things really matter. They are irrelevant.

I once met a guy on the Spirit of Boston cruise when I was at an anniversary party for my Auntie Beverly and Uncle Rick. It was a great time. I noticed him right away because he was absolutely perfect, like a Ken doll. As we exchanged information, I found out that he went to a local college in Boston and was from Ohio. We actually got together a couple of times but the minute he opened his mouth, he was actually quite ugly. Needless to say that didn’t work. It doesn’t matter how beautiful you are, it’s what is on the inside that counts. It’s not that he was a bad guy, but we just had very different personalities, senses of humor and very different ideas about life.

Marilyn then proceeded to tell me that she actually had a lengthy conversation with my favorite idol. As I listened to her with envy, she told me that he had the most gorgeous eyes, which I knew but would have loved to experience. What a tease. I had asked her if he was sick or losing his voice and she said no, but as she approached him the first thing that he said to her was “I am so tired.” She said that they were all so exhausted, mentally and physically, and that she felt bad for them. As she has three sons of her own, she gave him a hug. She said that shockingly, he actually squeezed her when he hugged her back, seeming so homesick. She said he was one of the most down to earth and nicest people that she ever met. I came very close to asking her what he smelled like but I thought that may be crossing the line.

I immediately went shopping for frames for my new pictures.

I keep them on my nightstand as I frequently get the head shake or the eye roll from my husband. I often think about the fact that he actually had to touch that picture to sign it. Therefore, I don’t let anyone else touch it.

I was so excited about my news and so excited to share it with someone that I again attempted to call Maria. As she answered the phone she sounded very unenthusiastic to speak with me. I guess I should have taken the hint then, but being as excited as I was, I began to tell her about the show and how Marilyn and Gerome had gotten all of the autographs for me and how exciting it was. Her response was, “Yeah, I guess it’s exciting, if you’re into that.”

At that moment I grew sad when I realized that she had become a different kind of friend, the friend that had really become more of an acquaintance. What’s a friend for if you can’t talk to them about your passions and the things that you get excited about? As I am still hurt by her reaction to my news, I guess I can’t expect everyone to have the same passions as I do. I do believe though that she could have been a little more enthusiastic, even if she wasn’t “into it.” I started to miss my old friend. Someday, I hope to have her back. One of my favorite quotes says it best: “In order to have a friend, you need to be a friend.”

As the excitement started to wear off a little I was able to reflect on some of the things that Marilyn had told me about her conversation with my idol.

When the final weeks of American Idol neared, there were speculations about my idol actually wanting to be voted off the show. I am not sure if that was the plan or not but I definitely think that he was feeling some extreme pressure and was not comfortable with it.

Because of his laid back personality, I think he started experiencing what I have been referring to all along as the “dream” that isn’t really the “dream.” I’m sure a lot of this great life experience that most people will never get an opportunity to even come close to was in fact a wonderful experience. But when do you reach a point where you’ve “had enough?” I believe that some people are made for this type of lifestyle, and I am also pretty sure that most of us are not. The truth is, when you really love to do something that actually seems as though it is becoming more of a chore, is it really enjoyable anymore?

I sensed that my new idol was the type of person that would much prefer the behind the scenes type of fame. Although the show was a chance of a lifetime and a great experience, perhaps it was more of a sacrifice for exposure. Maybe it is possible to capture a fan base big enough for a promising future career to be able to create and perform music at a more comfortable pace. This might be more suitable for us ordinary, down to earth and sometimes even camera shy people.

I felt that if I was on the right path, I could understand his way of thinking and I started to answer some of my wonders about stardom. As a lot of my past thoughts and questions began to resurface, I remembered my mind going through the same vicious cycle as when I was so into Clay. I always had that constant urge to meet with him and pick his brain about the change from normalcy to Hollywood craziness. In my attempts for answers, I always ended up disappointed and so I had decided that I was all set with fan letters. On the other hand, I started to reconsider an idea that I had earlier.

2008

American Idol Live Tour

DCU Center

Worcester, MA