River's Escape (River's End Series, #2) (30 page)

She decided to never again leave Ian, or doubt his sincerity.

She smiled and closed her eyes, holding him next to her. He needed her for reasons she didn’t totally understand; and saw things in her she didn’t know she possessed. He thought there was something special and extraordinary about her, and that made him feel better. She didn’t get it, but she’d never again doubt whatever he managed to find in her.

Unfortunately, being in middle of the mountain with no central heating, it was getting dark and cold fast. A shiver trembled over her body. Ian felt it, and true to form, instantly got up and quickly buckled his pants and hers. He started to build a fire in the small stove. She turned on her side and watched him. She felt glad now, unlike a year ago, that she could simply observe him in the quiet twilight. He glanced at her staring at him and a small, soft, half smile crossed his face. “Are you hungry?”

“No. Just come back over here.” She had finally lost her shyness and awkwardness around him. She knew him so well, she could read his moods and thoughts, as well as what he wanted.
Her.
He most wanted her in his life. How could she think she’d grow bitter and unhappy when for the first time in her life, because of Ian, she was finally not bitter and totally happy? He came back to the cot and slid in beside her so his arms were around her, and his knees at the backs of hers. She sighed as his warmth seeped through her clothing.

“You said a lot out there.”

“I meant every word of it.”

“You really want to try this?”

“I’m desperate to try this.”

“Desperate, huh? For me? Despite the long distance?”

“Yes, for you. However you’ll agree to be with me.”

She felt his body tensing as he gave a kind of careless shrug, but she knew it wasn’t casual at all. Then he said, “I should be done with the first phase of the ranch redesign and expansion by winter. Or at least to a point where Jack can handle it. Perhaps, I could come to Seattle with you, that is, if you wanted me to.”

She flipped over so fast, she almost fell off the side of the narrow cot. She could barely make out his facial expression as the firelight flickered and made shadows. A tremor ran up her spine. “Do you mean, you’d leave River’s End? To be with me?”

“Depends on your reply if I meant that.”

“I think I’d give you a blow job right now just to make you feel as happy as that would make me feel.”

His laugh was quick and endearing. “Wow. That’s not exactly how you might’ve worded it a year ago.”

She took her glove off and touched his face. He had some stubble on his chin, just barely enough to make a scruff. “Do you mean that? You would come with me?”

“Only if you wanted. I wouldn’t want to cramp your lifestyle. Maybe you would prefer to keep it long distance. But come January, there wouldn’t be any reason why I couldn’t go there.”

“What would you do?”

“Get a job. I’m not an unskilled worker, Kailynn. I have a business degree; remember? Pretty sure I could find something to keep me busy.”

“No, I meant about the ranch. Your brothers. Everything you have to do around here. Everything that you love is here. You would hate being in a city.”

“I can live in a big city. I’m not a total hick. I would rather live with you, and go where you’re happy than live in River’s End without you again.”

She closed her eyes and her breath sounded heavy in her chest. When she opened her eyes again, she blinked away some tears. “Oh my God. Do you mean that?”

“Oh my God, yes, if you meant what you said,” he replied, flashing a grin and using her same breathy tone. How did he manage to make her cry and smile and fall in love with him as if it were the first time? “Unless I’ll embarrass you. Being the rancher from River’s End and your boyfriend might not be so cool.”

She made him feel inferior, and she knew that. Deep down, she made him feel like he wasn’t enough for her as he was. She leaned over and kissed his lips, rolling on top of him. She felt initially annoyed with all the clothes between them, but it was way too cold now to remove them. “I would be the happiest person in Seattle if you’d come with me. And be with me. And live with me. That’s what we’re talking about, right?”

He nodded. “Yeah, our own place. Near the school.”

“I could transfer somewhere closer. Somewhere out of the city.”

“You don’t need to transfer. I’m really okay living there.”

She leaned her forehead down on his chest and inhaled a deep, happy breath. She never dreamed she’d find a way to have the life she preferred, and the man she wanted more than anything. “I love you, Ian. I love you so much. Will you take me to the lake tomorrow? To the top of the mountain again? Then will you come with me to the city? I’ll show you the top of all the places I’ve found there.”

He cupped her face and nodded solemnly. “I’ll take you there. I’ll show you whatever you want, and I’d love nothing more than sharing whatever makes you happy.”

“Tell me you love me again.”

He smiled with that half grin that first stole her heart, and warmed her entire body. “I love you, Kailynn Hayes.”

“Will you tell me that often? So I never can possibly forget? I know you don’t use a lot of words, but I need to hear yours. I need to hear all your words.”

He squeezed her to his chest and whispered, “How about if I tell you every day for the rest of my life?”

She closed her eyes and rested her head on him, watching the shadows flicker while the hot fire crackled. She finally lifted her head and smiled, “I might be kind of hungry now.”

“Your wish has always been my command,” he replied while getting up. Without further conversation, he started stoking the fire outside to cook their dinner. How could she ever think he wasn’t enough man for her? Maybe she was glad she left. Glad she finally realized her dream. But even gladder she knew now how precious it was to love and be loved by the right person.

She followed him outside and started cutting up the vegetables so they could prepare the stew together.

“I’D FOLLOW THE GIRL.”

Ian turned when Jack’s voice came up behind him after he had just stowed the last suitcase in the back of his truck. “What?”

“You asked me a while ago what I would have done if Erin refused to live here. If I didn’t have kids, I would have followed her wherever she needed to go.”

Ian nodded and smiled at his older brother. Jack had his arms crossed over his chest and his scowl was deep. “Yeah, you’d follow the girl if she wanted you to.”

They stood in front of the house as Ian finished loading the last of his things he was taking to Seattle. Kailynn and Erin were on the porch talking. Kailynn had stayed with him over her winter break and it was the longest amount of time they’d ever spent together. It was the start of their life together. And the true start of his life.

“This sucks. But I get it.”

He smacked Jack on the shoulder. “I’ll be back next weekend. I’m only four hours away. Not forty. I’ll be back a lot. I got horses to ride, improvements to check on, and my own house to supervise. Besides, where the hell can I do that in the University District?” He and Kailynn spent several weekends in late December searching for housing around the University of Washington. They eventually found a small apartment that was less square footage than Ian’s bedroom at the ranch house, and cost three times what he thought was fair. But they eagerly signed the lease without a second thought. It was clean, walking distance from the school, and her best friend lived just a half mile away.

Ian found work with a corporation that owned and operated acres and acres of farm land. They had farms and orchards all over the west coast, and their headquarters were based out of Seattle. His job was coordinating, developing, and implementing the best agricultural techniques. He was working for the very monster that nearly destroyed all the small family farms. It was a bitter pill for him to swallow, but also, something he was very good at. The work was related to his field, but far beyond anything he’d ever done. He had an office, downtown he would be working in. His life had truly morphed.

He felt kind of excited to see where his new career might take him, even if he were betraying what his father stood for, and the small family farmers. But at least, his job allowed him to make sure the best practices were being utilized for the communities’ benefit as well as that of the environment.

“You really can live like that?”

He shut the tailgate and canopy lid. “I can live that way with Kailynn, yes. Will we stay there forever? We don’t know. But wherever we end up, we intend to stay together.”

“You sure you want to go ahead with the house here?”

“I’ll always be back here, Jack. Whether just to visit or to live permanently. So, hell yeah, I’ll be building us a house.”

“Does she know that?”

“Yes, now that she insists that I talk to her. I’m not allowed to keep my plans to myself. She freaked about the money at first, but after I disclosed exactly how much I had, she agreed it was probably a good investment.”

Jack nodded as he looked off toward the mountains. “Things had to change, didn’t they? I’m glad you knew that. And you found what you wanted. And who you wanted. I’m grateful you’ll be back. But I’ll miss the hell out of you. It won’t be the same for me.”

Ian and Jack stared at each other. They had worked together almost seven days a week for almost a decade and a half. They both raised their two brothers and Jack’s two sons. They had been each other’s “right hand” longer than anyone else. It struck a chord in Ian’s heart to see the change, even if it was overdue. “We had a of lot good times, and we did well, didn’t we? With your boys, our brothers, and keeping this place going, Dad would have been proud.”

Jack nodded and pushed at the dirt with his booted toe. “Dad would have been very proud.”

Jack and Ian never hugged or talked about their affinity for each other. It just was between them, and different than the way it was with Shane and Joey. They just spoke each other’s language without unnecessary words and/or actions. Finally, Jack cleared his throat. “Well, fuck it. I have to give you a hug.”

Ian slapped his back with hard thump after they hugged. Clearing his throat, he said, “Next weekend, bro. See you then?”

Jack turned, and hid his eyes. Ian turned the opposite way and stared hard up the mountains above the ranch. “See you then,” Jack said as he walked away. Ian watched Kailynn exiting the house. She’d been hugging Erin, but it looked far easier and lasted much longer than his hug with Jack. Shane was gone, having left town the day after Christmas. He said he would crash with them in Seattle sometime in February when he planned to return home. Somehow, Ian thought he might be seeing more of Shane now that he was living in Seattle.

Ian opened the driver’s side door and set his foot down. No boots. He deliberately left all his cowboy boots and hats in his room at the ranch. He brought along tennis shoes and even some dress shoes, but no cowboy boots. Which was fine. He’d always straddled the line between being a cowboy like Jack and doing something different, something new, something like what he’d done in college. He and Kailynn didn’t have their plans set in stone. She had three more years of school. He figured he had plenty time to figure out what the hell he wanted to do too.

Kailynn stood next to the passenger side finally, with tears in her eyes. She’d already said all her goodbyes to her dad and brothers. There was nothing left to do now, but leave.

“Ready?”

“Yes.” She slid into the cab and so did Ian. He started the engine and shifted gears. This was so much easier than last September, when he dropped her off at school and came home to square things up there at the ranch. He couldn’t have left Jack to finish all his plans. This was only the first phase, of course. Come the spring, they planned to open up for guests to stay. There was still a lot of work to do, which would keep him busy on the weekends whenever they came home.

“Ian?”

He glanced at Kailynn as she stared at the ranch.

“Yeah?”

“I think if I was pulling in here right now, to live here for good, with you, I would be okay. I don’t think I would hate River’s End. Not like I used to. Leaving now is harder than I can ever remember it being.”

He reached across the cab and took her hand in his. She smiled up at him gratefully. “Tell me I’ll never have to face another place, new or familiar, without you, ever again. If I know that, I think almost anyplace in the world could become home for me.”

He tilted his head. “As if you have to question that.”

“Tell me anyway.” She loved hearing him say the things he felt. He shook his head with a smile and answered dutifully, “You’ll never be without me. I love you.”

She shut her eyes and breathed in deeply. “I love you too. Let’s go start our new life together.”

He glanced in the rearview mirror at the home his family meticulously built, cultivated, updated, and excelled in. The same place where so much tragedy and loss ripped through them all. The place he now chose to leave, knowing he could always come back, although he probably would never come back in the same way. But Kailynn was right; home was wherever she was. And he never felt more sure or more complete than when he pulled away from his family home with Kailynn Hayes beside him.

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