Second Chances (19 page)

“How’s that?”  Gavin asked, momentarily confused. 

“Oh, it’s silly, but for a moment I thought you had somehow managed to figure out how to turn Hannah into your hobby.”  She shrugged and moved away.

“Yeah, silly,” he said, feeling incredibly low. 

The court date snuck up on her, partially because she had been doing everything in her power to forget about it, avoid the worry, but mostly because once she had scanned and emailed Amy all of the paperwork she requested, Hannah had focused on other aspects of her life.  She had spent countless hours in the studio, hours that had definitely paid off.  For one thing, she had been able to take pictures and create a website to sell her crafts.  Her walk-in closet had become the storage for her completed projects, easily accessible for when she was working online and preparing shipments.

After some contemplation, she had decided to combine some of her mediums.  In addition to the hand painted glass container candles she had produced, she was now making a series of candles in coil pots.  Smiling, Hannah admired one of her latest creations.  For her, spending hours rolling the clay and shaping it into a coil pot was therapy.  She sighed blissfully.  Truth be told, living here was therapy. 

The routine that they had developed worked to provide her the security she craved.  She knew that every morning Gavin would join her in the keeping room for a few minutes to chat before going off to the office.  Sometimes he rattled off what he needed of her that day, other times he simply seemed to want to visit.  She had grown accustomed to dropping the girls off, running the necessary errands, and then working on a dinner plan before heading out to the studio.  The kitchen was nearly complete, so she could look forward to resuming her cooking duties in the very near future.  That, too, brought a smile to her face. 

Some of her favorite times, however, were the times that she was able to work uninterrupted in the studio.  Occasionally Madge would stop by to see what she was working on, but she never hovered for long.  So, with the radio on or some of her mix cds playing, she was left to her own devices.  And the result was astonishing even to her.  Already she had sold several of the new clay pot candles. 

That was it.  Her guard was down.  So when her iPhone reminded her that she had to be in court during what should have been her studio time, she was shaken to her core.  Sinking down on the bed, she struggled to pull herself together.  It was just a court hearing, nothing to worry about.  Not only would Amy be there to support her, she would be fighting for her.  Hannah tried valiantly to smile at that thought, but it was a weak one at best that couldn’t mask the fear in her eyes. 

Downstairs, Gavin was pacing.
  He was used to sharing this time each morning with Hannah.  He counted on it to get through the day.  Hearing the chattering in the dining room, he hoped he might find her there.  As he peeked in, however, he was disappointed to see the girls eating alone. 

They seemed to be deep in a discussion and he didn’t want to interrupt.  He had more important issues on his mind, like finding their mother.  Yet part of their conversation caught his attention.

“Don’t worry, Zoe,” Rory said quietly.  “Mommy must just be late.  That’s all.”

Playing with her cereal, Zoe looked down sadly.  “I hope so.  I hope it’s not like before, in the apartment.”  She sighed.

Laying an arm around her shoulder, Rory tried to comfort her sister.  “No.  Mommy’s better.  You know it.”

She seemed to think a moment before answering.  Her face brightened and she said, “Yup.”  Then she began munching her Honey Nut Cheerios happily.

Gavin couldn’t help it.  He had to ask.  “Was your mom sick?”  He felt his stomach clench as he awaited the answer.  He would feel even lower if he had been giving her all these tasks to accomplish and she had been ill.

Shaking her head emphatically, Zoe was the first to answer.  “No, just sad,” she explained.  She received a poke from Rory for her answer and immediately looked down, ashamed that she had said too much.

He studied them for a moment.  He had to dig deeper.  “How do you mean?”

Zoe opened her mouth to respond, but Rory silenced her with a glare.  Taking a deep breath, she answered anyway.  “We could hear mommy crying at night, really soft, like she didn’t want anyone to hear.  And she was really quiet and never had time to sing to us or play with us or read to us.”

This didn’t sound anything like the Hannah he knew.  “When was this?”  He asked to reconcile the image they painted with the woman he cared for.

“After daddy left,” Zoe said quietly.  She looked as though she wanted to say more, but Rory interrupted her.

“That doesn’t matter now.  Mommy’s all better.  Everything is better.”  She scowled at her sister, daring her to say anything else.

Gavin thought about what they had said.  If Hannah truly had been as sad as the girls described, then she
was
better.  He’d heard her singing as she cooked and cleaned.  He had seen her playing and dancing with the girls.  He’d listened in fascination as she passionately read to the girls at night.  He smiled.  This place, this job, and maybe even he had a hand in healing her soul.  Her spark had been rekindled; she had hope.  Her happiness was infectious.  He couldn’t imagine life without her.  And that was why he needed to see her before he left for work.

More determined than ever, he left the room and headed directly for the stairs.  Gavin had to know what was preventing her from keeping with her routine.  He knew how important it was for her to function.  He needed her consistency, her constancy.  Ascending the stairs as rapidly as he dared, he walked purposefully down the hall, pausing before the double doors. 

For some reason, he couldn’t even bring himself to knock on them to attract her attention.  So with one hand braced on either side of the doorframe, and his gaze trained on the floor, he called to her.  “Hannah?”  There was no response.  He was ready to panic.  “Hannah, just let me know you’re all right so that I can go to work.”  There was still no sound from the other side of the doors.  He straightened and moved his hands to hover just over the knobs.  He flexed his fingers, ready to grasp them and fling the doors wide. 

In the bathroom, Hannah sighed.
  She wasn’t ready to face anyone yet, especially him.  She could still hide her moods from the girls, but Gavin would see through her.  And once he realized that she was upset, it would only make it more difficult for her to concentrate and make it through her day.  Slowly, she practiced smiling.  And after a couple more tries, she had one that she thought might just be passable, and pasted it to her face.

Striding to the door, she opened just as Gavin was about to grasp the handles, forcing him to very nearly stumble into the room.  The sight was comical enough to force a true smile to her face.  He was quite sweet, for an overbearing overprotective jerk.  Just thinking that made her giggle.

Reassured that all was well in his world, Gavin beamed at her.  But his smile quickly faded as he realized just how attached he had become to this woman.  “Why didn’t you answer?”  He asked with a scowl.  “I thought something had happened to you.”  He folded his arms across his chest and frowned at her.

Smirking, she said, “Were you worried about me?”  She knew how to deflect and deflate. 

Bristling, he responded, “It’s just common courtesy to respond when someone speaks to you.”

Hannah laughed.  “You spend a lot of time lecturing me about ‘common courtesy.’  I had no idea I was so uncouth.”  She gazed up at him.  He clearly was unsure how to respond to that.  “Come on, you big crank.  I need my tea and you clearly need your coffee.”  And with that, she grabbed his hand and led him down the stairs to the keeping room.

At one that afternoon, Hannah found herself sitting in a crowded courtroom, waiting for her hearing to begin.
  There were men, women, and even some children from all walks of life in there.  Ah, court, the great equalizer.  There, everyone was the same.  She sighed.  Her phone had been vibrating repeatedly for the last ten minutes.  Glancing at who was trying to contact her, she sighed once more.  It was Gavin…again.  Maybe she should have told him where she was going.  Maybe he really needed her for some last minute errand.  Maybe he wanted to talk about dinner or check up on her.  It really didn’t matter.  She wouldn’t be able to respond to him until she left the courtroom.  As it was, a bailiff in the corner kept giving her angry eyes.  The phone was supposed to be turned off completely during court proceedings. 

Glancing across the room, she rolled her eyes heavenward.  As if the cell phone was the biggest infraction.  Across the courtroom and one row forward, Brett was sitting there with Krystal draped around his arm.  Who brought their mistress to their divorce proceedings?

After calling her five times, Gavin had given up.  He had worried about her periodically throughout the day and thought that calling her during his lunch break might cheer both of them up.  Instead, it had only heightened his anxiety.  She hadn’t answered.  She always answered.  And that’s what he counted on; hearing her playful tone through the phone always warmed him and fortified him for the remainder of his day.