Silken Desires (4 page)

Jonathan stood in the doorway watching Roxi
sleep. It had been two hours and he needed to check on her. That
meant waking her, giving him a good opportunity to speak. Walking
slowly across the room he couldn’t help but come to an abrupt stop
when he saw her open eyes staring at him. “Rox, you awake?”

“Jonathan? What are you doing here?” She
tried to sit up but grabbed her head instead. “Oww, my head hurts.
Bad
.”

“That’s why I’m here. You have a
concussion.” He eased over next to her and sat softly on the edge
of the bed.

“H-how did that happen?” She rolled over
onto her back letting her fingers trail down her face. “Ouch.”

“Your carry-on bag fell from the overhead
compartment in the plane, and your head took the brunt of it. You
shouldn’t have been taking it down yourself. You should’ve asked
for help.” He smoothed a hand along the blanket covering her side.
He shook his head and clenched his jaw in anger.

“Where were you? Weren’t you there? Why
didn’t you help me?” Her eyebrows pulled together and confusion
marked her face.

“That’s why you tried to get the bag on your
own. I wasn’t there. I should have been and I take full blame for
your accident. I’m sorry.” He lowered his head and looked away from
her.

She reached out and touched his arm. “Hey,
don’t stress over this. Other than a headache and a sore face, I’m
fine. I’m sure you had a good reason why you weren’t able to help
me.”

Here she thought the best of him, if it were
possible that only made him feel worse. “I didn’t have a good
reason, so you’d be good to hate me right now.”

“I don’t understand, Jonathan.”

He went on to explain the flight attendant
and how his dick reacted before his brain when it came to Linda,
and how he’d left her behind to go off with the new woman. She
didn’t respond to his comments. Instead she pulled the blankets
back and slowly raised from the bed, a little wobbly on her feet,
Jonathan grabbed her arm to steady her.

“I have to pee,” she announced.

He walked her to the toilet and stayed to be
sure she could handle it. She didn’t argue. Her face took on a
mindful expression, and her body stiffened, but she chose not to
speak. While washing her hands, her gaze caught his in the mirror.
He leaned against the wall behind her with his arms crossed over
his chest waiting for her to unleash on him.

Her gaze left his and she looked at herself.
Eyes widening, and mouth popping open, her wet hand went to her
face. “Oh my God!” She tilted her head to the side to get a better
look at her cheek, the whole side bruised, and swollen. “I look
awful,” she sobbed. “How come I don’t remember this?”

His defenses dropped and his heart sank, he
wasn’t anticipating that kind of reaction. Pushing off the wall he
embraced her from behind. Resting his chin gently on top of her
shoulder, he rocked her soothingly. “Shhhh, it’s gonna be okay.
It’s just a bruise and some swelling. There’ll be no scar or
anything.” He turned her around in his arms. “You’re beautiful no
matter what.” His fingers trailed down her good cheek.

Tears fell down her face. “I can’t
remember.” She nuzzled into the expanse of his chest and let him
hold her. It felt good, but he didn’t let down his guard. They
could never be anything more than friends again. At least now he
could consider being her friend, because when she’d returned back
home, he wanted nothing to do with her.

“It’s a side effect from the concussion. You
may never remember, or it could come back to you. No one knows, but
there isn’t much to remember. Besides it’s probably a memory you
don’t want.” He inhaled the scent of all that was her, and the
industrial odors of airplane and hospital. “Hey, are you up for a
shower or bath? I know you like to shower after traveling.”

“I’m so tired.”

“Another side effect. That’s why I’m staying
here for a few days until you get back on your feet. Shower?” He
verbalized it in a way that his staying with her wasn’t up for
conversation yet.

She sighed. “Bath.”

He sat her on the toilet lid, then leaned
over the tub and drew the bath. Knowing her almost as well as he
knew himself, he lifted a jar and sprinkled her favorite raspberry
scented bath crystals into the water. She sat on the closed toilet
waiting without looking away from the spout. “So you’re staying
here with me?” She asked it quietly, as if to test the
conversation.

“Yes. I’d like to look after you and take
care of you until you’re better. Is that okay?” He held his breath,
awaiting her response.

She nodded. “Only if you’re doing this
because you want to and not because you feel like you have to.”

He locked eyes with hers. “I want to.”

“Then stay.” She rose and removed her shirt
and bra.

He stopped her. “Let me. Bending over might
not feel good for your head.” He knelt and slipped her pants and
underwear from her waist. Something he’d done thousands of times
before, but this was the most gentle he’d ever treated her, and
there was nothing sexual about it.

He walked her to the tub and when she lifted
her foot she wobbled and grabbed hold of his forearm. “Maybe this
isn’t a good idea.” He patted her hand.

“No, I want to.” Roxi gave his arm a
reassuring squeeze, and then let go.

He pulled his shirt from over his head and
tossed it to the floor. Then he unbuttoned and unzipped his jeans.
Her fingers stroked at her throat while she watched. “The only way
you’re going in is if I help you.” He dropped his pants to the
floor and stepped out of them. Already barefoot, he stepped into
the tub and held a hand out to Roxi. It wasn’t awkward for him, and
it felt like the most natural thing to do.

They settled in the tub enveloped in the
fresh scent of raspberry bath suds. Roxi slid her body in between
his legs, and he pulled her back against his chest. Taking her body
wash and a washcloth, he began to bathe her. As he tended to her
back, he noticed thin lines of white scars. His heart pounded hard
against his rib cage while alarms sounded in his head. He knew
those marks; he’d seen them before in the club. He’d save that
inquiry for a time when she felt better. It was too deep of a
conversation to get into.

When he was done he reached for the handheld
sprayer and set the water to warm. “Lean your head back just a
little.” He wet her hair and gently massaged her shampoo in, and
rinsed it out. Then he used conditioner on her because he knew
without it, it would be difficult to brush through her thick head
of hair. She winced as he gently rubbed her scalp on the injured
side of her head, but she didn’t protest.

He towel dried them both, wrapped her in a
huge terrycloth robe, and then he put his clothes back on. “Blow
dry?”

She shook her head and picked up a hair
brush. She gasped and tears began to form on her lower lid as she
brushed through her hair, the brush skimming her bruised scalp. He
stood close by and watched until she finished.

Leaving the bathroom Roxi headed for the
bed. “No ma’am.” Placing his hand on her lower back he led her to
the dining area. “You should try to eat a little something. How’s
your stomach?”

She hesitated as if in thought. “I think
it’s all right.”

He made them toast with a little jam and a
hot cup of tea. He sat across from her at the dining room table and
ate while he watched her every move. She seemed to be doing well,
and his muscles eased up a little. He hadn’t realized he had been
so tense. His body ached despite the warm soak in the tub.

She stood and lifted her plate and cup.

“Here let me get that for you.” He rushed
over and relieved her of the dishes, and took them to the kitchen.
When he returned she was right where he left her. Her eyelids were
droopy with sleep and she yawned.

Jonathan took her hand. “Come let’s sit on
the couch and let your stomach settle before you take a nap.”

They settled in on the couch and the skin of
her arm brushed against his. She felt cold. He grabbed the throw
from nearby and covered them both with it. “TV?” he asked.

She reached up to touch her head, and
squinted. “No, I’d rather not.”

He repositioned them so he could put his
feet on the couch and he pulled her between his legs letting her
rest against his chest. “This is nice,” he murmured.

“Mmhmm.” She purred.

“Is there anything you need to get done in
the next few days?” He pulled the blanket tightly around her body.
“I cleared my schedule all week so I can run errands for you if
needed, but I’m not leaving you alone for a minute. Not until I
know that you’ll be fine. I checked your calendar and I don’t see
anything written down.”

“This week I planned on recouping after our
time in Vegas. I still haven’t found a job, and I told the temp
agency I was going away for Jake’s wedding. They pulled me from the
call list for the week.”

He reached over and righted a wayward hair
on her head and she purred. God how he loved that sound.

“Jonathan, I’m sleepy.” She looked at him
with tired, bloodshot eyes.

He held her tightly. “Go ahead baby, sleep.”
It didn’t take long; she conked out within minutes.

Any other night he would have been at the
club. With several clients scheduled for the week, he’d called work
and let them know what had happened. They told him to do what he
needed to care for Roxi, and to take his time coming back to work.
They knew Roxi at Underground Decadence, the BDSM club where
Jonathan and Jake worked nights, where she was considered part of
the family despite her personal feelings. She believed things like
kink were meant for the bedroom only, but wouldn’t criticize anyone
else for how they chose to live.

Feeling Roxi’s warmth and smelling her
freshly-bathed skin, his dick stirred as he thought about how their
bodies used to mold together. He allowed himself to remember a time
when the two of them got along, and they would cuddle on their
couch in the evenings discussing the day’s events.

As painful as it was to be in her life
again, he wouldn’t walk away from her when she needed help.
Squeezing his lids shut, he tried to ward off the tears that
threatened to come, but it was no use. Giving in to his feelings,
he let them flow, and cried silently to not wake Roxi. He loved her
as much as he did when they were kids, and just as much as a year
ago when she broke his heart. “Damn you, Roxi,” he whispered.

***

Tingling in his legs woke him. Looking
around the room at the clock, he saw that more than an hour and a
half had passed. “Shit.” Shifting slightly to get the blood flowing
in his legs again, he noticed Roxi’s eyes flutter, and then she
stirred between his legs. He stopped his efforts to allow her more
sleep.

He thought about it for a few seconds and
decided he needed up. He could no longer feel his feet and had to
move, the pins and needles feeling wasn’t far behind. “Roxi? My
feet are asleep I need to walk around.” She groaned at him, and he
laughed. “Come on sleeping beauty.” He pressed his legs together
into her sides to rouse her.

Her coppery brown eyes opened and closed
again. “Ugh. It’s too bright.” She squirmed, and he froze. Sporting
his wake-up wood, her body rubbed on it sending a different kind of
tingle through to the head of his dick. He inhaled a deep breath,
trying to think it away.

“Uh, Jonathan? What are you thinking about?”
She eyed his erection.

“Getting up, everything from the waist down
is asleep.”

“Not everything.” She sat up not removing
her gaze from the bulge between his legs.

“That’s not for you. I fell asleep and just
woke up.”

“Oh.” She furrowed her brow.

***

Roxi wasn’t sure if she should be
disappointed or not. She felt a thrill run through her body at the
feel of his hard cock pressed against her, but it wasn’t for her.
He made that painfully clear. What a letdown; he had a great dick
and knew how to use it. For some reason, her libido spiked, and her
mind raced in frustration.

Jonathan stood and shook each leg in turn to
try to wake them. He had fallen asleep with her on the couch. What
did that mean?
He has to still care for me. He’s being so
thoughtful and considerate.

When his cell phone lit up and jingled a
tune, they both looked across the room to the dining room table.
Going to answer it, he paused and looked at Roxi. “Stay there.”

He strolled to his phone and she couldn’t
help but take in his slightly muscular body moving beneath his
shirt. He wasn’t much for anything but running, and yet he had
contoured muscles in just the right places. He never went to the
gym or worked out with weights. Running had always been his thing,
and clearly it paid off.

Jonathan picked up his phone and scrunched
his face. “Hello?” She could tell he didn’t know the caller.
Recognition hit as his eyes widened and huge smile took over his
lips. “Oh, Linda! Hello. Sorry, I meant to call you. I just woke
from a nap…” His voice trailed off as he walked to the bedroom.
Before closing the door behind him, he glanced at Roxi for a
moment. Giving her a small smile he then closed the door.

“Linda.” Roxi tested the name. Unable to
recall anyone by that name, she soon felt guilty. Had she been
keeping him from his girlfriend? Standing up from the couch, her
head and cheek throbbed. The pain wasn’t as bad as earlier. Either
she was on the mend or the meds the doctor prescribed were
working.

In the kitchen, she filled a glass with
water at the sink and drank it down. Spotting a bright red apple,
she picked it up, and took a huge bite of the juicy fruit. “Mmmm,
this is so good.” After a few bites she set it down and began to
unload the dishwasher.