Snakes in Suits: When Psychopaths Go to Work (39 page)

The team proceeded to count the money, and Ellyn made a note in her ledger book. “I say we hit Midtown early evening tomorrow,”

she suggested. “There’s a three-day convention in town.”

They laughed as Mom picked up the neat pile of money and placed it in a shoebox. Ellyn headed to the stove to begin cooking dinner, and Mark got another beer from the fridge.

Because of recent publicity about our work on psychopaths, we have received many questions from the public about how to handle them
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in the workplace. Most questions have to do with handling a “psychopathic” boss, but we have also heard about psychopathic peers, subordinates, and coworkers. Without a lot more information than we typically receive, it is impossible to determine whether the individual described is psychopathic. Recall that psychopathy refers to a potent mix of personality traits and behavioral patterns (see chapter 2), and that a proper assessment is made only by qualified professionals.

We therefore strongly advise readers to be very careful about their use of the term, particularly in discussions with others. However, if you are working for or with an individual who appears to have psychopathic features, we offer some suggestions in this chapter.

It is important to understand that psychopaths derail your career by attacking the two most important aspects of your reputation: your competence and your loyalty. Competence is how well you do your job or the tasks assigned to you. It is the basic reason you have a job in the first place. While your ability to perform a task suits their purpose (that is, you are considered a pawn or patron in support of their psychopathic fiction), psychopaths will continue to charm and groom you to support them. They may use unorthodox tactics (as they tend not to have good leadership skills), but you have value to them (albeit temporary), so your competence does not pose a direct threat.

Loyalty is an intangible trait that is often measured in terms of how supportive you are of the company and, conversely, how supportive the company is of its employees. Companies begin to build loyalty during recruitment and orientation by describing the successes the company has achieved and the opportunities afforded those who wish to build a career with the company. The company maintains loyalty by increasing feelings of company pride (such as when the company celebrates a major success in the marketplace); feelings of personal belongingness (through things like team achievement awards and company picnics); opportunities for personal and professional growth (such as through company-sponsored training programs and challenging assignments); or career advancement (as in
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salary increases, promotions, and achievement bonuses). For the employee’s part, loyalty to the company is demonstrated through productivity, quality output, regular attendance, adherence to policies and procedures, and an above-and-beyond effort on behalf of the work unit and company, and so forth.

Once you are no longer of use to the psychopath or you pose a threat to him, he will discard you and attempt to overtly and covertly neutralize you in the eyes of upper management, coworkers, or anyone else who has influence. If a psychopath sees you as too competent (that is, a rival) or senses any hint of disloyalty on your part, you may be attacked. The attacks involve disparaging the perceptions of your competence and loyalty in the eyes of others in the company, particularly members of upper management.

Recall that perceptions of you by those in power—that is, your reputation—are based on the impressions you make. However, if you do not have ready access to those in power (for example, through participation in meetings or by making presentations to upper management), your reputation in their eyes can only be based on reports from others, primarily your boss. If your boss is a psychopath, then the odds are good that he or she has been spreading negative information about you.

Industrial psychopaths, be they manipulators, bullies, or puppetmasters, operate best in secret, so your reputation can be destroyed without your even being aware that anyone has doubts about your competence and loyalty. This puts you at a clear disadvantage. Should you try to complain about your psychopathic coworker or boss, you may very likely find that the waters have been poisoned against you, and every effort you make to remedy the situation may be seen as confirmation of the “problem employee” reputation that you now have.

Once you have lost your credibility, you are essentially defenseless against the psychopath, short of taking legal action, which in many cases is a very costly, uphill battle. It is therefore incumbent on you to take preventative measures to assure that your competence and loyalty are never questioned.

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Rule 1: Do Not Label Anyone a “Psychopath”

As noted earlier, it is not useful to label someone a psychopath; in fact, to label your boss a psychopath may make the situation worse for you than it already is. Even if you have reviewed all the traits of the psychopath and believe your boss or coworker demonstrates them, your company may not be in a position to take your side.

Companies are very pragmatic and respond to information about behaviors relevant to the work at hand rather than subjective feelings about another person.

Rule 2: Build and Maintain Relationships
One psychopathic technique is to create conflict among staff members. Claiming that one person said something negative or deroga-tory about another is a common approach. The success of this approach relies on the tendency for individuals to avoid confronting others who they think have spoken ill of them. This “divide and control” technique increases tension and distrust among individuals, effectively shutting down communication and providing cover for the psychopath. A psychopathic boss can use this technique to control and isolate employees from each other and to hide his or her abusive behavior.

The best defense is to take every opportunity to interact with others on the job and develop a reputation as a friendly, talented, competent, and loyal person. Seek out opportunities to interact with members of upper management. While they may not routinely visit your workplace, their occasional appearances allow them brief chances to mingle with employees. Unfortunately, many such meetings end up like elementary school dances (no one asks anyone to dance) or “bitch” sessions (someone starts complaining and others join in).

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You can take advantage of these occasional meetings by coming prepared with a serious question that is not embarrassing, confronta-tional, or self-serving. Ask a question about the business, the competition, or a new product line. The more maturity and practical understanding of business you demonstrate by your question, the more favorably the executives will remember you.

In addition, you should also always be prepared with what is referred to in business language as an “elevator speech” to use with any member of higher management you happen to meet. Assume you have 30 seconds in an elevator alone with an executive. Luckily, people often don’t talk to each other in an elevator. Take this opportunity to introduce yourself to the executive (this shows initiative and a willingness to interact with people above you) and give your one-sentence talk (tell him or her what you do; comment on the business, the latest annual report, or the new office construction; and thank the executive for something, even just for visiting the site). Here is an example of a real elevator speech: “Hi, Mr. Johnson, I’m John Smith, I work in the lab on the ABC project. I really liked what you said in the latest annual report about the investment the company is making. Thanks. We appreciate your support for the project.” You will be surprised at the positive reaction you receive. If you are asked questions, give brief, fact-based answers. Many executives rely on the im-promptu input from employees for information they cannot get elsewhere. As this is your first meeting, always make it positive and supportive; avoid anything that may be embarrassing (to you, the company, or the executive), but be sincere. And, if your executive is like many we have known, he or she will remember your name and where you work. This can only help your career; it communicates competence and loyalty to someone who really matters.

Of course, this is also precisely what a psychopath would do!

The difference is that the psychopath’s intent is malevolent, while yours is to genuinely get along and fit in.

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Rule 3: Understand Options

Your Company May Offer

If you have not read your company policy manual, then do so. Many companies distribute copies to their staff and may even offer orientation programs to answer questions. Be familiar with your obligations to the company, as well as any policies or procedures in place to handle complaints and issues. For example, many American companies have policies against sexual harassment. Some have anti-bullying provisions that you should also note. Do not be afraid to ask questions about policies and procedures you do not understand.

Rule 4: Avoid Being Labeled a Complainer
Nobody likes someone who is always complaining. Reserve your complaints for something that is important to you. Learn how to pick your battles and, more important, learn how to rephrase your issues positively. A reputation as a complainer hurts your long-term credibility and plays nicely into the hands of the psychopath who merely has to reinforce what others already think about you.

How to Handle a “Psychopathic” Boss
One of the most debilitating things for your personal and professional life is to work for a psychopathic boss. He or she can make your life hell. Unfortunately, companies are filled with bosses who are unschooled in the management and supervisory techniques needed to effectively lead their departments or teams; these individuals can look and act like psychopaths, but in reality they are not. The real deal is much worse. Here are our thoughts on how to make the best of your situation should you have the misfortune of working for a real psychopath.

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1. BUILD AND MAINTAIN A REPUTATION AS

A GOOD PERFORMER

Bosses are expected to use power, influence, and leadership to motivate employees to perform their jobs up to specific standards of quality and productivity. While there may be differences in personal style and mismatch between your expectations and your boss’s approach, the company is expected to take the side of your boss in most disagreements over your performance. This fact alone makes it very difficult to handle a boss with psychopathic tendencies, because he or she already has more power than you do and is expected to make management judgments about you, your performance, and your career. In the hands of a psychopathic boss, your own less-than-optimal performance is a tool that can (and will) be used against you.

The best defense is to always perform up to your capabilities and do whatever tasks are assigned to you unless they are clearly illegal, unethical, or violate safety or security procedures. In addition, be open to regular feedback about your performance, and ask for feedback on a regular basis if it is not forthcoming.

2. PUT IT IN WRITING

In many, but not all, companies, assignments and objectives are given in writing. If this is not the case where you work, then you can always follow up each verbal directive with a written memo of your understanding. This memo should be short, well written, and focused. Simply state what you understand the assignment to be, the timetable, resource requirements, and assistance you expect from the boss or others working on the project. If possible, ask to meet with your boss to review it, take notes, and, of course, keep a copy of all documents for yourself. If you make this a regular part of your interactions with all your bosses—that is, part of your style of working—

upper management will readily understand and accept it; in fact, it is a sign of a mature, well-motivated employee.

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Sometimes objectives are open to negotiation, and you should take advantage of these opportunities. If an assignment is too big or your current assignments need to be reprioritized in order to complete the additional work in a timely manner, then ask to meet with your boss to discuss how this can be accomplished. Always come to these meetings with several solutions of your own; this demonstrates initiative and the fact that you seriously want to achieve the same results your boss does. You may not always get your way, but the key is to build a good working relationship with your boss, whether you think he or she is a psychopath or not.

You should document other things as well. For example, any positive or negative feedback you receive from your boss should be noted in your calendar or date book. A simple note that documents the meeting, what was said, and your response should be sufficient.

Any threats your boss makes should be noted either in your date book or a “memo to file,” which you should keep (more on this later).

3. MAKE GOOD USE OF YOUR

PERFORMANCE APPRAISAL

Many supervisors do not like writing or giving performance appraisals. Some find them time consuming (especially if the supervisor has many employees to review); others find them hard to write properly; and still others do not like to give negative feedback to their staff members, even if it is valid. Because the performance review becomes a part of your record, what is written down on this document is very critical to your career. Unscrupulous bosses can use the review as a way to derail your career by including inaccuracies and distortions; take the process seriously and try to participate as much as possible.

To facilitate the review process, some companies allow employees to submit information to the supervisor—a self-assessment—to be used as notes as they write the review. While no supervisor is required to accept this self-report of performance, it does help many supervisors to remember details they might have forgotten and may enlighten
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