Something Worth Fighting For (15 page)

“It’s kind of a lot to take in.” I shrugged not sure what else to say as he took up pacing again.

“Baby I don’t have the words. You are the most selfless person I have ever met. You tell me this then check on me. I should be...hell, I don’t know what I should be doing. I have never been so hurt, upset, enraged, or more in awe of a person in my life. I want to rip that fucker limb for limb, videotape it, and send it to his family every year for Christmas.”

“As appealing as that sounds I prefer you out of prison. I’m really not into conjugal visits.” I gave him a half hearted smile.

“How can you joke? How do you go day to day being this happy girl? I just don’t... I don’t think I could.”

“You’re a pretty good reason to be happy again. I look at you and you make me want to be better, to live again. You’re the only person I’ve ever really let in since. You help to make it better. Just because my world stopped doesn’t mean the entire world did.”

This stopped Atlas in his tracks and he was across the room in three steps. Pulling me up into his arms, lifting me off of the bed. I squeaked causing him to finally crack a smile. “I’ve got you,” he cooed as he sat down, lying back on the bed, never letting me go.

“He is the reason why you told me I deserve better isn’t it?” Atlas voice finally broke our silence.

“Yes.”

“I hate him. God hate doesn’t even seem a strong enough word. Despise, loathe, detest, there just isn’t one.” Atlas’ hands were running a path up and down my sides. A man that wanted nothing more than to fly off into a murderous rage was soothing me.

“I don’t want this to change how you see me.” I confessed with a shaky breath. “I don’t want you to think that I’m fucked up or damaged or something.”

“Penelope Noelle,” Atlas scowled, “The only thing that has changed between us is that I am completely amazed by your strength and perseverance. I thought you were awesome before but you are just an incredible woman.” He used his index finger to tilt my face toward him. “I want to prove to you how good love can be, and one day I want to show you. I will be a lucky man to spend the rest of my life proving this to you.” He leaned up kissing my trembling lips. “I want to marry you, Ellie. I’ve wanted to since the first time I saw you in the diner.”

I closed my heavy eyes, laying my head on his hard chest. Listening to his breathing, his heartbeat, the window blowing outside the double french doors of his bedroom. “Atlas?”

“Yeah, baby?”

“Earlier, when we came back inside?”

“Yeah?”

“Will you carry me like that when we get married?”

Atlas chuckled, a deep sound, echoing through his chest. “Ginger, I would carry you everywhere like that if you wanted. Wait, was that you saying yes?”

“Not yet Cowboy, not yet.”

❋❋❋

Scream.

Scream.

Scream.

“Ellie, baby, you’re okay, I’ve got you.” Atlas voice was in my ear, his strong arms wrapped around me, holding me like a vise.

“Atlas! Atlas open the door!” Andy was pounding on the door as I covered my ears trying to focus on my breathing. Atlas reached over flipping the lock on the doorknob.

“She’s okay, just a bad dream.” He rubbed my back as I gasped for air. “Breathe Ellie.” He whispered.

Andy came around the other side crawling right up in the bed with us. “You okay, sweetie, Need anything?” She ran her hand over my hair, her maternal instinct kicking in.

“I’ll be okay.” I nodded slowly, clinging to Atlas.

“Want to get up?” He asked knowing I wouldn’t want to go back to sleep right away. He had spent many mornings on the phone talking or texting with me when I couldn’t sleep.

“Yeah.”

“I’ll go make you kids something to drink.” Andy gave my arm a small squeeze then excused herself.

“God that’s embarrassing.” I groaned, rubbing my face against Atlas’ bare chest.

“You have PTSD, you have nothing to be embarrassed about.” Atlas watched me get out of bed and dig through my bag. I changed into his sweats and his favorite shirt as he pulled on his own would be pajamas. With his hand in mine he led me down the dark hallway into the living room.

“I made you two some cocoa. I think I’ll go back to bed.” Andy kissed Atlas on the cheek. “If you need anything...”

“Yeah, thanks Ma.” Atlas gave her a tired smile, she returned his look, mixed with worry and pity. Atlas picked up the miss matched mugs off the counter. “Want to go outside?”

“Sure,” I grabbed a blanket off the back of the couch follow him out. The sun was starting to peek over the horizon, banishing the dark sky for another day. We sat on a worn red couch in the corner laying the blanket over our laps. Atlas gave me a mug, wrapping his arm around my shoulder. There wasn’t a need to talk about it. He knew what had happened and now what my dreams were all about.

The sun came up as beautiful as it had set. Atlas’ hand rested on my shoulder, rubbing small circles with his calloused thumb. “I think I’m going to go see him.” His voice broke our silence.

“Your Dad?”

“Yeah. Ares, when we talked last night, he went and saw him. He asked about me but Ari wouldn’t tell him anything. I only want to go if you’ll come with me.”

“Are you sure?”

“I’ll flake out if I go by myself. I want so bad for him to be proud of me.” It was a confession that made my heart hurt.

“He’d be an idiot not to be the proudest father on the planet.”

“I’m afraid I’ll turn out like him.” 

“Atlas look at me,” I was staring up at the stubble along his jaw. His blue eyes found mine. “You are going to be an amazing father when we have children. Want to know how I know?” He nodded slowly. “Because that child is a piece of me. I know you would never do anything to hurt me, and hurting our child would hurt me.”

Relief flooded his tired face. “You’re right, I wouldn’t do that.”

“When do you want to go?” I hid my cold face in his side.

“Soon, we have other things to do today.”

“We do?”

“Yup,” he popped the P, smiling.

“Like?”

“First we’re going Thanksgiving shopping with Ma, then I’m taking you on a date tonight.”

“A date, huh?”

“Yes ma’am.”

“I like the sound of that.”

“Good, lets go get dressed.”

❋❋❋

Felix Ryker’s house was something impressive. A white brick, gated entrance, party deck, boat dock, it was the ultimate bachelor pad. Atlas hit the buzzer and the gate swung open slowly. He looked nervous and secretly my own stomach was in knots.

I had worn the dress I packed for Thanksgiving, picking at the hem as he pulled to a stop in the circle drive. “Have I told you how incredibly handsome you look in your Blues?”

“Thank you, Ginger. Not only for the compliment but for coming.”

“Nowhere else I’d rather be.”

With that Atlas jumped out of the truck and came around helping me down. Hand in hand, his gripping mine tightly as he knocked. I was holding my breath, we could see the shadow of a man approach.

“Oh hey, I already made a donation but I’m sure I can find something for you, just let me get my wallet.” Felix Ryker was shorter than his son with a head full of gray hair. They shared the same sculpted lips, rounded nose, and strong jaw.

“Um... No.. I.. Hi Dad.” Atlas lifted his hat off exposing more of his face.

“Holy sh-- Atlas?” Felix’s mouth fell open. “You... Wow.” He took a step back examining his eldest son. “Please, come in.” He held the door open as we stepped through the threshold.

“This is my girlfriend, Ellie, Ellie this is my father, Felix.” Atlas spat his name out as his jaw tensed.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you Mr. Ryker.” I smiled as politely as I could muster given Atlas’ anger.

“The pleasure is mine. Wow, Atlas, you’re a Marine.” He was staring at Atlas like he was a foreign object.

“Yes, I am.”

“Can we go talk?”

“That’s why we’re here. Ari said you wanted to see me.”

“Right, this way,” we followed him into a dark wood living room, sitting on a contrasting tan leather couch. “How long are you here?”

“Until Sunday.”

“Where are you stationed?”

“Camp Lejeune, North Carolina.”

“What do you do, your rank?”

“I’m a Sergeant, looking for a promotion when I get back from my next deployment. I’m a sniper.” The corner of Atlas’ lip twitched as if he wanted to smile.

“Sniper, wow,” Felix rubbed his hands together, “Deployed again?”

“Fourth time, hopefully last but I’m not holding my breath.” He squeezed my hand.

“Girlfriend, huh?” Felix smiled at me.

“Yes sir,” I smiled, leaning into Atlas.

“What do you do?”

“I’m finishing my bachelor’s in social work and music. I work at a little diner in town. Nothing fancy but it keeps me busy.”

“Very good. Do you live in North Carolina?”

“Yes sir. My father is stationed at Lejeune. I moved in with him after high school.”

“Oh, your father is enlisted?”

“Yes sir, close to thirty years with the Marines. Both of my brothers are as well.”

“Military brat, seems good for you, son.” Atlas cringed at the word son.

“Can we cut the bullshit? Why did you want to see me? After all this time what makes you think you have a goddamn right? Acting like you care. You didn’t even recognize me!” Atlas lashed out at Felix.

“Atlas...” I put my hand on his thigh trying to calm him down.

“No he has every right to be mad.” Felix nodded somberly.” I screwed up, I know I did. I was selfish, stupid, a total asshole. I cared more about myself and there are no excuses. I just want to make it right. I want a second chance.”

“A second chance?” Atlas sneered. “What make you think--”

“You’re a grown man, Atlas. I know you don’t need a father but damn, I still need my sons.”

“You didn’t need us then.” Atlas shot back.

“I deserve that,” Felix bowed his head, “I”m just asking for a chance here, Atlas.”

Atlas sat brooding, running his hand over his face, something I had seen his father do earlier. They obviously shared more than just their facial features, their mannerisms were similar. He looked at me with his mouth screwed to the side, his blue eyes intense, pained. “Can I talk to Atlas for a moment, sir?”

Without a word Felix stood up and left the room. “Oh baby, I know you’re pissed off.” I cupped my small hands around his face. “You want to make him proud? Let him see the honorable, courageous man you are. Let him see the man I fell in love with.” I leaned forward brushing my lips against his. “Show him that you are compassionate and you know forgiveness. That you are a better man because of what he did. Prove to him that you didn’t need his influence to become who you are. But give him a chance to prove to you that he might not be the same man he was either. You never know, he might be capable of change, I was.”

“You’re right. You’re always right.”

“Not always but at least ninety-nine percent of the time.” I beamed at him as he gave me a simple smile. “Go tell him, bring him back in here.”

“Dad?” Atlas called out to him as Felix poked his head around the corner. “Eavesdropping?”

“Maybe a little.” Felix acquiesced.

“Figured.”

“Would you two like to come for Thanksgiving?” Felix asked hopeful.

“We’re going to be at Ma’s.”

“How is Dromy?” Felix sat back down in the chair across from us.

“She’s good; successful, happy, constantly worried.”

“Nothing new there.” Felix looked amused.

“Where will you be?” Atlas asked hesitantly.

“Here, your grandparents are coming over, my sister and her kids, not sure if Caspian and Dante are coming.”

“Maybe we can stop by that afternoon?” Atlas looked over to his father as Felix’s warm mocha eyes widened along with his smile.

“I would love that, Atlas.” Atlas just nodded, pressing his lips together as he looked around the room. I gave him a reassuring smile. “So, how about a tour?” He finally asked.

“Sure,” We all stood up, Atlas’ hand one the small of my back. “How did you two meet?” He led us through to the patio complete with outdoor kitchen.

“Atlas?” I giggled, nudging him.

“I went into the diner she works at, dog ass tired for fifteen straight days until she noticed me.”

“Oh please! It was like two and three in the morning, you were the only person there. How could I not notice you?” I gave him a serious look but couldn’t stop from cracking up as Felix did.

“Okay until I got the balls to actually talk to her. She made me go ask her father if I could have a date with her. Which was almost a deal breaker when I found out who he was. I was scared shitless. He rather reluctantly agreed and I’ve been bothering her ever since.”