Read Stand Strong: You Can Overcome Bullying (and Other Stuff That Keeps You Down) Online
Authors: Nick Vujicic
Stand Strong: You Can Overcome Bullying (and Other Stuff That Keeps You Down) (2 page)
It didn’t help that my family moved a couple of times when I was in school. We went from one side of Australia to the other, then we moved to the United States and back again. At each new school, I wasn’t just the only kid with no arms and no legs; I was usually the only kid in a wheelchair. When we moved to the United States, I hit the bully-target trifecta: I was the only
kid in my school with no arms and no legs, the only kid in a wheelchair,
and
the only kid with an Australian accent!
Different?
Me, mate?
Sure, I stood out from the crowd, and the fact that I was often the new kid without friends made me an even easier target. But I realized early on that bullies would find a reason to pick on anyone. They called the smart kids “nerds,” the tall kids “bird legs,” and the short kids “runts.” If perfect people existed, bullies probably would mock them for being “too perfect.”
Still, if you are being bullied, it hurts. It’s a terrible experience that often seems like it will never end. As someone who endured it throughout my teenage years and still runs into it from time to time, I want to give you hope and peace. You can rise above and beyond it.
R
ISING
A
BOVE
God put you on this earth because He loves you and He has a plan for you. With His help and the guidance offered in this book, you will be able to put your bullies in their proper place so their taunts and shunning won’t matter to you. My experience proves that anyone can rise above bullying and have a ridiculously wonderful life. I know you can do the same.
To help you begin, I want to plant a thought in your brain. This is blatant mind control, of course; so if you want to block
it, go ahead and put tinfoil around your head. (It will look silly, but that’s okay with me if it’s okay with you.) The thought I want you to consider is that while being bullied is an awful thing to go through, it can also be a great opportunity.
I know what you are thinking:
Nick must have been kicked in the head by a kangaroo!
No, it was a wallaby. But aside from that, I believe you can turn your evil bully into a source for good in your life. Instead of letting your antagonist drive you nuts, depress you, dog your every thought, ruin your sleep, and stomp all over your dreams, why not turn the tables?
While being bullied is an awful thing to go through, it can also be a great opportunity.
Bullies want to abuse you. Instead of allowing that, you can use them as your personal motivators. Power up and let the bully eat your dust. In the pages that follow, I will help you build your antibully antibodies. This is a process that works by building strength from the inside out, from your deepest thoughts and feelings—your heart and soul—to the way you see the world, make decisions, and take actions. You build your bully defense system from the inside out by
1. figuring out who you are so no bully can tell you differently or make you feel badly;
2. taking responsibility for your own behavior and happiness so bullies have no ultimate power over you;
3. establishing strong values that no bully can shake;
4. creating a safety zone within yourself where you can go mentally to draw strength and comfort;
5. building strong and supportive relationships to stand up for you against bullies;
6. learning to monitor and manage your responses to the emotions triggered by bullying;
7. developing a spiritual foundation to help you be at peace and be strong against bullying;
8. taking the opportunity to learn from your bullying experience so that you can become stronger, wiser, more confident, more faith filled, and more prepared to handle any challenges;
9. creating your bully defense strategy so you are prepared to handle bullies of all kinds; and
10. mastering empathy so you are aware of the needs of others and serve them whenever possible to help them overcome bullying.
Once all those things are in place, you will have your own bully defense system. Then you can join me in working to eradicate the epidemic of bullying so no one else has to suffer. Together, with God’s help, we can bring an end to the bullying epidemic.
Too often people who are bullied become bullies themselves. It’s a vicious cycle, and one of my goals in writing this book is to break it by first helping you so you can then help me and all the others around the globe dedicated to ridding the world of bullying.
We can do this. We can band together and make this a bully-free world. In 2012, I visited a school in Hawaii to talk about bullying. About a year later, the headmaster sent me a letter saying that my visit had changed the school. He said they did not have a single instance of bullying for an entire year after I talked to the students!
You are taking the first step in joining this campaign by reading this book. Please, when you are done, pass it on to others. Share what you’ve learned from it with your siblings, friends, parents, teachers, and anyone else you think might benefit.
If you are a teen and you are overwhelmed by bullying in any form, this book will help you understand that the game bullies play is designed to make you feel bad so they can feel superior. Refuse to play that game. Instead, believe those who love you when we say you matter to us and to your Creator. You are a child of God, created in His image. You are beautiful. You are the perfectly unique
you
.
That doesn’t mean you are flawless, but that’s the beauty of it. We are all perfect and imperfect at the same time. God
designed us this way because there is beauty in both, and purpose too.
After reading this book, you will be able to make the following statements with confidence and clarity:
• Bullies can’t hurt me or define me because I have defined myself. I know who I am and where I am going.
• I don’t give anyone else the power to make me feel badly. I take responsibility for my own happiness.
• My values are unshakable. I have a plan for my life guided by them.
• My strength comes from within, and no bully can make me feel insecure.
• I know my family and friends will always stand up for me, just as I will for them.
• I am aware of my emotions, especially anger and fear, and I control my response to them so that I stay positive in my thoughts and actions.
• My spiritual life is strong and empowering. I know I was created for a purpose and I am loved unconditionally. Where I am weak, my Creator is strong.
• I find something positive to take away from every challenge, including being bullied.
• I reach out to help others at every opportunity, especially those who are being bullied in any way.
Together we will build your bully defense system. You will feel stronger than you’ve ever felt, and you will be better prepared to face all the challenges life might throw at you.
I love you.
Nick’s Notes for Chapter One
Bullying is a global epidemic. So if you are being bullied, you are not alone—and there is plenty of help available.
When a bully picks on you, it isn’t about you or any flaws you might have; it’s about the bully’s own issues. So try not to take it personally.
There is no single infallible strategy for dealing with each and every bully. Your best bet is to work on building strength from within and strategies for every scenario you might face.
If a bully attacks you, defend yourself but get away as fast as you can. If you have any reason to think a bully is going to harm you physically, you need to talk to an adult who can help you before that happens.
The dude was drunk as a skunk. My wife and I were swimming in a resort pool on a road trip. He kept staring at me. At first I couldn’t hear what he was saying because his speech was slurred, but I knew it was something bad.
As he got closer, my fears were confirmed. He pointed at my little foot as I sat on the edge of the pool. He said crude things about my foot and my body. Then he badgered me with obnoxious questions intended to embarrass and belittle me.
Mostly he made a fool of himself. He didn’t need my help doing that, so I kept quiet and let him wear himself out. After a few minutes, he stumbled into the hotel. I prayed for him. I really did. I prayed for him to walk full speed into a closed glass door! (Just kidding. Maybe.)