Star Crossed (Starlight #3) (7 page)

‘I…’ I swallow, searching for the words. His fingers slip to the clamps, and another surge of sensation electrifies my breasts.

‘
Fuck me hard,’ I gasp, the words tumbling out.

‘
That’s what I thought,’ he murmurs with satisfaction. ‘I’m tempted to fuck your ass again. But your pussy looks so tempting from this angle, that I’m going to take you there.’

I feel him angle his hips, toying with me. Then his hardness rests against me.

‘Fuck me,’ I beg, overwhelmed with lust now.

Adam gives a little groan of desire and
then he’s deep inside me. The sudden thickness of him filling me up, is exquisite. I moan as he starts working my body.

God he’s good. He’s so good.

I give myself up to the tumult of pleasure. There is nothing but my body and his. His hips pounding against me, and his hands locking my body in position.

I lean forward, so the weight of my body rests on my wrists, and my behind lifts up higher towards him. I want him deep and hard, and I need to make sure he knows it.

‘Spank me,’ I gasp, as his thrusts come stronger.

Whoa.
Where did that come from!

Adam’s hand rests on my behind as he moves into me, caressing, teasing. Then it slams hard into my ass.

I gasp at the tight contact of skin on skin. He does it again, spanking me as he takes me from behind. The feeling of it all is so deliciously dirty. It’s such an illicit thing to be doing. But I’m loving this.

Adam spanks me again, and then his other hand slides underneath me, teasing my clitoris.

Oh God!

I feel myself start to orgasm almost immediately. And as I contract around his thrusts, Adam spanks my ass again, harder this time. It takes me to another level, and I cry out as I explode with pleasure against him.

I’m driving my ass back tight into him, and he takes my hips securely in both hands, and climaxes hard inside me.

I breathe out hard, sagging against my bound wrists, and panting at the waves of sensation still radiating through me.

Adam slides his hands along my back and gently unfastens my bindings.

‘
Did you like that?’ he whispers into my ear.

I nod, still pole
-axed from the strength of my orgasm.

‘
Yes,’ I breathe. ‘That was incredible.’

He turns me around, so I can see him smiling, and kisses my mouth.

‘Good,’ he says. ‘For me too.’

Adam folds me carefully in his arms and draws me back onto the double bed.

As I look up I realise I had completely forgotten where we were.

The stars are an endless sparking carpet above us.

But now there’s something else too.

‘
Adam!’ I gasp. ‘Look! It’s the northern lights!’

‘
So it is,’ he breathes in wonder.

The aurora borealis is simply incredible.
A deep-coloured curtain of green and pink, waving across the sky. It feels like a blessing.

I sigh out in amazement.

‘Thank you so much for bringing me here,’ I say. ‘It’s the most incredible place I’ve ever been.’

‘
You know,’ says Adam, smiling, ‘The Japanese believe, that lovers who sleep beneath the northern lights, will live happily ever after.’

I turn to him on the bed.

‘They do?’ I ask.

‘
That’s one of the reasons we have so many weddings here,’ says Adam. ‘It’s good luck for a couple to see them.’

I consider this.

‘So this is good luck for us?’ I ask.

‘
I think so,’ says Adam. ‘Although I hardly need a sign from above with you Summer. You’re my thunderbolt. Remember?’

I feel tears rise up.
His thunderbolt.
He sang that as a song for me, and it was so beautiful.

Adam’s gaze shifts up to the carpet of northern lights, and the stars above us.

Gently he takes my hand.

‘
See those stars there?’ he asks, guiding my finger to point. ‘That’s Lyra and Aquila. The lovers.’

I follow where he’s mapping my finger, and make out two bright stars.

‘Lyra was a heavenly maiden, who came to earth to bathe in a special river,’ continues Adam. ‘And Aquila was a farmer boy, tending his ox on the river bank. He fell in love with Lyra, and stole her heavenly cloak, so she couldn’t return to heaven, and had to stay and marry him.’

I smile at the story.

‘That seems like an extreme way to tell a girl you like her,’ I say. ‘Were they happy together?’

Adam closes his fingers over mine.

‘Oh yes,’ he says. ‘They were very happy, and had many children together.’

He turns to me.
‘The story reminds me of you,’ he says. ‘You’re my angel from heaven. I don’t know how I’ve done it, but I’ve managed to keep you here. For now at least.’

His eyes cloud over slightly.

‘Stop that,’ I say firmly. ‘I’m not an angel Adam. I’m just a girl who’s deeply in love with you.’

I take his head and turn it towards me.

‘You have to stop thinking you’re undeserving.’ I press. ‘I’m with you because I love you. Ok?’

There’s something so vulnerable in his
eyes, that I lean forward to kiss him.

‘
Adam,’ I say, ‘I love you.’

He smiles.
‘Sometimes I worry that I don’t deserve you.’

His past again.

‘Whatever it is, that you think I can’t accept about you,’ I say slowly, ‘I can. I will. That’s what love is all about.’

He pulls me close.

‘Thank you,’ he says, ‘for loving me.’

We stare deep into each other
’s eyes for a long moment, drinking one another in. I feel like I could stay here forever, beneath these beautiful stars and lights.

In the magic of this moment together I have a surge of inspiration. I want to capture how I feel about Adam in a song. I don’t know if I can do it. The feelings I have are so powerful. But I’d like to try.

‘I’d like to write you a song too,’ I whisper.

Adam smiles at me, his eyes full of love.

‘Maybe one day,’ he says. ‘I’d love to hear it.’

‘
No,’ I say. ‘Not one day. Now. I’d like it to be my competition song.’

He frowns slightly.

‘Do you think that’s a good idea?’

‘
Probably not,’ I admit. ‘It’s ambitious. But I feel like a different song writer is emerging. And I don’t want to play it safe. I want to shoot for the stars,’ I add, smiling at the analogy.

Adam gives a little laugh.

‘It’s one of the things I admire most about you,’ he says. ‘Your bravery.’

‘
Then you’ll help me?’ I press. ‘With the song. I don’t think I’ll be able to do it without your help.’

He nods slowly.

‘I’ll help,’ he says. ‘But only if you’re really sure. What you’re suggesting… You’ll be giving a lot of yourself.’

I nod.
‘I know. I’ve only ever sung about past relationships before. This would be really different. But I think it could be good.’

I relax back into his arms, staring up at the incredible
starscape.

Some ideas have already started floating through my head.
About how he makes me feel.

When I’m with Adam, I am more naked than I’ve ever been before.
But in a good way. I play around with lyrics and harmonies, trying to fit this to music.

And before I know it, I’ve fallen into a deep sleep.

Chapter
8

The next morning, the northern lights have been replaced by a bright frozen sky. We spend an hour luxuriating in indulgent love-making, relishing our time together. With the competition finale in a few days, there’s a punishing schedule ahead.

After a light breakfast, Adam takes me out into the snowy wilds where a small log cabin awaits us.

‘I thought we could compose here for the day,’ he says showing me inside. ‘It’s where I write music sometimes. The solitude is helpful.’

I take in the c
osy interior, which is like a miniature version of the large cabin where we ate dinner and took breakfast.

There are animal furs and throws, and a wood-burning
stove which has been loaded with blazing wood. In the corner are a few guitars and a keyboard.

I grin at Adam, and then move to pick one of the guitars up.

‘This is perfect,’ I assure him. ‘Exactly right.’

I take in the cabin with pleasure. I could hardly think of a better place to compose this next song. It’s all about being raw and free and pure. The location is ideal.

I strum a few chords, and murmur a few of my early lyrics.

‘
Everything is stripped away, only you remain…’

‘
Wow,’ says Adam, ‘I think this is going to be hard. To work with you, knowing you’re singing about me.’

I look up at him.

‘But it sounds like the beginnings of a great song,’ he continues. ‘Really fresh and different. I think you’re coming into your own with this one Summer. I know a hit song when I hear it, and I think you’re on your way.’

‘
Thanks.’ I’m flattered by his praise.

‘
I think you could be braver with your vocal range though,’ he says.

‘
You do?’

Adam nods.

‘When you’re reaching the end of the song, I think it could benefit from a more dynamic range from low to high notes.’

‘
What do you mean?’ I ask. As far as I knew, I packed quite a range into the last bridge.

‘
I mean,’ says Adam, ‘it sounds incredible. Most singers should be happy with it. But you’re not most singers Summer. I think you can push yourself even further.’

My eyebrows
raise. ‘Most singers would already consider that last section hard to sing,’ I point out.

Adam nods.
‘I know. It is hard to sing. I’ll be honest Summer, I’d probably struggle to sing it myself. But like I said, you’re not just any singer. You can do more.’

I frown, thinking over what he’s saying. The truth is a part of me knows he’s right. I could push myself harder. But that would be a risk. I might not hit the notes on the night. Surely it makes more sense to stick with a solid
range which sounds good?

‘
What did you have in mind?’ I say cautiously.

Adam picks up a guitar, and strums the chords leading to the end of the song, part humming,
part singing the words.

‘
This part,’ he says, keeping the rhythm of the song, ‘where you drop to a middle C. I think it would sound incredible if you pitched the next note at a top E.’

My eyes widen.

‘You’ve got to be kidding me!’ I say. ‘That’s impossible.’

‘
Not for a really talented singer,’ says Adam. ‘All the greats have pulled it off.’

He studies me for a moment.

‘In fact,’ he adds, ‘I’m betting you’ve already done it.’

‘
What makes you think that?’ I demand.

‘
Because I know you Summer Evans, and I know how much music means to you. And in all those years struggling to get to the top, I’m guessing you will have been told that only a few singers can achieve high E after middle C, and you gave it a go yourself.’

‘
Well, obviously I’ve
tried
that note combination,’ I reply. ‘What professional singer wouldn’t?’

‘
Tried it and nailed it?’ suggests Adam.

‘
Maybe once or twice,’ I admit.

The truth is, Adam is totally right about me. That particular note combination was an obsession for me as a teenager. I worked for hours until I could pull it off.
But being in She’s All That meant I couldn’t expect George and Tammy to match that combination. So I haven’t sung it in years.

‘
I used to practise it quite a lot,’ I admit. ‘But I haven’t sung it in a long time. There’s no way I’m performance ready. And certainly not in a few days.’

‘
Try it,’ suggests Adam. And before I can object, he begins strumming the notes.

I begin to sing, swept along in the momentum of the song. And when we reach the middle C, I breathe it out, collecting myself, before pitching up high for the top E.

Arrrgh!

I miss the note completely, and the end result sounds awful.
I wince, totally mortified. It’s the first time I’ve sung out of tune in front of someone, perhaps ever.

‘
You see?’ I say, angry that he pushed me to embarrass myself. ‘It sounds awful. I’m way out of practice.’

Adam doesn’t look convinced.

‘You weren’t so far out,’ he says. ‘I think a few days practice and you’ll nail it every time.’

‘
But I only
have
a few days,’ I point out, exasperatedly. ‘What if I practise and I don’t get there? Then I’ll have to sing something on the night which I haven’t rehearsed for.’

‘
It’s a risk,’ admits Adam. ‘But risks are what makes great music. Bravery is always rewarded.’

‘
I’ll be under a lot of pressure performing,’ I point out. ‘Wouldn’t it be more sensible to sing something I know I can pull off.’

Adam considers this.
‘I suppose so,’ he says. ‘But in my experience, really gifted people come into their own under pressure. I don’t think it will break you. I think it will make you shine.’

‘
That’s only your opinion,’ I say, feeling a mountain of pressure. The memory of that missed note still has me burning with shame. It would be absolutely my worst nightmare, to sing off-key on stage.

Just the thought of it brings me out in a cold sweat.

‘Let’s just see how the next few hours go,’ I suggest, playing for time. ‘I’ve still got loads of work to do on the song. We can perfect it and then talk about whether it needs a massive end note.’

We spend the next few hours composing, and I feel something shift in Adam. Like he’s opened up, but he’s sad at the same time. I get the feeling, that hearing my lyrics about him are having a deep effect.

I can’t deny that h
aving Adam as a mentor is an incredible experience. It’s like he knows just the right time to intervene, and when to let me make mistakes. I feel like I’m being held in a warm pair of arms, yet totally free.

It’s a wonderful place to be in.

Secretly I think he’s probably right about pushing myself further on the notes. And as the trust builds between us I decide to give it a go. He’s made me braver than I would otherwise be.

After a full day’s hard work, I
’m really pleased with the progress. The song isn’t finished. But I can feel it’s going to be good.

‘
Summer,’ says Adam gently, as I pack away the guitar, ‘I want to tell you something.’

He says it softly, but I can tell by his tone that this is serious.

I turn slowly, signalling with my eyes that he can tell me anything.

‘
Well,’ he clarifies, ‘actually I want to show you something.’

‘
So show me,’ I reply.

Adam hesitates.
‘We need to fly somewhere first.’

Fly somewhere?

‘Not far,’ he adds, catching my expression. ‘It won’t interfere with the timings on Sing-Win.’

‘
As if I care about that!’ I say, stepping closer and taking his hand. ‘Adam, if you’re ready to open up to me, you could fly me to the other side of the world. I’d forget all about the music contest.’

He looks down, smiling a little.

‘That would be a shame,’ he said, ‘since I think you wrote a winning song today.’

I squeeze his hands tighter, not sure how to take his current mood.

‘Take me anywhere,’ I say.

His blue eyes shift up to me.

‘Ok then,’ he says. ‘I want to take you to Ireland.’

‘Ireland?’ The full implication of this is hitting me. ‘To meet your family?’

He’s met mine
. But am I ready to meet his? Certainly I’m curious. But this whole situation seems to rest on this big revelation he’s got planned. Do I want to meet his family under those circumstances?

‘
You’ll meet my Mam,’ he says. ‘And my younger brother. They’ll love you,’ he adds, catching my fearful expression. ‘Like I do.’

‘
Whatever it is you have to tell me,’ I say, ‘Can you tell me here instead? I’d love to meet your family. But it seems like a lot of emotion to put on a single occasion.’

Adam looks remorseful.
‘I know,’ he admits. ‘It’s part of my fucked-up old life. But I want you to see it Summer. I’m tired of being ashamed. I want to be honest with you.’

I wrap my arms around him and hug him tight.

‘I love you Adam Morgan,’ I whisper. ‘Whatever you have to tell me won’t change that.’