Authors: Delia Delaney
“Is Harlan coming for Christmas too?” my mom asked.
I stared at her for just a second
.
“Donna.”
“Well I’m just wondering…”
“What, you want me to invite Gage, too? Would that be exciting enough?
Jerry Springer style?
”
My dad chuckled.
“What about Wyatt’s other woman—
?
”
“Ellie, that’s enough.” Apparently that one didn’t amuse him.
“Well come on, what do
you
think?”
“It was just a question,” my mom said. “He just has his brother here…”
“They’re going to England.”
“Oh.”
And so that was the official disclosure about Tyse. It kind of had good and bad results, because even though they didn’t jump up and down to welcome him to the family, they didn’t completely shun me either. I guess the true test would be wh
en he actually came.
A
nd…
I still had Dawn to worry about.
Chapter Twenty-Nine
I was climbing one of those jagged little mountains, and although I knew I wasn’t even halfway up it, I already needed help.
The 22
nd
of December was a Thursday, two days before Tyse would be arriving. I left work that day, ecstatic for my winter vacation to begin. I had a voicemail from Tyse, so I listened to it as I pulled out of
my
parking
space. I didn’t get too far
because the second he said he had to cancel his flight, I stopped right there in the middle of the parking lot. He said he couldn’t make the trip, had some stuff going on, and he couldn't afford to take off from work. To say I was crushed was an understatement. My entire future depended on his visit; I wanted to confess how I really felt about him.
After being honked at by Belinda Martin, I moved my car into a different space and cried. I didn’t understand what was going on—why Tyse would cancel such an important trip—and when I called him back, all I got was his voicemail. I tried to be tough, but I knew I started blubbering halfway through my message. I begged him to reconsider, even offering (again) to pay his way. I even told him that I needed him, and that it w
as so important to me that he ca
me.
By ten o’clock that night he still wouldn’t answer the phone
or call me back. I was panicking
because I thought something was seriously wrong. I was even avoiding calls on my own phone because I didn’t want to talk to anyone, and I even lied to Harlan
via text
and said
I wasn’t feeling well
. I guess it wasn’t entirely untrue, but I just didn’t know what to say to him.
I felt even guiltier when he sent me flowers the next morning.
I tried my luck calling Nate’s shop on Friday. Luckily some
one answered, but
both
Tyse
and
Nate
weren’t in
and I had to leave a message for either
of them
to call me. I didn’t exactly trust that the guy took the message, so I even called back later that afternoon to leave it again.
I fished through everything that I had—papers and such—and finally found a phone number for Nate’s house. Of course I only got the answering machine, so I began leaving another message.
“…S
o please just call me back, Tyse,” I was begging. “I just need to talk to you. I’m about to hop on a plane—”
“Ellie, he’s not here,” a voice said.
“Nate?”
“Yeah, it’s Nate. Look, I don’t know what the hell is going on, but you’ve got my boy so tied up that I’m really pissed off right now. Quit playing games with him or—”
“What are you talking about?” I exclaimed. “I have no idea what’s going on
!
I’ve
been so excited for him to come for Christmas, and then he just calls and leaves me a voicemail that he had to cancel his flight.”
“What?”
“What do you mean ‘what’? Where is he, Nate? I need to talk to him.”
“He’s not here.
I haven’t seen him since yesterday.”
“Do you know where he could be? I’m really worried about him. I’ve left him a dozen messages and he won’t call me back. I’m about to come to California.”
His silence was gonna kill me, but he finally said, “Just give me some time and I’ll get a hold of him. You don’t need to come.”
“You know where he is?”
“Just give it some time, chica.”
He hung up the phone.
I was… Well, I don’t know what I was. I wanted to cry again, but I was also mad as a hornet. I was mad at Tyse for…well, everything…and I was mad at Nate for hanging up on me. I was mad at the stupid airline for
letting Tyse cancel
the flight.
Then I started thinking about Nate’s initial reaction on the phone. I had Tyse tied up over what? Quit playing games with him? That confused me, and I honestly didn’t know what to think of it. Tyse knew how badly I wanted to see him—I said it every time we spoke on the phone. How could he not understand how much he meant to me?
Harlan stopped by around three
to see how I was doing. He didn’t seem too put off that I wasn’t actually ill but just stressed out about a few things. He didn’t even pry, but when I’d checked my phone for probably the fifth time while he was over, he did ask if I was expecting a call.
I ended up telling him about Tyse canceling his trip, and how I still couldn’t get a hold of him. I admitted to how worried I was and that I didn’t understand what was going on. Harlan had nothing to say, not even a little piece of advice or encouragement, so I finally just asked him what he thought.
He slightly shrugged. “I hardly know the fellow, so I don’t feel equipped to have an answer.”
“Not even an opinion?”
“Well I could speculate, but I’m sure you’ve already conjured up all kinds of creative
possibilities
.”
I smiled
because
he was right.
“So what’s your worst-case scenario?” he asked.
He had my leg in his lap and he softly rubbed my foot. It was so relaxing that I might have gone to sleep had we not been talking
.
A
nd had I not felt totally overwhelmed
.
My arm was resting over my eyes when I murmured, “That he hates my guts for some reason.”
Harlan chuckled. “And why would h
e hate you
?”
“I don’t know. You asked for my worst-case scenario and that’s it. You didn’t ask for it to make sense.”
“Okay, so what’s your most
logical
scenario?”
I thought for a few seconds. “I don’
t know. Do I think logically?
”
Again he laughed
,
and that’s when my phone rang. I almost fell off the couch trying to reach for it on the coffee table.
“Hello?”
“Uh, yeah it’s Nate.”
“I know. Did you find him?”
“Uh, yeah I talked to him.”
My heart started pounding in my chest. “Well?”
“He’s okay. He’s headed up north for a couple of weeks. Took on a short term that pays pretty good.”
That totally did not settle right with me
.
“And why wouldn’t you have know
n
that, Nate? He works for you; he would have said he was taking a temporary job.”
He was silent for a few seconds. “Yeah, I knew
he was looking into it
. I just didn’t know what he told you. I didn’t know why you didn’t know or whatever.”
“Oh, so you guys had to get your stories straight?
”
“He said he’ll call you tonight, sometime after ten. He’s just busy
getting things together
right now. I
gotta
go. Bye, Ellie.”
I was totally frustrated, but before I even put the phone down, my sister was calling me, wanting to know which dress I’d decided to wear for the party that night. I didn’t dare admit that I had completely forgotten about it, and I only said I hadn’t picked one out yet.
“Go with the silver one,” she said decisively. “It looks so cute on you and you have the best legs for it.”
“I’ll probably freeze my butt off in that.”
“We’ll be inside. No, it’s perfect. And your Vera’s,” she added. “I gotta go, so I’ll see you two there. Bye!”
I hung up and groaned.
“You
completely
forgot, didn’t you?” Harlan smiled.
“Yes,” I laughed. “What about you? Is that what you’re wearing?”
“No, my attire is in the car. Just in case you decided to go.”
“Hmm,” I said, glancing at the clock. It was almost four, and if the party started at seven, and we stayed for two hours, I could be home before ten when Tyse called. “Yeah, I guess we could go for a little bit.”
“You don’t have to if you’re not feeling up to it.”
“I know, but if Dawn is actually going to wear a white dress, I can’t miss any snowman comments she might get.”
Harlan laughed out loud. “You’re absolutely rotten to your sister.”
“Hey, I put up with my fair share.”
By seven-fifteen we were at the Marriott, and I have to admit that it was kind of fun getting dressed up for the night. It was a formal event since it was a charity fundraiser, so H
arlan was sporting a very nice Armani
suit. He looked
really
good in it, and after his
generous
comments about the way
I
looked
, I felt pretty happy to be his date
that night.
After he took me home, he walked me to the door like he always did. I’d been feeling some pretty warm vibes from him all night, so when he leaned in for his customary peck on the cheek, I wasn’t surprised when he stopped and looked me in the eyes instead. I could feel my entire body turn about ten degrees hotter as he softly touched my face with his hand and ran his thumb over my jaw line. I knew he was waiting for me to reciprocate the desire, just so he was sure it was okay to kiss me.
I did desire affection, so I slid my hands around his waist and welcomed his lips against mine. I guess I wasn’t surprised by how good of a kisser he was, but I was surprised by how much power he had over me with hardly even any contact. I guess I understood it after a few seconds, since I was unlocking the front door and wanting to kiss him
longer
because of it. I
t was a pretty clever technique
on his part
and I liked it, so we continued kissing once the front door shut.
He slid my sweater off and it fell to the floor. I could barely feel his fingers on the skin of my neck and shoulders, but again it had
the same affect as his kiss had
.
H
is hands traveled down my waist to my hips, and I enjoyed the way he barely inched my
dress
up.
But that was all the further he went, and he returned his hands to my shoulders
as he continued to kiss me
.
Gradually he pulled away, kissing me one last time before he quietly said, “I should probably go.”
He didn’t move though, so I could only assume that he didn’t want to, and he was only waiting for me to agree
or not
.
“Yeah, that’s…that’s probably a good idea,” I smiled
,
subtly trying to catch my breath
.
He slightly nodded his head. “Was it too soon?” he asked, referring to the kiss.
I slowly shook my head. “Um, no, I think it was okay.”
“You
think
it was okay?” he tease
d
.
“Um, well
that
was more than okay,” I admitted honestly.
“But did I cross the line,” he wanted to know.
“
No, you didn’t. Uh…
I think I needed it and I feel good
because of it
.”
“Good in what way?”
I knew what he wanted me to say, but I just wasn’t at that point yet. I already felt really guilty about it because
now
I was only thinking about Tyse. That good feeling kind of disappeared.
“W
hat’s the matter?” he asked. “I’m sorry, if you don’t want to answer that then—”
“I can answer it, but I don’t…”
“Don’t what? Want to hurt my feelings?”
I nodded reluctantly.