Sweet Contradiction (20 page)

“I’m sorry, Beth.” I took a sip and groaned in ecstasy. I pulled my knees up to my chest and glanced over at my best friend.

“What are you sorry about exactly?” I asked once my head wasn’t quite so fuzzy.

“I should never have pushed you to go see your parents, I just thought after all this time …” She waved a hand helplessly in the air in front of her. I swallowed another mouthful of liquid heaven and shook my head.

“Don’t. It’s not your fault. You were right. I did need to go back there for a lot of different reasons.” I grimaced when I suddenly remembered that I hadn’t really spoken to Matt since he’d brought me home from my parent’s house the night before. No telling what he was thinking right about then. I wouldn’t have been surprised to find out he left town and washed his hands of the crazy girl with the crazy ass family. “I didn’t think my dad would say such horrible things with Matt there though,” I muttered. I might have even held out a teensy bit of hope that he would have been impressed with Matt since he was a pastor’s son.
Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.

“I’ve got something I want to give you,” Jen said gently. I raised my head from my depressing thoughts and met her gaze. She had her
Jen’s up to something
grin in place and I was immediately intrigued. She didn’t have that grin very often. She sat her empty cup in the sink and motioned for me to follow her. “C’mon.” I sat my cup beside hers in the sink and followed her up to her room. I plopped down on the corner of her bed.

“Is it a puppy?” I guessed. Jen snorted. “A new pair of boots?” I asked with a dreamy sigh. Jen made a sound of loathing. She wasn’t too keen on my love of cowboy boots. She pulled a small box out of her bottom drawer and came over to sit on the bed next to me. She ran her hand over the box gently, her eyes met mine and I could see the happiness shining there behind them. “I kept this for a very long time. I would have given it to you before, but the time wasn’t right.” She smiled a tiny, secretive smile. “The time is right now, though,” she said quietly.

I gasped and smacked a hand over my mouth when I heard the sound of a dozen or more tiny charms tinkling against each other. It wasn’t the same bracelet as the one Jen had given when we were children, but it was a more expensive, adult version of it. Strung on a beautiful blue silk cord was a dozen tiny sterling silver stars, tiny, iridescent, Swarovski crystal beads, a sterling heart, guitar, shooting star, and even a sterling silver cowboy boot. Another addition was a sterling silver ribbon in remembrance of Jen’s mom. A tear escaped and trickled down my cheek as Jen handed me the bracelet.

“I told you that one day we’d both be able to reach for our dreams. Sometimes that means we have to let go of the people who would trample our souls so we can soar.” Jen smiled sadly as she ran a finger over the ribbon charm. “And sometimes that means living in the moment and loving without restraint … no matter how much time we may have together.” I grabbed Jen around her neck and pulled her to me for a hug. No matter what I believed, one thing I knew for sure was that Jen had been a gift from God and I would never find another friend like her.

“Thank you,” I whispered fiercely. Jen hugged me back tighter and for the first time in my life I wasn’t sure if I had been talking to her or if it had been a tiny prayer. Jen cleared her throat and stood up.

“Now, let’s get dressed. The guys will be here soon. We’re barbequing at the river.” I jumped up from the bed and my mouth hung open in surprise.

“What?” I asked, unsure if I’d heard her right. Jen grinned and then shrugged.

“It was Matt’s idea, so don’t give me that look, Elizabeth Michaels.” She walked over to her drawer and pulled out a swimsuit. “Besides, you’ll get a chance to show off that gorgeous tan of yours.” She sighed wistfully. I smiled and picked up her suit and twirled it around.

“Only if you let me borrow a suit,” I said slyly. Jen groaned and then shrugged.

“Whatever. They all look better on you than me anyway.” I opened up her bathing suit drawer … no joke, she probably owned a dozen or more of them. I was like a kid in a candy shop picking one out. I ended up choosing a pretty turquoise and black tankini. Jen chose a gorgeous, ruched red polka dot one-piece. We threw on jean shorts and flip flops, grabbed our beach bags and sunglasses and were ready to go in record time. By the time we packed up a cooler of drinks and snacks, the doorbell was ringing.

I sat on my beach towel at the edge of the river rubbing tanning oil into my skin, ready to soak up the sun and dry off from the swim we’d just had. Jen was making the picnic area we’d set up look “just right”. I rolled my eyes behind my sunglasses, she couldn’t help it, she thrived on her perfectionism and I loved her for it. We were just waiting for the guys to get done with the burgers and hotdogs. The sound of the river flowing at my feet was so relaxing and would have been extremely peaceful, except for a small family who’d also decided to take advantage of the beautiful Saturday outdoors. The dad was sitting and cleaning some fish with a huge cast on his propped up leg. I didn’t mind the little girl’s shrieks as her brother chased her up and down the river bank with a huge lizard, though. I’d always wanted a brother or sister. That is, until it dawned on me one day that I wishing for another child to endure what I had to. I’d been super lucky that Jen had friended me at school. A sister of my own and she would never have to live with my parents. When I was a child and then a teen, I was so thankful for the perfection of our relationship.

“Time for some grub!” Hunter bellowed, interrupting my trip down memory lane. I dipped my hands in the river and then dried them off on my towel. Our river neighbor’s little boy skipped up to me and held out a grubby hand, offering me a fistful of weeds with one or two squished wild flowers mixed in there. No more than six, with a headful of red hair, and freckles sprinkled across the bridge of his nose. The boy looked like mischief incarnate. I smiled and took the offering.

“For me?” I asked. He nodded his head and puffed his chest out. I hid a grin and made a show of smelling the “flowers”. “They are just beautiful, you sure do know how to win a girl’s heart.” He grinned hugely, revealing two missing front teeth.

“You’ll marry me now? Dad says mom married him ‘cause he brought her flowers and candy.” He furrowed his brow in thought. “I don’t have any candy … but I can getcha a frog.”

“I do like a frog as much as the next girl, but you might want to save it,” I said sadly. I knelt down and mock-whispered. “You see that guy over there?” Matt was watching our interaction with a small smile on his lips and a twinkle in his eye.

“The one with big muscles and red swim trunks?” He asked. I nodded and sighed.

“That guy is my boyfriend. I don’t think he’d like it if I married you while I’m his girlfriend.” I said. The little boy narrowed his eyes and then shrugged.

“I guess not. But I bet I could catch a lot more frogs than him.” I smiled and ruffled his hair.

“I bet you could too, but let’s not tell him that, ‘kay?” The boy nodded and turned to run off, his proposal all but forgotten in his haste to run back to his camp site where his mom was promising marshmallows. I sat my flowers and weeds on the table and grabbed a paper plate, trying to ignore Matt’s laughing eyes as I put some potato salad on my plate.

“Pretty flowers,” he chuckled. I raised a brow and tried to keep a straight face.

“I’ll have you know that was my first ever proposal,” I said haughtily. Matt’s eyes shone as he smiled.

“Should I be worried?” he asked, his voice as serious as possible. I took a bit out of a carrot stick as I piled some fresh veggie on my plate.

“Well, he did question your manly, frog catching abilities,” I answered. Matt let out a bark of laughter.

“Did he now? I might have to defend my champion frog catching title, then.” I began laughing as I added a burger to my plate.

“Don’t let Matt fool you, he was afraid of frogs when he was little,” Hunter muttered around a mouthful of food. I grinned up into Matt’s beet red face.

“Champion frog catcher, huh?” I asked sweetly. He shrugged and sat down in the folding chair next to me.

“Well, champion in the sense that I finally got over my fear after my brothers decided to dump a bucketful of them in my bed one night when I was sleeping. I’d say catching over fifty frogs in my bedroom warrants
some
kind of title,” he grumbled. Matt eyed his brother dangerously as Hunter laughed.

“What was Hunter afraid of as a child?” Jen piped in.

“Nothing. Nothing as a child, but as a teen ….” Matt’s mouth clamped shut and he glanced down at his plate.

“Water,” Hunter whispered. “I was afraid of water for several years.” He said. Jen was staring at Hunter, clearly wanting to know how someone could be afraid of water, not as a child, but as a teen.

We all finished our food in relative quiet, enjoying each other’s company and the perfection of the day.

“So, I’m stuffed,” I said as I patted my stomach. “How about we go and find some perfect marshmallow roasting sticks?” I asked Jen. She smiled up at me and nodded her head.

“Sounds like a plan.”

“Hunter’s very private,” Jen mentioned a few minutes later when we were well away from the picnic spot.

“I think so. Pretty intense too.”

“Yeah, I’ve noticed that.” Jen picked up a stick and pulled off the stray leaves. She held it up for inspection. “He doesn’t open up. I’d love to know whose initials are next to his on his tattoo,” Jen sighed. “But, it’s not like we’re dating or anything really, so I don’t ask.”

“You’re not?” I asked with a smirk. Jen swatted me with a stick.

“No, we’re not,” she answered softly. “Not really. What about you and Matt? How are things between you guys?” Jen asked.

“Things are just perfect,” I muttered. Jen came around and acted like she was trying to find the hidden truth in my face. I laughed and swatted her hand away.

“But?” Jen prompted.

“But I wonder when something will happen that will finally be just the right thing to push Matt away,” I said with a shrug. “He’s perfect. He has been amazingly understanding with me, hasn’t even brought up the craziness he witnessed at my parent’s house last night.” I shrugged again.

“So, what’s the problem exactly?” Jen asked sarcastically.

“I’m just waiting for him to realize I’m not worth all the trouble, ya know?”

“You are such an idiot,” Jen snapped. My head swung up and I stared at her with my mouth hanging open in surprise. She had her hands on her hips and a scowl on her face. “That boy is head over heels in love with you. You could eat small kittens for breakfast and he’d still think you walked on water.” She harrumphed. “And if anyone deserves a love like that, it’s you,” she added softly.

“I love you Jennifer Collins,” I said after a moment. She snorted.

“I know. It’s hard not to,” she said, loftily. I laughed and held up another stick for Jen’s approval. She took it and stripped away the leaves and nodded, pleased with its supposed roasting abilities. “That’s four. Let’s go roast some marshmallows.”

We cleared the wooded area several feet from where my towel still sat on the edge of the river bank. I waved over to Matt near the picnic area. He smiled and waved back. I turned around as I caught something red bobbing in my peripheral vision. The little red headed boy was hovering partially out over the river, his foot resting precariously on a rock as he reached for a small frog on another rock a little ways out in the river. Before I could blink, before a sound could escape my lips, or my feet could move, I watched as the boy teetered and then fell with a splash into the river.