The Defiance (Brilliant Darkness) (15 page)

I hold his head in my lap, singing lullabies, until he finally slips into sleep.

I sit awake, missing my mother. When the muted conversations and rustlings from the clearing finally fade, I ease Eland's head onto his pillow and prepare to meet Peree and Petrel. I still think this is a bad idea—how many times do the Three and the Covey have to threaten us? But it can't be helped. We need a solid plan for how to move the people we have to Koolkuna.

Only the odd snore rumbles from the other shelters as I crack the door open and slide out. The forest isn't so quiet. Crickets hum hypnotically, leaves shift and sigh in the breeze, and frogs and bats keep the time with their cries. If the greenheart trees offer the forest its scent and flavor, then its animal inhabitants provide the tune.

I creep like prey from dark spot to dark spot, minding the sound of my steps. There's probably a Groundling guard somewhere. The moon illuminates the path, so I walk under the shade of the tree branches. There's a luster ahead.

For a long time I thought the water hole glowed at night. Calli finally told me the moon—which I’ve heard can be as slim as a curled-up leaf or as spherical as a stone—reflects in the water hole below. It seems unfair, somehow. The sighted see not only the fickle moon, they see two.

The water sweeps softly onto the shore, then recedes, dancing with itself, careless who hears it. I hold under the cover of the forest, soaking in the sounds and scents of the night.

After a few minutes, I hear more deliberate movements in the treetops: the low thump of quiet footsteps along the walkway overhead. They stop above me. A soft birdcall drifts down. I wave, letting them know it's safe.

The rope ladder dives toward me, bumping against the tree trunk as it falls, and I steady it as Peree descends. My heart pulses in my chest as he draws near. I feel like I’ve stolen these moments with him, moments we’ll have to eventually give back. I don't want to steal time with him. I want it to be ours to keep.

We embrace, and I find his ever-present bow and quiver lying in wait across his back. There are new feathers in his hair. Peree's bow and feathers: the things that mark him as a Lofty. One feather drops out of my fingers to the ground. I'm glad I brought the colorful one Calli found to replace it.

"C'mon, you two, quit it. You're embarrassing your mother," Petrel whispers, hopping off the ladder a minute after Peree. We huddle into the shadows cast by the trees.

"They aren't embarrassing me, Petrel," Kadee says quietly as she steps down beside us. "I love seeing them happy together."

I hug her, glad to hear her voice, especially after thinking about Aloe so much tonight. My raw heart is soothed a little to know there's another woman I can turn to for the sort of motherly advice I always thought Aloe would be here to give.

Petrel drops an arm around me, squeezing my shoulders after Kadee releases me. "I'm sorry about how things turned out the last time you and Eland were in the trees. If I'd known what Osprey was up to, I never would've left you two there alone."

"Please don't apologize. If it wasn't for you, Eland might have hung on that tree for days," I remind him. "Things worked out in the end. How's Moon?"

"Like a rabid chipmunk. Don't tell her I said that. But seriously. Half the time she's in a frenzy of activity—eating, nesting, and running around—the other half she's crashed out, sleeping. It's exhausting to watch." He chuckles. "She said to tell you to eat. And that she's looking forward to spending more time with you. Actually, she told me to tell you about four other things, but there's no way I could keep it all straight. Anyway, she's good. Ready to pop."

"We'd better find somewhere else to talk," Peree says. "The water hole is too exposed." He curls my hand around his arm.

We steal through the forest until we reach a thick stand of brush and trees where Peree and I went to be alone the first few days after the Reckoning. Before our people decided we couldn't be together at all.

 We push through the wall of undergrowth. Or maybe overgrowth—the vegetation claws at me from every direction.

I don't usually go running through thick bushes and tree branches if I can help it. I usually end up with something hairy with multiple legs attached to me that I don't know about until I'm bitten. I decide I’m safe this time with Peree, Petrel, and Kadee along.

Kadee joins me in the small area concealed behind all the foliage. "What is this place?"

"A pretty good hiding spot." Peree chuckles. "Not that we've ever used it for that, right, Petrel?"

"No, never," Petrel says. "Not even when we were hungry and shot a few rabbits on the ground . . . then climbed down to get them . . . and were stuck in here for hours while two Groundlings sat on the other side gossiping.” He laughs. “Being quiet for that long was an extreme test of our newfound manhood. Anyway, eventually we fell asleep. Didn't wake up until after dark. Shrike was furious when we finally got back home—remember, Peree? He made us eat meals with our hands tied behind our backs for days."

"I had no idea you Lofties snuck around on the ground so much." I say it like I'm kidding, but it astonishes me that they got away with it. "And is that an effective punishment? Tying your hands behind your backs?"

"It is when you're a starving teenage boy," Peree says. "There's only so much meat you can get off the bone without holding it in your fingers. We had to live on nuts and berries."

"Almost killed us," Petrel adds.

"You never told me you already knew about this place," I say to Peree.

"Can't tell you all my secrets at once, can I? No mystery in that." There's a smile in his voice.

"We'd better get started," Kadee says. "We can’t afford to be caught meeting like this."

That focuses us. I settle onto the mostly dry ground, and Peree sinks down next to me, setting his bow aside. His honeysuckle scent is a bit trampled right now. It’s not his fault; we aren't allowing the Lofties frequent access to the water hole for bathing.

"How are things going in the trees?" I ask. The question is met with silence.

"What?" I ask.

"We aren't too popular right now," Peree says. I can tell there's something he's not saying.

“What happened?”

"I was jumped by Osprey and his group. They know I'm talking to people about leaving."

I touch his face. His cheek is puffy, and one of his eyes is swollen completely shut. “Oh, Peree . . .”

"We'll be fine . . . as long as I stay away from you from now on and act like the plan's off."

"Then you definitely shouldn't be down here! And Kadee, Petrel, you shouldn't be, either."

"I kept telling them that, but they wouldn't listen," Peree says.

Petrel speaks, his voice unusually serious. "Moon and I don't want to hatch our baby here anymore, now that we know there's another place to raise her. Not after everything's that happened. And don't even get Moon started on the Exchange. Her family tends to have fair-haired and light-eyed children, but you never know."

"What about Breeze? Have you asked her to come with us?" I ask.

Peree answers. "Not yet. She's really not doing well with Shrike and everything. I'll work on her."

"I hope she will.” I squeeze his hand. “Peree, please be careful. Don't start anything else with Osprey. It's not worth it. Okay?"

"I won't. Not if I can help it." He skims his hand up and down my back soothingly. "Now . . . the plan. I think we have to go through the caves to Koolkuna, although our people won't be too happy about it. You can still follow the crampberries, right?"

I consider the frequent whiffs of the disgusting berries I've caught in the caves. "Oh, yeah. No problem. But we should bring a fresh supply just in case. I'll ask Eland to gather some."

"We're already stockpiling supplies." Peree says. "Food, extra clothing, medicine. I can probably get them into the caves before we leave, if the guards are as sleepy as they were tonight. Your job is to move them into that first passageway we took when we went to find the Waters. Your people don't use that area very much, right?"

"Water's going to be an issue, though,” I say.

“Maybe we can leave that up to each person. Spread the word that if they're coming, they have to save and bring a few days worth of drinking water,” Petrel says. “How long will the trip take?”

“Maybe a day, now that we have the trail of crampberries to follow through the caves," I say. “When will we go?"

"In five nights," Kadee says. "The moon will be new, which should make it easier for you to get people from the trees to the caves with the least risk of being seen. It could still be dangerous, though. We don't know what the Covey or the Council of Three will do. No one wants a repeat of the Reckoning."

The night air wriggles down the collar of my dress, making me shiver. Five nights. Five more days to spend with my people in the only home I've ever known. I want to go to Koolkuna, but sneaking out in the middle of the night with a group of rebels wasn't how I envisioned doing it.

"Wait, you said it would be easier for
us
to get to the caves. Aren't you coming?" I ask Kadee.

"I'm leaving tomorrow night to prepare the
anuna
for your arrival. I will meet you at the cave mouth where you saw the big cat. That entrance to the caves, if I have the right one in mind, is not terribly far from Koolkuna. If we're fortunate, the sick ones will stay away so we can move the people to the village from there."

I can think of about a million things that could go wrong with that plan, and a million more that could go wrong in the meantime, but I also don't have a better idea. We discuss the potential pitfalls while the moon skates across the sky.

I'm still worried about Peree and his family being caught, but it's wonderful to spend time with them. If Eland and Moon were here, it would be perfect. Hopefully we'll all be together soon.

Kadee takes me aside when the time comes to say goodbye. Her voice is kind. "You're doing the right thing, you know."

"What do you mean?"

"I see you struggling. You came back to try to persuade your people to go to Koolkuna, and now they won't go. You're worried you're abandoning them. But you're not. Has Peree told you the story about the thirsty horse that was led to water, but wouldn't take a drink? I used to tell him that one when he was being stubborn."

"Peree? Stubborn? Can't imagine that." I laugh. "No, I haven't heard it. What's a horse?" I assume it’s some kind of large animal, but I wouldn’t know. There are so few big animals left in the world.

"Never mind. My point is this: the wonderful thing about being human is that we're able to make our own choices. Even if they're the wrong ones."

"But what if
I'm
making the wrong one?"

"At least you will have had the chance to choose. And that's what you're offering your people: a choice."

A memory tugs at me—holding out my hand to Peree at the Summer Solstice the night we met.
At least I'll have made my own choice
, I thought, as I asked him to dance before the sick ones descended. I hold my hand out to him now. He tucks it into his, and I smile.

Peree is my choice. I choose him. And like Petrel and Moon, I want a chance at a peaceful future for my little brother and my future family. Kadee is right. We offered our people two paths, and we have to accept that some may walk a different one than we do. That's the beauty, and the price, of free will.

Kadee and Petrel leave soon after. Peree insists we stay, that we've earned a few minutes alone together. I argue with him that he should go, but he wins by threatening to tickle me until I give away our hiding place. So we sit pressed together in the small clearing with night creatures screeching and croaking in the trees around us.

"I have something for you." I pull out the feather and hand it to him. "Calli found it. She said it would look nice in your hair." He doesn't need to know she said it sarcastically.

"Tell her thanks." After a moment, he ties it in. "I don't think I've ever seen a bird this could have come from."

"That's what she said, too."

"It actually reminds me of a story. Do you want to hear it?"

"Yes . . . but is it a quick one? Guards and rules and punishments and . . ." I gesture around us.

He leans close and kisses my neck. Lightning races through my veins, originating at his lips and crackling through the tips of my toes. He whispers in my ear, "Don't rush a story-teller. It cramps our creativity."

"Please, take all the time you want, then.” I'm a little breathless. “If we're caught, I'll say I couldn't possibly ask you to hurry up and finish the story. It would cramp your creativity."

He chuckles. "Okay, here it is. Many years ago, a village existed, perched on the top of a great hill. The people there were safe, living against the blue sky. They had enough food and water, but they were not content. The men and the women of the village were not partners. The men used their strength to overpower the women, they set up rules that kept the women from making decisions, and they favored their boy children over their girls. The women were unhappy, but could not see a way to change their situation. They would gather every day to care for the children, cook the meals, and mend clothing. And they would talk about what it would be like to be as free as the hawks and eagles they saw gliding over their homes each day."

Peree's voice changes as he speaks, caressing and curling around his words like a lover. His voice envelops me, too, until I almost forget about the guards and rules and punishments myself. Almost.

"One day, a colorful bird flew among the gathering of women. It had a small hooked beak of bright orange, like a tiger, with feathers in every hue that shimmered as the bird flew. The women sat still, watching. They were astonished. They did not know such a beautiful bird existed. The bird landed on a nearby tree stump and spoke to them, its voice high and clear. It said, 'Women, I have been watching you. Why do you allow your men to treat you and your children this way? Why do you not rise up against them?' The women hung their heads, pain and anger in their hooded eyes. Finally, one of them spoke. 'We are not strong enough. We have no weapons. We cannot rise up against them.' And the bird said, 'If it is a weapon you need, take one of my feathers. It will slay any man you use it against.'"