“Your mother? Felicia?” She looked utterly dismayed.
“No, my other mother, Danielle. My father’s wife.”
She looked understandably confused since she knew nothing about his atypical family. Now was a good time to clue her in, he supposed. “My biological parents were never married, Michelle—not to each other, that is. Danielle and Felicia were best friends since childhood. They both, unfortunately, fell in love with the same man, my father. He apparently was in love with both of them, but he chose and married Danielle over my mother.”
“But your mother was already pregnant with you?” Michelle asked.
“Nope. Danielle could not have children. So my mother volunteered to be a surrogate for them.”
“You mean your mother maintained her friendship with them after your father left her?”
“Yep. She and Danielle had some kind of special bond, and they refused to let a man come between them.”
“Wow, that’s amazing. I don’t think I could do that after a man jilted me.”
“That’s my mother. She conceived me through artificial insemination. Well, that’s what they’ve told everyone.”
“You don’t believe it?”
He chuckled. “I don’t know what to believe. Come on, they were in love. And I know my mother still loves my father. It’s just twisted.” He shook his head in frustration. “Anyway, the deal was that Felicia would let them adopt me, but she’d maintain a strong presence in my life. By the way,” he added, after a short pause. “She told me you two have met.”
Michelle grinned. “Yeah, the day I canceled Precious’ lessons. She told me to stand up to you. I like her.”
“She seems to like you, too.”
“She must have a big heart to forgive your father for choosing another woman over her then giving them her own child to raise,” Michelle said.
“When you truly love someone, you could probably forgive them just about anything.” If Cassie had lived, he was almost certain he would’ve forgiven whatever secret she was hiding from him. He did love her, still did. And God, he missed her, even more now with Michelle’s delightful presence in his home reminding him how much he enjoyed being a father, a husband, a lover.
“I hope I find someone to love me that much, one day,” Michelle murmured, interrupting his nostalgic moment.
He smiled at her, his heart racing at the thought of loving her. “I’m sure you will.”
“So what’s wrong with your other mother, Danielle?” she asked quickly as if regretting she’d voiced her hopes.
“She has brain cancer.”
“Oh, that’s awful. I’m so sorry.”
“Thank you. That’s why I’m taking Precious to see her before it’s too late. She never got to say goodbye to her mother.” Erik took Michelle’s hand from her lap and curled his fingers around hers. “You still want to come along after I made you go ballistic?”
“I was acting like a jealous teenager. I thought you and Bridget had made plans.”
“Why would you think that?”
“Well, you took her call in your study last night, and then when we left Precious’ bedroom, I thought we would… Well, I just thought…” She dropped her gaze, seemingly embarrassed again to have vocalized her hopes.
Erik put his hand under her chin and raised her face. He brushed his thumb across her flawless cheek. “I have no interest in Bridget Ashley, and I’m not denying that I want you, Michelle Carter. I do, more than you can imagine. But making love with you would change everything. I’m not ready for that deep a commitment. Until then, I have to keep my desires in check. Do you understand?”
She nodded, her smile wrapping around him like warm honey. She leaned over and pressed her warm lips against his cheek then suddenly pulled her hand from his and jumped up.
The unexpected gesture sent Erik floating up on cloud nine. He pushed to his feet, grinning like a shot fox.
“When are we leaving?” she asked.
“In about an hour. I have to stop by the hospital to check on a patient then we’ll head up from there. It’s a three-hour drive. I thought we’d stop for a picnic on the way. Precious is already packing. I suggest you check to make sure she has the right clothes. She packed for our last Christmas visit and when we got there, all she had was a swimsuit, two pairs of shorts, a shirt, and no underwear. We were there for a week. She got a new wardrobe for Christmas. Maybe that was her plan all along.”
Michelle laughed. “Then I’d better make sure she does it right this time.” She glanced down at her attire—too short shorts and a spaghetti strap top. “I should change, huh?”
He gave her the once-over. “Yeah. I wouldn’t want a line of horny truckers honking at us all the way to Granite Falls.”
“Would that make you jealous, Dr. LaCrosse?” Her eyes challenged him to be truthful.
“Yes. Ms. Carter. It would make me extremely jealous.” He turned and began descending the stairs. At the bottom, he stopped and looked up. She was still standing where he’d left her, and gazing at him with a warm smile on her face. “Michelle?”
“Yes, Erik?”
“Bring along a nice dress, nothing fancy. I’m taking you out tonight. I promise it won't be McDonald’s this time.”
Michelle bit into her lower lip, her smile spreading across her face as she watched him walk in the direction of his study. They were going on a real date. He’d said that lovemaking would change their relationship, but as far as she was concerned, it was already changed. They weren’t just employer and employee any more, two people from two different worlds who’d come together for a common cause. They had crossed over into friendship and now maybe courtship. The knowledge sent a warm glow flowing through her.
***
As the Mercedes sped along Interstate 93 North, Michelle took a swift glance in the back seat. Satisfied that her charge was safely secured and still deeply engrossed in her latest
Dear America Series
book, Michelle donned her sunglasses, pulled the car visor down against the morning sun, and settled comfortably into the cool leather seat.
The sky was a deep-blue canopy with hardly any clouds overhead. The sunny summer day was predicted to be a hot one, soaring into the nineties, and she was dressed for it in a pair of white crop pants, a peach sleeveless cotton top, and sandals.
She’d brought along some pages from her manuscript, intending to edit on the road, but had found it difficult to concentrate with Erik this close to her. She peered at him from the corner of her eyes. He was dressed in linen knee-length shorts and a short sleeve shirt that showed off his muscular arms and legs. He was truly a beautiful man, and each time she saw him, was near him, her heart raced and her throat dried up.
“Had enough?”
Michelle startled at the gruff voice.
He turned his head and gazed at her through his Louis Vuitton sunglasses, his lips twisting into a subtle smile.
“No. But, it’ll have to do for now.”
His smile turned into a wide grin. He cast a cautious glance in the back. “How’s everything back there, Muffin?”
“Good, Daddy. I want to finish this book before we get to Grandpa’s. Ms. Clements is giving a prize to the person who reads the most books over the summer. I want to win.”
“Okay then, baby. I’ll leave you to your reading.”
Michelle giggled. “She’s such an avid reader. Two whole grades ahead.”
Erik slowed down as he approached the tollbooth for the machine to read the speed pass on his windshield. When the light turned green, he fed the gas pedal. “She’s been reading since she was two and a half,” he said proudly.
“She has good genes, and big shoes to fit into. Her father
did
graduate head of his class from Harvard,” she said.
“How do you know?”
“I saw the diplomas and numerous certificates in your office on the several occasions I’ve been to the hospital.”
“You know quite a bit about me, Michelle, yet I know nothing about you.” He paused. “That night on the patio, before Bridget interrupted us, I feel that you were about to open your past to me. For some reason, we never got back around to that conversation. Want to fill me in now?”
Since his eyes were sheltered behind the dark shades, Michelle couldn’t read his expression. One thing she knew, she was not ready to talk about her past, specifically her father. Erik had no idea how grateful she was that Bridget had interrupted them. That was her one moment of weakness. She wasn’t having a second. “I hardly think this is the time to bring up that subject,” she said between clenched teeth as she thumbed toward the back seat.
“Yeah, I guess you’re right. But we will finish. I do want to know you, Michelle Carter. All of you.”
That’s exactly what Michelle feared most. They rode in silence for a while, and when Michelle couldn’t stand it anymore, she asked, “Do you mind if I turn on the radio?”
“Go ahead. It’s on XM. Heart and Soul channel, I think.”
She pressed a button on the dashboard then immediately pulled back when Jennifer Hudson’s voice belting out ‘Spotlight’ filled the air. “Oh, I love that song.”
“Me, too.”
She chuckled. “I would never have guessed.”
“What?”
“That you listen to this kind of music. I thought you’d have it set to classical or—”
“Something excruciatingly boring.”
“I didn’t say that.”
“I’m eclectic. I enjoy a variety of music, depending on my mood.”
She wasn’t going to ask what his mood was with love songs floating around them. She laid her head against the headrest, stretched her legs out, and closed her eyes, as a sweet calmness settled in her heart. This feeling of happiness was so new to her. She liked it.
Close to one o’clock, Erik pulled off the highway and headed toward a picnic area. He was pleased that the only other people there were a middle-aged woman and a boy about ten years old.
Michelle and Precious helped unload the car and they spread a quilt on a patch of green grass under the shade of a willow tree, a good distance from the woman and child.
Precious dropped down next to her father on the quilt. “I’m so hungry, I could eat a whole horse and a pony, too.”
“Thought you didn’t like horses,” Erik said playfully, as he leaned back, supporting his weight on one elbow.
“Daddy, I don’t like riding them. It’s just an expression.” She spread her hands in impatience. “People don’t eat horses.”
Well, not in this country
. “Sorry. My bad.”
“You are bad,” Michelle murmured, opening up the picnic basket.
“You have no idea.” He sent her a sizzling smile over Precious’ curly head.
She rolled her eyes and handed him and Precious a sandwich each.
He grinned as he opened his up. “So how many books have you read so far this summer?” he asked Precious as they began to eat.
She squinted her eyes and chewed on her upper lip, just as her mother used to do when she was in deep thought. His heart did a double take at the simple memory.
“Seven…no… eight… yeah… eight!” Precious said, beaming.
“So when you finish the one you’re presently reading, it will be nine?”
“Uh-huh. Belinda’s only read five, Daddy. She told me when we talked on the phone yesterday.”
“Well, she’s been on vacation in Maine visiting her grandparents. Belinda is Precious’ best friend,” he told Michelle. “She lives a couple streets over from us.”
“Oh, I know all about Belinda,” Michelle said.
“Just because you’re on vacation doesn’t mean you shouldn’t read and do other productive stuff,” Precious said around a bite of her sandwich.
Erik caught and held Michelle’s gaze. Up until a month ago, he would have agreed with his daughter. After all, keeping the mind busy was the principle he’d been instilling in her for the past two years. But thanks to Michelle, he’d come to understand the value of relaxation and leisure time again. Like the way it used to be before...
He smiled at his daughter. “Well, Muffin, sometimes our minds need a break from reading and—uhh, productive stuff. Sometimes we need to put away the books, take out the ball, and play.”
Play seemed to be the trigger word his daughter needed to hear, Erik thought as he watched her drop a half eaten apple on the quilt and reach for a plastic bag of crumbs from the picnic basket.
“Can I go feed the ducks, Daddy?”
“Okay, but don’t get too close to the edge. I don’t want to have to fish you from that filthy water,” he said of the pond some fifty feet away where ducks clucked loudly.
“I won’t.” She jumped up and took off.
“You’re a good father,” Michelle said, taking a sip of water from a bottle.
“Ha. That’s not what you thought a month ago.”
“I never thought you were bad, just a bit too demanding.”
Erik studied her thoughtfully for a moment. “I’m glad you came along when you did. Precious had two other nannies and neither of them challenged me even though they must have known that I’d been asking too much of her. Why weren’t you afraid of me?”
She shrugged and plucked a grape from a bunch. “I’ve had to fight for everything I’ve ever had in this life. Robert taught me to stand up for myself ever since I was a little girl. He told me that even when I’m afraid to never let it show, never let my enemy know I’m quivering inside. If I see someone I love being taken advantage of, especially if that someone can’t speak for
herself
, I advocate.”
“You do love my daughter, don’t you?”
“Yes.” She popped the grape into her mouth and glanced off to the pond where the ducks clucked happily as Precious fed them the breadcrumbs.
Erik followed her gaze as he slowly sipped his iced tea. It was just like old times, he thought as he put the empty bottle in the basket. Feeling relaxed and very much at peace for the moment, he stretched out and closed his eyes.
With Precious gone, and Erik relaxing beside her, Michelle raised her face to the sky as a jet engine hummed high and far above them. A light breeze rustled through her short stresses and caressed her face. She smiled and pulled her legs up under her. Hugging her arms around them, she rested her chin on her knees as her thoughts filtered back to last night and the sweet tender moments she’d shared with Erik and his daughter in their home. Not once did he make her feel like a nanny, or an outsider.