The F-Word (9 page)

Read The F-Word Online

Authors: Jesse Sheidlower

bugfucker
noun

a man with a ridiculously small penis; (
hence
) a contemptible person.

1973
Zap Comix
(No. 6) (unpaged): Needle Dick the Bug Fucker.
1977
J. Sayles
Union Dues
20: “Hey, Needledick, check anybody’s oil lately?” “Needledick the Bug-Fucker!”
1966–80
J. McAleer & B. Dickson
Unit Pride
345: Then that dirty bohemian bug-fucker…puts the screws to us.
1990
A. Steele
Clarke County, Space
102: Screw that…I’m the only judge and jury you’re getting here, bugfucker.

bull fuck
noun

cream gravy (sometimes as a thick stew) or custard, fancied to resemble the semen of a bull.

[
1942
L. V. Berrey & M. Van den Bark
American Thesaurus of Slang
100: Gravy:
Bull shit, come,…gism
].
1961
E. Partridge
Dictionary of Slang & Unconventional English
(ed. 5) 1019:
Bull-fuck
. Custard: Canadian railroad-construction crews: since
ca
1910.
1966–67
in
Dictionary of American Regional English
I 445 [in sense “cream gravy”].
1971
C. C. Adams
Boontling
180:
Bull fuck
…A thick gravy containing chopped meat.
1991
A. R. Killingbeck
U.S. Army Privates, Sergeants, Fire & Smoke
40 [refers to 1953]: “Make a bullfuck.”…I watched the stew become thicker. “Soldier, that is what is known as a bullfuck.”

Bumblefuck
noun
[alteration of B
UMFUCK
]

a very remote place.
Jocular
.

1989
P. Munro
U.C.L.A. Slang
26:
Bumblefuck
…any faraway little town.
1990
U.S. student slang survey:
Bumblefuck
—a word used to describe a location that is very far away or out in the country. “I can’t believe we drove all the way to Bumblefuck to go to this party.”
1991
R. Spears
Slang & Euphemism
(abridged edition 2) 62:
Bumblefuck
…a primitive and rural place; podunk.
1999
S. Turow
Personal Injuries
23: Like two goofs from East Bumblefuck, Mort and I put all the pieces together.
2005
J. Mitchard
Breakdown Lane
63: He can’t spend too much, because, though he practices law where he lives now, he doesn’t make a lot because he basically lives in Bumblefuck, Egypt.

bumblefuck
noun

a bumbling person; a fool.

1997
S. Shem
Mount Misery
vii. 204: “My two older kids always called me a ‘bumblefuck’.” “What’s a bumblefuck?” “A slow, overly cautious driver.”
2004
S. Grafton
R is for Ricochet
xiii. 139: “I can help with that,” I said, mentally cursing the bumblefuck FBI agent who jumped the gun on us.
2008
A. Davies
Mine All Mine
217: I can get you past the primary systems, but then what are you two bumblefucks going to do?

Bumfuck
noun

Military & Students
. a very remote place.—used with a placename, esp. in
Bumfuck, Egypt
. Also
Bumfuckistan
.
Jocular
. See also BFE, B
UMBLEFUCK
.

1972
Sgt. E-6, U.S. Army: They probably sent those records out to Bumfuck, Egypt.
1974
P. Kingry
Monk & Marines
31: When they asked… whether he would…volunteer for Vietnam, he said he would volunteer for Bumfuk, Egypt, first!
1983
C. Eble
Campus Slang
(Nov.) 1:
Bumfuck
—the worst place: We had to park in Bumfuck, Egypt.
1986
J. Cain
Suicide Squad
20: Together, they’ll come up with some place beyond Bumfuck, Egypt, to send my sorry ass.
1999
N. Roberts
Inner Harbor
xx. 319: I don’t have all day to hang around this bumfuck town.
2001
T. H. Culley
Immortal Class
iv. 84: I could see five or six enormous radio towers…like the antennae of the Death Star—very bizarre, very bum-fuck Florida, really.
2006
C. Langston
Bicoastal Babe
vi. 46: It’s one thing to smoke the house in a white Chanel pantsuit, but it’s another thing to imagine the housewives in Bumfuck, Ohio, trying to copy the same look at their local Wal-Mart.
2006
J. P. Othmer
Futurist
12: Eastern Bumfuckistan.
2008
New York Magazine
(June 2) 40/1: I am from Bumfuck, France, okay?…I wanted to kill myself…because nothing happened. So I moved to Paris.

bumfuck
noun

1
. an act of anal intercourse.

1879
Harlequin Prince Cherrytop
4: Crumb fuck, bum fuck, not another peaceful minute.
1996
Face
(Apr.) 3/3 (table): Fancy a blow-job in Zaire or a bum-fuck in Bangladesh? Tough. As our guide to prohibited sexual
practices shows, what turns you on can turn off the authorities and land you in a rather unpleasant prison cell.
2002
R. Coover
Adventures of Lucky Pierre
145: A rush of speeded-up highlights from old movies—rapes and seductions, birchings, bumfucks, facials, and fistings.

2
. a despicable person; an idiot; wretch.

1979
Easyriders
(Dec.) 6: A pretty crafty way…to get us bumfucks to read your rag cover to cover.
1981
Easyriders
(Oct.) 47: Cut loose some of those bumfuck, hardluck losers.
2000
R. Bingham
Lightning on Sun
116: Dwayne grew more agitated. He didn’t like the sound of this bum-fuck country cracker knocking his vehicle.
2005
S. Amick
Lake, River & Other Lake
viii. 42: As far as Mark could tell, there were three types of outsiders you could be if you didn’t happen to get born and die in Weneshkeen, like the rest of these bumfucks his dad seemed to want to fit in with.

bumfuck
verb

to have anal intercourse with. Hence
bumfucker
,
noun
.

ca
1866
Romance of Lust
269: The very fine bum-fucking his adorable wife had the art of giving him.
1880
Pearl
(May): My ridicule of his ignorance made him quite ashamed of his want of knowledge, especially when I introduced him to the delights of bum-fucking, and he faithfully promised me that when Her Ladyship returned, he would insist upon his marital rights over every part of her person.
ca
1890
My Secret Life
VIII. iv.: She didn’t hesitate to say she should like to be bum-fucked again. “Just to try if there is any real pleasure in it.”
ca
1890
My Secret Life
VIII. xi.: In after years she was the most complacent creature, and did with me everything excepting bum fucking.
1967
N. Mailer
Why Are We in Vietnam?
: You… been bum fucking the wrong cunt.
1969
P. Louÿs
Mother’s Three Daughters
77: You can bum-fuck her in any posture of your choice; you can come in her mouth.
1973
T. Pynchon
Gravity’s Rainbow
547: His name was Frank, his hair curled away from his face, his eyes were rather sharp but pleasant, he stole from American Army depots, he bum-fucked me and when he came inside me, so did I.
1975
Ribald
(Sydney, Australia) (May 29) 10: Titles included “Tongue Teacher”; “The Bumfuckers”; “The House of the Golden Showers.”
1993
Saturday Night
(Toronto) (July–Aug.) 35/2: He says he remembers being “bum-fucked” by an “uncle” when he was four “but it was no big deal, the sort of thing all kids go through.”
1996
Vertigo
(Sydney, Australia) (No. 3) 12: Anal intercourse: buggery, sodomy, arse-fucking,
bum-fucking.
2002
J. W. Nichol
Midnight Cab
112: Did you pull out your wee-wee? Did you go all wet? Did you try to bum-fuck that boy?

Buttfuck
noun

a very remote place.—usually used with a placename.
Jocular
. See also BFE, B
UMBLEFUCK
.

1999
Independent
(London) (May 2): All Americans will tell you at first meeting where they come from and who their parents were, even if it’s (a) Buttfuck, South Dakota and (b) brothel-keepers.
2005
The Pitch
(Kansas City) (Nov. 3): The 80-second commute from his manse in West, West Buttfuck, Missouri, to downtown St. Louis.
2006
Observer
(July 16) (Music Mag.) 29: If Timberlake stood on a musical precipice last time around, trying to convince the world he was more than some Buttfuck, Tennessee boy-band soon-to-be-has-been, he stands on even more of one now with FutureSex.

butt-fuck
noun

1
. an act of anal copulation.

1971
H. Dahlskog
Dictionary of Contemporary & Colloquial Usage
11:
Butt fuck, v
.… To engage in anal intercourse.—[also]
n
.
1981
National Lampoon
(Apr.) 39: Let’s go to my place for brunch and a buttfuck.
1997
N.Y. Press
(Aug. 27) 18: “I need a buttfuck
now
!” screamed an overpierced male in fluorescent green Speedos.
2002
I. Welsh
Porno
374: It hits me like an iron fist in the chest that in this global communications village somehow, in some way, my father’s going to see me getting a butt-fuck.

2
. an instance of victimization; an unfortunate event.

1986
L. Heinemann
Paco’s Story
128: Iwo Jima was a sloppy, bloody butt-fuck.
2000
R. Meltzer
Whore Just Like Rest
136: At times it was like being the lone mocker in a room full of newsfolks cheerleading Reagan’s buttfuck of Grenada.
2004
C. Hiaasen
Skinny Dip
256: He…could smell a butt fuck coming a mile away, and he’d never stand still for it.

butt-fuck
verb

1
. to copulate with anally. Also in extended use. Compare earlier
BUTTFUCKER
.

1971
D. Rader
Government Inspected Meat
72: I liked to get buttfucked.
1975
J. Wambaugh
Choirboys
xii. 296: I hear when Carolina was living with that Greek bartender he used to butt-fuck her all the time.
1976
J. Vasco
Three-Hole Girl
186: It hurts so good. Oh, you butt-fuck me so good!
1979
H. Crews
Blood & Grits
122: Said if I’d butt-fuck him, he’d take me out there on the train and innerduce me.
1983
R. Eilert
For Self & Country
272 [refers to 1968]: You’re butt-fucking each other then.
1985
D. Dye
Run Between the Raindrops
129: Their…buddy has just been butt-fucked by a B-40 [rocket] or some such nonsense.
1990
D. Poyer
Gulf
186: The warriors grab the first missionary…[and] butt-fuck him.
1997
A. Bourdain
Chef’s Night Out
in K. Williamson
Rovers Return
(1998) 134: I felt like I had suddenly and inexplicably, put on a fluppy crepe and organza cocktail dress, a rubber clown nose, roller skates, wheeled out into the center of Times Square, and allowed myself to get butt-fucked by a procession of crack-heads and circus freaks.
2001
M. Spitz
We Got the Neutron Bomb
112: I have gotten butt-fucked, but never in jail. I did it on the street for the money.
2004
T. Bentley
Surrender
13: Butt-fucking is more intimate than pussy-fucking.

2
. to victimize.

1979
Maledicta
III 55: Males in particular…who have been denied promotion, given low grades…been fired, jilted [etc.]…commonly relate that they have been
screwed, fucked,…butt-fucked
…and so on.
1981
J. Wambaugh
Glitter Dome
240: He’ll be back to being butt-fucked by those bogus producers.
1982
J. M. Del Vecchio
13th Valley
491: Gettin butt-fucked.
1988
J. Stuart
Die Hard
(film): I’m not the one who just got buttfucked on national TV.
1999
D. Mitchell
Ghostwritten
221: If he… chooses to sell us up the river, we will be royally butt-fucked from here to Windsor.
2007
R. N. Patterson
Exile
177: The Zionists have been butt-fucking the Palestinians for the last three generations.

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