Authors: Tiara James
I opened my mouth to speak. “Eva-Marie, there’s something I need you to know…”
She looked at me expectantly.
I thought about how to word my explanation and sighed, giving up. “I need you.”
I set her down.
Eva still looked confused. “What? I don’t get what you’re trying to say. I
mean, I need you too but is that –”
I grabbed her hands and bore my eyes into hers to make sure she understood what
I was saying and the importance of the message. “I love you, I trust you, and I
need you. I never want you to leave me, no matter what, okay?”
Eva nodded quickly. “Okay. No matter what, I understand.” Her eyebrows were
still coming together above her dark eyes but she didn’t ask me anything else.
I
kissed her fiercely, wanting to drown out the stress and pain from everything
I’d been dealing with. I knew I was wrong for not telling her, but I would get
to it. I knew she had questions that I wasn’t letting her ask, but I also knew
that she didn’t question the one she loved…and for that I was thankful.
September 1950
M
y
parents and I sat at the dining room table sorting and counting what seemed
like endless amounts of money.
While
they were extremely cautious and concentrated, my mind was elsewhere. I
finished counting my portion and glanced out the window to see that it was
nearing the evening time – meaning David had gotten off of work not too long
ago. A mixture of anxiety and butterflies tickled at my stomach as I imagined
his lips on mine and his strong arms around me. I could almost feel the tension
in his muscles loosening as they always did when coming in contact with me
after a long day. Oh, how I adored the love of my life.
“How much did you count, dear?” My mother’s voice broke into my daydream.
“Ten thousand,” I answered, coming back to reality.
“I counted seven,” Mama nearly whispered to my father.
“Five.” Daddy shook his head and sighed. “How is it that we’re three thousand
dollars short? Where are we getting cheated?”
I sighed and shrugged hopelessly, feeling bad seeing the amount of stress on my
parents’ faces.
“Untrustworthy dealers, that’s who I think could be stealing the money.” Mama
suggested with her arms crossed across her chest staring down at the table with
a straight face.
“For the past six months they’ve been doing this and we haven’t figured out who
it is?” Daddy questioned, irritation in his voice.
“It’s a risky business with risky people, Percy.” Mama said in a calm voice.
“Why don’t we just stop now and keep the cigar company?” I blurted, my eyes
bouncing back and forth between them. It took a great amount of courage to jump
into their conversation about business but it was my life too, dammit!
They both shifted their eyes to me, appearing shocked that I’d spoken up.
I took a deep breath and continued. “Well…if we stop now, we’d be fine
financially. The cigar company will support us…it brings in just as much money
if not, more.” I eyed my father who had returned to angrily staring at the
money on the table.
“She has a point,” Mama told him after a few moments of ice cold silence.
“I won’t do it.” Daddy shook his head without looking at either of us. “I’ve
worked too hard.”
“Your work has paid off Daddy, look at all you’ve done. Stop it before it ruins
our family. More than it already has…” I trailed off in a soft voice looking
down into my lap.
I
could tell Daddy was going to be hardheaded about the situation. The burden of
our business was weighing down heavier and heavier each day – on me at least.
It caused my parents to monitor me like a hawk all the time, ultimately causing
me to revolt without them even noticing what was truly happening. To my parents,
my rebelling was just a stage but in reality I was slowly and silently going
insane in my own home.
They
controlled who I could be friends with, where I could go, and even at the age
of nineteen who I could date or
marry
for that matter, all to ensure that
the secret didn’t get out! Not to mention it was tough hiding my double life
from David, though he never asked I always felt guilty. I didn’t want to live
like that anymore nor did I want to continue to stray away from my parents
because I loved them both so much. I never wanted the life but I couldn’t help
that I was born into it and couldn’t get out.
A knock on the door broke the silence between the three of us. “Did you invite
someone over, dear?” Mama looked at me questioningly.
“Not today,” I answered.
“Nor did we have anyone scheduled to come over, Percy.” Mama said as she slowly
rose from the table.
Immediately my heartbeat began to quicken, a thousand thoughts running through
my mind, wondering if it was finally the end of my family as I knew it. I
exchanged nervous glances between my mother and the door and finally to my
father.
Daddy rose from the table. “Clean this up.” He motioned toward the money on the
table.
I did as I was told, slowly and quietly so I could hear what was going on at
the front door.
“Oh, hello. How can I help you this evening?” My father greeted the guest.
“Good to see you, Percy. Is my lovely fiancée home?” Ray’s sickening voice
streamed through the door.
I felt as if I was going to be sick to my stomach, his presence always upset
me! I dropped the money and went to escape to my room before he could see me.
Unfortunately, he was already standing in the foyer and caught me by the arm
before I could make it up the stairs.
“There you are my love,” Ray said as he tightened his grip around my arm.
“Good evening, Ray.” I said through gritted teeth.
“Ray, get your hands off of her like that.” Daddy commanded.
Ray nodded and obeyed. “Okay but what I’m about to reveal, you won’t like
Percy.”
Sweat prickled at my forehead and under my arms. What did he know? I
desperately wanted to ask but I didn’t want to give him the satisfaction in
knowing that I needed answers from him of all people. Daddy eyed me and I
dropped my eyes to the floor, not sure what to tell him. Who knew what Ray had
up his sleeve? We followed my father into the dining room where the table had
been completely cleared off by Mama.
“Ray, so nice to see you this evening.” Mama greeted him with a warm smile.
I rolled my eyes, knowing he didn’t deserve any of her charm.
“Same to you Mary, although I wish it could be under different circumstances.”
Ray put one hand on his hip and the other on the back of a chair, shaking his
head.
Ugh! He drove me up a thousand walls, everything about him made me want to deck
him in the face! However, I was desperate to hear what news he came to deliver.
After all, he did control my family’s fate.
“What’s going on?” My father demanded to know. Better him than me, if it was up
to me I would’ve beat the information out of Ray.
“Percy, Mary, I’m afraid your little princess hasn’t been so honest with you
these past few months.” Ray stated and waited for reactions.
“What’re you talking about?” I asked Ray with as much attitude as I could. On
the inside I was covering my face, terrified of what he had to say about me to
my parents. Why did it have to be about me!
A smug smile spread across his face. “You’re going to act like you don’t know,
my love?”
“What’s he talking about, Eva-Marie?” Daddy asked.
“Is there something you want to tell us, dear?” Mama eyed me with concerned
eyes.
“She won’t tell you.” Ray shook his head and began pacing around the dining
room. “Back at the beginning of the summer my lovely fiancée was saved from
drowning in a lake by the white man we know as David Finley.” He paused and
looked from me to my parents. “As I’m sure we all remember.” Ray continued to
pace. “Now fast forward a few weeks to when we were all at the New Members’
Ball and he came to apologize for the misunderstanding that occurred between
him and Percy.” He stopped pacing. “With all due respect, why would a white man
care for the opinion of a negro family?” He continued. “If I remember
correctly, you were banned from seeing him Eva-Marie.” He looked at my mother.
“Am I correct?”
Mama nodded, looking as if she was trying to understand where he was going with
the story.
“And it appeared that way for quite some time. Little did we know, Eva-Marie
was going behind all of our
backs.
” Ray said.
My face burst into a million flames! How did he know? We had been so secretive
about it! I knew there was no possible way he could’ve known. There was silence
between my parents as Ray walked a few steps over to me.
“Have you been seeing him, Eva-Marie?” He placed one hand on the back of my
chair and the other on the table, getting close to my face.
“No.” I blatantly lied.
“Look me in the eye and tell me, dear.” Ray commanded.
I slowly turned my head to look into his dark eyes, feeling defeated but I kept
fighting. “I said no.”
I
could barely hear my own voice. An unsettling feeling began swimming around in
my stomach, making me want to get up and run out of the room to the safety of
David’s arms. I could tell that Ray wasn’t going to let me get out of there
alive. I felt the night getting ready to take a drastic turn for the worst.
“Then what are these, huh!” From his pocket, Ray produced a stack of
photographs and slammed them on the table then spread them out. They were
candid pictures of David and me from recent times we’d been together. My
parents took a step closer to see, they were clearly displeased. Mama sighed
and shook her head while Daddy’s face gave nothing away.
“I’m going to ask you one more time Eva-Marie! Have you been seeing him?” Ray
shouted at me.
I couldn’t find it in me to answer Ray’s question, nor did I want to when the answer
was right in front of his face. I refused to give him the satisfaction of
giving him an answer. While I sat there with the heat from everyone’s eyes
feeling like a thousand suns on my face, I concentrated on my fingers in my
lap.
“So you’re not going to answer, huh? Okay well I can predict that you’d all be
too
pleased to know who Eva’s really been having around.” Ray grabbed my chin and
forced me to look up at him. “That is if you even know, my darling.”
At that point I was truly confused as to what he could be talking about. He
busted me, hadn’t he done his job? I looked at him with furrowed eyebrows. “I’m
not listening to anything you have to say. Nothing you say will change my mind
about him.”
“That’s where you’re wrong!” Ray chuckled and threw down a manila folder and
flipped it open. “I don’t think you’d be too happy to know that your little
boyfriend has been lying about everything ever since he first met you.”
“What are you talking about?” I asked, growing worried. In my head I convinced
myself that anything he said about David would be false. I trusted David more
than I trusted Ray.
“Read the information, Eva-Marie or do I need to spell it out for you?” Ray
asked and pointed to the information next to David’s picture in the folder.
“Right here in plain-text it says that David Finley is actually a David O’Neil
the son of Warren O’Neil. In other words the son of the Chief of Police.”
Almost
immediately a lump formed in my throat as I read the information for myself.
O’Neil?
Chief of Police? No!
I didn’t want to believe it. “You’re lying,” I told
him.
“And
you’re in denial! Would you like to know the best part? He’s an undercover cop
who’s been assigned to bust a drug case. What drug you might ask? Trioxytin. He
doesn’t love you Eva-Marie, he’s
using
you to bring an end to his case
but little does he know that it’s right in front of his face!” Ray concluded. I
could hear my mother gasp and my father curse loudly.
“Did
you give him any information?” My father demanded.
I
couldn’t answer. I was dealing with a shock of my own.
Daddy
slammed his hand down on the table hard enough to make the photos of David and
I vibrate. “Dammit, Eva-Marie Noel Hutchinson I need you to fucking answer me!”
It felt as if someone had cut the oxygen supply to my lungs. For a moment I
thought my heart had just combusted inside of my chest. My mind was racing and
anxiety was taking over. “Stop! Stop! Just stop it, I can’t take it!”
Ray grabbed me firmly by the wrists and forced me to stand up. “Let’s go, it
looks like your time here in this town is going to be cut short due to the
potential damage you’ve caused.” He began to lead me out of the dining room.
“What? Where are we going?” I asked, my voice beginning to whine.
“To meet up with that pig of yours so you can end whatever it is you two have
going on. You and I are leaving town next week and that’s when we’ll be getting
married, I don’t need him chasing after you. You’ve put yourself and your
family at risk, all for selfish reasons. Or was it to spite them for all
they’ve done to you…? Either way, I have to get you out of here. Lord knows
what you said to that pig to get your parents arrested.” Ray shook his head and
tried to force me through the foyer.