SHANE
22
My blood was boiling as I sat at Waffle House by myself and ate breakfast. Now I knew exactly what Jaylin meant about getting away from all of this bullshit. This was an ongoing thing, and frankly, I was getting tired of it. So many things with Felicia didn't sit right with me. Once upon a time, I dated her, worked with her, and even gave her my love. I knew how scantless she could be. One minute she was cool, and the next minute she wasn't. She was being nice now because she wantedâneededâsomething from me. I was positive that once all of this mess was over, she'd be singing a new tune. And by knowing so, I wasn't sure what it was about me that wanted to help. My good spirit said I shouldn't turn my back on her, but it was obvious my spirit was tripping. I guess it was my mother's words that told me I had to forgive those who knew no better. She taught me to be a forgiving person, and most of the time I tried to live by what she'd taught me.
As for Scorpio, I knew for a fact she was more than livid with me. Thing was, I hated to be talked to like a punk. I hated for a woman to curse at me, and even though I wanted her to stay last night, her tone set me off. I had plans to go see her later, but I wasn't about to apologize for what had happened.
While finishing up breakfast, I reached for my phone to call Jaylin. Just in case anything went down, I wanted him to know the details. I was hesitant about telling him about Felicia, simply because I knew how he felt about her. But the phone call had to be made, so I made it.
Surprisingly, with it being so early, Jaylin answered the phone.
“You're up rather early,” I said. “Got something on your mind?”
“Yeah, some more sleep. Jaylene got a cold, and I've been up all night. Her
mother,
Nanny B, cut out on me and fell asleep.”
I laughed. “Well, give Jaylene a kiss for me. I'm sure she'll feel better after that.”
“Only a kiss from her daddy will make her feel better. Giving her one from you might be a dangerous thing.”
“I doubt it, but give her one, anyway. I hope she gets better.”
“I do too. So, why in the fuck are you calling me this early?”
“Because I was having breakfast, thinking about what you said. I'm on my way to see Stephon this morning. Apparently, he's back on drugs and causing a lot of trouble. Just in case something happens to your cousin, I wanted you to be informed ahead of time.”
“Shane, you and I both know that I disowned Stephon a few years ago. After all that he's done to us, I don't know why it is any concern of yours if he's causing trouble. Trouble is his middle name. Always has been and always will be. There is nothing you can say to him that will change him. You're wasting your time.”
“I ain't trying to change him, but I feel compelled to talk to the brotha about bullshitting people around.”
“A bullshitter will always be a bullshitter. What in the hell brought all this about, anyway?”
“When I got back from out of town, there was a note on my door from Felicia. Last night, she stopped by and told me that he jumped on her and possibly drugged her. Now, I know how you feel about her, but I had a hard time turning my back on her. She's afraid of him and afraid to go home. She asked if she could stay with me last night, or until things cool down.”
Jaylin was quiet, and then he spoke up. “What is wrong with you, Shane? Sometimes, I have a hard-ass time figuring you out. Felicia and Stephon are bad, bad news. Are you just plain ole stupid, or do you pretend to be that way quite often? Iâ”
“A man such as you, Jaylin, wouldn't understand. As for being stupid, I'm far from it. What is stupid is a man who has just about everything in life he's ever dreamed of, but when the time comes for him to give back a little bit of himself, he falls short. Forgiving people is something that you should've learned by now, but your arrogance won't let you. It has cost you time, money, and almost your wife and kids, but you still don't get it. That, in itself, sounds stupid to me, and the next time you call me stupid, you need to take a look in the mirror at your own self.”
“Fuck you, Shane,” he said calmly. “I've been giving handouts to broke-back motherfuckas for years. The only thing it's gotten me is a swift kick in my ass. You talk about forgiveness, and I've been forgiving people for their mishaps all my life. I forgave Stephon for lying to me about my child, and fucking not one, but two of the women I loved. I forgave Felicia for all the backstabbing she did and still gave you and her money to start a business. I forgave Scorpio for lying, cheating, and manipulating me throughout our relationship.
“And just recently ...” His voice rose. “I forgave you for calling yourself my slap happy-ass friend, but putting your tongue inside of my wife's mouth! How much forgiveness do you want from a nigga, Shane? Please! Don't piss me the fuck off this morning! I'm tired, and I'm not in the mood! If you want to be a hero, then go ahead and be one! Don't expect me to be one, too!”
The phone went dead. I wanted to call his ass back, but instead, I closed my phone and placed it in my pocket. I tried to look at it from his point of view, but I couldn't. Now I was even more than ready to confront Stephon, so I finished my breakfast and left.
By the time I made it to Stephon's shop, he was already there. From the outside, I could see him raising the blinds. I parked my car, and he saw me coming from a short distance. He pulled the door open to let me in.
“What a pleasure,” he said sarcastically. “You trust me to start cutting your hair again?”
I stood by the door with my hands in my pockets. “Stephon, you know I'm not here to get my hair cut. I came here to correct you about what you did to Felicia.”
“Correct me? What in the hell are you talking about?”
“I'm talking about you fucking over everybody that's been there for you, man. When does it stop? It's like you intentionally hurt those who want to reach out and help you.”
Stephon walked away from the door and sat in one of the styling chairs. He slowly moved from side to side, massaging his chin.
“I'm curious. Exactly what did Felicia tell you happened between us the other night?”
“You already know what happened. She's afraid for her life, and you should be ashamed of yourself for putting fear like that in a woman.”
“Felicia ain't afraid of nothing. She's playing you, Shane. She got mad because I was with another female earlier that day and left with her. Later that night, Felicia broke into my house. She started swinging on me and shit, and I let the bitch have it. We started fucking, and I put a hurting on that ass. When I woke up, she was gone.”
“So you're telling me she's lying about you drugging her? And about you threatening to kill her?”
“I ain't threatened no damn body. And as for drugging her, I don't associate myself with drugs anymore. I've been clean for over a year, and I'm trying to get myself back together. I come to work on time to make decent money, and thanks to my pussy-driven-ass cousin, my second mortgage on the shop is paid for, in full.”
“Speaking of Jaylin, why you be dissing him after all he's done for you? I don't understand your hatred for him, but I do understand his hatred for you. You were wrong, Stephon. Dead wrong and you really missed out on having a dear friend and cousin for life.”
Stephon punched his chest. “You're forgetting one thingâhe's the one who turned his back on me. I tried to reach out to the brotha and apologize, but he wasn't hearing it. Now, after all is said and done, you're fucking his ex and he's best friends with you. It doesn't make sense, Shane, and I don't give a damn who's in my corner these days. I have an agenda, and I'm not gon' let Jaylin, you, or Felicia's mental illness stand in my way. That bitch is crazy.”
Honestly, I didn't know what the hell to believe. Feeling as if I'd wasted my time, I reached for the doorknob and wished Stephon well.
“You be easy, too, Shane,” he said, getting out of the chair and walking up to the door.
He reached out for my hand, and even though I hesitated, I reached out to shake his. He gripped it tight, and we both let go. As soon as I got ready to walk out, he called my name.
“What's up?” I said, turning to face him.
“I thought you were coming in here to correct me? Since you didn't, I think that maybe I should correct you.”
Stephon caught me off guard and butted his head with mine. When I tightened my eyes to fight back the pain, I felt his fist slam into the side of my face. Another powerful blow hit me in the mouth, and the punch to my stomach sent me staggering to one knee. Then came the uppercut. I fell back in slow motion and landed on my back. In pain, I squirmed around on the floor and tried with the little strength I had to get up. Stephon stood over me and placed his foot hard on my stomach.
“You don't want to fuck with me, Shane. And don't forget to tell that bitch Felicia I'm coming to get her. My advice for you would be to mind your own fucking business. Unless you want to die.”
He gathered spit in his mouth and spat in my face. As he was getting ready to walk away, I grabbed his ankle. I held on to it tight and wanted so badly to get up and kick his ass. Instead, he brought his other foot around, swinging it in the direction of my face. I blocked it with my other hand and yanked his ass to floor. Because I was so weak, he slipped from my embrace like butter. All I had was one of his tennis shoes in my hand, and he broke out, running to the back of his shop. I wasn't sure where he was headed, but when I heard a car skid off, I knew he had left.
I maneuvered myself from the floor and slowly made my way to my car. I didn't have time to check for scars, but I certainly knew they were there. I opened the door to my car and squatted to reach underneath my seat. I pulled out my gun, placing it down inside my pants. I felt underneath the seat again for my bullets and put a handful of them in my pocket. I limped back into Stephon's shop, loaded my gun, and thought hard before pulling the trigger.
“Mama wouldn't like this. But, sometimes a man's got to do what a man's got to do.”
I pulled the trigger and filled Stephon's barbershop with bullet holes. Once the gun was empty, I reloaded and emptied it again. I could hear the screams from the residents who lived above the shop, but I made sure not to aim the bullets in their direction. Once I walked out, I fired into the huge glass front windows and quickly jetted.
Needing no sympathy at all, when I got back to my place, Felicia was all over me. She saw the blood on my shirt from the small cut underneath my eye and the gash on my chin. She hysterically cried, following me to my room. I ignored her questions.
“Shane, please tell me what happened! Let me take you to the doctor to get some stitches!”
I walked into the bathroom, ripped my shirt from my chest, and reached for a towel in the closet. I ran warm water on it and pressed the towel against the cut on my chin. It appeared to be the most damaging one, so I worked on trying to get the bleeding to stop.
“Let me see it,” Felicia said, pulling on the towel.
I yanked it away from her. “Would you please go some damn where and sit down! Damn!”
“I'm just trying to help,” she said. “Can I take you to the emergency room?”
I lowered the bloody towel on the sink and gave her a look that could kill. She got the message and left the bathroom. She sat on the edge of my bed, placed her hands over her eyes, and sobbed.
I wasn't up for hearing it. I cleaned my face as best as I could, made sure my keys were in my pocket, and went into my bedroom.
“I'll be back. Don't answer my phone or my door. And for your own safety, don't leave here until I get back.”
She nodded, and I put on a clean button-down shirt from the closet and left.
Unable to get the cut on my chin to stop bleeding, I drove to the hospital. In less than two hours, I was all stitched up and ready to go. The doctor put a small healing pad on the cut underneath my eye, and it took several stitches to close the gash on my chin. I was glad the bleeding had stopped, but my body was still in so much pain. Before I left, I asked the doctor for a few pain pills, to hold me over until I made it to the pharmacy to fill the prescription he'd given me. He gave me three aspirins and I downed them in the car. Afterward, I made my way to Jay's to see Scorpio.
As usual, the place was packed. I found a parking spot down the street and tried to wipe off the several drops of blood on my shirt that had dripped on it before I made it to the hospital. I didn't want Scorpio to panic, but the napkin I used did nothing.
Normally, whenever I walked into the shop, everyone got real quiet. Today the same thing happened, but Jamaica stopped me on the way back to Scorpio's office.
“You can't speak?” she said.
“What's up, everybody?” I said.
“What happened to your face? Did you fall off your bike or something?”